/ 𝕮𝖎𝖓𝖈𝖔 /
VIVI
Someone is poking my cheek.
The moment someone regains his consciousness, the first instinct is to open their eyes and let it wonder through their surroundings to gain an insight of where they are. But I didn't do that yet, you see. Pinakiramdaman ko muna ang kapaligiran ko. Malamig, subalit sobrang comfortable. Where could I be? Heaven?
Like I will.
I feel a fully soft and fluffy blanket wrapped around me on a comfy bed, and I'm sure angels aren't that hospitable unless you're the real goody-shoes. I'm probably in the waiting room, waiting to be interviewed if I really do deserve to go in heaven.
Kidding aside, had heaven always smelt like this? The smell of the room calms my nerves, relieving all sort of stressors. I secretly inhaled lots of its scent. It's like roses dripped in water beneath the rising sun. How refreshing.
POKE!
And... and I'm sure angels just don't randomly poke you on your cheek, right?
WHOOSH!
He's now blowing it?!
"Wake up, pretty!"
I recognize that voice.
Sinubukan kong magmulat ng mata subalit nagsisi rin agad ako. Agad ko iyun sinara nang matamaan ito ng nagbabadyang liwanag mula sa kisame. Grabe! Kahit gaano ka pa ka-demonyo, para ka nang papunta sa langit dahil sa sobrang liwanag!
An ecstatic gasp appeared beside me. "You're awake! I saw it! You opened your eyes!" nasasabik na turan nito.
"J-Johan, patayin mo ilaw." nakangiwi kong pakiusap sa kanya.
"Okay po!" sabik niyang sagot at ramdam ko ang pagluwag ng kama dahil sa pagalis ng pagkakadagan niya rito kasabay ng mabilis nitong pagpadyak patakbo palayo sa akin para patayin ang ilaw. Ilang segundo lang ang namayani at ramdam kong napatay niya na nga ito dahil bahagyang dumilim ang paligid.
"Much better," I said in relief and slowly opened my eyes again. Hoo, so I'm really not dead! Napangiti ako at tinginan si Johan.
"Salamat, ha—OOF!"
Hindi na nga ako nasisilaw, pero ang kapalit naman nun ay ang pagkakapos ko ng hininga! I knew something disastrous would happen as soon as I started hearing loud thuds on the floor coming from my side, and the moment I directed my eyes to Johan, he swiftly attacked me with a huge jump and gave a very tight hug, almost squeezing me actually, as he went on top of me.
"I miss you~! I really do!" he happily stated while rubbing his cheek against mine, giggling. Napangiwi nalang ako sa akto nito dahil kahit kailan, hindi pa rin siya nagbabago.
"Johan, i-kalma mo. Mapapatay mo na ako," I jokingly blurted out, though it may not be a joke, who knows, all I know is that his hug is too tight, I'd want myself free from it.
Ramdam ko ang pagtigil ng katawan niya, tila nanigas sa narinig. Before realizing it, he immediately let me go from his embrace and stared at me with trembling eyes like he was about to cry. And that's when I knew I made a huge mistake.
"N-no! No! I wouldn't do that, professor! I would never kill you po! I am so sorry! I... I just wanna hug you cause—sniff—I really miss you! It's never my intention!" Johan's voice cracked and tears from his eyes fell. He's crying. Sweat formed on my head regardless of the cold atmosphere that surrounds us in this room. I am now secretly panicking inside for I worry how to soothe this child.
Although Johan is a very huge, tall, and well-physiqued man, he is actually one big of a cry baby freak who cries in the littlest of things and easily misunderstands words which leads to the point that telling jokes to him can be quite dangerous for he takes them too seriously for his own good. Trust me when I say I still can't comprehend the fact that he's a college student already. Heck, even a high schooler doesn't act like this! I think no one acts like this! I'd say he's like a child trapped in an adult's body. He gets offended easily and throws a tantrum whenever he doesn't get what he wants.
In short, he's a brat.
Napabuntong hininga ako. "Hey, Johan listen. Nagbibiro lang ako, okay? I won't die, kalmahan mo." pagpapaliwanag ko at bahagyang ngumiti. He stared at me and gave an angry pout.
Natuwa ako. Para siyang rabbit.
"I don't like that joke..." ayan na, nagmamaktol na.
"Learn to take jokes, boy." natatawa kong katwiran at ginulo ang buhok niya na naging dahilan para ikamula ng magkabila nitong pisngi kasabay ng pagguhit ng isang ngisi sa kanyang nanginginig na labi, pinipigilang mapangiti nang tuluyan.
Napasandal na lamang ako sa headboard ng kama dahil masyadong nang nangangawit ang aking likuran mula sa pagkakahiga. Johan immediately went to me as I did that and wrapped his hands all over me, but unlike earlier, his hug was not the type to squeeze the life out of me. It is still tight in a way where I think it's impossible to get out of if he doesn't want to. Ugh, this childish freak. He then sumdged himself closer to my body that made me feel a little strange.
Sumandal siya sa akin dibdib at inosenteng tiningala ako.
"Professed, I adore you. Very much..." he whispered.
My heart fluttered a little. "G-ganun ba? Thank you, Johan. I really appreciate it. Me too." sagot ko habang nagkakautal-utal dahil masyado ata akong nabigla sa sinabi niya at hindi alam kung papaano siya tutugunin. It may be an act of exaggeration, but words like that really hit hard on me. An unusual impact, I must say.
Children from the elementary schools I had taught said they love me to the moon and back, which is sweet and always made me feel euphoric for teaching children has always been one of my passion. Then high school came and my real career began as a lecturer at that time. Those high school students said I was a great teacher, and they'd love it if I were to teach them until the end of their senior year. I would have also if I had the choice. But time went on as compliments kept getting bigger, and I shifted my engagement in college affairs. The students I handled in college were no different from the others I had. They kept saying I was one of a kind because professors are always deemed as scary, but I wasn't one bit scary at all—according to them. I remember becoming pissed at it and them laughing about it. God, what a reminisce. But looking back at all of them, they're all special statements, really. And I do and still appreciate them from the bottom of my heart up until today.
Sana makita ko muli sila.
So right now where one of my student said they adore me, it was nice to hear; a soft melody to the heart.
"Does that mean professor adores us too?" tanong sa akin ni Johan habang nakatingala pa rin.
Mabilis akong tumango. "Of course I do! That can never change."
Kumibot ang labi niya. He averted his eyes and bowed his head to hide his face and slowly let out a chuckle.
Napalunok ako nang nagsitaasan lahat ng balahibo ko sa batok dahil sa mahina niyang paghalakhak.
"It's such a shame that we haven't met you much earlier. By the professor, there is a question that lingers in my mind..." tumingala na muli ang ulo niya sa akin at hindi ko mapigilang magtaka nang pulang-pula ang mukha niya ngayon. His cheeks were red for sure earlier, but what happened now? Why's his face all red so suddenly?
"... may I ask who Miss Patricia is to you?"
My heart thumped differently upon hearing that name. Napaiwas ako ng tingin.
"O-oh, si Miss Patricia. Well, she's someone... uh... she's a professor here if I'm not mistaken. H-how come you don't know her? She's always with Mr. Wittgen, our dean, right? She, uh, she's... we met one time... and that's about it," sagot ko habang ramdam na namumula ang magkabila kong pisngi. Damn it, whatever!
It's Johan who's seeing this anyway. With his child-like personality, I'm pretty sure nothing could go wrong.
"Do you like her?"
"W-what?! NO!" I shouted defensively. Shit, that was too obvious. Johan won't mind, would he? What can I do?! I was basically startled! "I mean, I like her as... as a friend... and we've met only once. S-so How could I... like her already?" pahina nang pahina ang boses ko dahil unti-unti kong naaalala ang ngiti ni Miss Patricia sa aking isipan. That was few months ago but the image of such beauty was as vivid as the vibrant sky I passed by everyday. It was really beautiful, oh God. Natahimik nalang ako dahil baka kung ano pang masabi ko.
Ramdamam kong unti-unting lumuwag ang yakap sa akin ni Johan kaya napatingin ako sa kanya. Unfortunately, he turned his face away from mine before I can see his reaction.
"Is that so?" he mumbled with a low voice, it almost sounded like he was suppressing his fury. Fury about what exactly?
Even though Johan is extremely sensitive to almost everything he finds upsetting, I have never seen him mad before, not even once!
Holding that fact, I don't know how he deals with anger.
Would it be like a child who'll shout and cry and throw anything he sees like a damn brat? Oh, that's troubling!
"Johan, are you mad, why are you sulking?" medyo nag-aalala kong tanong.
"No. . ." matamlay nitong sagot sa akin. Huminga siya nang napakalalim bago tumayo mula sa higaan na ikinaalis ng pagkakasandal ko sa headboard ng kama. "How could I ever be mad at you, professor?"
"Saan ka pupunta—"
Something snapped inside of me. A memory that made me realize something from the conversation that sparked.
Tinignan ko ang paligid habang nanlalaki ang mata.
Mabilis akong tumayo sa kama at pumunta sa harap ni Johan bago pa siya maka-alis. "W-wait a minute! Aalis ka ba? Aasan pala tayo? Oh God, Johan, I forgot to ask! I remember losing consciousness because something hit me. Paano ako napunta rito?"
Johan just stared at me with a frowning face which I have never seen him done before. It was crumpled and deeply compressed as if it was severely agitated about something that made me feel like something's not right about him. Strangely, however, it went back to normal as soon as he noticed I'm staring at him and decided to give me his smile. Odd.
"Oh~! About that?" tumawa siya. "You're in my dorm, professor! I'm sorry I had to take you in here. By the way..." lumapit siya sa akin at binulong ang nangyari kanina kasabay ng pangalan ng estudyanteng tumama sa aking ulo. Nang marinig ko iyun, nahigit ko ang aking hininga.
He hit me?
***
I am now in my office, sitting on my chair as both of my elbows sat on the table with my fingers crossed. Hindi mawala ang sinabi sa akin ni Johan kanina sa isipan ko kaya nung lumabas na kami sa kanyang dormitoryo sa west wing ng unibersidad na 'to, we went on separate ways, and that's when I decided to call for his presence in my office. I know I need to have a word with him privately.
If I'll be frank, I am quite furious right now.
Why did he do such thing to me? Was he the one who lifted me up too? I'm pretty sure I heard other voices as well, but they were all too vague to be recognized. I should have asked Johan some more questions earlier, but I guess that's already too late. I'll just hear everything from him.
"Professor, you called for me?"
The man I have been waiting for knocked on the door. I sighed. Finally, err, maybe not.
"Pasok ka."
The door opened as soon as I gave my word and revealed a huge man in uniform wearing a stern face with his straight-lined lips that has once never smiled at me. I knew he was quite a heartless fellow, but did he really have to do that to me? He doesn't like me, but I'm pretty sure he doesn't hate me either. So why? Has he been hiding his hatred towards me all these months? Looking at him right now, I feel like I might be the one hating him. Ah, I should probably shut up for a moment. Let's hear his explanation first before setting our feelings aside.
"Good afternoon." malamig na bati nito.
"Yes, take a seat." mahinhing utos ko na agad naman niyang sinunod. He closed the door behind him and went towards the chair in front of me to sit on. Nang maka-upo siya, bahagya akong napatikhim.
"I'm pretty sure you know why you're here. . . Travis." I said in utter disappointment.
"Yes." matipid nitong sagot at tinitigan pa talaga ako gamit ang malalalmig nitong mata, halatang walang paki-alam. Hoo! Wag kang manununtok, Vivi. Kahit walang pake sayo ang estudyante mo, wag kang magdra-drama.
"You have nothing to say? Anything at all?" paghabol ko habang pinipigilan ang lungkot na gustong kumawala sa aking bunganga.
I was angry about it when I discovered what he did, but looking at his expressionless face as it gaze deep at mine right now, the anger I have clutched onto suddenly vanished into thin air and was replaced by the sorrowful fact that this student doesn't harbor any concern towards anything. I am worried for he might hurt other people in the future.
A moment of silence took place between us as I wait like a damn idiot for his response, or a simple apology even! Pero mukhang kahit gaano katagal ata ako maghihintay, wala talaga siyang nais magsalita at mananatiling nakatitig lamang sa akin na tila balak pang gawin hanggang mawalan kaming dalawa ng mata.
Urgh. Ano, magtititigan nalang kami rito? Grabe, hindi ba siya nagsasawa sa mukha ko? Ako kasi, sawang-sawa na sa kanya kahit gaano pa siya ka-guwapo. 'Di, joke.
"Travis, listen, what you did, I need you to tell me why, or—"
Naputol ang pagsasalita ko nang biglang bumukas ang maliit na telebisyon na nakasabit sa gilid ng aking opisina at nagpakita ng labing-limang (15) segundo sa screen na umaakto bilang countdown ngayon.
Napakunot ang noo ko. Not that it's unusual for it to suddenly open on its own, I know this university has its own specialities when it comes to technology, but the purpose of the small televisions in each professor's office is for announcements and emergency broadcast. And Mr. Armani, the Dean, did not inform us about any announcement that shall be held today because usually, we would hold a meeting and create them before letting the whole university knows about it. So what's this about?
3
2
1
When the countdown reached to 0, the screen turned black. I just stared at it, waiting with a confused face.
"Mmn."
What was that?
Mas lalong kumunot ang noo ko nang biglang may nag-play ng isang video, and from what I can see, the place is tinted with red candles and smokes? Either way, it's enough to see where the setting of the video is: on a large bed. I see many silhouettes of men and... one woman? I squinted my eyes to try and analyze what's really going on in this video when I suddenly heard something.
"Augh! Mn!"
My body froze.
That was. . . a moan... from a woman.
After hearing that, I knew what kind of video is being played on our television—and it was not a nice one.
Napatayo ako sa gulat. "I'm sorry, Travis, but I need to—"
"Augh! Fuck, please! Please! Please! Let me cum!"
"I'm losing it! I am at my limits! Please, let me. Have mercy on me!"
"Ah! Ah!"
Napalunok ako nang mas lalong lumakas ang audio ng video. It was so loud, full of begging and moaning of the woman with the bed creaking so hard from the intense movements I am watching. It made my feet stuck on the floor, completely bewildered by the things I am hearing. I didn't wanna look at it because it was too much for me. I feel like I am gonna puke everything I ate for breakfast and pass out from nausea.
"Ugh! Fuck, so tight!"
"Let's make you loose, yeah?"
Nanlamig ako sa mga naririnig ko. There were many voices of men that was present in the video, but I could only hear one woman's voice. And it strangely sounds familiar. Oh, God. Is this because I haven't been watching porn lately? I mentally slapped myself from those ill-mannered thoughts. Shit, how could I? Someone is literally getting gang-banged in live broadcast and if my little television is open, I'm sure so is the main television in Hangkuk University, and this video is being showcased in the entire university.
My thoughts were needless and proved I was being an asshole. I must put an end to this immediately—
"Wh-what?" I mumbled when my eyes set its sight on the screen that got brighter from the lighter one of the men has opened to light his cigarette while continuously fucking the girl. My heart started beating furiously out of chain reaction.
N-no.
No. It can't be.
Please.
"M-miss Patricia?" nangilid ang luha ko mula sa aking nakikita.
I can clearly see Miss Patricia's face on the video. She was naked and looked tired while being humped by those different men that keep touching her body that kept shaking while having those... toys... inside her.
No.
H-how could they?
How dare them?!
Nandilim ang paningin ko. Padabog kong kinuha ang aking cellphone at aalis na sana kung hindi lamang ako nakarinig ng isang boses.
"Don't."
I looked at Travis when he suddenly spoke. His new reaction surprised me.
Like what I've said about him before... he never once smiled at me... even the littlest of bit.
So why is his lips smiling from ear to ear at me right now?
"This. . ." nawala agad ang pinakita niyang ngiti at napalitan nang mala-demonyong ngisi. ". . . is my response."
—————
cupofteaspilled.