A/N: Because third time's the charm? ;)
Enjoyyy
also theres some language in here , deal with it
Thx to @Norclop for helping me find promptssss love ya dude
Also @AM080705 because her/his writing is great and she/he inspired some of these:)
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Villain: You are the most irritating, most aggravating, most annoying person I've ever had to deal with!
Briar: Well, I aim to please.
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Bruce: Where are you going?
Sevy: To get ice cream or commit a felony. I'll decide in the car.
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Dick: If everyone jumped off a cliff, would you?
Tim: Bold of you to assume I wouldn't be the first to jump.
*cue Sevy and Dick having an aneurysm together*
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Sevy: Why do you always study the night before the exam?
Tim: Everybody knows that the best way to learn is under intense life-threatening situations.
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Sevy: WHICH ONE OF YOU IDIOTS LEFT MY BABY BROTHER AT THE GROCERY STORE?! He already has abandonment issues and this is making it all worse!
Bruce: I was in the cave the whole time.
Dick: I was eating lunch.
Tim: Why get groceries when you can get Starbucks?
Jason: Sevy- it was you, buddy-
Sevy: NO IT WASN'T, I GOT DAMIAN'S CALL WHEN I WAS COMING BACK FROM THE- f*ck.
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Briar: * runs into the room with panicked expression*
Sevy: Oh my god, what did you do?
Briar: NOBODY DIED!
Sevy: What kind of an answer is that?!
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Sevy: I . HATE. EVERYONE.
Damian: *voice cracks* Everyone?
Sevy: *sighs* except you and my family.....
Damian: :D
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Villain explaining the Batfamily: Okay, so they have like nine brain cells distributed among all of them. Batman has three, the techy-jumpsuit lady has three, Red Robin has one, Robin and Nightwing share one, they have one backup brain cell and Red Hood thinks he has one but it's just Nightwing whispering in his ear.
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Sevy: We have to do something!
Jason: *picks up Damian*
Jason: *literally yeets him at the bad guy*
Sevy: JASON WHAT THE HELL?
Jason: Don't worry lil sis, demon's indestructible.
Sevy:..........
Sevy:..........
Sevy: ........okay that's fair-
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Selma: Remember when we didn't try to solve all our problems with attempted murder?
Sevy: Stop romanticizing the past. Attempted murder is way cheaper than therapy.
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Villain: get down!
Nightwing: Okay. *starts twerking rhythmically*
Villain: What the fu-
*Red Hood knocks him out from behind*
Nightwing: Works every time.
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Sevy: This show seems a little... white.
Show director: Well, it's set in London in 1962
Briar: So what you trying to say? Black people haven't been invented yet?
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Bruce: Sevy? Why'd you call me at 3 AM, are you okay?
Sevy: *half-asleep* I- I think I'm sitting in a pool of blood.
Bruce: is it..... your blood?
Sevy: *still sleep drunk* Yeah, I think so.
Bruce: *panicking* Okay, uh, do you know where the blood is coming from?!
Sevy: Probably the stab *yawn* wound.
Bruce: HAVE YOU BEEN STABBED?
Sevy: Oh, ya definitely.
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Dick: I keep cursing in ice cream flavors and Bruce is telling me to stop.
Jay: How do you curse in ice cream flavors?
Dick: What the mint chocolate chip did you say to me, punk? I'll kick your rocky road and punch the ever loving strawberry cheesecake out of you.
Sevy: *sniffles* that was beautiful-
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Briar: Dude, did you eat my lasagna, be straight with me-
Tim: No, I'm gay as hell
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Tim: *having a bad day, waiting for the bus*
Briar: *pulling up next to him on a scooter*
Briar: beep beep, you sad f*ck
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Clark: Three tattoos? You know those are permanent, right?
Jason: Three kids? You know those are permanent, right?
Sevy: Technically both can be removed with lasers.
Dick: *slowly turns around*
Dick: *inhales*
Dick: What the fu-
Tim: *cutting Jay off* Sev's got a point, tho.
*bruce having a stroke in the corner*
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Selma: Many people are alive mostly because it's illegal to shoot them.
*GLARES AT CHRISTOPHER*
Christopher: *mouth full of bagel, obnoxiously scribbling all over a paper, continuously singing Seven Nation Army for the past six hours*
Morgan, walking past Selma: Who's keeping you from doing something illegal? Please shoot my twin, I'll hide the body for you. He hasn't stopped singing Seven Nation Army for the past 6 hours.
Selma: You know what, you're right, screw the system.*cocks gun*
Sevy: SELMA NO.
Selma: SELMA YES.
Sevy: SEL- NO MORGAN DON'T YOU FCKING DARE STOP IT PUT DOWN THE KNIFE
*andre and JP watching the chaos and eating popcorn
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Jason: Ah. Well, you're right! Alcohol doesn't solve any problems.
Jason: But neither does milk-
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IDK why but i think sevy is like the perfect mix of psycho and momma hen like she'll do stupid shit but then if you do stupid shit she'll attack you for doing it even though she did it like three seconds ago OMG she is so chaotic but then like so chill at times and she's such a childish dude at times but with like dami and tim she's like MY BABY even though she's less mature than both of them put together
holy geez yay thats a good batshit crazy character so proud of me :D
like she dont care if she's been shot if damian wants ice cream she's taking him to baskin robbins and staying there for 5 hours before going to the damn hospital
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Damian: Hey Sevy, can we get ice cream?
Sevy: Sure kiddo.
Damian: :D
*gets icecream*
Damian: Why is your cone so red? Did you get strawberry, I didn't think there was strawberry...
Sevy: Oh, no, they don't have strawberry cones.
Damian: Then what is that?
Sevy: Blood.
Damian: what the fu-
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Jason: They say whoever smelt it, dealt it-
Jason: So technically-
Jason: -This weed is yours
Jason: -OFFICER.
Officer Grayson: Jason, no.
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Sevy: If I jump off the banister with Jean-Pierre at the bottom of the stairs, he'll drop whatever he's holding to catch me
Briar: Prove it, sista.
Jean-Pierre: Sevy, why are you on the banister-
Sevy: TRUST FALL!
Jean-Pierre: WAIT SEVY NO I'M HOLDING HOT TEA-
Jean Pierre: STOP IT NO DON'T DO IT SH*T YOU'RE DOING IT YOU'RE JUMPING SACRE BLEU, WHAT THE SH*T IS WRONG IT YOU
Jean-Pierre: *cussing in french* CETTE PUTAIN DE FEMME JE JURE DEVANT DIEU QU'ELLE MOURRA PUTAIN DE MOI CETTE STUPIDE SALOPE-***
Jean-Pierre: *throws tea to catch a free-falling Sevy who jumped from ten flights up*
****OMFG so i checked if i translated correctly with google translate because im a extended french student so i decided to do my thing
and google translate is a jacked up translator site, it isn't very accurate, so it literally translates it to
:this f*cking woman I swear to god she's gonna die f*cking me b*tch
and i tried it again and this time it it translated it to
: this f*cking woman I swear to god she's f*ck f*ck me b*tch
LMFAOOOOOO y'all try translating this sentence it's HILARIOUS (at least it is for me, my sense of humor is pathetic)
Keep in mind the original sentence is: "This f*cking woman I swear to god she's gonna f*cking die, this stupid b*tch"
damn jp getting foul mouthed :)*****
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Sevy: What's your biggest fear?
Dick: Waking up as a chocolate bar.
Sevy:.... you'd eat yourself wouldn't you?
Dick: *whispering with a terrified look* Wouldn't even question it.
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Selma: You're violent.
Sevy: Yah, well I'm short, so it's adorable.
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Bruce: Did you have to stab him?
Damian: You were not there. You did not hear what he said to me.
Bruce: What did he say?
Damian: 'What are you gonna do, punk? Stab me?'
Sevy: That's fair.
Bruce: *glares at both of them*
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Sevy: *mumbling* I really wanna kiss you
BF: What?
Sevy: *panicking* Uh, I said if you died I wouldn't miss you.
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Bruce: Stop saying 'I wish' and start saying 'I will'.
Tim: I will my parents were still alive.
Jason: I will I could grab the Joker's neck and snap it and then dunk his dead body in acid.
Damian: I will I had a mother who actually loves me and doesn't use me like a tool for her own good.
Sevy: I will I didn't get blown to bits by my double-crossing traitor mentor figure that I once looked up to in front of my injured baby brother in the middle of the woods at midnight.
Dick: Okey dokey, we all need therapy
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Andre: *whining* BRIAR! SEVY'S BEING A BRATTTTTT-
Briar: Okay. Look at my face.
Andre: Uh, okay?
Briar: No, no, keep looking
Andre: I am looking!
Briar: No you're not, look harder.
Andre: Is there a point to this?
Briar: Yes. So keep looking as hard as you can, take in every inch of my sexy face.
Andre: Alright! I am!
Briar: Now........does it look like I give a f*ck?
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Sevy: Okay, let's actually go to sleep.
Andre: ...............
Selma: ................
Morgan: .................
Briar: ..................
Jean- Pierre:...................
Christopher: *giggles* The snack that smiles back-
Sevy, Andre, Selma, Morgan, Briar, JP simultaneously: Goldfish- DAMMIT CHRISTOPHER!
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Tim: Briar, I screwed up.
Briar: Hon, given your daily life experiences, you're gonna have to be a teensy bit more specific.
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Christopher: What do you mean? We're twins! We get along perfectly!
Morgan: I've had extraordinarily high stress levels from my time in the womb to the present.
Selma: Oh yeah, you two have been together since birth!
Morgan:* with dead tired eyes* No sh*t, Selma, that's how twins work.
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Selma: You only attract what you fear.
Andre: Oh shoot, I'm absolutely petrified of 10 billion dollars!
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Sevy: I'm gonna eat this entire jar of salsa and nobody is gonna stop me.
Alfred: *warningly* Miss Sevanna...
Sevy: one person is gonna stop me
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Christopher: Would you rather shoot Andre or-
Briar: Shoot Andre.
Christopher: But I didn't even say the other option ye-
Briar: I'd still shoot Andre either way.
Andre: I don't know about you, but I feel kinda unsafe, do you guys kinda feel unsafe?
Sevy: *passing by* I'd shoot any of you boys for free, 'cept JP. He's actually got some brain cells.
Sevy:(☞ﾟヮﾟ)☞
Jean Pierre: ☜(ﾟヮﾟ☜)
Andre and Christopher: *quietly slipping on their bulletproof vest*
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Morgan: I live in constant fear that someone will kidnap my twin brother, he lives at 45 Midnight Lake Dr,Complex B, Apartment Quarter 304, the one with a Pikachu poster on the wall next to it, leaves the door unlocked can't miss it
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Dick, trying to be philosophical: It takes a minute to get a crush on someone, an hour to like someone and a day to love someone. But it takes a lifetime to forget someone.
Sevy: I mean, y'all once forgot I existed and went to Bali without me
Bruce:*almost in tears* we said we were sorry omfg
Sevy: Nah, I won't accept an apology, this is great leverage for me, I ain't throwin it away.
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Sevy: Where the F*CK are my keys?!
Dick: Sev, baby sissy, Damian's right there. Can you maybe try to say that a bit nicer, please?
Sevy: Fine. May I please know the whereabouts of my f*CKING KEYS?
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Police: 911, what's your emergency?
Christopher: A MoNsTeR BRoKe iNTo mY HoUsE!
Morgan: *across the room, wearing a clay face mask* Chris, stop, we're siblings
Christopher: *screeching* IT FOUND ME
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Bruce: Alright, today we're going to do something new. We're gonna compliment each other over dinner. It'll be fun.
Jason: Ooh, ooh, I go first!
Jason: Ahem. Bruce, you should be proud the toilet is super jealous of you.
Jason: Since you're so full of sh*t!
Bruce: Jason, that's not appropriate-
Damian to Tim: You remind me of a penny.
Damian, still to Tim: Two faced and not worth much.
Tim to Damian: Well, you're like school in the summer.
Tim to Damian: No class.
Damian: How DARE YOU *brings out katana*
*tim and damian start brawling*
*dick tries to stop them*
*jason starts recording*
Sevy grinning like a maniac: you were right, this is fun
Bruce: just ONE dinner, is that too much to ask?
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Dick: SEV! CHRISTOPHER'S IN THE POOL AND I DON'T THINK HE'S WATERPROOF!
Sevy: What?
Morgan: It means Christopher is drowning.
Sevy: Oh. Okay.
Sevy:.............
Sevy: WAIT, WHAT?
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Damian: At least try to see the situation from my perspective.
*Jason crouches down*
*Tim squats*
Jason: Now what?
Damian: *seething* Okay you imbeciles, that's it. *unsheathes katana*
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Jason: We can bake these cookies at 400 degrees for ten minutes or 4000 degrees for 1 minute.
Bruce: nO, that's NOT how you bake cookies.
Dick: Do it!
Sevy: How about 4 000 000 degrees for one second?
Bruce: nO, YOU'RE GONNA BURN THE MANOR DOWN-
Jason: I'M GONNA HARVEST THE POWER OF THE F*CKING SUN TO MAKE COOKIES
Sevy: BRIAR CAN MAKE THE TECH TO MAKE THIS HAPPEN
Tim: *chanting* DO IT! DO IT! DO IT! DO IT!
Dick: *jumping on top of a table, hand in the air* WE ARE REVOLUTIONARIES
Bruce: NO-
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Tim at 3 AM: If Australians call barbecue machines 'barbies', do they call Barbie dolls barbecues?
Sevy: *sobbing* please just go to sleep
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Sevy: (pulls out knife)
Andre: Oh no!
Sevy: (opens box with knife)
Andre: Oh okay.
Sevy: (brings out gun that was in the box)
Andre: Oh sh*t.
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---BATKIDS LAST WORDS---
Jason: *sigh* Here we go again.
Duke: I don't wanna die.
Steph: This sucks.
Cass: *traces a heart on whoever's holding her*
Dick: *insert something sappy*
Tim: I'm sorry
Damian: I... failed
Sevy: God-f*cking yes finally woohoo sweet release of death come kiss me goodnight!
*everyone rising back up from the dead to yell at Sevy*
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