Angel
Once we came home from that vacation it was time to go back to school. I was eager of course and excited to go back. With this newfound willingness to open up to people, I naturally wanted to make more friends.
Even though usually I didn't care much about what I looked like, I straightened my hair for the first time that day, and put on a pretty pink dress. It fit the three fingertip rule that we had at the school, but just in case I dealt with a snooty teacher, I paired it with a denim jacket, and a pair of white vans.
Once I was finished getting ready, I grabbed my bag then I went downstairs in search for anything to quickly stuff into my mouth before I had to leave for school. When I got to the kitchen, I found Blake eating a bowl of soggy looking cereal. We hadn't spoken a word to each other since the incident two weeks ago, and as of right now that was fine with me. I didn't want to talk to him again until he apologized.
Not only for the slap and the name calling, but...for touching me inappropriately.
I opened the refrigerator door, turning my back to him. I reached in and grabbed a pitiful looking orange that was all the way in the back of the refrigerator. Once I had it in my hands, I closed the refrigerator door then turned around:
he was there, inches away from me—just staring at me.
How did he manage to sneak up behind me, without me having a single clue? I was just glad I didn't scream because that would've been embarrassing. I tried to sidestep him and walk away, but he wouldn't let me, blocking each direction I tried to take.
"Please..." I said, still avoiding eye contact. "Get out of my way."
Then I felt his fingers on my face, and he was forcing me to look at him. When I looked into his eyes for the first time in two weeks, I could see how awful he actually felt. His eyes were red-rimmed, and his eyebrows were scrunched up like he was seconds away from crying. It made me slightly sad too, but I didn't say anything.
"Angel." He said, his voice barely above a whisper.
"Don't." I could feel my voice trembling. For some reason I didn't want to forgive him, not just yet. The things he did and said...just didn't sit right with me.
"I'm sorry, Angel! I don't know what came over me. I don't know why I started kissing you, I don't know why I cursed at you, and I don't know why I...slapped...you." He swallowed, briefly looking away before his eyes found mine again. "But please, you have to know how sorry I am."
"I just...need some space right now." My eyes were downcast, despite his fingers still tilting my chin upwards.
"What?! Bu-but I just gave you space. Do you know how hard it's been, not being able to talk to you or make you laugh?! How lonely it's been without you?" He screamed. "I mean look at what I've been doing to myself!"
He lifted his long sleeve to reveal his arm which was covered in slashes. Instantly, I knew that he was cutting himself, but for how long I couldn't tell. There were slashes that looked a few years old, and others that looked very recent.
"Oh my goodness." I breathed, taking his bruised arm into my hands. I gently traced each cut, my eyes filling with fresh tears. I too went through hard times, especially after my dad died, but never once did I get an inkling to do anything like this.
"I stopped doing it the night I met you." He whispered. "But then, whenever I hurt you I started up again. You don't know how awful I feel about everything." He said, then pulled his sleeve back down.
How could I never have noticed? Even when we were in the pool, I should've noticed. Or when he came into my room that one time shirtless, I should've noticed! They were decorated all across his arm like a tattoo, how could I not have noticed that? This boy was suffering so much, and here I was just adding more fuel to the fire. Overcome with guilt, I wrapped my arms around his neck, and buried my head into his shoulder. Then I started crying.
"I'm so, so sorry. I shouldn't have been that angry."
He only nodded his head, then wrapped his arms around my waist. I could feel the relief through his hug, his shoulders sagged and he released a huge breath. I felt a little better too, maybe now we could work on being better siblings.
Then we finally released each other, stepping away and creating some much needed distance.
"So, my dad went to work, and your mom is gone...I think she said she was going on a spa trip. She told me to tell you that she said bye and she loves you."
"Oh." I said, suddenly I was even more sad.
"Cheer up buttercup, I'm supposed to be taking us to school." He said, his confident smirk back on his face.
"You can drive?" I asked, raising my brow.
"I guess you'll have to wait and see."
After I finished my orange, we walked to his car. He had a nice car and I felt lucky that I didn't have to take that ugly, smelly, yellow school bus anymore. Instead, I'd arrive to school in style with a fancy drop top sports car.
"This is a fancy ride." I said, getting in and buckling my seat belt.
"Thanks, I got it for my birthday last year."
"I really like the navy blue and grey colors, it suits you." I said, giving him my first genuine smile since two weeks ago.
"Why thank you madam, are you ready for the first day?"
"Yes, I can't believe I'm going to a new school...in the middle of the school year." I sighed, then shook my head. "But I doubt it will be a bad experience."
"Right." He agreed, then backed out of the driveway with ease.
"I just wish my dad was here... I miss him."
I whispered. I didn't even mean to bring up my dad, but my mind instantly went to him. He should've been present on a day like today.
"Well..." Blake swallowed, did I make him uncomfortable? "At least I'm here." He finished, quickly glancing at me, with a smile on his face.
"True. And hey, you are a pretty decent driver."
We were about halfway to school; since I lived in this new neighborhood I had to go to a new school, and this new school was very close. To me, it was good to get away from that other school, there was too many people there that knew me and knew what happened to me and my family.
Here, I'd be able to get a fresh start and completely start over. That was kind of the same way I felt about living in the new house too. As much as I'd miss the other one, and my old life, I was happy to be away from it.
It was nice not having constant memories and reminders in your face, twenty four seven.
"Hmm, don't think this means I'll be driving you around all the time." He said, laughing and rolling his eyes.
I laughed with him, and for once things felt normal. Exactly as they should've felt.
Once we got to the school, I felt so nervous. The familiar butterflies and first day jitters came rushing to me, and I found myself struggling to breathe and my chest was tightening.
"Relax Angel." Blake said, placing a reassuring hand on my knee. "You'll be okay. Besides I can show you around."
"You promise?" I asked.
He looked at me so seriously, and earnestly.
"Of course. You have my word. I'd never lie to you."
I gave him another smile, and he gave my knee a final reassuring squeeze, then we exited the car. The school was large, and looked very strongly built if that made sense. It didn't have a lot of windows, and it seemed to be made of brick or stone I couldn't tell the difference.
For the most part, it looked uninviting and amazingly intimidating. It was a private school too, so there was a pretty apparent lack of diversity right away, unlike my last school. Here it looked like everyone shopped at Old Navy, and requested pumpkin spice lattes at Starbucks.
We entered the building and instantly my nose was filled with the smell of drying paint and a rotting durian. I pinched my nose, trying my hardest not to gag.
"Does it always smell like this?" I asked.
"Only the first few days back from any break...don't worry, it gets better." He said.
"I have to go to uhm...the attendance office to get my schedule." I said, inching closer to him to avoid the kids scurrying quickly through the crowded hallways.
"Okay, I'll take you." He replied.
After a few twists and turns in particularly skinny hallways, we finally arrived at the attendance office. I looked hesitantly at Blake, wondering if he was going to stay and wait for me, or get to class instead.
"I'll be here." He said, as if he could read my mind.
I nodded my head then shakily opened the door. Inside the office there was a few chairs sitting against the beige colored walls. There were also orchids sitting on top of the receptionists desk. She was typing away feverishly, then she glanced up at me once I entered.
"Hi, I'm Angel. I came here to get a schedule?"
"Last name?" The big woman asked, looking as evil as a cartoon character with her beady eyes staring at me behind a pair of particularly thick glasses.
"Oh, it's Damaris."
"Oh, that's an interesting last name." The lady said, chuckling to herself.
"Yeah, I think it means—"
"Here you are Miss Damaris."
"Uh...thank you." I replied, grabbing the pink piece of paper from her desk.
Once I was back in the hallway, I instantly found Blake talking to some bottle blonde chick with a botched nose job and a skirt that was far too short to be fitting the schools dress code. She was twirling one of her dead ends and dramatically blinking her eyes, exposing her long false lashes.
I couldn't help but to think the girl was a pure skank.
When Blake saw me exit, he immediately shooed the girl, then smiled at me. "So what classes you get?"
I handed him the paper. Immediately, he took out his phone and took a picture of it. When I looked at him confused, he shrugged his shoulders and said—
"I want to know where you are at all times."
I thought it was strange but I didn't complain. The bell didn't ring when it was supposed to, in efforts to help kids get to class on time. Mainly because some kids didn't know where said classes were.
The delayed bell surely helped me out, because if it rang on time, I'd probably very late.
I nervously walked towards my first period, Geometry with a woman named Mrs. Cunnings.
"Don't worry kitten. I'll be here whenever you get out the class. But do not, under any circumstances leave without me." Blake said, once we reached the outside of the classroom.
I nodded my head. "Okay, see you."
"Bye." He responded, then walked away like he didn't have a care in the world.
I entered the classroom, immediately finding that I liked it. It was pretty, the walls were white and brick, but they were littered with artwork and past students projects. The desks were arranged in groups of four, and the white board had a pretty "good morning" on it in cursive. The teachers desk had tons of papers, which I wasn't exactly sure why they were all there. Surely we couldn't have homework this soon?
It was the first day for crying out loud, what could they be for? She also had a nice laptop, that was hooked up to a projector; which apparently meant there had to be a projector screen as well.
Overall, it was nice, and apparently this class had the only windows in the school. They were big letting in lots of sunshine. My teacher was sitting at her desk, flipping through the papers. Once she noticed me she nodded her head and smiled at me.
"Welcome in." She said.
"Thank you."
"Please, sit anywhere. There aren't assigned seats."
I inwardly groaned. I wished for assigned seats because I didn't have any friends and wouldn't know anybody in this class. Nobody would willingly sit by me, and I'd be lonely all over again.
Nevertheless, I chose to sit near the windows by the back of the class. It was further from the board, but I liked being able to see outside.
Eventually students started trickling in, and then the classroom was filled. There wasn't a lot of kids though, which was surprising. In my old school, each class could easily have 35 kids and up, but in this class the capacity was barely hitting twenty. I guessed that was a benefit, with less kids, there was room for the rest of us to get the proper teaching and attention we needed.
I thought I was going to be stuck sitting alone until a girl and a guy joined me. They looked pretty similar with black hair and brown eyes. Both of their outfits were nice too.
The girl had on a plaid skirt and a long sleeved navy blue shirt (like she was wearing a uniform or something), and she paired it with knee high boots that matched the skirt nicely. She had a pretty scarf tied around her neck, which seemed to make the whole outfit work. Also, she wore her hair in the popular half up half down style, which girls were doing a lot nowadays.
The guy was wearing a simple short sleeved white v neck tee and jeans with a pair of converses. He had on a chain which I could tell was expensive, and his shaggy black hair was almost falling into his eyes. All in all, they looked nice, and now that they were sitting I could tell the smelled nice too.
"Hey." The guy said instantly, breaking the silence. "I'm Jayce and this is my twin Candace."
"Hi!" She said, her voice unbelievably high pitched and squeaky. She reminded me of a chew toy that a dog would play with.
"Hey, I'm Angel." I replied, twirling my thumbs nervously.
"You know...you look pretty new. I've never seen you in this class before..." Jayce said.
"Yeah, I've totally like never seen you before." Candace added.
"Oh." I swallowed, feeling my social anxiety coming in full force. I didn't want to say anything stupid, but I also didn't want to just not respond at all. "Well...this is my day here." I finally managed to say.
"That makes so much sense!" The girl, Candace, said. "Is that nose yours? It's so pretty."
Absentmindedly, I touched my nose, but when they looked at me confused I dropped my hands to my lap. "Yeah...it is." I replied.
"Nice." Jayce said, then smiled at me.
Before we could start a conversation good, the bell rang and the teacher started talking. Then, she started passing out all the papers on her desk, and I found out they were just a bunch of things our parents had to sign, and class assignments that would hold us for the first few weeks. I was kind of confused that she gave it to me so early, but also kind of happy that I had time to learn all the material.
Soon, class was over. The bell rang and everyone started packing up their things. Jayce and Candace looked at me, then Candace said,
"You know, we could show you around..."
"Yeah, where's your next class?"
I handed Jayce my schedule and he skimmed it, then passed it to Candace. "We only have lunch together." He said.
Once Candace finished scanning it, she handed it back to me, a big smile on her face. "Well, we have next period together! I could show you where it is."
"I don't know, I should probably wait for my stepbrother..."
"Oh? Who's your stepbrother?" Candace asked.
"Blake Harrington." I replied shyly.
"Seriously?! The hottie with those exotic grey eyes? Sucks that he's just your step-brother. He's honestly like this schools...bad boy." Candace said, sighing.
"Hey! I thought I was the hot bad boy." Jayce said.
Candace rolled her eyes then continued. "Oh you wish. Anyways, girls practically throw themselves at him...and every guy loves trying to be his friend. Other then like his two friends he hangs out with, he's pretty much a loner though."
"Wow."
That was all I could think to say. It was interesting to learn his reputation and learn what other people thought about my...weird stepbrother.
"Well, you should be fine. He'll probably leave you waiting, thanks to all the girls that swarm him in the halls."
I considered this...she was pretty much right. There was that girl this morning that was talking to him outside of the attendance office. Besides—I glanced at Candace—she seemed nice, and I wanted to have a new friend. Also, I really couldn't afford to be late waiting for him.
"Okay." I nodded my head, and then we were off.