Chapter 29: Did Not See That Coming!
D-day has arrived. This afternoon I have a meeting with Child Services about Percy. I'm not going to lie, I'm scared of what they're going to tell me. I'm scared that all they're going to see is the fact that most of my family is in a motorcycle gang and the father of all three of my kids went to prison more than once. I'm scared they're going to take my boys away from me.
I sighed softly to myself and shuffled through the mail. I never knew being a single parent was going to be this financially difficult. I'm barely getting by and by barely, at the end of the month when I pay the monthly bills, I have just enough to get a few groceries. I can't afford to send Percy on a field trip coming up, he's been excited about this trip since they found out they were going at the beginning of the year. Theyre going to Redwood city to see a production of Jack and the Beanstalk. Now he's upset that he can't go because I can't afford it.
My attention was drawn to a shrieking giggle come from Daylon's room. I tossed the stack of mail onto the coffee table and waddled down the hallway to Daylon's bedroom. Daylon's was standing on his knees leaning against the bars of the crib with a wide smile that showed the teeth that have come in already. I walked by him and opened the Thomas the train curtains to let in some sunlight. He giggled and squealed when I leaned over the crib and picked the little boy up. His leg draped over the bump in the dark grey graphic tee shirt while the other was loosely swaying against the small of my back. It was getting more and more difficult to pick him up to carry him; and it was getting painful. The baby did not like it when I picked up her ever growing brother.
I took Daylon into the living room and put up the baby gate so he was contained in this living room only. I set him down amongst his toys and went back to flipping through the mail. It was hard not being able to talk out loud to someone to see what we need to cut back on or how much money we need to spend. Juice was the main provider of this family, his income was only a couple hundred dollars more than mine but it made a huge difference. Now that I'm flipping through the mail and seeing these bills in comparison to what I make in a month; I feel like crying.
Daylon's happily crawled on the floor, babbling nonsense to me as if we were having an actual conversation in his own made up language. He crawled away from where I had parked myself on the couch in front of the pile of bills. I sighed and leaned back tiredly, watching the little boy in a blue sleeper crawl around on the floor with his shaggy dark brown hair hanging in his face in messy rings. He had somehow found a soother amongst his toys and plugged it between his lips. He looked at me with an immature reflection of his father's face. His dark eyes brightened into a heavenly color of chocolate brown. His Puerto Rican colored cheeks rounded into small apples on his cheekbones and his baby pink lips peeked out from either side of the pacifier. It amazes me to think he has no idea that today might be his last day with me if Child Services deems me unfit to be a mother. He's just happy to be sitting on the floor looking at me and crashing his Tonka trucks together playfully.
I heard my phone vibrate from across the room where it was plugged in charging. I'm sure it was Gemma texting me to say she was going to pick Abel up from kindergarten then she'll be on her way over. Gemma was coming over with Thomas and Abel to watch on Daylon while I'm gone. Since Daylon and Thomas are closer in age they have a ball with each other. Percy and Abel are further apart in age; Percy is 7 and Abel is 5. Percy likes doing puzzles and cars while Abel likes cars but isn't as serious about it as Percy is. Percy and Daylon go to the same School but they're obviously in different grades.
I'm sure Jax wants the boys to act like brothers. When Percy was 5 Jax put the idea that since him and Abel are brothers that makes Jax his other daddy and Tara was his other mommy, and he went around telling people he had two daddies and two mommies. People thought we were crazier than we already were. Jax had to clear that up for Percy because he's the one who made that mess.
My stomach fluttered with movement when Jax came to mind. My hand automatically curved around the ever growing bump in the tee shirt. I think she's reminding me of what Jax has done to the family I worked hard to build. Based off of the letters and journal entries I've read, he destroyed Juice. He pushed and pushed, and pushed until he was pushed into a hole in the ground.
I was snapped out of thought when the front door opened and two little boys walked in with smiles and happy greetings. Abel came over and gave me a hug before joining his little brother and cousin to play with the toys. Gemma came in with Abel's school bag at hand and her purse hung over her forearm while there was a casserole dish with tinfoil over the top in her hand. Even after I told her not to do anything for us, she still did. I know we're struggling but I am able to make dinner for my kids, I don't need her to make us frozen meals to put in the freezer so we can heat them up at any time. She set it down Iin the kitchen then came back. She smiled at me as she removed her sunglasses.
"Hey deary, how is everything?" She asked in a mothering way. I grunted and heaved as I rose to me sore feet.
"Everything is overwhelming." I admitted flatly. Gemma frowned at me and stroked the stray hairs from my face kindly and placed her hand on my cheek.
"Don't worry, hun. Everything will go well today." She encouraged me with a faked smile. I jerked my head in a small nod before bypassing her to go to my bedroom to get ready for this meeting that happens in an hour. I wasn't ready to hear that I was unsuitable to be a mother. I wasn't ready to have my boys taken away from me. I wasn't ready to be deemed unfit for motherhood. But I couldn't stop thinking about what Tara told me the other night. She told me Percy was a suicide risk; that really hit hard for me. I didn't see the signs, as far as I knew there were no signs and he was just a sad little boy who lost his father after a traumatic event.
"I heard from a little birdie that your Uncles are planning on getting the Mayans to come after the club for what happened to your dad." Gemma startled me with that news. I pulled the powder blue blouse over my shoulder and started to button it up over the noticeable bump in my skin. I had already pulled on a pair of my maternity dress pants.
"Who told you this?" I asked the only question that popped into my head at the moment. Gemma shrugged her shoulders with her arms crossed over her chest, she stood in the doorway.
"Doesn't matter. You need to go stop them from getting not only the rest of your family killed but also themselves. Enough blood has been spilled because of your father's actions." Gemma told me bluntly. My eyebrows fell together a bit as I looked at her weird.
"Why can't Jax go stop them?" I muttered lowly. Gemma frowned at me and shook her head slightly.
"Because he's the one who told me to convince you to do this. He can't get your uncles to call it off but maybe you can." She announced blatantly with a concerned and unnerved look painting her features with the truth. She didn't want me to do this but Jax did, and the Prince always gets what he wants.
I sighed saddened and thought about it briefly, looking down at the baby bump in my shirt. My eyes went back to meet Gemma's and I shook my head.
"I can't. I can't risk putting my unborn child in danger like that. That's too much for Jax to ask for." I replied flatly and watched as Gemma's hope ran from her eyes. I know its the right thing to do, I'm not risking putting my baby's life in danger because Jax can't get someone to do what he wants. I've lost too much because to him already, I'm not about to lose my unborn child too.