"Welcome to your life. There's no turning back--" Everybody Wants to Rule the World by Lorde
Two months later...
Kender Thomas, rebel fighter. I rolled my eyes at the comical tone of my thoughts. My name sounded like a soft-core stripper, not a rebel. At least the 'fighter' part is right.
Here I was. Alone in the room I used to share with Harper because it was all I had left of her. None of us had even been able to see her since he'd taken her. Momma called it a 'honeymoon' period we had to endure, but two months was too long.
Honeymoon? They weren't even married. He bought her.
The spider-web cracks in the mirror distorted my pale face as I pulled the holey black beanie cap over my head. Tucking the stray pieces of my dark purple hair behind my ears, I wrinkled my nose and leaned closer, inspecting my skin. Smudges of dirt covered my right cheek and streaked along the column of my throat. Sighing, I pulled on the sleeve of my gray sweater, and wiped the remnants of dirt off. The hard scrubbing caused a pale pinkish tint on one cheek; it almost made me look clean. I tried to make my other cheek match but the sudden onslaught of tears blurred my vision and I turned away from the mirror.
I hated crying, but it was happening a lot lately.
I stumbled towards Harper's bed and collapsed on the caving mattress, the squeal of rusted springs ringing in my ear. I hunched over my knees, and focused on catching my breath. Thinking about Harper hurt. It hurt most of the time. Some days were better than others. Some days I could distract myself. Today wasn't one of those day.
The gentle knock at the door kept me from hyperventilating further.
"Kender?" a small voice asked.
I exhaled and straightened, ironing out non-existent wrinkles from my sweater with my hands. I couldn't let Ember hear me panicking... or crying. The light sting of tears against my cheeks hinted that my eyes were puffing up. I quickly fanned my face with both hands, hoping a little cold air would stop the swelling.
"What is it, Em?" I asked.
"I had a bad dream," my ten-year-old sister whispered through the crack at the bottom of the door.
My heart warmed, and I could just make out the chubby curve of her pink cheek as she pushed it against the floor trying to peek into my room. I rested my cheek against my knee, watching the tips of her fingers tapping the floor.
"Are you gonna open the door or just stare at it?" Ember asked, her tiny, high-pitched voice impatient.
I hated turning her down, but I had things to do. "Not tonight, Em. I got a job."
"Another one?" she whined. "Ooh, will you bring chocolate back?"
My tongue darted out, tasting salty tears in the creases of my lips. Chocolate was expensive... too expensive. I could only afford a small piece once every few months unless I wanted to max my credit. "I'll try, but no promises, okay?"
"My birthday's coming up. Maybe Momma will bring another pastry home from Börek like she did for Parker's birthday."
My mouth watered. I remembered that night like it was yesterday. It was the first time any of us kids ever tried chocolate. I could still feel the warm pastry glaze clinging to the tips of my fingers as the creamy milk chocolate - Momma called it pudding - almost dripped out.
"Are you going to share it like Parker did?" I asked playfully.
Instead of keeping it all to herself, Parker had cut the six-inch dessert into five sections. Four equal pieces were passed out to me, Ember, Harper, and herself. The fifth and biggest piece she gave to Spenser. He didn't have the heart to tell her it would make him sick, but he ate it anyway. Spenser spent that entire night throwing up in the toilet.
"Um... maybe?" Ember said.
"Was that a question?"
Ember stayed silent.
I smacked my lips together and smiled. "Maybe."
"Kender, will you sing to me before you leave? You have time for one, don't you?"
"Nice way to change the subject kid." Pushing my glasses up my nose, I stood and walked to open the door. Ember was belly down on the floor. Her heart-shaped face was cradled in the palms of her hands, and her curly, wheat-blonde hair fell into her gray eyes.
She smiled widely up at me, fluttering her eyelashes. "Please?"
I smirked. "One song," I said, giving in to her puppy-dog eyes. "The usual?"
Ember tapped her chin, scrunching her lips as she pretended to think about it, but I knew what she'd choose in the end. "Yes!"
Together, we walked to the hide-away door underneath the stairs. There was no handle. The door looked like just another piece of the dirt colored wallpaper. When the war finished in 2028 the famous people - who'd spoken out against the New World Order - had been shut-down artistically. Songs they performed, movies they'd been in, even coined phrases, were considered illegal paraphernalia. In 2030 the new power fully settled in, and a third of celebrity A-listers were shot in the head because they couldn't be swayed. It was a live broadcast from Times Square and Hollywood. It was the very reason Dad built a hidden room underneath the stairs that expanded so it stretched through the walls of our house. We only visited the room once a month - for safety reasons - but since I might never see my family again, I could make an exception. I couldn't risk anyone from the outside hearing me sing.
"I want some Cheerios," Ember said, skipping with joy towards the boxes Dad managed to smuggle in.
"Just a handful."
They were stale and dusty from age, but the tiny O's were a treat to all of us. I walked past the framed last words of some of Momma and Dads favorite artists. I struck a match and lit the red candle that sat next to five rows of movies made by Sony. The flicker of the flame's shadow and a metallic glint from the dusty packets of Trojan condoms danced over the wall.
By the time I was twelve I had all of the banned artists songs memorized. I could mimic the grit of rock. I had the breath for rap. R & B and country I was a little iffy on, but still had to sing them anyway. Everyone had a personal favorite too. For Dad, Ember, and Parker it was the famous pop artist, Ginger Stone. For Momma it was the rock band Xist. She still believes the bands lead singer, Cal Donahue, is alive because he disappeared two days before the mass shootings. The rest of us, me included, were more eclectic with our tastes.
I shook my head as I knelt down beside Ember while she munched. I ran my hand across her forehead and started singing softly next to her ear. By the time I finished, Ember had dozed off and was struggling to stay up right. I reached forward and tucked a curl behind her ear before tugging on her arms. Her gray eyes popped open but drooped shut just as fast. Eventually, I managed to pull her to a sitting position and coaxed her tiny arms around my neck to lift her up. Her legs wrapped around my waist, holding me in a tight hug as I exited the hide-away room and walked across the hall to the room she shared with Parker.
"Here, I'll take her."
My shoulders sank as I turned to see my dad walking from the living room, his arms outstretched. My smile was quick as I shuffled Ember into his arms and pushed my glasses up my nose again.
"Thanks."
I fiddled with the loose yarns at the hem of my turtle-neck sweater. Offering a nod, I turned towards my room.
"Kender-"
Stiffening, I paused, my forehead mere inches away from my door. I rested my hand on the doorknob. Oh please, don't make me leaving harder... "Yeah?"
I knew if I spoke to him too long I would lose my nerve for what I had to do. I'd already told them this would be a long job, that I didn't want any goodbyes. I couldn't show up with tears streaking down my cheeks, especially for this particular job.
"Be careful, baby. Wǒ ài nǐ," Dad said.
My head nodded before I was even aware of it. My fingertips tingled and my heart thumped. Sinking my teeth into my bottom lip, I wanted to tell him everything so badly, about what I did... about what I have to do now because of it. That it all started from a desperate need to free Harper from that sicko.
I just wanted to save Harper.
I could tell him, but I also didn't want to disappoint him. I'd committed a crime after all. I had trespassed on Hayden Marks property three times. I tried to steal Harper back. I don't know what I'd been thinking.
No, I hadn't been thinking, and Hayden got everything on tape. He could send me to prison for life if he wanted to, or worse, he could traffic Harper. He said he wouldn't so long as I cooperated, and that's what I was going to do.
Bracing myself, I turned to look at my dad. His gray eyes softened. Crinkles winkled his forehead as he frowned. The similarities between him and Ember were uncanny. "Daddy, I love you more," I said, letting out a tiny gasp when I finished. If I hadn't been digging my nails into my palms I was sure my voice would've trembled.
He smiled a deep, warm grin that lit up the room. "I assure you, that's not possible," he said and reached for Ember's door knob, but stopped and turned back towards me.
No. No, no, no...
"Kender, if you ever need help on this job, don't hesitate to call us."
"I-I won't. Goodnight. Give Parker and Momma an extra kiss for me... you know how I feel about saying goodbye. Oh, and tell Spenser-" I paused making sure what I said next wouldn't give anything away. "Tell him that everything is going to be fine."
He frowned. His already sad eyes looking more troubled as he tilted his head. "Kiddo, that sounds like a goodbye. You sure this job isn't too dangerous for you? Having a black belt doesn't mean you're invincible. Back when I was young..."
If I didn't stop him he'd go on forever. "Dad, I gotta go."
He nodded, holding a hand up to stop me. "Of course, I know. Do I need to speak with your boss though? Have him ease up on you a little bit? You can't carry the weight of the world on your shoulders all the time."
I shrugged. "I redistribute it on occasion. Besides, if I can't carry the weight of it, how do you expect me to rule it? I'll be fine." With a smirk, I pointed at my chest with my thumbs. "This girl is gonna rule the world someday."
He chuckled and bowed his head. "Okay. Okay, I get the point."
I watched as he went into Ember's room. My heart hurt as I heard Ember's muffled voice. "Daddy, does she have to go?"
Dad shut the door, probably not wanting me to hear what he said. My dad was a smart man. I forced a smile as I bent down to slip on my buckled combat boots. Thirty-four years and two months ago today, the New World Order took over.
The people thought they'd wanted the changes. It was a slow seduction of danger, sex, and power. Most Hollywood celebrities pushing the idea didn't have a clue. Only a few really knew the path the world was heading, and the ones who found out ended up dead. Car accidents. Drug overdoses. Drive-by shootings. Plane crashes. Now, fourteen men, two from each of the seven continents rule the world, but it's a big world, and people are still fighting. I didn't think I would be a part of that fight, but after tonight, things would never be the same again.
Change was dancing in the air, and sometimes, change sucked.
----
Wǒ ài nǐ - I love you.