Spring 2011
After New Year's Eve, it had taken Max a solid week to realize that Zoey hadn't actually said no, though she hadn't said yes either. In fact, it had been just confusing enough for Max to spend months wondering if he should try again.
His classes had gotten hard, which meant putting off deciding to get a more specific answer out of Zoey got easier. He had less and less free time as the course material required more and more study.
Still no matter how busy he was, Max always seemed to find time to fret and overthink. If dating was too casual, would jumping into something more serious work better for her or did she not believe in the permanence of romantic attachments in general? Or was there something else going on that he was missing?
He had no better way of describing his current state of mind than the emotional equivalent of hanging his head against a wall.
The funniest consequence of all this was that Zoey had noticed something was wrong and was therefore trying to cheer him up, that way she did when she knew something was wrong but didn't think you wanted to talk about it.
But when she wasn't trying to cheer him Zoey was talking more and more about Simon. Simon was a new friend she'd made in one of her classes. Max tried to console himself that she was at least not dating him. Though this did make him feel more and more sure that if he didn't tell her for real soon, Mitch's prediction would come true.
Time passed, the snow melted and spring loomed on the horizon. Which meant the family was all waiting for that phone call telling them Emily had gone into labour.
"I feel too young to be an aunt," Zoey said and not for the first time.
"It isn't like your brother gave you a choice in the matter," Max reminded her. Zoey turned her head to give him a look that said 'don't be stupid.' Max couldn't help but laugh a little.
"You know what I mean," Zoey continued. "Like when did we become old?"
"We're nineteen," Max reminded her.
"Exactly!" Zoey said. "Only six short months and we will no longer be considered teenagers."
"Don't you have math to do?" Max replied, gesturing to the text books and notepads layed out in front of them on the table.
"Urg," Zoey groaned. "Don't remind me."
"But you like math," Max chuckled.
"I like code," Zoey countered. "It's like math but much better."
"Computer science majors involve a couple things that aren't directly computer related," Max informed her. "Just the way it is."
"Maybe that phone will ring and my nephew will get born and save me from this hell," Zoey said in mock horror.
"Or maybe you just need some coffee," Max offered.
"Fine," Zoey sighed. "We'll try it your way." And with that she got up to head to the cafeteria and get herself something. Max assumed that if she went for coffee she'd probably come back with at least a bagel as well. She usually did.
Max directed his attention back down to his notebook. Which formula was he using again? And to solve for the variable he had to do the sum of which values? Where were his notes. Ah yes the values were...
Ring. Ring. Ring.
His phone broke his concentration. Knowing he'd have to rethink the problem from scratch now anyway, Max reached to check the caller ID. His first reaction was puzzled. Maggie never called him. Surely, this meant Emily was having the baby. Curious, but not concerned, Max answered the call.
"Max?" Maggie's voice spoke into his ear and at once Max was tense. He'd never heard her speak with such anguish before in his life. The pain and sorrow she'd managed to pack into that one word was enough to make Max forget where he was. All his attention was now focused on Maggie's voice.
"I'm here," Max assumed her.
"Can Zoey see you?" Maggie asked. "Can she see your face?"
"No," Max replied. "She went to get coffee."
"I don't want her to hear this over the phone," Maggie continued. Max was pretty sure she was crying now. "I know I'm asking a lot of you but I want her to hear it from someone who loves her."
Max didn't have time to register the fact that Mitch had told his wife Max's secret before Maggie spoke again.
"Mitch had another heart attack," Maggie explained. "But it was faster than before. He didn't have time to even pick up his phone to get help." She paused. He didn't need her to finish; the sinking feeling in his stomach told him what she was going to say.
"He's dead, Max," Maggie cried. "Zoey's father died."
It was good that she'd said it outloud. The sinking feeling in his stomach had told Max what she was going to say, but he hadn't really believed it until she'd spoken the words.
"And you want me to tell her?" Max said, his voice breaking.
"I just don't want her to hear it over the phone," Maggie sniffered. "But if you can't that's okay, just tell her to come see me."
They had just started their homework and Max knew he'd never be able to come up with a good enough reason for Zoey to go all the way home especially when she had another class later that day. Even if he wanted the second option, he couldn't imagine how to pull it off.
"It's okay," Max replied. "I can do it." And he hung up the phone.
He at least had a few moments to compose himself before Zoey appeared holding a coffee in one hand and, just as he'd suspected, a bagel in the other.
"Decided it was also snack time," Zoey said as she placed her items on the table.
"Your mom called," Max began, not really sure if there was any not horrible way to share this news.
"Oh is Emily having the baby?" Zoey asked excitedly.
"She didn't mention Emily," Max said.
"Huh weird," Zoey replied, looking unconcerned.
"She called to pass on some information. She wanted me to tell you rather than hearing it over the phone," Max began. "Or from a stranger."
"Alright," Zoey said very slowly.
"Your dad," Max began. He didn't want to do this. He didn't want to speak the words that would cause her pain. "Well he had another heart attack, but it was faster than before and he wasn't able to get help."
Her bagel and coffee completely forgotten, Zoey stared at him. "What are you saying?" she demanded, volume in her voice now.
"He didn't make it," Max said, in a small voice.
"Why would you say that!" Zoey yelled, standing up and looking as though she were preparing for a fight.
"Because your mom-"
"Just because you wish my parents were your parents doesn't mean you can go around making stuff up!" Zoey was really yelling now.
"Hey now where did that come fro-"
"I didn't know you were this selfish!" Zoey screamed at him.
Max couldn't help but feel those words like the cut of a knife to his heart.
"Fine don't believe me," Max called back though not as loudly or with as much anger as her. "Go talk to your mother."
"Well I can't be here anymore can I?" Zoey shot back and just like that she was packing up her stuff and leaving.
Max wasn't sure how long he just sat there, staring at the empty chair across from him. They'd never yelled at each other like that before, ever. Not once in their whole lives. And it hurt. Fighting with Zoey was a pain Max had never experienced before and on top of that losing a man he'd looked up to like a father was yet another pain he'd never before known. Because Zoey wasn't wrong. Max loved her parents. They'd been like his second family all his life.
As Max sat there staring at the empty chair he let the grief have him, crying silently over his homework.
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This chapter is dedicated to my late father who died of a sudden heart attack five years ago.
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Sneak Peek Chapter 8
The funeral was planned for the coming Saturday and despite Zoey's current attitude towards him Maggie wanted Max to attend which he was grateful for. He needed to be there.
Time passed very strangely as Saturday approached. Speeding up and slowing down quite differently than normal. Working on school work suddenly became an activity that sped up the hours while his favorite video games seemed to drag. The best moments though were when his mind went blank and he could be completely still, though those didn't last nearly long enough.
Saturday arrived and Max put on black pants with a black button up shirt before getting into the car with his parents. The funeral was being held at Mitch's favourite restaurant. Max assumed Maggie had had to organize all of this and wished again that she'd let him help. Though he supposed maybe Zoey had helped her or Andrew. Emily was still very much pregnant, though now about five days past her due date.