a/n: above is kenna's dress for the album launch party!
McKenna Prentiss | February 12, 2018
"As soon as you're finished here, we're driving to Ryan Seacrest's radio station, then from there we're hitting 3 LA radio stations." Zoe cites off from her binder as I sit in the make-up chair, my hair and make up being done for my first TV appearance.
"Do I have a change of clothes in the car?" I ask Zoe, my eyes closed while the make up artist finishes my make up.
"All ready! Kelsey and Niall are hanging around today to support you." She says, and I smile.
Since Harry's birthday, Kelsey and Niall have grown quite close to each other. Kelsey was a bit wary at first, since Conor broke her heart not long before Christmas, maybe that's why she wanted to party so bad on New Years.
Kelsey and Niall also have been hanging around me more frequently, if it wasn't both of them at my house, it would be one of the other. I never had anyone to rely on, other than Kelsey, but now that Niall and I have remained really good friends, I guess you could say I was finally opening up.
"You're all set!" Jane, my make up artist taps my shoulder, I open my eyes and saw that she had only done the bare minimum for my make up, and I love it.
"Thanks, Jane!" I kiss her cheek, and she laughs.
"Alright, take a deep breath McKenna, I know how nervous you get for these types of things." Zoe speaks, placing her binder on the dressing table. She places her hands on my shoulders, and looks me straight in the eye, "Just breathe."
I take a deep breath, closing my eyes to try and calm all my nerves.
"I'll be alright." I whisper, and take another deep breath. I open my eyes to see Zoe smiling at me, tears welling up in her eyes.
"I'm so proud of you Kenna." She smiles, and I immediately pull her into a hug. "You know who else is proud of you?"
I pull away from the hug, to look at her in confusion. She grabs my by the arms and turns me around, and I'm faced with Kelsey, Niall, my parents, and someone who I didn't expect to be here.
"Gran!" I exclaim, seeing her just made everything else better. I run toward her and tackle her in a huge hug.
"Oh, my little Townes." She whispers, her arms around me tightening as she savors our hug.
"Gran, what are you doing here?" I ask once we finally pull away from each other, and her hand finds its way on my cheek, cupping my face in both of her hands.
"I missed your birthday, I missed your fashion show, we missed Christmas, I'm not missing this, Townes." She smiles, and my grin is wide now. Tears welling up in my eyes.
"Oh, sweetie don't cry." She laughs, and I let out a small chuckle. "I'm so proud of you, Townes."
Gran was the only person who called me Townes. She said it was the name she gave me, McKenna came from my parents, and Townes came from her, which was why she called me Townes.
"I love you, Gran." I speak, then my eyes find my parents who were smiling fondly at our encounter, Kelsey and Niall stood next to them with bright smiles on their faces, "I love you all, so much."
I was on the brink of tears, which made everyone laugh. "Don't you dare ruin my beautiful work, Kenna!" Jane warned, which made everyone laugh harder.
"McKenna to the stage! McKenna to the stage!" The production assistant yelled, and everyone scrambled in to get in the group hug I initiated.
"We're all so proud of you Kenna!" My dad says, and everyone erupts into a fit of cheers.
When we pull away, Zoe finally whisks me to the side of the stage where I would be entering from. I watched the monitor from backstage as Ellen introduces me to her audience.
"Today, we have a very special guest. She's started her career at 16, walked her first Victoria's Secret runway at 17, her face graced the cover of Vogue when she was 18. Her first album Flutter, released later this week. Please welcome, Kenna Prentiss!" Ellen introduces, her arm motioning to my side, and I emerge from backstage, a shy smile immediately finding its way to my face. I walk to Ellen, she envelopes me in a hug and kisses my cheek. She motions for me to sit on the solo couch before her, and I did.
"How are you Kenna?" She asks, and I smile.
"Good, how about you?" I nervously respond.
"Good, good. Now, let's talk about your album." She reaches to her side and she pulls a blown up photo of my album cover, and I smile as the crowd cheers. "So, talk to me first why'd you name it Flutter?"
"Alright, so Flutter refers to how a butterfly's wings, you know, flutter." I speak, and the audience lets out a chuckle, "The symbol of a butterfly has always been associated with me, in a way. My grandmother always told me how I am a butterfly, how I bloomed into this beautiful being who doesn't see how beautiful she is. I believe butterflies also represent growth."
"That's wise!" Ellen encourages, and I smile, the audience applauding.
"So, what should we expect from your album?" She asks, and I shrug.
"Well, it's a journey, that's all it is." I shrug, and Ellen nods.
"So, let's talk about your parents for a second here." I nod, and let Ellen run her course.
"So, how'd your dad feel when you walked the Victoria's Secret Fashion show for the first time?" She pulls up a photo of me in my first Victoria's Secret Fashion show, it was my baby blue set with a yellow tulle robe.
"Well, when I was younger, I told him how I'd always want to be a model. I remember this one time where we were at our home in South Carolina, and I told him how I'll be an angel, just you wait and see. He was actually proud, kept going on and on about how angel-like I looked on stage." The crowd aw-ed and I smiled.
The rest of the interview went great. I was grateful I had told Zoe to tell the producers of each interview that I didn't want to talk about Harry, or about anything else.
After Ellen's interview, we all tried to squeeze into one car on the way to Ryan's radio show.
"Kenna, it's time to release the track list." Zoe announces from the passenger seat of the car, turning her head to face me, and I nod.
As soon as I posted the track list, Zoe's phone started to ring, and she rolls her eyes. She turns to face the front of the car and answers her work phone.
"Yeah? No, absolutely not James." Zoe's frustrated voice rang through the car, it was as if Zoe's voice drowned out the music as she continued to argue with whoever it was on the phone.
"James, I already told Ben that she won't be answering any of those questions!"
"Well I don't care if you went out of your way to call me! Kenna won't answer any of those questions. Don't put her on the spot James!" She was getting frustrated, I can tell, and for Zoe to get frustrated this means that James could only want one thing, to ask about Harry.
I sit forward, tapping Zoe's shoulder, she turns to me, covering the mouthpiece of her phone.
"If he's so persistent, then fine, I'll answer a few questions, only a few." I say, and she looks at me with uncertainty in her eyes.
"Are you sure?" She asks, and I nod. She sighs out in frustration, turning back to sit comfortably.
"She said fine, James. Only a few questions. Three at the most." Zoe huffs out. She finalized a few things with James before hanging up.
"Are you sure you want to do this, Kenna?" She asks warily, her eyes meeting mine from the rear view mirror.
"Positive. What could possibly go wrong?"
February 13, 2018
"Kenna, you need to breathe." Zoe's grip on my arms tighten to prevent me from falling to my knees.
"I can- I can't." I stutter out, my lungs feeling as if it's about to collapse anytime soon.
"Can somebody get Mr. Prentiss!" Zoe yells out to the staff who was outside my room.
"Z-zoe, I c-c-can't. I can't do this." I try to breathe out, but my chest feels like it's being weighed down by a ton of bricks. Not another anxiety attack.
"Mack! Mack, look it's going to be alright." My dads arms finds its place on my arms, taking the position of Zoe's hands, he lifts me and places me on the couch in the green room.
"Daddy, I don't think I can do this." I cry out, and he wraps his arms around me, his hand holding my head to his chest as he tries to solace my cries.
"Mack, listen to me," He coos, his voice quiet and comforting, "If you feel like the question is too intrusive, or too personal, just answer it vaguely. We've practiced this before, remember?"
I nod softly, trying to calm myself in my dad's arms.
"McKenna, you're needed back- oh." Ben walks in the room, eyes focused on the clipboard, as soon as he sees us, he cuts himself off.
"I'll get back later." He says, and I shook my head no.
"I'm fine." I stand from my dad's embrace, walking over to the mirror to grab a tissue and wipe the few tears that escaped my eyes.
"You sure you're fine Kenna?" Zoe asks, her hand places itself on my shoulder, I nod at her, smiling softly.
"I'll be fine!" Zoe looks at me with wary in her eyes, nodding hesitantly.
I walk from my greenroom to stand behind the curtain, waiting for James to call my name for tonight's interview.
"Please welcome, the most gorgeous model I've ever been friends with, Model and singer, McKenna Prentiss!" James announces, and the curtains before me lift up, showcasing me to the audience. I smile, walking over to the couch were Tom Ellis was currently seating.
I sat next to Tom, pulling down my skirt a bit so I don't accidentally flash the audience.
"Kenna, Tom, how are you two?" James asks, Tom answers and I just nod at him.
"So, Kenna, talk to us about your upcoming album." James asks, leaning forward on his chair, Tom looks at me, a encouraging smile on his face.
"So, it's called Flutter, and it's a symbol for butterflies." I shrug, and Tom smiles.
"That's beautiful." Tom encourages, he reminded me a lot of my dad, which made me ease into this interview a bit better.
"My gran always compared me to a butterfly, and it's because of her that I got to make this album." I speak, thinking about my gran which makes me calm down even more.
"Recently, you posted your track list for your album, talk to us about that." He pulls out a board with my track list plastered on it.
"So, like I said, this album is a journey. Listening to the songs, in that specific order, it's like a journey of someone who experiences love for the first time. The beginning of the album is about someone falling in love, then from falling in love, she realizes that her partner is falling out of love, until they break up. The last two tracks talk about growth, and moving on." I answer, finally revealing to the public the journey of my album.
"You're a smart girl, that's very clever!" Tom speaks from beside me, and I smile, thanking him.
"Speaking of falling in love, let us in on a little secret, which songs are about Harry Styles?" Come right out with it James, why don't you?
"Uhm- I-, well- I don't really think of it that way. I guess a lot of people write from experience, and what the public sees is only a fraction of a celebrities life. Everybody experiences heartbreak at one point in their life." I shrug, and I mentally pat myself on the back for the good job I did dodging the question.
"That is true actually." Tom chimes
"So, how are you and Harry?" He asks, and I feel as if it wasn't James who was asking, it was as if this whole thing was orchestrated to humiliate me, I hope not.
"Good, we're good." That's the vaguest my answer could get, and thankfully James finally turns to Tom to ask him questions about his show.
I would chime in and laugh here and there, but ultimately, my mind was elsewhere. Releasing the track list was one thing, but explaining it was a different story. People are going to put two and two together, and obviously it's about Harry. Well, the only obvious song to the public is Pink skies, the other songs, only Harry would be able to figure them out. That's if he does figure it out.
February 14, 2018 | 9:00PM
"My, my, my, Kennie you look absolutely gorgeous!" Kelsey takes my hand and spins me around, which makes me erupt into a fit of giggles.
"Surprise, surprise!" Someone knocks on my door, a the brunette pops his head in with his hands covering his eyes, "Is everyone decent?"
"We're fine babe!" Kelsey yells out to Niall who walks back in my room, hands in his pockets as his eyes drift from me to Kelsey. As soon as his eyes land on Kelsey, his smile brightens, his cheeks turning pink.
"Kelsey, you look amazing." Niall speaks, and now it was Kelsey's cheeks that turned pink.
"Alright, I'm gonna leave because the sexual tension is getting too much." I raise my hands, moving to leave the room, but Niall's hand caught my wrist.
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry! Let's have fun tonight, shall we?" He laughs, and I smile, nodding in response.
"Wait, before we go down," I turn to Kelsey, "Did you invite a surprise guest? Because I don't think I can deal with those today and I-"
"You're safe, don't worry. No surprise guests, I promise." She smiles, and I nod. The pair make their way out of my room, and I stare at myself in my vanity mirror. This is your night Kenna.
I make my way out of my room, and descend the stairs, and it felt like everyone's eyes were on me. I clutch the dress in my shaking hands, I take a deep breath, and I look up, to see everyone grinning at me, proud smiles on their faces.
My parents soon join me by my side, my gran watching with the people my parents had invited for my album launch party.
"We're so glad to have all of you here with us tonight," My mom starts to speak, a glass of wine in her hand, "I know it's Valentine's and that you'd rather be with your significant others, but it warms my heart to see you guys spending your night with us."
"We're really excited for Kenna's album release, and we're really proud of her. Kenna," My dad turns to me, his arm around my shoulders as he starts to speak again, "I know how hard you've worked for this album, and I can see how dedicated you were to finishing this album with all the pressure surrounding you. I'm also proud at how you pushed yourself, and how you opened up in your album."
I was on the verge of tears, and I look to my mom who was wiping her eyes with a tissue.
"Dad, alright that's enough, you're going to make everyone cry." I laugh out, bringing back the joy and lightness in the room.
"Right, right, everyone, let's raise our glasses in cheers for this wonderful, kind, and beautiful person. To Kenna." Everyone raised their glasses and cheers-ed with each other.
The party was in full swing, and I was to make a speech at 11:50, so when my album drops at midnight, everyone will finally start to hear it.
To say I was nervous was an understatement, I was fucking anxious. I was scared that I might have another anxiety attack. I was so tempted to call Harry, to help me calm down, but I wasn't his to bother anymore. He's happy with Camille, I should be happy for him.
"Kelsey, I- oop!" I opened my door to see Kelsey and Niall heavily making out on my bed.
"Seriously, you guys? On my bed?" I groan out, and they both scramble to their feet, Niall running his hands to fix the mess that is his hair, and Kelsey fixing her dress.
"Sorry! Sorry! The guest bedroom was locked." Kelsey apologized quickly, her eyes full of shame.
"No need to be embarrassed guys, I knew you would give in to each other soon enough, I just hoped it wasn't on my bed."
"It's almost 11:50, we should head down for your speech!" Kelsey exclaims, taking my wrist in her hand to drag me out of my room. It was a good thing I had gripped Niall's wrist as well, so she basically dragged Niall and I out.
We finally reached the backyard patio, Kelsey pushing me in the middle of everyone while Niall gets everyone's attention.
"Uh-" My eyes grow wide at the attention, feeling pressured. Niall and Kelsey soon saw my discomfort and walked to stand by my side. Niall put a comforting hand on my back, and Kelsey took my hand in hers and rubbed her thumb along my knuckles.
"Uh, okay. First off, I want to say thank you to everyone who came tonight. The reason why I chose the day after Valentine's for my album release is because I want those people who didn't have a Valentine, or those who's hearts were broken before, on, or after Valentine's, heck even those who are spending Valentine's with their significant others, I want those people to be able to connect and relate to my songs. Blast it in the car along the coast of Malibu, sing it at the top of your lungs, cry in bed, do whatever you want! My album is for everyone, and for anyone." I speak, and everyone erupts into cheers.
"Thank you. This journey wasn't easy. Hell, it was one of the hardest things I've ever done in my entire life. As much as this album hurt me, it also saved me." My eyes scan across the room, looking at people who my parents had invited, and looking at some of my friends who were here.
"It helped me learn to give love a chance, it also helped me learn to let go when love is hurting too much," I was on the verge of tears, but I stopped myself, I looked down and took a deep breath, and when I returned my gaze to the people before me, I saw the familiar green eyes that once gave me comfort, but now gave me pain, "I-uh"
I couldn't speak, I couldn't break away from his gaze. Niall's hand started to rub circles in my back to comfort me, and Kelsey's other hand grasped my wrist, she leaned in my ear and whispered, 'You're doing great.'
"Uh-, You can't ultimately choose who you fall in love with, hell, you can't even prevent yourself from falling in love with someone. When you fall in love, love takes over. It takes over your mind, your being, your heart. But that love can also be taken away, it can be ripped from you, and all that's left is for you to mend those pieces together. That's what this album did for me. It truly was a journey, and I hope that when you listen to the album, you guys would hear the journey, the story." The whole time, my eyes were locked with Harry's, my tears finally flowing out of my eyes.
I finally broke eye contact, looking at my watch and seeing that it was already, perfectly, 12:00AM, my album was finally out for the world to hear.
"Everyone, this is Flutter. Enjoy the rest of the night!" I try to sound as enthusiastic as I possibly could, but it felt forced, and that's not what it was supposed to feel like.
"Kenna, that was- that was, wow." Were the only words that came out of Niall's lips, and I chuckled. Kelsey nodding in agreement.
"Thanks guys, for literally being by my side." I smile at them, and they both sandwich me in a hug, literally.
"We're proud of you Ken." Niall says, kissing the crown of my head as Kelsey kisses my cheek.
"Now, let's party!" She yells, and I laugh.
I didn't see or hear from Harry for the rest of the night, and that was probably a good thing. Maybe this is what I needed to move on. Maybe this is the closure I need.
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hey angels! my week seemed to have freed up, so I had a few hours to write this chapter! her album is finally out and I made a playlist for this story, and for McKenna's album!
i suggest you guys listen to McKenna's album to understand how she is/was after the whole Harry thing, and I suggest listening to it in her track list order! I trust you all the feels will be released!
i hope you guys are enjoying the story so far!
all my love,
savannah x