Gal
"O, ba't maga 'yang mga mata mo?"
Napatigil ako sa tanong ni Papa. Kakakuha ko lang ng tubig sa ref habang siya naman ay kumakain ng agahan. He's in his corporate attire now, which means he's off to work.
Ang aga ko pala talagang nagising kahit matagal akong nakatulog kagabi sa kakaiyak. It's still 7 in the morning.
I cleared my throat.
"Nanood lang ng movies kagabi, Pa," palusot ko. Ramdam ko ang pagtitig niya sa'kin sandali, tila ba naninimbang. But eventually, he nodded.
"Sino naghatid sa'yo? Sina Care ba?"
Great. He probably thought I went out with the gang.
Uminom muna ako ng tubig bago humarap sa kanya.
"Si Ike, po."
I didn't need to elaborate. Kilala naman na kasi ni Papa si Ike. But he doesn't know about us. I never told him. Pero kung may napansin man siyang kakaiba sa amin no'n, ewan ko.
He paused for a second before replying.
"Tagal ko nang hindi nakikita 'yung batang 'yun, ah," aniya, tumatayo at nililigpit ang pinagkainan. "Papuntahin mo naman dito minsan."
'Over my dead body', I bitterly thought.
Medyo nagtaka rin ako sa ibig niyang sabihin. Does he mean Ike and the rest of the barkada? O... si Ike lang?
Either ways, tumango na lang din ako at ibinalik ang pitsel sa ref. Sabay kaming naglakad ni papa patungo sa sala. He then reached for his briefcase before giving me a kiss on the forehead.
"I'll see you at dinner, sweetie."
I felt a surge of emotions run through me. Parang gusto ko ulit maiyak. Kaya nang hahakbang na sana siya palayo ay mahigpit ko siyang niyakap. Natigilan siya dahil do'n. Pero 'di kalaunan ay niyakap niya na rin ako palapit.
"Woah," natatawa niyang sabi. "Everything okay?"
Napapikit ako ng mariin. I endulged on the warmth of his chest against my cheek. I've always been a daddy's girl. Siguro ay dahil wala naman akong choice. Siya lang naman talaga ang meron ako simula pa no'n. He's a single dad and he's pretty good at it. Kahit kailan, hindi siya nagkulang.
"Everything's fine," I whispered, finally letting go. Tinitigan niya 'ko sandali.
"Are you sure, Galeley?"
No.
"Yes."
Hindi ko alam kung nakumbinse ko ba si papa na paniwalaan ako. Basta ay hindi na siya nagtanong pa. I don't know if he's just giving me some space, but if he is, I really appreciate it.
Nang makaalis ay pumanhik na 'ko sa sariling kwarto. All I want to do today is sulk. Hindi man totoo yung sinabi ko na nanood lang ako ng movies kagabi, pero 'yun naman ang plano kong gawin ngayong araw.
So that's what I did. I watched one movie after another, nag brunch ako bandang alas dose. And then back at it again. Nang makaramdam ng umay ay in-off ko na lang ang laptop at humiga sa kama. I stared at the ceiling, my mind drifting somewhere else.
Napabuntonghininga ako.
I'll admit, yesterday was fun.
Every single moment I spent with Ike seem to play on the white space above like a movie scene, as I find myself recalling each one of them.
We were doing so great, I almost believed we were back in time. How did things change so fast? Yung sa isang iglap, bigla na lang kaming nag-away. Sa isang iglap, nailabas namin lahat ng hinanakit na matagal na pala naming itinatago mula sa isa't-isa.
I turned my head to the bedside table. Ang cam-corder agad ang nakita ko. Naalala ko tuloy si Tresh. My eyes turned into slits.
That manipulative asshole.
Bigla-biglang bumuhos ang matinding galit na naramdaman ko para sa kanya kagabi. That cam-corder only serves as a reminder of what he did! Ang kapal talaga ng mukha niya! Akala niya kaya niyang kontrolin lahat nang tao sa paligid niya! I can't believe he made me one of his stupid puppets!
Hindi na ako nag-isip. Basta'y inis akong bumangon at kinuha ang susi ng Ducati bike ni Papa pati na rin ang cam-corder. Nagmamadali akong lumabas ng bahay, hindi man lang inaalintana ang pajamas na suot. Ni hindi pa 'ko naliligo pero bahala na! I am still so pissed off, I can't control it.
I put the keys in and started the engine. Dad gave me the permission to use this so this should be fine.
As the engine roared, I then drove and made my way to the center of the city, where Tresh's bistro is located. Mag-aalas singko na pero determinado talaga akong ibalik sa kanya 'tong lecheng cam-corder na 'to. I don't want to have anything to do with this. Isa pa, kung mananatili lang 'to sa bahay, baka magdilim lang ang paningin ko't ihagis ko 'to sa labas o gibain gamit ang martilyo. Mahirap na.
I eventually reached Uptown just in time. Buti na lang at maaga pa kaya talagang kakaunti lang ang customers. This place usually gets jampacked from 6 o'clock onwards.
"Where's your boss?" tanong ko sa isang crew ro'n. Mukhang nagulat pa siya sa bigla kong pag-approach sa kanya. At talagang pinasadahan niya pa ang suot kong pantulog!
He stopped mopping and nervously pointed at a door at the far end of the room. I can tell it's Tresh's office. My anger worsened. Galit akong nagmartsa patungo sa opisina niya. Hindi na nga ako kumatok. I just barged in like I owned the place. Gumawa 'yon ng malakas na tunog kaya agad napako ang tingin ni Tresh sa akin. To my surprise though, Care is also here. Nakatayo siya habang si Tresh naman ay nakaupo sa swivel chair at nakayakap sa baywang niya. Mukhang nagmo-moment sila pero wala talaga akong pakealam!
"Gal!" Care exclaimed, stepping away from her boyfriend. Maputi siya kaya kitang-kita ko kung paano siya pinamulahan dahil sa hiya.
If I weren't too angry, I wouldn't have ignored her. Pero talagang masyado akong galit. Nakatutok lang ako sa mukha ni Tresh na halatang gulat din. Nakakasurok ng dugo ang pagmumukha niya! Ugh!
I tightened my hold on the cam-corder and determinedly marched towards the bastard. Tumayo siya nang makita ang pagpupuyos ko.
"Gal-" He tried to stop me. He even gestured his hand as if trying to calm me down but too bad, he's already too late. When I finally reached him, I harshly shoved the cam-corder to his chest. Gulat pero mabilis niya 'yong hinawakan.
We met eye to eye and I made sure he can see just how mad I am. Meanwhile, Care remained shocked and speechless.
"Fuck you and your selfish games, Tresh!"
My voice came out louder than I expected it to be. But so much for laying low! Kasi wala talaga akong pake kung marinig man ako ng lahat. O, kahit pa marinig ako ni Care.
I turned my back on him after that, while they didn't dare to speak, probably still too taken aback by my sudden entrance. Wala na sana akong balak lumingon kaso meron pa pala akong gustong sabihin kaya naman bumaling ulit ako.
"At h'wag na h'wag ka nang magpapakita sa'king gago ka! Pare-pareho lang kayo ng kaibigan mo! Magsama kayo!"
And then that's it. I stormed out of the room, not bothering to listen to their poor attempt to stop me. I noticed how the staffs gave me their fearful stares. They looked terrified. At nang sinasalubong ko ang mga tingin nila ay kusa na silang umiiwas. I'm pretty sure they heard everything.
But the hell I care.
"Isang malaking gago ang boss niyo," Nakangiti ko pang anunsiyo bago tuluyang lumabas.
I gathered up some fresh air right after heading outside. I feel so much better. See? I just needed to let it all out.
Satisfied by what I did, I rode the bike
on the way home. Pero bago 'yon ay tumungo muna ako sa isang convenience store para bumili ng alak. At eto na nga't kakauwi ko lang. Mag-isa ulit sa kwarto.
I stared at my phone. Walang kahit anong text o tawag do'n mula sa kanya. I smiled bitterly. Glad he's cooperating. Baka paulanan ko siya ng mura sa oras na tumawag siya.
Nag-iwas ako ng tingin bago lumagok mula sa beer can. Nagtagal ang tingin ko sa kawalan.
'Huling beses,' sabi ko sa sarili ko. 'Pangako, ito ang huling beses na maglalasing ako dahil kay Ike.'
A tear slowly fell down and I just let it.
Ito rin ang huling beses na iiyakan ko siya.
Napatawa pa 'ko nang kaunti kahit patuloy na sa pagbagsak ang mga luha. I wiped my cheeks using the back of my hand.
Tangina niya. Tangina niya talaga.
~*~
"Hello, Bee! What's up?" masigla kong bati matapos sagutin ang tawag.
"Leche kang bruha ka!" pambungad niya. Nailayo ko tuloy nang wala sa oras ang phone dahil sa matinis niyang boses. "Anong 'what's up'?! Jusko, Galeley! Ilang araw mong hindi pinansin mga text at tawag namin! Ang sabi mo lang h'wag kang bisitahin at kausapin! E, malay ba namin kung napa'no ka na?! Naku, bibigwasan kita kapag nagkita tayo, ta'mo!"
I bit my lip to stop myself from laughing. Baka mas magalit siya kung tumawa pa 'ko.
"Hoy, si Gal ba 'yan?" Rinig ko si Cam sa kabilang linya. "Akin na nga! Kausapin ko!"
May iilang kaluskos akong narinig bago muling nagsalita si Bee.
"Uy, wow sizt, teka lang naman-" Bee tried to say but Camille must have snatched the phone from him already dahil ang boses niya na ang sumalubong sa tenga ko.
"OMG, Gal! Ano na? Kamusta ka, girl?" As usual, ang lakas pa rin niyang magsalita. "Nag-alala kami sa'yo, MIA ka bigla! Ano? nag soul-searching ka? Hinanap mo sarili mo? Ganern? Ba't wala ka man lang pics sa IG, ha?"
This time, natawa na 'ko. Gosh. I missed them. Mag-iisang linggo pa lang naman na hindi ko sila nakakausap pero parang nakalimutan ko na kung gaano sila kaingay. Good thing, magkasama sila ngayon. Gumagala siguro.
E, si Care kaya kasama rin nila? 'Di pa 'ko nakakapag-apologize tungkol sa ginawa ko ro'n sa office ng jowa niya, e.
Huminga ako nang malalim.
"Hindi, nagstay lang ako ro'n sa bahay ng lola ko. Bumisita lang sandali."
Totoo 'yon. Narealize ko kasi na ayokong magmukmok na lang sa bahay kaya ayon. Mas mabuti na rin kasi at least, do'n kina lola, hindi ako mag-isa most of the time. At nando'n din mga bata kong pinsan. They kept me busy while I was there. The busier, the better. Kasi halos hindi dumadaan sa isip ko si Ike.
But now I'm back. Mas magaan na ang pakiramdam ko. At heto nga't sinagot ko na ang tawag nina Bee. Sa wakas! Dahil talagang araw-araw nila akong tinatawagan pero hindi ko talaga sinasagot.
"Ah, kaya pala," aniya. "Pero grabe ka naman! Ni hindi mo man lang kami ininform! Nakakainis ka! Alam mo ba'ng-"
She stopped mid-sentence. Naririnig kong may nagsasalita sa background. Camille's voice then sounded faint.
"Ha? Kausapin mo rin?" tanong niya sa kung sino. "O'sige, sige. Gal, kausapin ka daw ni Care."
My eyes widened.
"O-oy, teka!"
Nandyan pala siya?!
Before I can even get ready, Care's gentle voice already took over.
"Gal."
I went speechless for a split second. Well, this is sort of... awkward. Parang nung Saturday lang, inaway ko ang boyfriend niya.
I winced.
"H-Hi, Care."
Care rarely gets mad. 'Tsaka kung magalit man siya, halos hindi naman halata kasi ang galing niyang pumeke ng ngiti. Ewan ko lang ngayon. I mean, what if na-offend siya sa ginawa ko noong nakaraan?
"How are you?" she asked. Her voice was laced with genuine concern. Hmm. Parang hindi naman siya galit.
I shifted on my seat. I'm currently here in the living room of our house.
"Eto, ayos lang naman. Uhm," I paused. Tinitingnan ko kung ngayon ko na ba dapat i-bring up yung nangyari. In the end, I chose to just get on with it. "Care, sorry nga pala sa-"
"You don't have to," pagputol niya. "In fact, ako nga dapat humingi nang sorry sa'yo."
Napaawang nang kaunti ang labi ko. I didn't know what to say. Nang hindi makasagot ay nagpatuloy siya.
"Tresh told me everything. And yes, he was such an asshole. Kaya sorry talaga for that, Gal."
Still, I didn't answer. Iniisip ko pa kung ano ang dapat sabihin. Sa totoo lang, hindi naman talaga siya ang dapat humingi ng tawad sa'kin, e. At isa pa, I'm a bit concerned, too. Baka nag-away sila ni Tresh. Oo, galit ako sa kanya pero ayoko namang madamay ang relasyon nila ni Care, 'no. Sure, may pagkagago siya. Pero to be fair, I can say na talagang iba naman ang pag-trato niya kay Care. He treats her like she's his queen. Sayang naman kung ako pa ang maging dahilan ng pagkakalabuan nilang dalawa. Edi dadagdag pa 'yon sa konsensya ko?
"Hoy, Kare-kare, naiiyak ka ba?" I heard Bee's voice. Do'n ako natauhan. Napakurap pa 'ko nang eksaktong narinig ang pagsinghot ni Care sa kabilang linya.
I instantly panicked.
"C-Care! Hoy, ano ka ba, h'wag kang umiyak!"
She chuckled a little. Sumapaw naman sina Cam.
"Ayonnnnn, wala na, naiyak na si carebear! Ano ginawa mo dyan, Gal?"
Mas lalo lang akong nataranta. Bwiset 'tong Camille na 'to! Nang-aasar pa!
"Care, trust me, hindi mo kailangang mag sorry! 'Tsaka, okay naman na 'ko, e. Promise!"
Eventually, sumagot din naman siya. Pero halata na talaga na umiiyak. Among the four of us, Care is definitely the most fragile and emotional. Kaya nag-iingat kami pag dating sa kanya.
"No, Gal. Even if you say na okay ka na, hindi pa rin okay yung ginawa ni Tresh."
She has a point.
"But don't worry. Tresh and I will never be on speaking terms hangga't hindi siya humihingi nang tawad sa'yo in person."
Ikinagulat ko 'yon. So they really... fought? What the hell. This is only making me feel bad.
"That's not right. Naapektuhan ko pati ang relasyon niyo."
"No, you shouldn't feel guilty. You're one of my bestfriends and I don't want you getting hurt. This is the least I can do for you."
I suddenly felt my eyes sting. What she said warmed my heart so much. Jusko! Ano ba naman 'to!
"Pinapaiyak mo naman ako carebear, e!" reklamo ko, tumitingala upang mapigilan ang mga luhang nagbabadyang tumulo. "Alam mo, bagay talaga sa'yo 'yang pangalan mo! Nagc-care ka sa lahat!"
Natawa siya ro'n habang rinig ko ulit sina Bee na kasama niya.
"Awww."
"Magpakita ka na sa'min, Galeley! Group hug tayo!"
That's how the rest of my morning went. Pagkatapos naming mag-drama ay nagkwentuhan na lang kami. Niyaya pa nila akong humabol sa café kung saan sila tumatambay pero humindi ako. Next time na lang. Pagod din kasi ako sa byahe. Kakauwi ko lang galing kina lola.
After our long conversation, I took a bath. Plano kong bumawi na lang muna nang tulog. 'Yun nga ang ginawa ko. As usual, ako nanaman mag-isa rito sa bahay dahil weekday ngayon. Isa talaga 'to sa downside ng buhay ko. Dalawa lang kami ni papa tapos wala pa siya rito madalas.
Around 4pm, nagising ako dahil sa tunog ng doorbell. Imposibleng si papa dahil may sarili naman 'yong susi. Baka sina Bee?
Aba, 'yung mga bruhang 'yun! 'Di pa nakuntento sa magdamag naming kwentuhan kanina!
I went out of my room, still sleepy. Halos humihikab pa 'ko nang buksan ang pinto.
My yawn came into a pause when I saw who it is. Agad akong nainis.
"Anong ginagawa mo dito?"
I spoke with a hint of attitude kasi talagang sa simpleng pagtingin ko pa lang sa mukha niya, naiinis na 'ko!
He sighed.
"Nandito ako para mag sorry."
I put on a very sarcastic smile and held the doorknob.
"Too late," Nakangiti ko pa ring sabi at umaktong isasara na ang pinto. He used his hand to stop me.
"Gal naman."
Hindi ko siya pinansin. He's a lot stronger than me kaya nahihirapan akong isara nang tuluyan ang lecheng pinto na 'to!
In the end, I gave up. Asar ko na lang siyang hinarap.
"Admit it, Tresh. Hindi mo naman gagawin 'to kung hindi dahil kay Care! H'wag na tayong magplastikan!"
Kumunot ang noo niya.
"Of course, not. Kusa akong pumunta rito."
So what?
I rolled my eyes, refusing to break my walls down. Gano'n na rin naman 'yun. Motivated pa rin siyang gawin 'to para kausapin siya ulit ni Carebear.
"I don't wanna hear it."
I attempted to close the door again pero pinigilan niya nanaman. I tried harder. Halos buong lakas ko na ang ginagamit ko at epektibo naman 'yon dahil parang mas nage-exert na rin ng effort si Tresh. Pero sa totoo lang, mukha kaming tanga.
"Dammit!" he exclaimed after a while. Napagtanto niya siguro na hindi ako magpapatalo.
Tumigil kaming dalawa. I glared at him while he gave me a defeated stare. Matapos ay nagpakawala siya nang buntonghininga.
"At least hear me out."
That's his bargain. Siguro kung sobrang galit pa rin ako at hindi kami nag-usap ni Care kanina, baka diretso ko na siyang pinaalis.
Tsk.
I thought hard about it before nodding. Osige na nga. Para kay kare-kare.
Tresh looked relieved.
"Okay, unang-una sa lahat, I'm sorry. What I did back then was out of the line."
"Hindi lang out of the line. Talagang lumagpas pa ng iilang kilometro," mataray kong giit. I saw his jaw clenched. This is probably so hard for him to do, lalo na dahil hindi siya sanay humihingi nang patawad.
Pinigilan ko ang pagngisi at hinintay siyang magpatuloy.
"Yes, I went beyond the line. Kaya sorry. I never should've done that. Napaka-insensitive no'n. At gusto ko lang klaruhin na labas si Ike do'n, okay? I was the one who made the bet with Bea. I was the one who lost. Ike just got dragged in, that's all."
At ipinagtatanggol niya pa talaga ang bestfriend niya! Grabe.
"I'm sorry about the recent challenge, too. Tama ka. Gago nga ako at selfish. I've learned my lesson. Simula ngayon, quit na 'ko sa mga laro-laro at mga challenges." aniya. "Trust me, Gal. I value you as my friend. Hindi kita tinuturing na kaibigan dahil lang girlfriend ko si Care. I genuinely care about you because you are my friend. You're part of my main circle. Truth is, pinagawa ko lang naman sa inyo ang challenge dahil deep inside, I'm still rooting for the both of you."
Wala na 'kong panahon makapag-react sa mga una niyang sinabi dahil mabilis na napukaw noong panghuli ang atensyon ko.
"I think you and Ike deserves to be happy," he said as the look on his face softened. "Pero looking at it now, siguro... mas mainam talaga na in separate ways kayong maging masaya. Hindi together."
I swallowed the lump in my throat. Hindi ako makasagot. Why did his last statement seem to hurt a little?
"Anyways," sabi niya matapos ang medyo emosyonal na apology. "I... brought this with me. Just in case."
My forehead creased as my eyes fell down on the object in his hand. Dala-dala niya pala 'yan? Ba't 'di ko napansin?
Bahagya nanamang umusbong ang kaunting galit sa buong sistema ko. My voice went cold as I stared at the cam-corder.
"I don't wan't anything to do with that."
"Come on, Gal. At least watch a few snippets," he convinced me. Pero hindi tumatalab.
"Tresh, ibinalik ko nga 'yan sa'yo dahil ayoko 'di ba?"
"Just give it a try."
I shook my head.
"Ayoko. Talagang ipapanood mo 'yang mga videos sa'kin? Pa'no pa 'ko magiging okay nyan?"
Ubod ng sungit ang pagkakasabi ko sa mga salita. Kasi naman! Nagmo-move on nga ulit ako tapos papanoorin ko pa 'yung mga 'yon? Parang tanga lang?
Tresh sighed. Halatang nauubusan na siya nang pasensya. Wow. Hindi niya talaga forte ang panunuyo nang ibang tao, 'no? Talagang kay Care lang siya sweet.
"Whatever. Iiwan ko na lang 'to rito."
Yumuko siya at umaktong ilalapag ang cam-corder sa sahig kaya pinigilan ko.
"Hoy, ano ba! Tsk! O'sige na! Akin na!" sabay hablot nito mula sa kanya. Mahirap na! Baka maabutan 'to ni papa rito at panoorin niya ang laman!
Umirap ako, iritado.
"Umalis ka na nga!"
He smirked as if he just won a battle. There goes his usual smirk! Anong akala niya? Na ayos na lahat?
"Am I forgiven?"
I made a face.
"Hindi!"
And then I shut the door in front of his face. Hah! Magdusa siya! Papatawarin ko rin naman siya eventually pero sa ngayon, magdusa muna siya sa sitwasyon nila ni Care.
Not long after, Tresh decided to leave. Hindi na siya nangulit pa. Pagpasok ko sa kwarto ay narinig ko pa ang busina ng sasakyan niya, tila sinasabi sa'kin na aalis na siya.
Meanwhile, I placed the cam-corder on my bed-side table before laying on my bed. Tinitigan ko 'to.
Tingnan mo nga naman. Isinoli ko na't lahat, pero sa huli, babalik at babalik pa rin pala sa dati nitong pwesto.
I drew my breath. Should I really check it out?
Para saan pa, Gal?
Uhm... para makita ko kung marami ba akong haggard moments do'n?
O, para makita ko kung maayos ba ang pagkakavideo nang sa ganoon ay makumbinse ko na ang sariling gumawa ng sariling YouTube channel? Kasi baka vlogging talaga ang nakalaan para sa'kin. Mag-vlogger na lang ako.
Ugh. Pero seryoso nga. Para saan?
I spent about half an hour just making up my mind. In the end, I decided to watch it. I mean, ano naman kung panoorin ko nga? Wala namang magbabago.
I grabbed the cam-corder from the table and pushed the 'On' button. Dumiretso ako sa content at tumigil sa pinakaunang video na kinuha namin. Gusto kong panoorin mula sa simula.
I started watching it. At first, I thought it was nothing I haven't already seen or remembered. Lalo na ang mahahabang videos. Little did I know, the one thing that would really catch my attention was the snippets.
Nothing but snippets.
Just snippets of the moments we had.
Just some short, simple shots of me that Ike took. And by the time I finished the last one, I was already crying. That was all it took for me to change my mind.
Nag-uumapaw ako sa sobrang emosyon. I feel like I'm going to burst. At hindi na rin ako nag-aksaya pa ng oras. Sa mga sandaling 'to, isa lang ang gusto kong gawin. Sigurado ako.
I got out of my bed and dialed Ike's number, my hands slightly shaking. I anxiously waited pero mukhang naka-off ang cellphone niya!
Seeking for another way, I dialed up Tresh.
-------
Snippet 1 - Grocery store
*A shot of Gal seriously checking out different products to put on the cart*
"You're ignoring me," puna ni Ike. She didn't answer.
"Aww," he zooms in the camera. "You still jealous, baby?"
She looks at him with a death glare.
-------
"Hello, Tresh? Where are you?" tanong ko, getting straight to the point.
"Hello to you too, Ms. In-a-hurry," He joked, sensing the urgency in my voice. He actually sounded so relaxed, like he already knew this would happen.
Whatever.
"I just got back here in the bistro," pagpapatuloy niya.
"Where's Ike right now?"
"Uhm... in his apartment?"
Napanatag ako at magsasalita na sana nang may idinagdag pa siya.
"Pero ang sabi niya, may flight daw siya papuntang CDO mamaya. Inutusan siya ni Uncle Eric na dumalo sa isang conference."
"What?!"
"Yep. He should be leaving in about..."
he paused. I can imagine him checking his wristwatch. "An hour. Papuntang airport."
Mas lalo akong nataranta. Ni hindi ko na naisip na baka nagsisinungaling lang si Tresh. Kasi 'di ba? This always happens in movies!
My mind is pretty foggy. But at the same time, all I can think about is Ike.
I shook my hand, trying to relieve my anxiety.
"Tresh, get your ass back here. Now."
-------
Snippet 2 - Ike's Apartment
*A shot of Gal sleeping soundly in his room after watching the second movie*
"Wake up sleepy head. May dinner pa tayong pupuntahan."
Gal didn't budge. Instead, she hugged the pillow tighter.
"Hoy," he called out again. Still nothing.
The camera focused on her sleeping face for a good minute while Ike continued to stare at her. He gently tucked a few strands of her hair behind her ear.
"Ang cute," he said and gasped when he realized it. "Shit. Don't tell her I said that."
Gal furrowed her brows, disturbed by the noise. The camera then became shaky as a result of Ike's panic.
"Shit!" he whispered.
And then, blackout.
-------
Nagsuot ako ng jacket at kabadong hinintay si Tresh sa labas ng bahay. Ilang minuto na akong naghihintay. Sa sobrang kaba ay pabalik-balik na akong naglalakad.
Ike is flying to CDO soon! What the hell! Bakit ngayon pa?
Napalingon ako sa driveway nang marinig ang busina ng isang kotse. It's Tresh.
I sighed in relief. Sa sobrang pagmamadali ay hindi ko na siya hinayaang lumabas ng kotse. I hurriedly entered his car.
"Drive! Bilis na, Tresh!"
He gave me an annoyed look.
"Chill, Galeley. I'm not driving a fucking ambulance," sabi niya nang magsimulang mag drive. "Where do I drop you off?"
"To Ike's apartment," I replied, drumming my fingers against my lap and nervously looking outside.
"Why?"
"Wala ka na do'n."
He laughed at the hostile tone of my voice.
"Alright, alright. But I am forgiven already, yeah?"
I rolled my eyes at him. Of course! Talagang may kapalit 'tong ginagawa niya!
"Oo na!"
He smirked.
"Good."
A brief silence followed. Hindi 'yon nagtagal dahil nagsalita si Tresh kalaunan.
"You watched the snippets?"
The question made my heart skip a beat. I bit my lip. Marahan akong tumango. He nodded, too. Muli siyang tumahimik bago binasag ulit ang katahimikan.
"That guy's been crazy for you right from the very beginning, Gal. Mahal ka no'n. I know that for a fact," he said ang shrugged. "I'm his bestfriend, after all."
-------
Snippet 3 - Parents' home
*A shot of Gal and Ike's mom browsing the photo album*
"Yanna, do you like her?"
"Yes!" she exclaimed. "I love Moana!"
"I'm not talking about Moana."
"Huh?"
Ike pouts at the cam-corder and Yanna finally understood. She grinned.
"Of course, I like her."
"Why?"
"Why not?" she asked innocently, looking up at his older brother. "I thought you like her too?"
He couldn't answer. A few seconds passed, but he still couldn't.
"What's with the cam-corder?" his mom butt in, noticing that the cam was pointed at her and Galeley.
Ike just laughed.
-------
"Tresh, bilisan mo naman! Wala na bang ibibilis 'to?"
"Malapit na tayo sa downtown. Hindi na 'ko pwedeng lumagpas sa speed limit, ano ka ba?"
I groaned. Oo, malapit na nga kami sa downtown. That's supposed to be a good thing dahil ibig sabihin no'n, malapit na rin kami sa apartment ni Ike. Kaso, nauubusan na rin kami ng oras! I can't calm down at this point!
Halos minu-minuto kong tinitingnan kung anong oras na. Kinakabahan ako. Pero nananaig pa rin ang kagustuhang makita si Ike at sabihin sa kanya ang totoo kong nararamdaman.
Pupunta siyang CDO. Anytime soon, dederetso na siya papuntang airport. Baka wala na 'kong maabutan. Heck I just really need to do this now. I need to let him know how I really feel before he leaves. Kung ipapagpabukas ko pa 'to, baka mawalan na 'ko ng lakas ng loob.
We drove across the flyover. Hanggang ss lumiko papuntang Bajada. More and more, I feel myself getting closer to him. Sana lang nando'n nga siya.
I take a look at my watch and figured we only have fifteen minutes. Oh, God.
"Makakaabot pa kaya tayo?"
I glanced at Tresh expectantly. Nanghihingi ako ng motivational words pero ang gago, kabaliktaran ang sinabi.
"I think we won't be able to make it. Magdasal ka na lang na umabot."
I raised my middle finger at him and he laughed. Kahit mukhang biro lang yung sinabi niya ay nakaapekto pa rin 'yon sa'kin. Kasi pa'no nga kung wala na?
If all this goes to waste, ewan ko na lang.
I gazed outside the window. The afternoon sun was already setting as a train of thoughts occupied my mind.
Ike, stay put. Please. Just wait a little longer.
-------
Snippet 4 - Hilltop
*A shot of Gal admiring the view*
"Maganda ba?" he asked her. She spreaded her arms wide, like a bird spreading its wings.
"Ang ganda!"
The sound of both their laughter were perfect in unison.
"Ang ganda, 'no? I-zoom mo para makita ni Tresh! Baka mainggit 'yon!"
He followed her suggestion, agreeing.
"Yep!" A playful laughter escaped from his lips as he zoomed in the camera to her face.
He'd choose her over the thousand citylights glimmering below them, over and over again. That's for sure.
"This view is very pretty."
-------
"We have reached our destination!" Tresh announces as the engine stopped in the parking lot in front of the building. Akala mo naman Waze app siya.
I exhaled. Ramdam na ramdam ko ang kalabog sa dibdib. Gusto ko sanang paghandaan pa ang lahat ng sasabihin pero kung gagawin ko pa 'yon ay siguradong mauubusan na 'ko ng oras.
Binuksan ko ang pinto at lumabas. But before I entered the lobby, yumuko muna ako para pasalamatan si Tresh.
I gave him a genuine smile. He drove back and forth from the city to my house. I should give him credit for that.
"Thank you, Tresh."
He smiled back.
"Bawi na 'ko, ah?" biro niya bago tumawa. "Now, go and get your guy."
Tumango ako at mabilis na tumakbo patungo sa apartment ni Ike. Good thing the elevator was quick. Agad akong nakapunta sa tamang floor.
I paced down the hallways, the sound of my footsteps echoing along the narrow path. I stopped when I reached his room number. By this time, talagang abot langit na ang kaba ko.
I did my breathing exercise for a few seconds. Ang lamig ng mga kamay ko! Hindi ko alam kung para ba 'to sa posibilidad na nakaalis na siya, o sa posibilidad na makikita ko siya rito.
Huminga ako ng malalim. And then I finally gathered up the courage to knock on his door.
Please, be here.
I waited...
And waited...
And waited some more...
Pero hindi bumukas ang pinto.
Napapikit ako nang mariin.
Fuck. He's already gone.
Hindi ko na naabutan.
I bit my lip, trying to stop myself from crying.
Don't cry. Okay lang 'yan, Gal. You got this.
Pero ang sama pa rin sa feeling. Yung parang nawalan ako ng lakas bigla. Nakakadismaya. Pero kaya pa naman.
I took in a large amount of air and stood traight.
Hihintayin na lang kitang makabalik, Sonja.
I stared hopelessly at his room number for another five seconds until I decided to walk away.
That's when the door burst open. I stopped on my tracks.
"Gal?"
My heartbeat doubled just by hearing his voice. Dahan-dahan akong napabaling sa kanya. And alas, there he is, standing in his sweatpants and dark blue t-shirt. May puting tuwalya na nakasabit sa leeg niya. His hair is wet. Halatang kakaligo niya lang.
Our eyes met and we turned silent. Hindi ko alam kung paano magre-react. Soon enough, the silence became unbearable. I had to speak up. Naglakad ako palapit.
"I-I... thought you're going to CDO?"
I lifted my hand and pointed at his clothes. His brows furrowed.
"CDO?"
"Yes."
I mean, akala ko ba may flight siya? So ba't nakapambahay lang siya? Na-delay ba? Or...
I tried to let it all sink in. 'Di ba, sabi ni Tresh...
Napaawang ang bibig ko habang lito naman akong tiningnan ni Ike.
Sabi ni Tresh.
I scoffed in disbelief when I realized what that asshole did. I even nodded and faked a laugh kahit ramdam ko na ang pamumula ng magkabilang pisngi.
CDO? CDO?! Punyeta, bakit ako naniwala do'n?!
"Ah, haha, so wala talagang flight,"
Tumango-tango din siya, medyo nakangiti pero nalilito pa rin sa'kin.
"Wala talagang conference," pagpapatuloy ko.
Bwiset ka talaga, Tresh Ivan!
Para kaming tanga na tatango-tango lang sa isa't-isa. Habang sa isipan ko naman ay paulit-ulit ko nang sinasakal si Tresh hanggang sa malagutan siya ng hininga.
I so hate him! Ang gago niya talaga!
"Yeah. Nagkukulong lang ako rito these past few days," Ike explained. Tumango ako, hindi na alam kung ano pa ang sasabihin. Nagkatitigan uli kami. Muli nanaman akong nailang!
Shit, ano ba 'to? Last time, sobrang galit ang naramdaman ko para sa kanya. Tapos ngayon, ni kahit anong negatibong emosyon, wala na 'kong maramdaman. Parang... naglaho na lang bigla. Now, I'm totally acting like a shy teenage girl who's about to confess her feelings for her long-time crush. What the heck!
"So... what brings you here?" he asked. Naninimbang ang mga tinging iginagawad niya.
Yumuko ako.
"Uhm..."
I played with my fingertips while biting my lip. I am not good with words. Kahit noon pa man!
Mas lalo lang akong natameme nang humakbang siya palabas sa pintuan. He's now standing a little too close from me. Talagang naaamoy ko pa ang mabango niyang aftershave.
I tried to take my mind off it and cleared my throat.
"Kasi... ano..."
Come on, Galeley. Speak up!
"Uh..."
"Ano?" he said in a low voice, as if he's anticipating what I'm about to say.
Fuck, he's so close. Why does he have to be so close?! Hindi ako makapag-concentrate!
"Sabihin mo sa'kin, Gal," udyok niya. I grew more frustrated as I met his gaze.
"Tsk, pwede bang h'wag na lang akong mag explain?!"
Alright, that was supposed to just stay in my head! I didn't mean to say it out loud.
He chuckled a little. I don't know if it's just me but he really looks so damn good right now. Kinagat niya ang pang-ibabang labi upang pigilan ang nagbabadyang ngiti. He held on to the towel.
"Hindi naman pwede 'yon," aniya. "Gusto kong marinig ang paliwanag mo, Galeley."
I'm aware of how much I look uneasy in front of him. Words aren't my best suit.
"Don't you want me to just go straight to the point?" I suggested. He stared at me with the same intense shade of his eyes before nodding.
"Fine. Go straight to the p-"
"Mahal kita."
Silence reigned for a moment. Natigilan siya ro'n. I went on.
"M-Mahal din kita," I uttered. "Mahal pa rin kita."
Ang pagbanggit lang ng mga salitang 'yon ang kinaya ko. Hanggang do'n lang ang kaya ko. I couldn't elaborate further. I couldn't explain why and how. Ang mahalaga naman ay sigurado ako ro'n sa mga salitang 'yon, 'di ba? At ngayon, ang tanging magagawa ko na lang ay ang maghintay ng sagot niya.
Nanatili lang siyang nakatitig sa'kin. I don't know if that's a bad thing or a good thing. God, this is torture!
I uncomfortably tapped my shoe on the floor while waiting for him to speak. Napatigil ako nang may sumilay na ngiti sa mga labi niya.
"You mean that?"
Huh?
My forehead immediately creased. That was not the answer I was expecting. Nakaka-offend!
"Sa tingin mo talaga hindi ko 'yon-"
I never got to finish my sentence. Because before I could finish it, he has already bent his head down and kissed me.
I was taken by surprise but eventually, I closed my eyes and reciprocated. Agad akong nanghina. I held unto him for support while his arms snaked around my waist to push me more against him. And then his hand travelled up my spine, all the while giving my lip a hot bite.
I can only lose my breath and kiss back in surrender.
Man, I was right. He still has the moves.
My random thoughts made me laugh and smile between our kisses. We then pulled away at the same time, our eyes set at each other's while our noses touched. His breathing was quite heavy.
"I love you," he whispered. "No more 'almost'. Sa pagkakataong 'to, official na tayo."
Natawa ako nang kaunti bago tumango. He gave me a quick peck before I tip-toed to hug him. He hugged me tight and I've never felt more safe. More satisfied.
At last.
"You still have my heart too, Ike Sonja. Now and always."
------
Snippet 5 - Hilltop
*A shot of Gal making her way towards him*
He sighed in hopelessness as his eyes followed her every move.
"Wanna know a secret?"
The camera zoomed in, focusing on Galeley who was then posing a wacky face while looking at the lenses.
He couldn't help but laugh at her quirkiness before blurting out the confession only him could hear.
"That girl over there still has my heart."
~FIN~