Chapter 48 – The Bullshit Never Ends
Beyoncé Knowles | October 10th 2020 | Hamptons, NY
For the past few days have been the most relaxed and happy I've felt in a long time. I'm officially a single woman and I couldn't help but feel like a bird set free from a cage. I've been with one man for most of my life and now I am single I can honestly say I wasn't even in a marriage. It was more like a business deal went bad. Either way, I am finally out and doing my own thing. I haven't told anyone as yet but I was planning to do so once I make my pregnancy announcement. When I hit the six or seven month mark I'll inform whoever needs to know but right now I'm going to indulge in the moment.
I walked through my home in nothing but a weed red silk dress and a matching robe. My hair has been in its natural curly stage and I had on minimal to no makeup. I was feeling my sexiest and nothing could pull me out of my high. I really wish I could have a glass of wine right now but we know how that is going. I connected my Spotify playlist to my home stereo and Chris' Party started blaring through my house. I placed my iPad down on my kitchen counter then pulled out my fruit platter from the fridge just as my phone started to ring.
I quickly answered seeing Chris' face spread across my display.
"Buzz me in." He hung up and I rolled my eyes. "Amma get his ass back for that." I mumbled pressing the button for the gate. I watched from the front door seeing his Porsche pulling into the driveway then an silver SUV rolled in behind of him. I raised my eyebrows as to who that could be.
I walked down the bottom of the steps to meet Chris. He got out of his car with three bags in his hand and a backpack in the other. He walked towards me with an everlasting smile on his face.
"Damn you look good pregnant." He managed to give me a hug with the load in his hands. I inhaled his intoxicating scent and felt my knees go weak. I fought the moan that tried its best to escape my mouth then I pulled away from him.
"Thanks." I moved my hair behind my air feeling small. I caught myself blushing under his stare. I looked up and I giggled mushing his head away from me. "I hate you soooo much Christopher." He just laughed while kissing my cheek then moving into the house.
Behind him stood my mother with her arms folded across her chest. i just stared at her while her eyes travelled behind Chris as he walked into the house.
"I didn't know he was gonna be here Beyoncé." She finally approached me and once I felt her energy I knew this was going to be one of those moments. "I didn't know you was gon' be here either but you're here aren't you?" I sipped my imaginary tea in my head then turned around.
"You coming in or what?" I walked up the stairs in my black 6 inch heels.
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I danced around my kitchen while eating my pineapple slices dipped into a salty caramel sauce. It was one of my cravings and I was finally able to have some. I heard walking and I looked up seeing Chris walking with his phone in hand and more bags. I raised my eyebrow in curiosity as to what would be in there. They weren't marked with any logo so I had no clue what he was hiding.
"What's in the bag?" I asked moving closer to him with a pineapple slice in my hand. "I know you been craving some spice so I made some hot wings." He opened the bag and pulled out three large containers. "I also got some greens and cornbread." He opened the container and my mouth watered just by the sight and smell.
"Boy I knew you was country as hell but not this country." I took the container and fork and sat at the small table in the kitchen. "Put my fruits back in the fridge please?" I spoke with my mouth filled with food. I moaned and felt the Holy Spirit in my soul. This food was sanctified and divine to my body. Can I get an Amen?
"I never knew you could cook." I did a little shimmy as I continued to eat. "I may got money but some things I wanna do for myself." He sat in front of me sipping on a bottle of water and a watermelon wedge in his hand.
"Wassup with your mom? I knew since the hospital a few months ago she been kinda cold to a nigga. I know I ain't do nothing to nobody but damn." I rolled my eyes thinking back to the many conversations I've had with her.
"She thinks you're the reason Shawn and I are splitting and also thinks you're a bad influence on me and Blue just by the different situations you be in and your music. She strongly believes that I should give him another chance and apologize for my wrong doings in the marriage which is bullshit but it's whatever at this point. I'm happy." I informed him taking a bite of the collard greens. My eyes started to water by how good it tasted. "Damn you can cook." I mumbled looking up at him. He had his bottom lip between his teeth and his eyebrows was forrowed together in focus on God knows what.
"When was the last time your mother asked if you was good?" I stopped chewing my food to really think of that question.
I haven't had a heart felt conversation with either of parents when they found out that I had a history with Chris. They blame him for the marital problems Shawn and I have been going through and when I would try to justify why I did certain things they would tell me I was in the wrong and that I should be the one apologizing to Shawn and making the effort to put my marriage back together. So with that being said I stopped asking my parents for advice and handle my shit on my own. They weren't looking for my best interest and that hurts me. I'm your child, no matter what I go through in my personal life don't let that cloud your judgement to be there for me.
Before I knew it, I was wiping my eyes of tears. I heard Chris sighed as he returned to the table with a napkin and I took it from him. "Fucking hormones." I mumbled then released a deep breathe.
"Amma be back."
Christopher Brown | Hamptons, NY
I walked through Beyoncé's home until I got to the back yard where her mother was sitting around the pool on a lounge chair. I walked towards her and she looked back probably hearing my feet crushing the grass. I sat on the chair to her and she completely ignored me.
I had already decided on what I was going to say whether she liked it or not. Her daughter is carrying my child and no one is gonna stress her out any more than she needs to be. She's already got enough on her plate and I don't appreciate them popping up whenever they feel like thinking their entitled opinions are worth it when they can't even support their child in her personal journey.
"So you got my daughter pregnant." She looked at me through the lenses of her glasses. "What's your motive with her?" I completely ignored her question. I don't know if she wanted a specific reaction out of me or was she implying that I was only here to make her life harder but I'm going to dead that shit right now.
"Look, I just wanna make sure we're on the same page after this." I sat closer resting my elbows on my thighs. "That woman in there has been through hell multiple times with a man y'all have been pushing her to stay with for years and I bet not even once y'all actually sat down and asked her if she was mentally or emotionally okay." She looked taken back but I don't give a fuck.
"I don't care what the hell y'all may think of me at the end of the day but what y'all not gon' do is sit here and write me to look like I'm ruining lives when that's not the case. That's your daughter and you should've been by her side most out of anybody because she's going through the same shit you went through with Mathew. Now I don't know the lengths of y'all relationship but when this baby gets here, unless this shit y'all got going on is fixed and resolved, no one will be allowed around our child and I'm deadass about it." With that I got up from in front of her and walked back to the side door of the house. I looked up seeing Beyoncé standing by the room with a hand on her bump and a nervous look on her face.
"C'mon let's go lay down." I wrapped my hand around her back then swooped her off her feet. I carried her bridal style up the stairs and to her room where I laid her on the bed. I took off her robe and her heels.
She moved up to the headboard and patted the empty spot next to her. I kicked off my Jordan's and took off my shirt leaving me in my shorts and tank. I got into the bed behind of her she rested her head on my chest and my hand immediately went to her bump.
I felt the baby kicking and I started to smile. She placed her hands on top of mine and the baby was kicking even more.
"Lemme record this man! This shit is hype as hell!" I excitedly reached in my pocket and pulled out my phone. I slide my camera open and position it at Bey's belly. He started to kick and I could see his small feel printing through her dress.
"He only does this whenever you're around." She pouted and I brought the camera in her face. "That's 'cause he knows wassup." She giggled pushing the phone from out of her face. I saved the video then placed my phone on the night stand.
"So what did you and my talk about?" She asked finally. "I just told her what you should've told her a long ass time ago. I know you said she was all concerned when the video of you and ole boy got out but that's the last I've ever heard of her concern for you. Your parents seem very wishy-washy and that ain't right with me." I rubbed her bump feeling her body weight get heavier on my left half.
"I also told her unless she can stop being an ass kisser she's not seeing the baby unless it gets resolved." She leaned off of my chest then turned to me with a scowl on her face. "Chris you can't tell her that. She's the grandmother of the baby." She protested but I ignored her.
"Bey I don't care. I've been involved in enough shit and I'm not gonna surround my child in any drama. I refuse to open a new chapter in our lives with drama. Unless we start to put things in place the bullshit never ends." She looked at me then returned to her previous position. "You're right..." It got quiet between us and we just enjoyed the silence growing.
I enjoyed times like this with Bey. We are able to have real conversations and be completely fine with whatever happens afterwards. Whether its silence or loud laugher, we will always be comfortable with each other because of our past and our love for one another.
"Chris?" I looked down at her and she was looking straight ahead at the open closet. "What's on your mind?" She turned around to face me the straddled my lap laying her head on my chest.
"Why did it take this long for us to reconnect?" Her voice was soft and light, it came out as a whisper almost. "I guess 'cause of fear—I don't know really." I rubbed her back as she started to get sleepy. "Maybe it wasn't our time then but we got each other forever now."
She moaned then snuggled her head into my neck. I got comfortable then pulled the blanket over us. I closed my eyes and let the sleep consume me.