—————H—————
September 2, 1993
"Severus!" Hermione heard Remus shout through the closed unwarded door from where she sat in her husband's office chair. They'd had a feeling that this would happen when Albus had announced who would be joining the staff before the start of term.
Hermione watched the knob turn and waited.
"Severus," Remus burst in, not yet looking to the desk as he closed the door and set up silencing charms. "I need to ask you some questions I already know you're not going to like." Remus turned and froze.
"Hello, Remus," Hermione greeted him with a gentle smile.
He remained stunned, staring at her. "Hermione," he breathed as she got to her feet. She moved around the desk and he instantly wrapped his arms around her. She returned the embrace, though not as tightly or with as much feeling. She'd missed Remus, of course. His years after the Potters' death were a bit of a mystery since he barely kept in touch with anyone. But to Remus, this was more, and she was aware of it.
He eventually loosened his grip and pulled back, taking her in while holding on to her loosely. "The years have treated you well. Though I admit I ... I'm surprised to see you here."
"Because of—"
"Yes."
"You know I wouldn't have left because of that. I knew the truth, and even if he had stayed longer than a couple weeks, I would have waited," she said, stepping further away from Remus now that she knew what he hoped for.
"It would have been your right to leave him," he said, not unkindly. "Azkaban does things to a wizard, and you had a small child."
"Which, I'm guessing, is the reason you're in my husband's office," she replied, gently extricating herself from Remus' hold.
His eyes flashed hurt at the mention of what Severus still was to her, his empty arms hanging at his side a moment before he nodded. "I ... I didn't think you had two children."
"I do," Hermione said. "But Leo is only eight, he won't be a student for a few years yet."
Remus frowned; melancholy completely wiped away by his confusion.
"Leo," he repeated.
"Yes."
Remus' brow furrowed further. "Aurora Snape. She's—"
"My eldest."
"So, who is Hermione Granger then?"
Hermione took a deep breath, feeling out her body for the physical warnings as she thought of making the confession. There was nothing more than flutters, so she answered with a simple, "Me."
Remus laughed. "Yes, that was you. But who's this girl in my Defense class who has your name and looks so much like you?"
Her lips curled.
" Me ," she repeated with emphasis.
Remus opened his mouth and then stopped. He dragged a hand over his face, his eyes calculating.
The door opened and Severus walked in, followed by Leo. He took one look at the scene and then turned to his son. "To my rooms or Aunt Min's."
"Can I see Rory?" Leo asked hopefully.
"Only if she happens to be in the halls. We talked about this last year, you cannot go chasing after your sister while she's at school. Now, my rooms or Aunt Min's. And no, you cannot see Hagrid, there was an ... incident earlier, and he's a bit occupied at the moment."
Leo pouted. "I'll be in your rooms," he sulked before dragging his feet to the concealed door in the office. He went through and shut it behind him, the door to vanishing after him.
"He looks exactly as you did as a child." Remus gaped after the boy.
"Yes," Severus said. "But with luck, my reputation and his sister's will prevent anyone from tormenting him simply because he exists." Severus smoothly moved to stand next to Hermione, and she nearly rolled her eyes as she felt Severus' arm slip around her waist and clutch her possessively. "Now, what heartfelt reunion did we interrupt?"
Remus blushed. "I was enquiring about Hermione Granger."
"I married her fourteen years ago, I'm afraid you're too late," Severus stated.
"No. I don't mean ... I mean the one in my third year Gryffindor/Slytherin Defense class."
"Yes, I'm aware," Severus said. "And again, I married her fourteen years ago. And seeing as how, for her, this is before she meets us in our youth, anything you say or do will not affect the outcome of those years. She's already lived them."
She smiled at him, her heart swelling with gratitude and love that her husband interceded and told Remus what she probably couldn't. Oh, she'd played the scenario out in her mind countless times, really believing she would tell Remus the details. But unless she pictured telling him after Hermione Granger vanished from Hogwarts, she still risked breaking her Vow. And here was Severus, her partner and best friend even after all these years, telling Remus what she couldn't.
Remus stared at them as though hit by a Stunner before he burst out laughing, doubling over with the effort.
"I very nearly believed you," he gasped out, but slowly sobered when he realized they weren't joking. "But it's not possible. How?"
Severus looked at Hermione, and she bit her lip with indecision.
He turned to Remus. "Exactly as she's always told us: an accident. Any more than that and I fear your Gryffindor brashness may try to stop her using the means by which the accident occurred. If you do that, who knows what will happen. Bad things happen to wizards who meddle with time, even if they did not travel through it themselves."
Remus focused on Hermione. "So, she's really you."
"Yes."
"And you went back in time knowing ... knowing us. Knowing everything that was going to happen," Remus stated.
"You have to understand, Remus," she pleaded as she stepped out of Severus' hold. She placed a hand on Remus' arm, getting him to look at her even as his eyes glittered. "I couldn't do or say anything that would change the past. Lily, James, Sirius, all those things ... I was bound not to say anything. I couldn't warn them about ..." Her heart gave a mighty stutter and her breath caught so suddenly her knees gave out.
Two sets of arms caught her before she hit the ground.
"Easy, H.," Severus said gently. "Watch what you say."
"Right," she gasped, seeing understanding replace pain in Remus' eyes.
"A Vow. So, you couldn't even hint." She shook her head, and Remus nodded, stepping away. He paced as Severus straightened Hermione and held her against him, running a hand soothingly up and down her spine as her breathing evened out and her heart steadied.
"There is still one thing that's troubling me," he said, and when he faced them once again, she could tell the storm had passed and whatever he was about to say was in jest. "If you knew us all as we are now, then what in Merlin's name made you choose Severus ?"
—————H—————
September 2, 1975
She wondered if she would always feel like this at the beginning of every September, or if there would be a reprieve from feeling her loss so acutely. Hermione had been fine when she and Severus met Lily in Diagon Alley a couple days before, and Lily had announced she'd been made prefect.
But it hadn't sunk in, not really, not until they were on the train and Lily proclaimed she had to go to the prefect car for a while, and then do her rounds before coming back. Until, of course, they got to the school and she would have to ride in the prefect carriage.
It should not have made her feel as though everything she had ever done was for naught, but when faced with the reality that she would never actually achieve the goals she'd hoped for at Hogwarts: prefect, Head Girl, top marks all seven years, Hermione crumpled. What was the point, really? Yes, a magical education was important. But now, well, she didn't have the reputation to give her the titles she'd longed for from her first read through of Hogwarts: A History .
And her birthday was coming again. Sixteen. But how does one mention that in a conversation? Lily had managed last year through a self-absorbed conversation, and Hermione could never blatantly blurt it out. She was still quite certain that Delia and Bob hadn't found out when it was. Not that Hermione didn't think they cared, but they hadn't asked, and after the previous year ...
"So, I was thinking since we're the Gryffindor prefects this year," Lily said to Remus as she tossed her hair over her shoulder, revealing the shiny prefect badge pinned to her collar, "we should do our rounds together. I don't feel like we know each other well."
"You could always hang around with us instead of the greasy git," James suggested. "You know you want to, Evans. You can even bring Granger along, if you really want to."
Hermione didn't even have the gumption to roll her eyes at him. She'd been pushing porridge around in her bowl, trying not to fall prey to her own pity party and failing spectacularly.
"I'd personally love it if she came along," Sirius said, but Hermione still didn't bother lifting her head.
Instead, she dropped her spoon, picked up her bag, and slid off the bench. Without a word or backward glance, she left the Great Hall.
Defense was the first class of the day and while she had no desire whatsoever to face the grisly-looking man who she'd heard barking at students on her way to breakfast, it was better than being surrounded by reminders of what she'd lost.
A hand closed on her shoulder and she stopped.
"You have been moping since we got on the train. I'm well aware my company is not that riveting, so our being separated cannot possibly have you so morose."
Her lips curled involuntarily. "Actually, I quite enjoy your company,"
"Yet we both know that's not why you're like this." He gently turned her to him to study her face. "It's the accident, isn't it? Something has brought it to the forefront." Hermione nodded sadly, eyes dropping to the floor. "Why didn't you say anything?"
"You would think it's stupid," she said, sniffing.
"I might. But that's a risk you're going to have to take, isn't it?" he said with a shrug.
She considered it, peeking at him through her lashes. "I should have been a prefect," she mumbled, her heart beating uncomfortably. "I was working to it. I would have gotten it, I'm sure, but—" she gasped, her breath hitching as her heart gave a mighty lurch. It had been so long since she felt the Vow restrict her that while they were only warning signs, they still took her breath away.
"Hermione, look at me," Severus commanded, and her wide eyes shot to his. He put his other hand on her shoulder, tightening the grip he had on them. "Breathe. It's not worth it. All it would have done was eat into your time spent in the library or with a book, so you could go around and catch idiots sneaking food. Or as my mother suggested, shagging in open alcoves. And yes, there is a fancy bathroom, but what of it? Would you really want to share a bathroom with twelve pubescent wizards and eleven witches who will spend all morning in there applying their charms? Do you really want to get stuck with firsties asking inane questions or getting lost for the dozenth time?"
"Well, when you shine such a negative light on it," she grumbled.
"What else would I be besides the eternal pessimist?"
She snickered. "Severus Snape and a positive outlook. Yes, I can see how well those two would blend."
He quirked a brow, amusement glinting in his eyes, but he never cracked a smile.
"Hey, Sev!" Lily came up behind him quite suddenly, dropping her arm around his shoulder and startling both him and Hermione. She noticed that as his left hand slipped from her shoulder, his wand appeared in it as if a Finite had been cast and canceled a concealing spell. Lily hadn't noticed any of this, studying his head as she was. "Did you do something with your hair? It's different."
Severus sidestepped away from both of them, his right hand raised slightly as if he was about to touch it before he stopped himself.
"No," he said gruffly.
"Are you sure? It looks so good."
Hermione actually looked at it, brow furrowed even as Severus' looked at her with a hint of panic in his eyes.
"I honestly don't see anything too different," she said with a shrug. "It looks like it has since—" She suddenly understood it looked less greasy like it had each morning while he was staying with her. By lunch, it was oily again because of the work and the summer heat, but each morning and even most nights, his hair had a silken look to it after his shower.
"Since when?" Lily asked, reaching out and fingering a raven lock.
"What are you doing?" Severus hissed, stepping away from her again.
Lily looked hurt, and a little confused. "Sorry, it just looked so soft."
"I never gave you permission to touch it," Severus said through his teeth.
Lily laughed. "Since when do I need permission to touch you, Sev?" She stepped up to him again, bumping him with her shoulder.
"We're going to be late for class," Hermione interrupted. "And I'm not sure about you two, but I really don't want to begin our year on the wrong side of Professor Moody."
"Yes, it would be particularly unwise for me to do so," Severus said, adjusting his new leather messenger bag before setting off.
The three walked into the Defense Against the Dark Arts classroom with more than a little apprehension. Professor Moody was a bit scary-looking, if Hermione were honest. There was a bit missing from his nose and his hair looked like it hadn't seen a brush in a decade. He stared at the students as they filed in, focusing more on the Slytherins. He narrowed his eyes on Severus, flanked by two Gryffindors.
Hermione looked around the room, noticing a couple Slytherins were looking at Lily as if they pitied her, though Hermione didn't quite understand why. She'd seen them direct looks of loathing at Lily, especially the older Slytherins. But not pity.
"This is Defense Against the Dark Arts," he said in a clipped tone. "Defense starts with knowledge. Who can tell me why the Dark Arts are so addictive?" He looked around the room, and for the first time in her academic career, Hermione had absolutely no desire to raise her hand. She could feel Severus look at her from the corner of his eye.
"You," Professor Moody said, looking straight at Severus.
Severus stiffened.
"Well?" Professor Moody snapped, staring Severus in the eye without blinking.
"The Dark Arts can be seductive," Severus replied. "Its power can lure even the strongest wizard."
"There's a high." Professor Moody nodded. "Makes a witch or wizard feel stronger than they are." His eyes shot to Hermione, and she felt a niggle in her mind as though she'd forgotten something. "So how do we stop it?"
Hermione pulled her gaze away and looked around the room. Everyone was riveted, awaiting the know-it-all's answer.
"We can't," she whispered.
"Why not?"
"Because it is ever-changing," Severus answered for her. He was confident, more than he usually was in class. "Once someone believes they know how to put it to rest, a great darkness comes along."
"So how do we defend ourselves?" Professor Moody asked, a hint of intrigue to his voice.
"As you said: knowledge."
Professor Moody smirked, and it was a sight that made Hermione squirm uneasily.
"We will learn to think like Dark Wizards and through that, we learn to defend."
Professor Moody snapped his wand toward the blackboard and words began to appear in an unsteady hand.
Hermione took notes and did her best to keep her head down and not draw attention to herself. She still felt Professor Moody's eyes on her.
"Of course Snivellus knows all about the Dark Arts," she heard Sirius whisper behind them. "He knows more hexes and curses than most seventh years."
Severus stopped writing, his body tensing.
"He just hopes its powers of seduction are transferable to him. Merlin knows he'd never get anyone's attention otherwise," James added, earning a quiet snort from Sirius and Peter.
"You lot," Professor Moody snapped, the room startling at once. "What are you gossiping about?"
"Just the accuracy in which Sniv—Snape described the Dark Arts and their ... tempting wiles," Sirius said with a roguish grin that caused a few of the Gryffindors to chuckle uncomfortably and the Slytherins look angered and confused.
"Oh. Believe yourself immune to them, do you?" Professor Moody asked. Before Sirius could answer, the professor continued. "Because let me tell you: it doesn't matter what house you were placed in at school. Great Aurors have come from all of them, but so have Dark wizards." He turned, looking at each person in the room. "Doesn't matter what color tie you wear, it's what you do that matters." He looked at Sirius, squinting. "You're a Black."
"I am," Sirius replied, chin raised.
"Haven't known a Black yet that wasn't a little Dark," Moody shot back.
"I'm also the first to be sorted in a house other than Slytherin in centuries," Sirius boasted proudly.
"Just means you aren't sly enough to know when to keep your mouth shut." Professor Moody turned his back, ignoring the snickers from the Slytherins.
The rest of the class continued smoothly, even if the man was a bit abrupt and loud at times. Hermione was eager to escape and head off to Runes with Severus when the professor stuck out his arm and caught her before she made it to the door. "You're Granger?" he asked, and she nodded. "Stay after class." He then looked at Severus. "You can go."
"Can he stay?" Hermione asked quickly. Lily passed, looking confused but didn't stop. Care of Magical Creatures was too far from Defense to risk being late.
Professor Moody looked unsure for a moment and glanced at the door as the last student left. "Wait outside," he ordered gruffly. Severus did as he asked, and once he was past the threshold, the professor flicked his wand and the door slammed shut.
"Dumbledore told me about you," he cut to the chase, "about your knowledge of the future."
"Oh?" Hermione asked, chewing the inside of her cheek to stop herself from lashing out.
"Sometimes the things in your head aren't as safe as you want them to be. Like how much you fancy that Slytherin friend of yours."
Hermione blushed to her roots. "I—"
"It's in your head, girl. I'm a shit Legilimens, but even I could poke around enough to pick up on that." He then flicked his wand at the door, and revealed Severus standing in the doorway, arms crossed and eyes narrowed. "You. In," Moody said, and Severus did as instructed. The door slammed shut again. "I was telling Granger here how her mind isn't safe. You, though, you got some walls up. You're a natural, and I think you might be able to help."
"With what?" Severus asked uncertainly, looking more than a bit off-put by the idea of someone rooting through his mind.
"Occlumency."
—————A—————
September 1, 1993
"Rory," Harry said from a few seats down, and Aurora turned her attention to him. "Why does your dad hate Professor Lupin?"
If Aurora were quite honest, she hadn't really been looking at her dad. In fact, she'd been trying really hard not to think of the possibility that her dad did know Professor Lupin, and therefore the possibility of everything going sideways when it came to Hermione Granger's presence.
"He doesn't, but he's not happy about him being here," she said, and when the confused looks of all the nearby Gryffindors were suddenly turned toward her, she chuckled again. The food appeared, but no one reached for it just yet. "If my dad really, truly hates someone, he doesn't even acknowledge their presence. You may have noticed how he pretended Lockhart wasn't here at all last year? Unless it was necessary, like dueling club."
"Perhaps," Hermione mumbled, looking at her plate with a light blush. Of course she noticed anything pertaining to Lockhart.
"Yes, well, that's how Dad hates someone. I would say that, if anything, his presence is not as welcome as it could be. Aside from that, I don't know." She shrugged and started helping herself to the food in front of her.
Harry and Ron looked apprehensive, but Hermione gave a swift nod in understanding.
Aurora glanced up at the table, and saw her dad poking at his food and watching Professor Lupin suspiciously. Feeling eyes on him, his gaze shot to hers, widening ever so slightly. "'Come see me," he mouthed, and Aurora nodded.
—————A—————
Aurora made her way through the castle to her father's rooms in the dungeons. It was past curfew, but since the feast went to curfew, it was kind of hard to see her father beforehand.
She was just approaching the staircase leading to his room when someone rounded the corner and gave a mighty yelp.
"Aurora!" Madam Pomfrey clutched her chest.
"Sorry, Aunt Poppy," Aurora whispered.
"What in the blazes are you doing out of bed?" she demanded, hands on Aurora's shoulders as if she didn't know whether to pull her closer or shove her back in the direction of the Gryffindor common room.
"Dad said he wanted to see me," she replied, keeping her voice low. "Sounded like it was important."
Poppy gave a sharp intake of breath and frowned. She mumbled things under her breath that didn't sound too pleasant, and then let her shoulders sag. "Let me walk you to his rooms, then."
One hand came off Aurora's shoulder, the other gliding along Aurora's back so that her arm was secured around her shoulders. Aurora allowed Poppy to guide her to the door and even knock for her. It was probably because of Poppy's firm knock that her father's deep voice rumbled a neutral 'Enter.'
Poppy gave Aurora a gentle push inside and then followed before passing her to stand in the sitting room with hands on her hips.
"Severus Tobias Snape!" she said sternly.
Oh, well, this was going to be interesting. Even her mother never used her father's middle name when she was angry with him. Aurora scooted to stand just inside the room.
"I know exactly why you have called your daughter down here, and I know full well you were told not to reveal that information. Were you willing to kill yourself to tell her or were you going to hint around it?" Poppy scolded an unaffected Severus Snape, much to Aurora's amusement.
"I was only going to warn her to be extremely wary of our new professor, particularly around the time when it's best to pick most potions ingredients."
"Why do I need to be careful around Professor Lupin on the full moon?" Aurora asked with a tilt of her head as Poppy huffed and crossed her arms.
"No reason," her father said as he stood and moved to the bookshelf, running his fingers along the spines. "I never did take Care of Magical Creatures."
"Severus," Poppy warned again.
"Dad?" Aurora said.
He turned toward her. "You're nearly as voracious a reader as your mother. I'm sure if you were to ask her younger counterpart if you can glance through the third year Defense textbook, she would gladly let you. So long as you handle it with the utmost care. I think you would find a chapter in the book quite ... enlightening."
"'Kay," she said, glancing at Poppy who still looked annoyed but satisfied that her dad didn't say what she clearly thought he was going to.
"Now, get to bed," he said, shooing her away. She was just at the door with Poppy behind her when she heard, "And three points from Gryffindor for being out of the tower after curfew." When Aurora whirled around to argue, he smiled. "I said come see me, I never said it had to be tonight."
—————A—————
September 2, 1993
"What are they going on about?" Ginny asked as she and Aurora entered the Great Hall for lunch. Hermione, Harry, and Ron were going at it in hissing tones.
"Professor Trelawney predicted Harry's gonna die," Seamus replied.
Aurora snorted. "Trelawney has predicted my parents' divorce for as long as I can remember."
"Sorry, know he's your dad and all, but still find it hard to wrap my brain around the fact someone actually married the great bloody bat," Seamus said before nervously glancing at the head table.
"What else did she say?" Ginny asked.
"Said that Hermione had no future," Seamus replied, and Aurora froze.
"She couldn't have possibly said that," Ginny said with a snort. "Hermione? Lauded as the brightest witch of her age? No future."
Aurora shifted, appetite lost.
"Said that Hermione would not see the end of the year."
Aurora let out a mirthless laugh, then resumed eating. While Ginny shifted uneasily, she said, "My parents have been together for something like sixteen years. Trelawney may get the odd prediction right, but for the most part, she spouts utter delusions. Hermione will probably drop the course and therefore, not see the end of the year."
"Suppose that makes sense," Seamus agreed just as Hermione slammed a book open, sending bits of food flying at Ron.
"We have a free period after this," Ginny said, pulling Aurora's attention away from the trio. "Want to pop up to the common room? Play some Exploding Snap with me and Colin?"
Aurora groaned. "Fine, just don't brag too much when you annihilate me, all right?"
Ginny grinned wickedly. "No promises."
—————H—————
September 2, 1975
"It's... complicated," Severus said as he and Hermione huddled under the birch tree by the Black Lake looking over the book they borrowed from the library. Madam Pince was not too pleased to see the loan happen, as she was whenever a book left the library. But since it was them, she let it go with only half the annoyance she usually had.
"It seems nearly impossible."
"And why does Professor Moody want you to keep your mind hidden?" Severus asked with only the slightest inflection. It was almost as if he knew the answer and was only checking if Hermione would tell him the truth. Which, really, she couldn't if she wanted to.
"Probably because of the reason I'm here now," she answered. The mixture of truth and vagueness guaranteed her friend would not detect deceit while preventing even the slightest symptoms of the Vow.
Severus hummed in acceptance. "That I can believe," he mumbled, and Hermione's lips twitched with satisfaction. "It'll be a challenge, that's for sure. But it'll be a useful skill. Imagine being able to control your every reaction to every stimulus?" He turned to her, his black eyes locking onto hers. "One could appear calm and in control in a situation that may have left them a stuttering, blubbering mess. You could feel deeply for someone and they would only know if you let them. Imagine never having to worry about having your feelings hurt because they were tucked away behind a wall where no one could touch or manipulate them."
Hermione hoped that the sun was at the proper angle for her to explain away the slight reddening of her cheeks. Her heart didn't know if it wanted to soar or shrink, burst with the affection she had for him or drop down to her feet to hide everything she felt.
"It would certainly ..." She found herself at a loss for what to say, and his steadfast gaze on her certainly didn't help. "It would prevent a lot of heartache, I think."
Severus snorted, finally looking away and breaking the spell he had over her. Hermione blinked rapidly, hoping he didn't notice the slight heave to her chest as she caught her breath.
"And what are you two up to?" Lily asked as she sat on Severus' other side.
Severus shifted to sit up straighter, bowing his head and hiding behind his hair. "A task Moody assigned us."
Ah yes, of course. How could she have forgotten? Who had hurt Severus the year before by standing him up? Yes, he seemed to have lost his romantic interest in Lily, but if he was a natural, as Moody pointed out, he'd have already been able to control that, wouldn't he? He'd be able to repress all the strong emotions she'd caused.
Jealousy welled in Hermione unchecked and she shifted away from the pair.
"To you both?" Lily asked. "I thought he only asked Hermione to stay."
"He did. She asked if I could join her. After a brief conference, he allowed it."
"So, whatever it is Professor Moody is asking, he doesn't think she can do it alone. He thinks she'll need your brilliant mind."
"Why are you doing this, Lily?" Severus asked with annoyance. The tone caught Hermione's attention, and she turned her head to hear them better.
"Doing what?" she asked.
"The compliments to my looks and my intelligence? The latter which you haven't done in a while, and the former which you never have."
"Oh, well, can't I just notice when my friend does something to make himself more ... interesting?"
"Interesting?"
"Attractive."
"Attractive?" The condescension in Severus' tone had Hermione shifting back to where she'd been before so she could see what was going on.
Lily had stretched across the grass in such a way that she was propped on Severus' outstretched legs at the knee. She was smiling coyly, her long hair cascading behind her and pooling on the ground.
"You can't say that you haven't made an effort. You look healthier, your clothes fit better," she said, gesturing to him.
"And that makes me worth your attention now, does it? I have come a modicum closer to the likes of Potter and Black, so now I'm worthy of notice."
"Don't be like that, Sev," Lily said, her smile fading entirely. "You were always worth my notice. We're friends, best friends, and have been since we were kids. But you've changed, and it's for the better."
"Well, miracles happen when one can afford things for the first time in one's pitiful existence," he sneered. "And I believe the health you are referring to comes from hard work away from the slums."
"What did you do all summer, anyway? I never got the chance to ask you on the train. You were missed, you know. It wasn't quite the same without you. Tuney was nearly impossible to deal with, and apparently she's got a boyfriend now." Lily smiled up at Severus, waiting as he remained silent for a while.
"I worked," he said.
"You went to stay with Hermione to work?" Lily finally looked at Hermione. "When you ask someone to your house for the summer, you're supposed to have fun, not put them to work."
"What makes you think it was Hermione's idea?" Severus asked. "Mr. McGonagall offered we work for the vegetation portion of our potions kit and if we did more than that, we were paid. It would be foolish to turn down such an offer, especially when it comes with free knowledge."
"And a Bowtruckle," Hermione interjected.
"I didn't keep Bowie, and we both know it."
"I thought you said you would name him Ziggy?"
"I said I would consider it if I got one. I did not."
"All right, fine. Wait, free knowledge?" At this, she sat on her knees, hands on her hips. "Exactly how did you acquire this?"
"You were the one who chose to work on the flower beds and the cooking herbs. I, however, went with Bob into the more potions-oriented areas. I asked, he answered. You live with him; you could have done the same thing yourself."
"Well forgive me if I didn't want to ply him with questions about his job when he comes home to relax," she said with put-on petulance, and Severus let out a snort.
"Anything you could share with us, Sev?" Lily asked.
"I could," he replied with a single nod. "But it was more or less ingredients or uses beyond what we'll have here."
"Ah," Lily said, a knowing glint in her eye. She smiled smugly, glancing briefly at Hermione before she got up off the grass. "I wish I could stick around, but McGonagall wanted to see Remus and me for something, so I'll catch up with you in Potions." She looked down at Severus as she brushed off her robes. "Would you like to be my lab partner today?"
He tilted his head to meet her gaze. "No," he said bluntly. He didn't elaborate.
Lily turned her hurt gaze to Hermione, mouthing the word 'please.'
Hermione understood what Lily wanted instantly.
"I'll partner with you, if you like," she said while holding back the grin that tugged at her lips as Lily's eyes widened. "Though that means that Marlene or Alice would have to work on their own, since I doubt that Severus would be able to put up with them. Or worse, one of Marauders. Can you imagine one of them working with him?"
"Remus isn't all that bad," Lily said hopefully.
"It won't happen," Severus said firmly, returning his attention to the book in his lap. "We haven't been lab partners since first year. I can only imagine that you want to pair up because Slughorn will notice that you aren't quite the natural you seemed to be the first two years."
Lily's jaw dropped. "That was cruel, Sev," she managed to say after a time.
He glanced up at her. "If you say so."
Lily's face pinched as her hands turned to fists. In a flash, she stormed off, red hair trailing behind her.
When she was out of hearing range, Hermione said, "It was quite mean."
Severus sighed, his shoulders dropping and his body relaxing as if he'd been incredibly tense. "I am ... uncomfortable with how she's acted since the end of last term. The way she behaved in the park, the way she clutched my arm in Diagon Alley, her insistence on cramming into the space next to me on the train. She'd been distancing herself from me for the past two, three years, and suddenly it's as though we are first years again."
"But ..." Hermione chewed her lip, glancing to where Lily had taken off, debating if she should say anything. She glanced at Severus, seeing him watching her intently, and she blushed. "Never mind."
She wanted to offer an out, to say that he could go with Lily, that she wanted a new partner. She wanted to offer him a chance to say no again, to affirm that he wanted to be with her . But Hermione couldn't, she simply couldn't. The fear of his rejection was simply too great to overcome when her feelings for him were still so new and raw. And he would reject her, she was sure. He'd liked Lily, was infatuated with someone so much prettier, warmer, friendlier than her.
Her only advantage was her brain, and she knew it.