"Hey idiots, listen up!"
Eternity probably should have thought of a better introduction to the thorough scolding she was about to give her best friend's extend family. But the words had popped out, so oh well, at least they got everyone's attention. And it wasn't like Eternity cared what they thought of her, they weren't her family.
(Somewhere deep inside, she did care, and she wanted them to be her family, craziness and all. But that was one of the many things she refused to acknowledge, like much of her own feelings. Besides, no matter how much she liked the Wibberlys, it was Lili she was closest to, and Lili she felt it was her duty to defend. Lili would do the same for her, after all.)
Never one to back down, Eternity squared her shoulders and strode over to the head of the table, where Rafe was sitting. She gave the room a once over with her best and most confident death glare, and her confidence grew as she realized silence had fell and all eyes were on her.
Eternity wasn't much of a speaker, but she didn't shrivel in the spotlight either. Her mouth pulled into a tight line, allowing her one more second to collect herself before starting her rant.
"Lili is amazing, but you don't need me to tell you that. You've known her longer than I have, and besides, I'd probably just mess up while trying to describe her. So I'm not gonna waste time on that," Eternity said. Her audience looked rightfully guilty already, though they also didn't seem thrilled about getting yelled at by a sixteen year old two of them had only met today.
"What I am gonna say is; she loves you more than anything. Seriously, she'd do anything for her family, and you can tell when she says that, she means it. You all are her world. And if I had to bet, I'd bet she's probably beating herself up because she thinks you're afraid of her, or that you're going to hate her, and that's one of her worst fears."
"We aren't afraid of Lili," Clare protested.
Michael nodded, "of course not. Her magic is just-"
"Unstable, darkly aligned, incredibly powerful," Eternity finished, her voice biting, "yeah, I know. Reading magic is kinda my thing. But you know what, it comes from her soul, and it's a part of her, so I'll never fear it. Because it's Lili, and Lili would never hurt me. She would definitely never hurt you."
"Yes, but-"
"No, I don't wanna hear it," Eternity snapped, "I know you don't get what she's going through, I mean how could you, you don't live here with her and you haven't gone through it yourself. But you're gonna have to start understanding, like, right now, because she needs that from you. You just betrayed her and now you have to make it right, because being let down by the people who are supposed to love you most has a way of crushing you like nothing else."
"You say that like you know," Richard said softly.
Eternity shrugged, a bit harder than she needed to, "I do know. But this isn't about my problems."
She swung her bare feet up onto the table, leaning back in her chair. She could see Michael fighting the urge to chastise her for it. A very petty part of her was glad that she was annoying him.
"You're right, Eternity. I wish I could take it back," Michael said, "Lili should never have had to hear that."
"It's not about what she heard, Michael," Gabriel chimed in, admonishing the younger man softly, "it's about the fact that you said it."
Eternity shot the warrior ghost a glance of appreciation. He put it a lot better, and more politely than she ever could, especially when she was fired up and feeling betrayed on Lili's behalf (and her own; she thought the Wibberlys were better than this, despite knowing at heart that everyone was destined to let people down in the end).
Or maybe, said a more charitable part of her mind, the part that maybe was starting to believe in promises and hope again, they'll learn from their mistakes. Maybe the pressure got to them once and they would refuse to let it happen again. Maybe the Wibberly family would come out stronger for all of this.
Her inner cynic snorted. That was wishful thinking. And yet, that small optimistic part of her that she could never seem to kill (especially when Lili was there with her belief in love and family and magic bringing it out) refused to relinquish hope.
"Eternity," Wilamena said quietly, guiltily, "I'm sorry."
"Oh, you don't have to tell me that," Eternity said, in her best 'I don't care' voice, the voice that was clearly a hollow lie, one that she refused to acknowledge, "it's Lili you need to talk to."
There was a loud scraping sound as Emma stood from her chair. Eternity's gaze flicked to the woman who had been uncharacteristically silent during all of this, "where are you going?"
"To think," she answered, "apologies have never been my strong suit, and I want to get this one right."
Then she was out the broken hole where the door was, leaving the room in silence. Well, at least until Eternity broke it with a snort, "alright, glad to see my 'you're acting like idiots' lecture had an effect. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna get some yogurt from the fridge."
.......................................
Abby was in the front yard, sitting on the porch, the energy she had gotten from experimenting earlier having faded. Jake was up in their room, recording their (very successful) results in a notebook, and that left Abby to a moment of fending off mosquitos and dealing with her own thoughts.
She heard the front door swing open and recognized the heavy footfalls of Emma's practical, militant style boots. Abby looked up to see a surprisingly serious look on her aunt's face, and while part of her told her it would be kinder to leave the situation alone, her curiosity got the better of her, "is the meeting over already? And was it that bad?"
"Oh. Hey Abby, didn't see you there," Emma said, "and I don't know if the meeting is over or not, I just am trying to get my thoughts together. I'm not the best at apologies, but, this one needs to be good."
Abby frowned, "what happened? Did you get in a screaming match with Uncle Michael again?"
Emma's lips twitched upward, then fell, "do you think I'd be apologizing for that? No, it's- Lili's going through a hard time right now, and instead of respecting that, I said some things that really hurt her feelings."
Abby's frown deepened, "that's not cool."
"No, it's not. Believe me, that has been made clear," Emma said, "but I'll apologize, I just, need to figure out how."
"You'll get there," Abby said mildly, "apologizing is brave, right? Well you're one of the bravest people I know."
"Well, thanks Abby. I have my faults and I make mistakes sometimes, but, I'll do my best to make you proud. Now tell me, what's got you looking all solemn," Emma replied.
Abby sighed, "it's not a big deal, it's just, me and Jake were practicin' magic, and I froze up and couldn't deflect the hex. It turned out fine, but this always happens, I always freeze and it just makes me feel so useless and scared and sometimes I worry I'm nothing but a coward."
Emma's eyes widened. Suddenly, she understood just how hard this was hitting her nieces and nephew, how their lives had been shaken to their foundations. No wonder none of them had faith in themselves, no wonder none of them were ok. How could they, they were basically as young as Emma had been when she discovered magic, and she had definitely not been ok for some time after that.
"Abby, you aren't a coward," Emma tried to be soothing, though it wasn't her strong suit, "you're brilliant, and observant, and resourceful and-"
"And the opposite of brave," Abby said bitterly.
Emma wrinkled her nose, "ok, I know this is a dumb question, cause you're like, way smarter than me, but do you know what brave actually means?"
"Not being so scared you freeze up in the face of any danger," Abby grumbled.
"Not exactly," the warrior replied, "being brave doesn't mean you aren't afraid, it means you face the fears as best you can."
"But I don't know how to face the fears!"
"That can change," Emma reassured her, "being brave isn't something you're born with, it's something you can learn. And last I checked, you were pretty damn good at learning things."
"I guess," Abby mumbled, fiddling with the gold chain around her neck, "Aunt Em?"
"Yeah?"
"How do I learn to be brave?"
Emma paused, "I don't... exactly... have a good answer for that. It just kind of happens as you go."
Abby frowned. This would be so much easier if there were textbooks she could study and a simple test to ace. But real life wasn't a classroom, it was a sea of chaos, one that you had to learn to stay afloat in.
"Look, I don't have much to say, but I guess sometimes feeling strong can give you the confidence you need to be strong. Why do you think I swing my sword around so much?"
Abby snorted, "you think I need a sword?"
"I think your dad would be very mad if I gave you one and let you start messing with it," Emma answered, "so we'll go for something else. Do you still have that toy bow and arrow I gave you for your tenth birthday?"
"Yeah," Abby answered, "how's that gonna help me fight? It's all plastic and rubber."
"It's not meant to help you fight. Holding it is just supposed to make you feel like you can. Here, grab it and I'll show you," Emma encouraged.
Five minutes later the warrior and her niece had one toy bow and five foam arrows, which Emma was encouraging Abby to shoot at the front yard's tree, correcting her stance every now and then.
"I hope I'm not messing this up," she said mildly, "Dena is the better archer, I've always stuck mostly to blades."
"That really inspires my confidence," Abby grumbled, but she had to admit, she at least felt she looked a lot more powerful, even if she was eleven and holding a 'weapon' made of blue plastic.
"Alright, see if you can hit the little hole thingy, right in the middle of the tree," Emma said, pointing to the hollow she was speaking of.
It had been a while since Abby messed around with this toy, since before all this with Robert had begun. So she was a little rusty, she knew that logically. It still didn't stop the sting of disappointment when the foam arrow went way too high and bounced off the bark of the tree.
"Nice job," Emma praised.
"I missed."
"You got close enough," Emma argued, "it's debatable whether or not I would have even hit the tree. Remind me to get Dena to start teaching you the real bow and arrow once you're like, thirteen."
"Thirteen?" Abby asked curiously.
"Yeah, that seems like a good age to start warrior training."
"Aunt Emma, I may not be a coward, but I don't think I'd be a good warrior either," Abby said.
Emma smiled, "Abby, I think you'd be good at whatever you put your mind to. But if for now you want to focus on confidence, well, let's see you hit that tree again."
So that's what she did. And she didn't get the target. But she felt a bit better, and that was something.
.......................................
By the end of the day, Rafe had given everyone the scolding they deserved, apologies had been delt and accepted, a decision had been made about the Countess (they would see what information she had, and then decide if it was worth using or not), and Lili had calmed down enough to stop crying by the time everyone said their tense goodbyes and left. Now she was tucked into her father's side, on the couch, under a fuzzy blanket. Her eyes burned from all the tears she had shed, but no more were falling, and that made her feel slightly less awful.
"Hey," Eternity called, slinging herself into an armchair, "be proud of me. When I gave my lecture to everyone earlier, I managed to not call them dumbasses. I thought about it, but I didn't, and I stuck to calling them idiots."
A twinge of amusement struck a chord in Lili, "thanks for not cursing everyone out."
Eternity grinned, "anything for you."
Lili smiled weakly, and Eternity's expression changed to something softer, "you hanging in there?"
Lili burrowed against her father's side, pulling the blanket in tighter, "eh. I guess. I was really angry at first, now I'm just kind of exhausted. I've forgiven everyone, and that makes me feel lighter, I guess, so now it's just a matter of kinda, I suppose rebuilding myself is the best way to put it."
Rafe tightened his arm around her protectively when he heard how small and timid her voice sounded in comparison to normal. They had finally talked, before the lecture-apology-decision process started, and he had been finally filled in on all Lili was feeling, all that had been going on with her magic and her anger and her fear. It made his heart ache that she was so miserable, but now that she was letting him in, he wanted nothing more then to help.
He looked away from his daughter to see Eternity looking at him with a far heavier gaze then one her age should be forced to carry, "what about you? You good?"
Rafe shrugged, "I haven't quite forgiven everyone yet. I will, soon, but not just yet."
Eternity nodded. That was good for them, she guessed. She didn't quite understand forgiveness (something inside of her, that she refused to examine, like so much of what she felt, was made of anger, and it roared against forgiveness). But if it made them feel better, well, that was all she cared about (she cared about a lot more than that, especially today, when she was proven right - everyone lets those counting on them down). But it was fine, she was fine, she was always fine.
Except she wasn't, and someday she would have to acknowledge that.
Lili couldn't see, not right now, but she normally could, and she knew it was true. Rafe could see, and because he had come to love Eternity like another child, he would be there for her when that someday came. From the dark look in her eyes, the one she would deny with everything in her if her mentioned it, he rather thought it would be soon.
Yes, Rafe would be there for her when that day came, like he would be there for all his children. But for now he would keep an eye on her, and hold Lili close, and hear about the experiment Jake and Abby were so excited to tell him about, and order pizza for dinner so they all ate something, and slowly guide everyone back on track after the chaos that was today.
Not for the first time, not for the last, he thought about that winding road ahead of him and wished Kate was here to face its challenges beside him.
He wasn't the only one wishing things were different. Lili was too, she was wishing that she didn't have such tumultuous power inside, she wished that she knew how to control her anger and her magic. She wished that Robert hadn't come for them, and that her family wasn't breaking under the stress of everything.
And then there was Eternity, who wished everything was different as well. Who wished there was something in this world worth believing in (Lili and Rafe and Kate and Abby and Jake, isn't that worth it?). Who wished there was a universe where she had a chance at home, and family, even though she was certain that universe didn't exist.
After all, if even the Wibberlys, with all their strength and closeness and love, could fall apart, what hope had there ever been for her?
A/N: Abby and Lili (and Jake) are all my babies and I love them, and Rafe is such a good dad. And Eternity is starting to break down and can't ignore her trauma much longer (the next chapter is definitely gonna explore that) and she's so fierce and just wants a family, so like, give her some love. She deserves it.