"Hi."
His eyes are sunken in, dark circles dragging underneath his eyes and his lips pulled downwards. He looks like a sad puppy, his dark hair all scruffy and sticking up in each direction – probably from him running his hands through it so many times.
"I came to give you this," you extend the umbrella out before you. He nods before taking hold of it, his hand far at the opposite end making sure not to keep his distance. The more you look at him, the more sorry you feel for dodging his texts. He looks like he hasn't slept a wink, and you're afraid it's all because of you.
"Oh...uh, thanks," he struggles to make eye contact with you, looking down at the object in his hand.
It's awkward, uncomfortable, and you can't seem to find the words to say to break this strange tension between the two of you. He's acting weird, shifting his weight back and forth but not moving away to close the door. His mind is racing once again – contemplating whether or not to just invite you in or leave it at that.
But with every aching bone in his body, he musters up the courage to lift his head, looking you directly in the eyes. Their dark like his, definitely from the lack of sleep you had the night before. Your mouth is turned downward too; hands fiddling together to try and distract yourself.
"D-Do you wanna come in?" He stutters, stepping aside slowly as he gestures towards his house. He suddenly worries when you don't respond right away, taking a second to contemplate if this is a good idea or not. Ripping off the band-aid is never easy, but it needs to be done.
"Sure," is the word that you decide on – hoping that it doesn't make you seem disinterested or too desperate to talk. Maybe he's just being kind though. Maybe it's an empty offer, something that you say when you're trying to be nice, but subconsciously hope that they won't take you up on it. Like when you offer to share your food with someone, but you're really hungry. You do it to be nice, not because you actually want to split the delicious looking burger and fries on your plate.
He leads you inside and to his bedroom. It looks the same as always, but it feels different. It still smells like him though, the comforting woodsy scent of pine and mahogany that he always reaches for. But that comforting scent is anything but comfortable. You're frozen in place, unsure if you should sit on his bed and make yourself at home, much like every other time in the past. For now you just stand in the doorframe, waiting for him to tell you to take a seat, just like any polite guest would. A guest. You have never felt like a guest in his home before, or around Taehyung in general. But that imaginary wall between the two of you is standing tall and sturdy, and suddenly the two of you are reverted back to being strangers.
You watch as he toys with something on his desk, his fingers dancing from object to object and sifting through papers to look busy. The point of it – unknown to you but to him, he's buying time. Trying to think of the first thing to say, what to ask, or if you even wanted to talk. Maybe you only agreed to come inside to be nice. Maybe you were too worried about hurting his feelings if you said no. But alas, here you are, standing awkwardly in his doorway as he shuffles around his room, his brain flooding with thoughts – but his mouth can not form them into audible words.
"I'm sorry for ignoring your texts."
Your voice catches his attention, dropping whatever paper he's looking at now and turning his gaze to you. You're sunken into yourself, your chest thumping with anxiety as his eyes begin to wander your frame. Not in a 'I'm checking you out' manner though; more of a 'you look so sad and I don't know what to say to you right now' kind of way.
It's true though, he doesn't know what to say – which is why he's staring at you, hoping the right words would just pop up and he didn't have to use any brain-power at all. He doesn't want to say 'it's okay,' because it's not. You never ignore his texts, and that alone tells him enough about what's going on. You are upset at him.
"What did I do wrong, Y/N?"
His words sound accusatory but his tone is soft, gentle and full of worry. Eyes swollen and looking like they are about to fill to the brim with tears, his sight is focused on you; now not able to look away.
"I-I don't know..."
Your answer is honest. You don't know if his intentions are dirty. Yeah, that's what you thought initially, but looking at him with such hurt written all over his face tells a different story.
Taehyung is silent, unsure of what more he can do or say to make you talk to him. He can't force you to open up, he never has and he never will – that's always been his rule. Everything you've shared with him has been on your own terms and conditions. Taehyung has always been here to be your listening ear, but he never pries.
"Do you want to talk about it?"
His voice is soft, eyes full of sympathy as he holds himself together. Those were the words he has been looking for. Now the ball is in your court and you'll have to be the one leading the conversation. It's just what he needed to figure this shit out.
"I-I don't know."
"Y/N," he sighs as he drops himself down onto the mattress, "I shouldn't have to say this for you to know it, but you know you can talk to me about anything, right?"
You do know that. You really, really do. But this time things are different. Is he expecting you to just come out and speak your truth like there won't be consequences? No, he won't push you to tell him anything you don't want to. But the worry in his eyes and clammy hands are begging for you to just let it out so he can stop being in the dark.
You sigh out an 'okay' before sitting down beside him.
Rip the band-aid off Y/N. Quick and painless.
His eyes narrow, almost to a squint, staring right through you in hopes of reading your thoughts. Your expression is nothing but blank as you try your best to gain some sort of composure. Do you just speak up and spill your guts? The words replay in your mind over and over until your thoughts are beat down and misshapen.
You can picture his face when you say it; disgusted with a trace of disappointment and some confusion spread into the mix. Or maybe he'll laugh at how pathetic you were, catching feelings for your fake boyfriend.
That's it. There's no way you can tell him. It would be much easier to just get up and leave. Tell him to pretend like none of this ever happened and that you needed some time to cool off. A few months maybe, or maybe you could just ghost him entirely.
"Y/N?"
The sound of his voice breaks you out of your toxic thoughts, and his chocolate brown eyes bring you back down to earth. You can't just leave him in the dust. He's looking at you like you're the only thing that exists. Things will be okay, right?
"Sorry, sorry," you exhale deeply as you calm your thoughts; shifting the nasty scenarios out and accepting that whatever happens after this conversation is your fate.
"Taehyung, I-I guess I wasn't expecting this boyfriend-girlfriend thing we're doing to go like this."
His brow quirks at your words, confusion riddling his expression as his eyes narrow. With a tilt of his head, he's pushing you to continue, visibly riddled with your choice of words.
"Swear you'll be honest when I ask you this?" You question him, your hand moving closer to his as you lean in slightly. He's like a magnet, you can't help yourself from moving closer; even though the proximity of the two of you is clouding your thoughts and you can feel your heart beginning to swell.
He nods in response to your question, his eyes full of concern as he waits for you to continue, "Why did you ask me to do this thing?"
He knows that a question like this was coming, only if he could have prepared for it. But he didn't, so his throat is left dry and scratchy as his mouth opens, only to stutter a bit before closing it back up. No coherent thoughts or words are able to escape his lips, just nonsense mumbling that caught himself off guard.
With a deep breath, he closes his eyes, regaining his composure before he can face you again. He agreed to be honest, and if honesty is what you want, honesty is that you'll get.
"I'm sorry." That's all that he can say.
Oh no. This is exactly what you were expecting before you came here. He's gonna tell you that he didn't mean to mess with your emotions, that he felt you catching feelings and got carried away. That he's sorry that he ruined your friendship and played you like a violin all at once.
"Me too."
You don't know why you're apologizing, but you are. It feels wrong. Absolutely utterly, and undoubtedly wrong. Apologizing for your own feelings is not something that you are okay with. Especially when he made you fall for him like this. Okay so maybe thinking that is giving him too much power, but who the hell takes you out on dates for nearly 2 weeks straight just to laugh about it later. How can he expect you to not catch feelings for him? With his deep voice and fluffy hair that always hangs in front of his eyes, that little giggle he has when he finds something amusing. Everything about him was attractive. And you've fallen for it all. Hard.
"Wait, why are you sorry?"
A scoff escapes your mouth unintentionally, but it's well deserved. "For being the idiot to fall for a guy that was playing her, I guess."
You can't look at him any longer, so your eyes fall to your lap, staring at your chipped nail polish and dirty fingernails instead of reading whatever dumb expression he has now. But if you just took a second to look up, you'd notice the widening of his eyes, how his fingers are beginning to shake and his mouth gape.
"Wh-What?"
"Don't make me say it again Taehyung, I don't feel like sounding stupid one more time."
"No no I heard you, it's just," his eyes slam shut, angry at himself that he let things get this far without keeping you in the loop.
You've been telling him that you hate love for years now. After hearing it so many times, he'd just given up on the thought of you. Maybe if he said something before you went through all those shitty guys things could have been different. But he's let this go on for far too long, and now you're the one that was paying the price.
"Y/N, I have feelings for you."
Your neck nearly breaks with how fast your head snaps up. He's the one looking away now, his cheeks a bit rosy as he tries to hide himself. He isn't doing a very good job though, his hair is only shadowing his eyes and you can clearly see the way he's nervously chewing on his lip; a cute habit you have grown fond of these past couple of weeks.
If he didn't look like he does right now, you'd assume he was messing around. But you know Taehyung. You know his small little gestures and what they mean by now. You know when he's being serious and when he's telling a lie. He can look someone dead in the eye and lie to them, but when he tells the truth, he becomes shy and worried that he's said the wrong thing.
"Why didn't you tell me?" You ask softly, gently reaching for his hand. The subtle contact makes him flinch, reacting by pulling your hand away. But his eyes meet your sympathetic ones, sparkling just like they always do, and he knows what he wants.
Taehyung's hand reaches back for yours, lacing his fingers through yours before giving your hand a light squeeze. "You hate relationships," he chuckles lightly, the mood of the room instantly shifting as the laughter leaves his lips.
"I hated the ones that weren't with you," you correct him, but your voice comes across as just a whisper. He's close enough to hear though, a blushing grin forming on his face as you shyly look away. His heart flutters when he hears it, a million butterflies erupting in his tummy all at once.
"I hated the ones that weren't with you too," he coos, his eyes wide and sparkling as he looks at you with such adoration.
Time moves in slow motion as his hand meets your cheek, your eyes look deeply into his chocolate ones as he moves in closer. As your eyelids flutter shut his tongue runs across his bottom lip, wetting the surface before closing the distance between you. Finally.
And in that moment you're at peace. Everything you thought you've ever hated, love, relationships, and maybe Taehyung for a hot second, are the only things that you long for. The 14 days don't have to be over, and your days no longer have to be counted. When you're with Taehyung you're happy, you're comfortable, and you're confident that he can give you what you have always deserved – but have never gotten.
His lips move against yours in slow, languid motions, his large hands holding you close like he's holding on for dear life. But you won't leave even if you want to, not now, not after all this.
Slowly, Taehyung shifts his weight and you move in succession. He's laying you down on his bed, gently climbing over you without breaking the kiss. Things are becoming more heated now, you can feel it as his hungry lips devour your own. Your chest heaves up to meet his, your back arching off the mattress as his hands begin to scour your body. The heat pooling in between your legs is growing, an aching sensation overwhelming your core as your own hands reach up to rake through his long, fluffy hair. And you can tell he wants you too, the thin fabric of his sweatpants doing little to conceal the growing erection pressing against your thigh.
You can't help but let out a steep moan as his hips begin to grind into yours. Needy groans fall past his lips and onto yours as you roll your hips upwards to meet his small ruts.
In a leisurely motion, Taehyung's body is moving upwards, his knee finding a place between your legs as he brings himself up to a kneeling position. You chase his lips the entire way there, sitting up straight to be sure the contact doesn't vanish, too consumed by your need for him to leave his lips.
And then his needy hands are running along the waistband of your sweats, fiddling with the tie before breaking your heated kiss. "Is this okay?" His words come out in a whisper, his eyes searching yours for any signs of doubt, but all he sees is lust.
"Yes," you confirm, out of breath from making-out for so long without coming up for air. The lightheaded feeling taking over you goes unnoticed though, and quite frankly you're too caught up in Taehyung to care.
Quickly, he rids you of your pants, looking back up at you for confirmation about your underwear. With an affirmative nod he's removing those too, leaving you completely bare from the waist down as he stands over you fully clothed.
But soon he's ridding himself of his own clothing, his shirt being pulled at the nape of his neck as he discards it across the room. He's leaning back down to you, hungry for the feeling of your lips. He misses it, even though it's been less than a minute since he's last felt your smooth lips on his.
You won't open your eyes to see, but with the shuffling movements and shaky connection between your mouths you can tell Taehyung is stripping himself of any remaining clothing he has on. He's needy, unable to wait any longer to get down to business, he's already waited long enough.
You're the one who breaks the kiss this time, too curious to see what he's sporting down below for your own good. But you are not disappointed once you see it – he's long and girthy; the pigment a shade or two darker from his skin tone than the rest of his body. Your thoughts are wandering, wondering what it's like to have him inside of you; dreaming about what he feels like. Arousal pools at your core, mouth salivating as your daydreams linger.
"Like what you see?" Taehyung chuckles. You barely notice that you've been staring, eyes wide and focused on the hardened dick before you, which is probably a bit uncomfortable for him.
"Sorry!" You cringe at yourself lightly, covering your eyes in embarrassment in fear that you just ruined the mood you've worked too hard to create.
"Don't apologize," he smiles as he grabs your wrists, moving them away from your round eyes. Scrunching your nose in displeasure, you catch your lip in between your teeth, mentally face palming at how weird you're being.
He couldn't blame you though, it was taking everything in him not to gawk at you. It was the first time you've seen each other naked. Bathing suits did little for your imagination, not that you had even thought about Taehyung this way before.
But he eases your nerves by coming down face level with you, reaching for your shirt and pulling it up over your head. You look at him with wide eyes, taking in each part of him as he caresses your body gently. He's in awe of you like this. So relieved that you're finally his, that he has you like this.
Nimble fingers dance down your body, landing at your core as he runs one up your slit, collecting your arousal on his fingertip. An impressed smirk grows slowly on his face, "I can't believe you're this wet already," he hums. "All for me."
His eyes remain focused on your center, devouring it with his eyes as his hands hold steady on your thighs. You can't help but grow slightly embarrassed, dripping with arousal so early on though he's barely touched you. A lump forms in your throat causing you to swallow thickly – this doesn't go unnoticed by Taehyung.
A concerned expression crosses his face, brow furrowing as he moves his hands upward to settle on your waist. "Hey," his voice is soft, gentle and full of worry, "everything okay?"
"Just nervous," you answer, a fake smile showing on your face to try and combat your own emotions.
It is no secret that Taehyung is a bit more experienced than you are in bed. He knows that, you know that, and that is enough to turn you into a nervous wreck. Leave it to your own thoughts to ruin the moment.
"We don't have to..."
"No!" Your voice comes out a little too eager, a bit loud, shocking Taehyung. His eyes widen in response, body jolting from the impact of your tone. "No," you say more gently this time, "I want to."
You did want to – you just have to get over your own nerves first. Luckily, Taehyung didn't mind and was willing to guide you through it.
With a reassuring smile plastered across his face, he laces his fingers through yours. As you lock eyes, you nod him onward, giving him the go-ahead to continue. He moves languidly, his fingers moving back down to trace your slit once more. The sensation makes you tense, the nerves tingling through your body making it difficult for you to calm down.
But with a reassuring squeeze of his hand to yours, you're taking a deep breath. Closing your eyes as you lie your head backwards onto his pillowcase. The smell of him consumes you, relaxing you effectively as his fingers meet the entrance of your core.
Shivers run through your body as he dips one finger inside. Your arousal acts as a natural lube, letting his finger glide gracefully into you. You gasp at the sensation, eyes rolling back into your head as he begins caressing your walls. His finger moves swiftly in and out of your core, his other hand still locked with yours to guide you through.
With your body finally relaxing, Taehyung is able to add another finger into the mix. The extra pressure makes you shudder for a moment, taking a little to adjust to the greater size inside of you. Thankfully the mild discomfort subsides, and he's able to pump his fingers in and out once more.
He's making sure to watch each of your expressions, growing harder and harder just from watching your face contort in bliss. With each of his movements you bite down harder onto your lip, focusing on him and him only.
"You're doing so well," he praises as his thumb rubs circles over your hand soothing you. You can feel your heart swell at his words, heat beginning to rise to your cheeks.
In one swift motion, Taehyung begins to separate his fingers, stretching your walls as his digits move in scissor-like motions inside you. "Fuck," you mumble, hips jutting forward in reaction.
A steep moan leaving your lips as he brings his fingers back together, just to extend them once more. Your body is quickly getting used to the pressure, begging for more as you roll your hips.
He can sense that you're eager from your movements alone. With one final squeeze, his hand is leaving yours. The empty feeling in your palm is unpleasant. But once you open your eyes and notice he's using it to palm himself, his fingers groping around his length and beginning to pump slowly, that empty feeling is replaced with something else.
Your mouth salivates with desire, hungry for the feeling of him inside of you. He's aroused you enough, and you're too eager to feel him for your own good.
"Taehyung," you moan, "fuck me please."
His cock jumps in reaction to your words, his chest heaving as his breath catches in his throat. Never in his life did he expect to hear those words come out of your mouth – but he wouldn't mind hearing it again.
"Hmm?" He hums, knowing damn well what you said but being greedy enough to pretend that he didn't. You whine in response, your legs shaking on the bed in a mini temper-tantrum.
"Please," you drag out, "please fuck me."
Your words are music to his ears. He removes his fingers from your dripping cunt, grabbing the backs of your knees to pull you closer to him and hike your legs up over his hips.
"Anything for you."
Complying to your wish, he lines the tip of his cock up with your entrance. The feeling of his smooth head against your core is enough to make you moan, your head thrown back to expose the soft skin of your neck.
Taehyung takes this as an opportunity to leave his own mark behind, leaning down to attach his lips to your skin. You gasp as his teeth graze your skin, his plump lips sucking harshly before his tongue is swiping over the area to soothe it.
But your eyes open once he's beginning to pull away to look at you. His eyes are dark, full of lust mixed with adoration, a sigh of relief leaving his chest as he gazes down at you under him. There's a lot going on in his head right now. Of all the emotions swirling around, the thing he's most focused on is how lucky he is to have you.
And before you know it, he's leaning down. Pressing a chaste kiss to your lips, making you smile. One more kiss is left on your forehead before he's pulling back, securing the position of your legs on his hips.
And then he's realigning himself with your core, pushing past your entrance and slowly descending into the depths of your pussy. He's moving slowly, taking his time as he thrusts into you. The delicious stretch is unfamiliar, but it's not uncomfortable – like you were made just for him. A simultaneous groan leaves your lips as he bottoms out, the tip of his cock pressing deep into you on a spot that's gone untouched.
He hums a sigh of contempt before pulling back, only to rock his hips into you once again. Your velvety walls welcome him delightedly, soft whimpers leaving your lips once he bottoms out again.
"Y/N," your name leaves his lips in a low grunt, the bones of his pelvis driving into your skin as he begins to pick up his pace. In reaction you clench down on him, orgasm beginning to loom overhead with each movement of his hips.
Desire fills your senses as you roll your hips over to meet his thrusts. His movements are slow and intentional, making sure to bottom out each time to watch you squirm over his dick. He loves how your jaw drops each time his tip presses against your g-spot, knowing just when he hits it each time.
Taehyung's teeth are barred, sweat gathering at his brow as his dark fluffy hair sticks to his face. He's trying to hold himself back, the overwhelming urge to finish just in reach, but he doesn't want to stop. So his hands roam your body to try and distract him, his palms caressing up the sides of your torso as your back bridges into him. The feeling of hot breath fans over your face with each sigh he lets out.
But the tightening knot in your stomach is threatening to snap with every movement of his hips. It's getting harder and harder to hold on with the power of his thrusts growing stronger.
"Taehyung," you whine, "so close" your hands find his back, fingernails dragging down his spine in attempts to ground yourself. Taehyung's face contorts as your nails pierce his skin, leaving lines of red scratches down the length of his posterior.
The stretch from his length and his rhythmic motions sends your senses into overdrive. Squeezing your eyes shut and grasping onto the sheets underneath you, you can taste the brink of your orgasm. Taehyung is focused; his grip on your thighs strong and his face contorted with bliss. But all you can think about is how stupid you could have been if you had decided to just cut him out. What matters is that you're here with him now, and the thought of that is enough to push you over the edge.
Your breath hitches in your throat, stomach twisting and turning as your pussy throbs repeatedly around his member. Emotions running high, three words almost slip past your lips, but with the small amount of strength you can muster up, you hold them back. Another time, some time that isn't so lust filled like this one.
Taehyung's thrusts are growing sloppy. His grip on your legs tightening as his lip is caught between his teeth. And with just a few quick thrusts, he's coming undone inside of you. White, hot spurts of cum paint your walls, filling you up and making you feel so unbelievably full.
You've always felt close to Taehyung – he knew everything about you and vice versa; but this time was different. The way his hands settled on your legs, bringing them down gently after finishing. How his eyes are becoming so soft as he looks at you, a lazy grin pulling at his lips. You've never felt closer to Taehyung as you do in the moment. As his body collapses next to yours, pulling you in and holding you close as you recover from your highs, you're completely at peace.
"Sorry I got carried away, I guess I should have asked if you're on birth control still," he laughs, burying his face into the crook of your neck.
"I am," you chuckle alongside him.
Your naked bodies tangle together, his leg weaving its way through yours to be as close to you as possible. He's intoxicated by you, closing his eyes as he rests against your body in complete bliss. Now that he has you this close he never wants to let go; and neither do you.
"Can I tell you something?" His voice is soft, whisper like but still confident. His tone doesn't falter.
"Anything."
"I love you, Y/N."
Butterflies erupt in your tummy, your heart thudding in your chest as heat rises to your cheeks. He loves you. It's not that friendship kind of love anymore; it's the relationship kind. The same kind that makes your heart skip a beat and body riddle with every emotion in the book. The kind that keeps you up all night thinking about – but also helps you fall asleep, knowing he'll be there in the morning.
And all of a sudden it seems so stupid that you were fighting those words back in the heat of the moment just a few minutes ago. He felt it too, you always knew that.
"I love you, Taehyung."
Crush culture once made you want to spill your guts. Every guy sucked, relationships were stupid and love was a social construct that you didn't feel like conforming to. There was absolutely no one that you would waste your time on, until Taehyung came around. What you had been looking for your entire life has always been right in front of your eyes – you were just too dumb to see it.
Maybe love is alright, after all.