I was sat cleaning in between the nozzles on my mixing desk with headphones around my neck blasting Little Mix's music when Maddie knocked on my door and walked right in. She sat on my bed and crossed her legs.
I sarcastically looked to my door and called "Who's there? Oh hello Maddie, yes come right in, please!"
"Shut up Jakob." Maddie sighed.
I switched the music off and sat facing her on the bed.
"Do you ever stop listening to those women?"
"No." I smiled. "You should stop having a go and actually listen to them properly one day."
"I'm not here to talk about Little Mix Jake."
"I know."
"I want to know about mum."
"Why?" I asked. "Why all of a sudden are so interested in her?"
"I dunno! I've been thinking about her for ages now, more than ever... I just want to know why she left, is that so awful."
"No... I don't even know myself, I-"
"But you think you do." Maddie pushed. "I just want to know something, I'm sick of knowing nothing."
I started biting my nails. Maddie did the same. "I was only five..." I said slowly. "But I remember them arguing all the time about money."
Maddie leaned forwards slightly, resting her chin in the palm of her hand.
"I just remember dad was working all the hours under the sun, I think at one point he had three jobs... Obviously she was here looking after us lot... But he'd come home and they'd just fight all the time."
"How d'you remember if you were only five?"
"Yeah... But it's not something you forget too easily."
Maddie shuffled forward on the bed a tiny bit. "What about when she left?"
I nodded. "I watched her go."
Maddie just waited.
"I remember their arguing waking me up... I heard them outside and went to the window and she was walking off with her bags. Dad was devastated, he kept shouting that he'd try harder and he'd get another job. He said he'd do anything. But she still went."
"You really remember that?"
"Like I said, it's hard to forget." I shrugged. "You weren't even one then." I added softly.
"And... What? She never came back? Not even once?"
"That was the last I saw of her."
Maddie was silent for a minute, and then she said. "Where d'you think she is now?"
I swung my legs off the bed and went back and sat at my mixing desk. "I don't know Maddie, and I don't care. Dad raised us. Maybe you should concentrate on treating him with a bit more respect. You know, appreciate the parent that stuck by us rather than waste time on thinking about the one who walked out on us."
I expected Maddie to kick off then. I kind of wanted her to; I wasn't used to deep, intimate conversations with my sister and it had made me uncomfortable. She was the one I was used to arguing with, so this kind of conversation was a bit surreal. But she didn't make a sound. I heard my bed creak as she got off it and thought she was leaving. Then all of a sudden she wrapped her arms around my shoulders and gave me a tight hug. It was so unexpected and I jumped slightly.
"Thanks Jake." She muttered and she practically ran from the room.
Once I got over the shock, I lay on my bed and tried to get up the courage to actually send the message I had been writing, deleting and rewriting to Perrie since that afternoon.
Jacubbear900: You'd think you have better things to do with your time than to give people mini heart attacks 😋 Why are you so eager to see this tattoo anyways? 😅 xxx
I set my phone down, but to my surprise it buzzed again only a minute or two later, and I had to suppress an unusual high squeal as another message from Perrie came through. She must be online right now!
Perrieedwards: Well I entertain you lot all the time, it's only fair that I entertain myself with you guys sometimes! It's funny! I love tattoos so much! Please you have to show me! 😚
Jacubbear900: You amuse easily don't you lol! Since you asked so nicely, I might do, once its less red and stuff okay? ☺️ X
Perrieedwards: I'll hold you to that! Be warned, I'll be coming after you if you back out! You busy right now? Xxx
Jacubbear900: Wow! That would be terrible... Just kidding. No, not busy, why? ☺️ X
Perrieedwards: Oh good. Tell me about yourself. I wanna know things xxx
Jacubbear900: Really? What kind of things? X
Perrieedwards: Everything! I'm nosey! How about your real name to start with, although I think I can guess! 😅 And what do you do and stuff... When you're not on Instagram that is. That okay? Xx
Jacubbear900: Don't you have other fans to get to know? 😅 Go on then, guess my name... If you get it wrong, you don't get to see the tattoo! I'm studying English at uni and work part time in a music shop... That alright for now? Xx
I sat up a little on the bed, pushing my pillows up and sitting more comfortably. I grinned to myself, going back up and reading the previous messages, something I knew I'd be doing for probably another five years. Maybe later I could sit back and wonder if this is really happened.
My phone flashed again and another message came through.
Perrieedwards: Sorry, shall I go away? Haha, I've DM'ed one or two others but I'm intrigued by you... Jacob? I'm right, right? So I'll be waiting to see that tattoo! So that makes you 20 or 21 yeah? It also makes it past your bed time if you're in uni tomorrow! Naughty! Oooh a music shop, what kind? ☺️ Xxx
I stared at the message for a long time, not even trying to form a reply in my head. She was intrigued by me? What did that mean? Why was she intrigued by me as opposed to the other fans she had been interacting with since yesterday?
Jacubbear900: No, you're fine where you are 😅. You got it! Well, its spelt 'Jakob' but I'll let you off 😉 Yeah, I'm 21 so I don't have a bed time and I'm not tired yet. ☺️ Er, it does like hi-tech expensive gear, the kind you might use in studios, or if you're a DJ or like collecting old equipment, that kinda stuff x
Perrieedwards: Yay, hi Jakob! 😚 Oooh sounds cool! I might have to come in with the girls and have a look round sometime! Are you in uni early? I don't want to keep you up babe xx
Oh my god, she called me babe. I was about to reply when another message came through from her.
Perrieedwards: Rawr, I have to go. 😒 I'll be back on you about that tattoo soon though so don't you forget! And 🤫 but I think your my favourite follow so far. Sweet dreams Jakob xxxx
Numbly, with my eyes wide and my mouth slightly open, I typed back.
Jacubbear900: I won't forget, I promise. Awh, no way! Don't worry; you've always been my favourite follow! ☺️ Night Perrie xx
**
Just as I was getting in bed that night, Lauren rang me.
"Hi."
"You asleep yet Jake?"
"Yeah, I'm well away in dreamland Lauren, clearly." I laughed, rolling my eyes.
"Very funny! D'you want a lift tomorrow?"
"If you don't mind, that'd be good."
"Okay, no problem. So did she message you back?"
"Ah and there's the real reason she rang." I smirked.
"Yeah whatever, so come on, has she?"
"Yep." I said unable to contain myself. I jumped on the spot slightly and squealed once again. "In fact, we were messaging back and forth for ages just an hour or so ago."
"You're shitting me!" Lauren gasped. "Can I see tomorrow?!"
"No chance."
"Awh come on..."
"No way. They're mine." I laughed.
"I'll just steal your phone." Lauren said smugly. "I've done it loads in the past and you've never noticed."
"You're a fucker! Anyway there was never anything interesting on it then... And I already thought of that. There's a passkey on my phone now Lauren, so nice try."
"Well that's hardly gonna baffle me, the passkey is probably Perrie's birthday!" Lauren laughed loudly and I had to hold the phone away from my ear for a second.
"Yeah right, as if I'd be that obvious! Leave my phone alone Miss King."
"Spoil sport." Lauren said. "I'm only kidding honey."
"I know you are."
"I'll see you in the morning."
"Night."
"Night Jake."
I hung up and crawled into bed, switching the lamp off. Turning on my side still holding my phone, I checked my alarm was on, then quickly changed my passkey from Perrie's birthday to something else before setting it down and closing my eyes.