Healing. Better. Normal.
Three words constantly floating around my mind.
The shooting had taken something from me. Not only my baby and nearly my husband, but my sense of peace and security. And I knew it was going to take a lot to get that back.
Soon enough, I started to feel safer at the hospital, and when I was alone at home. Less jumpy and fearful of things around me.
As much as I hated to admit it, the therapy was helping. Six months since the shooting, I rarely had nightmares anymore despite the fact that I was off the SSRI drugs that had first been prescribed to me.
Today was Derek's birthday. He was working during the day, but I had taken off early to get the house set up for him. No big surprise part or anything, just something romantic for the two of us.
I made sure all my roommates were out of the house for the night. My husband and I would really be alone.
I wasn't one for big romantic gestures. But Derek sure was. He was cheesy, and I remember with a smile building him the house of candles all those years ago.
If he had done something like what I was doing now for me, I would have faked the happiness. I would have said thank you and pretended to love it, but I really didn't like these all out romance things.
His shift ended at 6:00, so he should be here at around 6:30. It was currently 5:00.
I had plans. Big, surprise birthday plans just for the two of us.
First thing I did was clear enough space in the living room enough to set up a small table. I covered it with a silk white tablecloth and set it with the china my mother had left here.
I built a fire and compiled what seemed like every single blanket in the house into a makeshift bed in front of the fireplace, knowing we would make good use of it later.
The balloons. White and gold and silver bunches of them on either side of the fireplace.
It was 5:30. I had to get cooking.
That's right, I said cooking. I pulled out a recipe book, and started to make Baked Lemon Garlic Salmon.
Derek loved fishing, and he loved to eat the fish he caught. So it was only fitting I would cook fish. I had read over this recipe multiple times before I finally started actually making it.
This was terrifying, I was an absolutely horrible cook. I just really wanted to make sure I didn't give the love of my life food poising on his birthday.
So far so good. Salmon was cooking. Now I just had to make sure it was cooked right.
While I waiting, I pulled out the candles. The fire was crackling, which gave off some light, but I placed enough candles around the living room to equal a regular lamp.
Too much?
Too much.
I took a few away, dimming it enough for it to be romantic but not so you couldn't see where you were walking. Perfect.
6:00. Half and hour until he got home. Next step, rose petals. I pulled the fresh petals I had bought earlier out and sprinkled them all over the floor, realizing only after the fact that these were going to be a huge pain in the ass to clean up later.
Whatever. Who cared about later? The timer buzzing for the salmon alerted me it was done, and I rushed into the kitchen to test it.
It looked good, and the mouthwatering smell almost made me want to eat it right then and there. The sides were done as well.
6:15.
I looked around the house, realizing the only thing I had left to do was get myself ready. Derek wore suits to the hospital when not in scrubs. He would be looking good when he got home, so I had to match him.
I sifted through my closet, trying to find something fitting. I laughed out loud when I found it. The perfect dress. I slipped the silky material on, rushing to brush on a little bit of makeup, only to realize I didn't have enough time to do something to my hair.
I sighed, pulling it out of the bun and watching my golden locks pool just past my shoulders.My hair was naturally wavy, I wasn't a fan of it, but there wasn't really anything I could do.
So I fluffed it out, trying to make it look a bit better, before hearing a car pull up in the driveway. I ran downstairs double checking everything was ready.
Candles lit, table set, bed made, fire going, dinner ready. Okay. Here we go. I smoothed out myself one last time and stood in the foyer, surrounded by the candles that made my skin and dress glow.
Anxiety rose up in me as I heard the door start to open. What if he hated it? It was too late to do anything about it now.
Derek walked into the house, shutting the door behind him and taking in the setup, clearly confused.
"Hey," I greeted softly.
The confusion in his gaze was replaced with passion and desire when he saw me, and a classic McDreamy smile spread across his face.
"Hey," he responded, dropping his bag, "what's all this?"
"It's your birthday!"
"I must have forgotten," His gaze sparkled with amusement, then he narrowed his eyes, studying my dress.
"Oh my god," He finally realized. "Is that...?"
I nodded, unable to hold back my giggle.
"The prom dress? The dress you wore to the prom all those years ago?" Somehow, his smile grew.
"It is! It is!" I laughed.
I wore the silky, glimmering, long black dress I had worn to the prom the hospital had hosted--where we had hooked up in an exam room. He stepped towards me and pulled me in for a long kiss, which I accepted, only to pull away after and grab his hand.
"Save that for later," I promised in a whisper.
His eyes twinkled as I led him into the living room, and the shock on his face was evident when he saw what I had done. I held my breath. Did he love it or hate it?
"Meredith," he started softly, taking it all in.
"Oh god, you hate it. I knew it was too much. I'm sorry, I went so overboard, I can probably lose the balloons and get rid of the candles. God, I shouldn't have-"
"Meredith," He cut me off, looking into my eyes, "It's absolutely incredible. I love it."
"You do?"
"This is amazing. You are amazing," He laughed, and in one sweeping motion I was in his arms and we were kissing.
Reluctantly, I pulled away. "Wait, wait. That's not all. I have one last surprise,"
"Oh?"
I pulled out a chair for him at the table, gesturing for him to have a seat.
"Isn't that my role?" He smirked as he sat down.
"Shut up. It's your birthday," I retorted.
I went into the kitchen coming back out holding the two plates of salmon in my hands, and I sat his down in front of him, waiting for his reaction.
"I cooked," I said giddily.
"Y-you cooked," He stuttered, the looked up at me with feigned shock, "And you didn't burn the house down? I'm not going to get food poising?"
I tried to pout, but the grin on his face caused one to appear on mine as well.
"I followed the recipe book exactly," I clarified, grabbing a bottle of his favorite wine out of the kitchen and pouring us both a glass.
I sat down, watching my husband try the food I had cooked, holding my breath, hoping it tasted good. My face lit up when he smiled.
"This is delicious Mer," He said with his mouth full.
"Really? Oh thank god," I was relieved, and tried my own.
I was shocked. The food actually tasted good. Not like an okay good, but like a delicious good. A make it and eat it everyday good.
I talk and ate and drank wine in the candlelight with my husband for about an hour, and we had both finished when I noticed the fire was dying.
"Hang on," I excused myself, moving to add a block of wood and try to get the flames back up again.
When I finally did, I kicked off my shoes and stood on the bed of blankets I had made, watching the flames.
I felt a warm body behind me, and I leaned into my husband who wrapped his arms around my waist, resting his head on my shoulder.
"I believe you promised me one last thing tonight..." He whispered, putting light kisses down my neck and shoulders.
"Did I? I must have forgotten. Could you remind me?" I whispered back, turning to face him.
Those bright blue eyes had darkened suddenly with lust, and I was sure mine mirrored his.
"I would have to get you out of that dress first, even though I really do love it,"
"And that blazer," I started pulling at his jacket, "You must be hot and uncomfortable,"
"I've never been more comfortable," He assured me.
And then my husband and I enjoyed some amazing, dirty, hot, hot birthday sex. It was really, really great sex. I mean, usually the sex was great, but tonight something was different, somehow it was even better.
His scar didn't bother me anymore. Now when I looked at it, felt it, it just reminded me of how lucky I was to be here with my husband. How lucky I was that he had lived. We got another chance. And I was going to take full advantage of it.
We laid together in the blanket bed, soaking up the warmth of the fire and the happiness we both shared in the moment.
Derek rolled onto his side, propping himself up on his elbow so he could look at me.
"Thank you. Meredith, really. I was not expecting anything and this...this was amazing. Thank you so much,"
"Aw, it's your birthday, you didn't think I was going to do nothing did you?"
He flashed me a smile, that damn McDreamy smile I couldn't resist. I leaned forward and kissed him.
"I love you," I said between the kisses.
"And I love you,"
Author's Note:
That's it! I really hope you enjoyed reading. Comment what you think, I'd love the feedback. Please check out the other books I've written, Family has been completed and I'm currently working on a collection of mostly MerDer One-Shots and a Calzona AU. Thank you!!