*so... um... get ready for some angst in the second half of this chapter. honestly, the last chapter, this chapter and season four is big turning point for rick and cas so get ready for that. as usual for the last few chapters, enjoy some gravity falls references and finally a name drop of a very important gravity falls character, even though i haven't really been hiding who he is. i hope you enjoy because there is only about nine chapters after this one :). this is very, very not edited and sort of rushed btw, i'm sorry.*
"Why are you even here?" Cas asked, sitting on the couch in the living room as she stared at the bright yellow triangle that floated around her dream. The black and white filter covered the living room of the empty Smith house, the only color being Cas herself and the bright yellow glow. The dynamic in her dreams had quickly begun to change. What was one taunting and waking up in screaming, was now simply Cas realizing this was in her head and she controlled what happened. Now, it was like he was a parasite in her head that just wouldn't leave.
"You tell me," Bill Cipher's voice responded. "This is your head after all."
"That's right, you're in my head, after all. So I sort of control what you do?" Cas asked and the entity turned to look at her, his singular eye looking into hers. "And I clearly don't want you here so once again, why are you here?"
"Of course! Don't forget I spent eight years dormant in your head and another handful tormenting you, Andy," His high pitched voice responded. "I know your mind better than you do."
"Can't say I missed that nickname," Cas mumbled. It was a name that only Bill Cipher ever called her. Andy as a play off of her middle name, Andromeda. Back when Cas viewed the being as a simply imaginary friend when she was child, she was delighted by the name. Now, it sent a nervous feeling into her stomach and all throughout her body. "My powers have grown a lot since we last met, Bill. I think I have my own mind on lock by now."
"Are you sure about that?" If he could grin, Cas would imagine the grin in his face rivaling that of Cheshire Cat in that moment. "I know every inch of your mind, Andy. Every doubt you have about Rick Sanchez. How much you still care for your father despite his lack of caring for you. Your deep fear of your own abilities. You can't hide a single thought from me, even when I'm dead." Bill Cipher cackled and Cas glared towards him, clenching her jaw at the first thing he listed.
"Wow. I'm so scared," Cas mumbled sarcastically. "Like we've both said, you're in my head. You can't scare me," Cas shrugged.
"Then why am I still here?" Bill's voice taunted before snapping his fingers.
Cas woke up rather calmly after that, shaking her head slightly to get the sound of his laughter from her head. She was sitting on the couch, her head previously resting on Rick's shoulder. Rick snored next to her, leaning back into the couch with his mouth slightly open and his feet kicked up on the coffee table. One arm was around Cas' shoulder and the other rested on the couch with the remote still in his hands. "Every doubt you have about Rick Sanchez," still rang through her head as she looked at Rick. Her stomach only filled to the brim with nerves as the phrase went through her brain.
Cas forced a small smile onto her face, turning back to focus on the tv and leaning her head back on to his shoulder.
"So you're mining stuff to craft with and crafting stuff to mine with?" Rick asked, a glass of pure gin in a martini glass as he watched Morty play Minecraft. Cas watched from her seat on his lap, a martini glass filled with Sprite and the tiniest splash of gin. Cas could hold her alcohol fairly well and even used it as a tactic early on to get Rick impressed by her, but since then, she chose to drink as little alcohol as she could. She did, however, enjoy the game that Morty had been so captured by in the past few days. "Did your dad write this game?" Rick asked after Morty confirmed Rick's first question.
"It's actually a fun game, darlin'. Kind of relaxing really," Cas shrugged, taking a sip of her Sprite.
Cas cocked her head to the side as she heard the sound of helicopter blades whirring outside the house. Rick rose his brow mid sip before getting up to answer the door, Cas a few steps ahead of him and Morty behind him, a confused look on his face as well. Rick opened the door to see two Secret Service men running up the front door with a black helicopter behind them on the street. Cas took another sip of her drink as the two men began to speak.
"Gentlemen, you're needed by a friend in Washington!" One of them shouted over the helicopter.
"DC or state?" Cas asked with a cheeky grin, earning a slight annoyed look from the same Secret Service man that spoke up. "How clandestine," Rick said bluntly with a joking smile on his face as well. He pulled out his portal gun, shooting a portal under Morty's feet. Cas grinned widely, putting a hand over her glass before jumping in the portal.
"Mr. President," Morty greeted as Cas did a mocking salute with a fake serious look.
"It's about time, gentlemen-" The President began and Cas furrowed her brow at that.
"So, do people just forget I'm here or...?" Cas trailed off making the President clear his throat with an annoyed look.
"It's about time, gentlemen and lady," He corrected. "Do you both need to drink in here?" He asked, looking towards Rick who was taking a sip of his drink and Cas, who held her glass between her fingers.
"Yes," Rick replied quickly.
"Here's the adventure. Some kind of alien... googa has infested the Kennedy Sex Tunnels. I want it hunted down and taken out," The President explained, making Cas grimace at the name slightly. "Naturally, you'll forget you saw them along with, in order of national embarrassment, the Truman Cocaine Lounge, the McKinley Hooker Dump, and the Lincoln Slave Coliseum. He didn't free them all," The President listed off.
"You know, you could have just given us fake names for the rooms to avoid 'national embarrassment'," Cas pointed out with air quotes.
"Just... let me know when you're done," The President sighed, making Cas smile with false politeness
"Maybe then we could get a selfie?" Morty asked with a hopeful smile.
"Too busy, Morty," The President brushed off before turning around and walking away.
"Man, he really doesn't like me," Cas mumbled.
Later, Cas walked through the tunnels next to Rick and Morty, a bored look on her face as she did so. She had crossed her arms, preventing herself from gripping on to Rick's coat sleeve as they walked. Bill Cipher's voice in her head still rang as silence filled the air between the trio. Rick's words about Beth leaving and finding herself if she so desired had gotten to her more than she cared to admit. He was right when he said why she often hide her intelligence and yet, Cas still felt so stupid to even allow the thought of doubting Rick cross her mind. Yet, she shook her head slightly to get rid of the thought as Rick pulled his blaster out to shoot the creature in the tunnel.
"Ugh, this sucks," He mumbled.
"God, tell me about it," Morty replied with an equally annoyed tone. "Yeah, I'm really freaking bored," Cas agreed.
"Oh, man, if you're both not into it-" Rick started.
"What do you mean? Why would we be into it?" Cas asked, "This place is so boring. I honestly expected the secret White House rooms and shit to be so much more exciting. It's not even worth telling Summer about later," Cas grumbled, running a hand through her hair.
"It's lame," Morty added.
"Well, you're into lame stuff, Morty," Rick defended. "I thought young, dumb people considered it an honor to work for Presidents or whatever the shit."
"Maybe the first few times. I mean, Cas is right. The idea of seeing the White House's secret rooms was cool but... this just sucks," Morty replied, motioning around them. "He treats us like Ghostbusters," Rick vented.
"Yeah, that movie was just as boring as this 'adventure'," Cas commented.
"We should talk to him," Morty suggested.
"Yeah, that sounds fun. Let's set some boundaries with a spoiled control freak that thinks he runs the world and orders drone strikes to cope with his insecurity." Rick argued back, to which Morty pointed out it was that or just keeping walking aimlessly through the halls. "Third choice... Minecraft," Rick said as he shot a portal into the wall next to Cas.
"You like it now?" Morty asked happily.
"Gotta be honest, Morty. It's growing on me," Rick replied as the walked through the portal.
"You can use that wood to make a chest, darlin'," Cas pointed out, sitting on her calves next to Rick with her side leaning against the couch. Cas was never big into technology besides her phone but when Morty showed her the game, she actually enjoyed it more than she expected too. It was oddly relaxing for her and whenever Morty asked, she'd happily watch him play or play with. It gave them something to do together that didn't always involve Rick, mostly because he'd sleep next to Cas as they played on the couch. "Ironic I'm telling you how to make a chest and I barely have one myself," Cas joked quietly, which made Rick snort.
"Oh, good. Then I can store all this wood I'll need later for chest making," Rick mocked slightly which made Cas roll her eyes with a slight smile.
"You're not gonna have fun if you analyze everything," Morty pointed out.
"Is this game popular with autistic people?" Rick suddenly asked as he used a pickaxe on a tree, Cas quickly correctly him to use just an axe instead.
"Why would you say something like that?" Morty asked, raising one eyebrow and looking up from his phone.
"'Cause I'm starting to love it," Rick grinned as Morty's face perked up at that. Cas smiled at the two, using her abilities to float her can of soda into her hands, taking a small sip before putting it back on the coffee table. She glanced over at the sound of Morty's phone vibrating to see his eyebrows furrow at the contact screen that showed the seal for the President's office.
"'Failure the answer is a felony offense'?" Morty read off from the screen of his phone.
"Play it cool. As far as he knows, we're still in the tunnels," Rick told Morty, turning away from the laptop screen for a brief moment. Cas flicked two of her fingers towards the screen, moving Rick's avatar around with just her abilities. He gave her an annoyed look and she grinned innocently as Morty answered the phone. "Yellow?" Rick said, focusing back on the game as Morty put the phone on speaker.
"Hi, guys and Cas. U.S. President calling. How's it going?" The President's voice came through.
"Oh, hey. Just hard at work on this sex tunnel gagoo," Rick replied. "I think it's kind of our new arch-nemesis, you know? It might take a while. What do you think, Morty, Cas? A month?"
"Fingers crossed," Morty replied, giving Rick a thumbs up. "Sounds about right, darlin'," Cas added, leaned forward to rest her elbow on Rick's shoulder.
"You lying dicks! I see your asses playing Minecraft! I got you on satellite!" The President exclaimed, "That's right. What do you have to say for yourselves?" The President asked, his tone now slightly calmer.
"Okay, obviously, this looks bad, Mr. President," Morty tried.
"I mean, what doesn't look bad through an illegal spy satellite?" Rick added which made Cas give a look of agreement at that.
"Don't high-road me. The three of you break a thousand federal laws a day and Cas isn't even fully of this Earth. Her citizenship here is something we can easily discuss," The President told them and Cas rose her brow at that as both Rick and Morty seemed impressed by their breaking of federal laws.
"What are you gonna do? Deport me to a planet I have no idea about?" Cas asked in an annoyed tone.
"And, yes, yes, yes, you save the world now and then. America returns that favor by not holding the three of you accountable to its laws," The President began to explain. An amused look came across the trio's faces as they did their best to hold off laughter. Cas found it honestly amusing that the President would even bring up Cas' undetermined half of her species and that it was some how a favor of not attempting to 'discuss' it all.
"Oh! Oh, god, we - we didn't know you saw it that way," Rick said in a mocking voice.
"Well, it's nobody's fault. We never had 'the talk' so to speak," The President replied.
"Yeah. The way we see it is showing up is the favor to you, Pres," Cas replied. "Especially, you know, when it turns out you wanted someone to cover over just because you found an 'X-Files' monster in your basement." Morty added on with a smirk.
"As for the reason you've never, like, arrested us or 'discussed' my girlfriend's species, we assumed you just knew the first was impossible and the neither wouldn't go well for anyone." Rick chuckled, the sound of his laughter making Cas chuckle as well as she reached over to mess with the short hairs on the back of his neck.
"Wouldn't go well? Can you elaborate?"
"I think one of your thousand laws says, no, I can't elaborate. Just trust me. None of us want to go there. Cas isn't always just annoying, she can fuck shit up," Rick warned. Cas clicked her tongue, making a finger gun with her free hand and winking at Rick.
"Which we'll never have too," Morty spoke up. "By the way, we'll keep on saving Earth. You know, we're - we're happy to do that."
"Yeah, but not because it contains America - because moving to a new version of Earth is a bitch and a half," Rick interrupted.
"Feel free to call us as friends though!" Cas jumped in.
"Yeah, like, if you ever want to take a selfie-" Rick tried, making Morty elbow him slightly and glare. "So, are we cool?" Morty asked, carefully.
"Yes. Thank you, gentlemen and lady." The President said before hanging up.
"I told you, man!" Morty smiled, referring to when he suggested just talking to the President earlier. "Way to go, Morty," Cas said, holding her fist out to fist bump him, which he accepted with a smile.
"I'm impressed, Morty. That went really well," Rick complimented with a grin.
Not long later, Cas sat on the couch still watching as Rick and Morty used Rick's VR headsets to play his version of Minecraft. She twirled the green headband above her fingers, green wisps coating her hands as she scrolled through her phone with her other hand. "Ooh! A tiny nuclear-capable species just got discovered in the Amazon. Let's go make first contact before someone else gets all their shit," Rick said, pulling his headset off, breaking Cas' attention to her phone.
"What about this?" Morty asked.
"South Park did 4 years ago, Morty," Rick replied as he stood up, Cas behind him.
"They're fast," Morty commented.
"Or, we're just slow," Cas shrugged.
"Don't do it, guys," Rick said as the three stepped out of the ship after the landed in the jungle of Brazil. "That casualties would be in the 'Brazilians'," Rick tried to joke and Cas just rose an eyebrow at that. Rick glanced around for reactions for a moment before speaking again, "It's a threat and a pun. Nobody gets me," Rick mumbled.
"No, I get you. It was just a bad pun and I'm pretty sure they speak Portuguese," Cas replied. Cas went to speak to the soldiers before one man emerged from the woods, calling off the forces. They all jumped in their trucks, driving off quickly as the whirring of a helicopter was heard. Cas quickly pulled Rick and Morty out the way as the ground began to rumble and she could feel the metal of the large tanks coming closer, knocking down trees. "Now, that's not very environmentally friendly," Cas shook her head.
Soldiers emerged from the tanks, a few pointed guns at the three. Rick glanced over at Cas as if silently asking if she could take care of them when the time arose and she nodded subtly as men began to slid down ropes from the helicopters. They worked together, making a large archway that then turned a into a bright blue portal, where the President and a few others stepped through, making both Cas and Rick raise a brow. "Oh, hello, Rick. You're here, too. I guess this is a global crisis."
"Oh, god," Rick mumbled. "Mr. President, Morty, Cassie and I have the situation covered."
"I'm sure you did," The President smirked. "Dismissed," He said and turned around.
"Dismissed?" Cas asked, furrowing her brows.
"Yeah, dismissed. Not needed here. You can leave and nobody will care. Have you never heard that before?" The President tried to mock and Cas let out a small chuckle, earning a glare her way.
"Do you even know how to take out this kind of threat?" Rick asked.
"We're not taking it out. We're going to shrink down and approach them diplomatically," The President said and snapped his fingers. A man in a lab coat stepped up next to him, opening a brief case that showed eight small pills and a tiny little ship inside. Each of the people behind the President grabbed a pill as they passed the briefcase around.
"You shrink with pills?" Rick asked, an amused look on his face.
"Are you still here? Shouldn't you be going down to your next version of Earth with you annoying alien girlfriend and your selfie-craving star-fucker sidekick?" The President snapped and Cas rolled her eyes at the poor insult.
"Half alien," Cas corrected as Morty let out a small 'whoa'.
"We're allowed to be here. You aren't President of the Amazon," Rick pointed out. "Yeah, I learned about your job in school and from Cas. You're a civil servant. We're technically your boss!" Morty added on.
"When's the last time a President had actually paid attention to the people though, Morty?" Cas mumbled, earning a few more glares, which she smiled innocently in response to.
"Oh, please, Morty. You pay as many taxes as you have pubes," The President fired back, ignoring Cas' comment.
"Oh, I got pubes, Commander-in-Queef," Morty replied and Cas snorted loudly as Rick gave an impressed look. "Y-You wanna count 'em?" Morty snapped, motioning to his crotch.
"Commander-in-Queef," Rick echoed and laughed loudly.
"That's it! Do it!" The President shouted and three soldiers stepped up, encasing Cas and Rick's hands with metal and handcuffing Morty. Cas could feel that it was just simple metal she could easily get out of in a heartbeat but she waited to do so. "Recognize the rare element Sanchez-eum? We've been preparing for a Rick-level eventuality for some time. Not even Cas can use the metal," The President taunted and Cas had to hold back her smirk.
"You mean, you've been ordering other people to prepare for it while you sat on your ass at peace summits," Morty argued and Cas and Rick shared a quick amused glance.
"Peace summits are important!"
"Oh, yeah! They work great! We're really drowning in peace! You suck!"
"You suck!" The President fired back, "Task Force Alpha, prepare to shrink." The President ordered.
"Is there a Task Force Alpha health plan, by the way?" Rick spoke up, "Because of those pills are based on subatomic compression, you could get a more curable just walking through the mushroom clouds," Rick told them. The others behind the President shared worried glances, before the President snatched a pill from one of them angrily, announcing he'd do it himself before swallowing it.
"Yikes," Cas whispered. "And I thought you had a fragile ego," Cas looked up at Rick.
"Task Force Alpha is disbanded. And you three aren't American anymore! I can say that! You're expatriated! If you step foot on homeland soil again, I'll treat it as an invasion!" The President announced as he shrunk slowly, his clothes not shrinking with him and high voices pitch raising. "Is this supposed to be painful?"
"Painful to watch," Cas commented.
"I know, Cassie, such lame shrinking," Rick chuckled.
"His clothes stay the same size? Uh, '70s shrinking, party of one," Morty teased, looking down at the President. Cas couldn't hear his high pitched response but watching his small body begin to run towards the tiny ship, which flew off.
"There he goes," Rick commented. "Alright. Let's get out of here, Cas," Rick said and Cas nodded. A small burst of green energy came from inside the encasement around her hands, widening the holes to allow her hands to be free. She did the same to Rick's, who then used his blaster to shoot the handcuffs off of Morty's hands. "I made Sanchez-eum up, dumbasses. Don't believe everything you read on Wikipedia." Rick said when he noticed the shocked faces on the General's in front the them.
"Stand down. He's not afraid of pirates," The female General said as a bunch of people dressed as pirates emerged from around them.
"Oh! Run, Morty! That part was true!" Rick shouted, pushing Cas and Morty forward before shooting a portal.
After a while of spending quite a bit of time playing a game of cards in some alien bar that Rick brought them and a couple world leaders to, Cas slumped back in her seat as she watched Rick talk on the phone while he messed around with the bong in his hands. Cas declined the drugs, focusing on the deck in her hands, placing a card down which made it Rick's turn. As she watched him take a rather large puff from the bong, Cas seemed to allow the situation as a whole sink in. The table in front of her was reflective slightly but it showed enough for Cas to look down, not really recognizing who was staring back up at her.
"I know every inch of your mind, Andy. Every doubt you have about Rick Sanchez," Once again echoed through her brain. Cas placed her deck down for a moment, sliding out the booth with out a word as Rick hung up the phone with Beth. "W-Where you goin', Cassie? We're in the middle of a round?" Rick asked, looking up at Cas from his seat.
"I-I just need some air," Cas said quickly, leaving the bar without another word. Rick glanced over at Morty in confusion, who shrugged slightly in response.
Outside, Cas tugged her jacket tighter around her shoulders as she stood in the cold air. Her eyes were shut tightly before they snapped open at the sound of a high pitched voice. "Miss me already, Andy?" The voice of Bill Cipher said as the black and white filter covered the terrain around her and the familiar triangular being appeared behind her.
"What did you mean about me doubting Rick?" Cas snapped, turning around to face him.
"Ooh, we're jumping right into it, huh? You don't want to warm up with you abandonment issues or the ever untouched root of your problems actually being about your mother?" Bill's voice teased with laughter and Cas tensed up at that, glaring towards the triangle before her.
"You're clearly my subconscious conjuring something to try and tell me something I don't realize. What is it and what does it have to do with Rick?" Cas snapped again and Bill gave a dramatic sigh before deciding to respond. Cas' fists were clenched tightly, green wisps coating them and the veins up her arms beginning to glow a bright shade of green, slowly creeping higher as her anger level rose.
"What do you think I'm here for? You're doubting the most important person in your life so you've decide to go back to the one person who's never truly lied to you, Andy." Bill's voice said, "I never lied to you. Can you say the same thing about Rick? I never used you for your abilities. Can you say the same for Rick? I gave you a voice and purpose on my side. Can you say the same for Rick? I mean, he does have the ability to remove memories. Who's to say he never used that on you?" The figure in front of him was quick to disappear, the black and white filter escaping as the sound of Cas' name being shouted filled her ears.
"Cassie!" Rick said, shaking her shoulders.
Cas' eyes snapped open with a small, shaky gasp as she was met with the concerned look in Rick's brown iris'. Morty stood just a few steps behind him, a bright green glow next to him as a portal was waiting for them. "Sorry, I-I just... I guess I zoned out." Cas furrowed her brows, looking down at her hands that were completely normal. She clenched and unclenched her fists, the green wisps appearing as her hands opened. She looked up to see Rick, furrowing his brow in concern but she quickly out her hands down, the wisps disappearing and plastering a smile on her face. "Let's go," She said with a forced happy tone before moving around Rick to jump into the portal.
"God damn it! They're right here!" The President shouted out as he opened the door to reveal Rick and Morty sitting on the couch and Cas on the arm of the couch in the Oval Office. Rick had a bowl of popcorn in his lap and Morty had his laptop in his own. With that, a bunch of Secret Service men began to fill the room, all pointing weapons towards the trio on the couch. Rick handed the bowl to Cas as he stood up.
"Everybody relax. Just waiting for you in the only room you can't blow up or spy on," Rick said as he dusted his hands off. "So, we're not changing timelines for you, but now you have everything you want, so you can forget we exist and we'll return the favor." Rick explained with a clearly bored tone of voice.
"You couldn't say that in a text?" The President asked.
"Well, since we won't be seeing each other again, my-" Rick stopped himself mid sentence before looking around the room. "Guys, we get it. It's a Code Red. Enough," Rick mumbled before turning back to the President and crossing his arms. "My grandson has worked hard for you and I feel like he's earn a selfie. Also, no more threats to deport my girlfriend to another planet, which you technically can't do."
"Honestly, I could take it or leave it at this point," Morty shrugged.
"You're taking it," Rick snapped.
"No. What kind of fratty-ass status move is that? Get out of my office!" The President argued back and Cas rolled her eyes, setting the bowl of popcorn on to the couch as she stood up.
"Seriously? You're that stubborn?" Morty asked as he shut his laptop.
"He's the stubborn one. I'm protecting my country," The President crossed his arms in response.
"Uh, from selfies?" Rick asked.
"From subordination to hostile powers!"
"Uh, does China know about that deal-breaker?"
"China doesn't piss on the White House," The President response with a glare towards Rick.
"Well, why would they? I'm sure it was expensive," Rick fired back and Cas sighed deeply. "Rick, can't we just go? It's not even worth it anymore. I want to go home and we just mock shitty infomercials with you and forget about this," She tried but Rick ignored her.
"Listen to your girlfriend and get out," the President said.
"Not without a selfie," Rick responded and Cas sighed once more as the General behind the President ordered for the three to be arrested. "Son, you have the right to refuse his order, and I guarantee you're going to die if you touch me, and there's no afterlife. Everything just goes black. Don't do it," Rick warned as one of the men stepped forward. The man hesitated before touching Rick's arm and then collapsing.
"Rick!" Cas exclaimed, her eyes widening.
"Okay. What was that?" The President asked, a scared look on his face now.
"Death," Rick responded bluntly.
"What kind?"
"Instant," Rick responded with the same tone and annoyed look.
"There was no sound. He just died," The President exclaimed as he looked down at the now dead body in the middle of the Oval Office. Cas looked down at Morty with a shocked look on her face, Morty's matching hers.
"Yeah, terrifying," Rick shrugged, nonchalantly. "It's a terrifying thing to watch happen. It's called a deterrent."
"You couldn't just knock him out?" Cas asked, looking back towards her boyfriend, who looked at her with half his brow raised and a slightly shocked look on his face that left rather quickly. "This was fun for a while, Rick, but come on. Let's just go home already."
"How is knocking out a deterrent, Cassie? Everybody wants to be knocked out. Nobody wants to be dead," Rick explained with another nonchalant shrug which made Cas huffed in response. "We can't go home," Rick added.
"You committed murder in the Oval Office. Not you can't leave," The President corrected.
"That's fine. I said I'm not leaving without a selfie," Rick said, walking back to the couch. He picked up the bowl of popcorn again, leaning on the arm of the couch next to Cas, who had taken his seat next to Morty.
"Uh, I don't need a selfie," Morty spoke up.
"And I'm saying you aren't getting one and you aren't leaving," The President agreed.
"So, we agree?" Rick smirked, popping a piece of popcorn into his mouth.
"Yes. No, we disagree," The President corrected himself. "Because you think you're getting a selfie," He explained and Cas leaned back in the couch, watching the argument form with an annoyed look on her face. Morty sat next to her, looking up at her and seemingly connecting the dots that her annoyance wasn't with the situation but more so with how Rick was choosing the handle it.
"Am I getting a selfie?"
"Never."
"Then I'm not leaving," Rick confirmed with a smile and tossed another piece of popcorn into his mouth.
"Does anyone have a shot?" The same General from earlier spoke up.
"Yes, nine people. I can show you," Rick said and pressed a button on his watch. Red lasers appeared for a brief moment showing all the areas on his body that a shot could be fired. "But I wouldn't recommend-" Rick began only to be cut off by the General announcing to open fire. The shots only hit the small force field Rick had around him, a few of them ricocheting off and hitting the person that shot them. Cas was quick to cover herself and Morty from getting shot with a small, green force field of her own. "You guys are dumb," Rick groaned.
"Get the President out of here!" The female General from earlier shouted.
"Bad idea," Rick said. "Because if there isn't someone here that they're not supposed to kill, they're gonna wreck the place trying to kill me. As long as you live, no matter where you are, if it isn't in a selfie with him, I'll be here."
"Jesus! He's not a fucking god!
"You don't know what I am! And you don't know what I can do!" Rick snapped and Cas was quick to stand to her feet again.
"Rick, chill. Morty doesn't even want the selfie anymore. Just let it go," Cas told him but was ignored once more.
"I'm Doctor Who in this motherfucker. I could be a clone. I could be a hologram. We could all be clones controlled by robots controlled with special headsets that the real Rick and Morty are wearing while they're fucking your mother!" Rick snapped loudly which made Cas sit down, officially giving up on trying to calm Rick. He rarely listened anyways and it was often like talking to a brick wall when it came to him.
"I'm going to kill you!" The General shouted back.
"Then come to 312 Olive Street!" Rick yelled back, making the General ask if that was her address. "You don't know because you're a bad son!" Rick said back, only to be stopped by the President using the phone on his desk hit him across the face. Rick groaned in pain at that and Cas quickly grabbed Morty, jumped behind the couch with him as Rick used the blue laser on his watch for the last few Service men that were in the room. The President has leaped onto his desk, using the end of the flag pole to point at Rick.
"Come on, Morty," Cas said, grabbing Morty by the wrist and running out the balcony while Rick was distracted. "Let's go get back to your family," Cas swiped the portal gun that had fallen from Rick's coat off the ground.
"You're leaving Rick behind?" Morty asked and Cas didn't respond to that. She just shot the portal and stepped through to find herself back in the Smith household. Beth sat on the couch talking to Summer with Jerry next to her. "Dad?" Morty asked, furrowing his brows as he looked to his mother for answers.
"Your father and I have agreed to try and start fresh," Beth smiled.
"That's great and all but Rick's pretty pissed about everything right now and we need to go," Cas told them.
They found themselves in a small cabin in the woods that Morty assured was safe from Rick. He was hammering planks of wood to the windows while Cas sat on the floor, leaning her back against the wall. She couldn't even believe how she went from being completely ready to follow Rick into anything to suddenly... almost scared of what he could do. Cas knew that Rick wouldn't be easy to deal with and she felt she had done a fairly decent job at rolling with the punches that came with a relationship with him. She accepted that fact long ago when she decided to finally let herself care for him as more than just a simple acquaintance.
She glanced over at Beth, who was playing a card game with Summer. "Are you okay, Cas?" She heard Summer ask and Cas just shook her head, not elaborating. She was thankful Summer just gave a small look of pity before turning back to her game.
"Rick, don't get mad but Cas stole your portal gun," Morty spoke up and Cas looked up to see him on the phone. "Cas and I told you I didn't want the damn selfie 800 times! Look, whatever the hell is going on between you and Cas and you and the President, it's got nothing to do with me... I can't tell you. Rick, did you tell my mom she might be a clone?" Morty asked and Cas looked over at Beth, knowing full well that Rick didn't know but she did. It was something that he claimed he trusted her with knowing but Cas knew that it was just to later probably shift blame or use as a loophole.
"So, don't look for us..." Morty said after a short conversation about Jerry and Beth getting back together. He hung up the phone and tucked it into his pocket. Morty glanced over at Cas, who now tucked her knees up to her chest. She looked deep in thought but Morty grabbed two water bottles from their small stash and sat down next to her. "Y-You know, whatever is happening with you and Rick, it'll sort out." Morty tried to assure Cas as he handed her a water bottle.
"What do you mean?" Cas asked, taking a sip from the water bottle. "Everything's fine," She added.
"I know we're not super close, Cas, but I can tell when you're stressed. Especially when it has to do with Rick," Morty pointed out. Cas smiled slightly towards Morty, wrapping an arm around his shoulders to pull him into a side hug.
"You know, you remind me a lot of my cousin, Mason. We called him Dipper, though," Cas told Morty. Morty smiled brightly at that, holding his water bottle out in front of her. Cas gave a quiet chuckle, tapping the top of her water bottle against his. It made Cas think of the first few times they had clinked their drinks together like that. Back before the first switched universes when Morty was trying to get advice on how to get Jessica and the two bonded over their 'impossible crushes' and then at the party when Cas urged Morty to go after Jessica. "God damn it," Cas said as she heard the sound of helicopters whirring and she stood up quickly.
"He found us!" Morty shouted, dropping his bottle of water.
"I told you we shouldn't have gone to the same cabin as last time!" Summer shouted and Cas opened the door, stepping out into the porch. When she noticed the large gun in Rick's hand, she allowed the green wisps to kick at her fingers in case.
"We're not going anywhere, this ends now." Beth said sternly and stepped out next to Cas, "Dad, if you're my dad. Of course, you're not my dad. You're here with a gun because I'm a clone. I guess I have all your daughters memories. So I guess I was her, which makes me related to her. But I don't relate to her. She left her family and me, which means I relate to them. So if you kill me, fine. You're not killing her. But you're killing a real family. And instead of doing that, will you just go away? Aren't there like infinite timelines? Can't yoy just move to one where I don't know I'm a clone and where a different identical version of your authentic sociopathic crazy bitch of a daughter can keep making you proud by being somewhere else." Beth finished and Cas looked over at Rick, raising her hands slightly as he raised the gun.
"Beth, you crazy bitch. You're my daughter. I brought this here to kill Jerry," Rick rolled his eyes. Beth and the kids began to hug tightly, celebrating the fact that it was truly Beth. Cas however, stood still next to them. "Yeah, yeah, Jerry. You win. No amount of genius can stop your dumb mediocre vacuous roots from digging into everything and everyone around you and draining them of any ability to fend you off."
"Well, it couldn't have been easy for you to say that," Jerry replied. "I appreciate it."
"Cas, where's my portal gun?" Rick asked, finally turning to his girlfriend. Cas pulled it from her leather jacket without a word and handed it to him. "Let's go, Morty," Rick said, assuming that Cas would be right behind him.
"No," Morty said.
"Are you... ugh," Rick groaned. "Nothing you think matters, matters. This isn't special. This is happening infinite times across infinite realities."
"Including this?" Summer said, trying to joke around as she lifted her leg slightly, letting out a quiet fart.
"Yes!" Rick snapped. "Which is not to say that, subjectively, it wasn't funny."
"Are you going to stay?" Morty asked, glancing to Cas, who was waiting for Rick's response.
"There's infinite timelines, Morty. Why would I stay in the one where I trashed the White House, became an enemy of America and the lowest status character in my idiot family?" Rick asked rhetorically. "C-Come on, Cas," He said and held his hand out and expected her to not hesitate to grab it and jump through a portal with him. Cas bit her lip for a moment and she stepped forward and grabbed his hand but didn't let him lead her through the portal.
"No," Cas whispered to him.
"W-What?" Rick said, slightly shocked and Cas nodded as if she expected him to say that.
"I want to stay here. In this universe. If you want to leave... g-go ahead. If you want to stay, that's great," Cas began. "I've become so wrapped up in this relationship that I kind of lost myself for sometime. I think we kind of both have and it's not what it used to be anymore and I think my subconscious has been trying to tell me that for a while now. I want to make my own decision right now and I'm staying." She finished with a slightly nod and Rick remained still for a moment, just staring into Cas' green eyes with his own brown ones. "Rick... please say something," Cas said, a pit of anxiety beginning to form in her stomach at his silence, a small tear built up in her eyes, falling as she looked up at Rick.
"Whatever," Rick shrugged and the portal behind him closed and Cas almost smiled at that.
"Whatever?" Cas repeated, slightly annoyed by the brush off. "Rick, we need to start talking about the direction our relationship is going, okay? W-What you did today was... insane and I know we've done crazier things but I don't think you did all this just for Morty to get a selfie with the president." Cas pointed out and the family watched awkwardly behind her, sharing a few awkward glances.
"Well, that's exactly why I did it so there's no need to talk about it," Rick shrugged.
"Fine," Cas snapped. "Then don't be surprised if I become the one to leave you."