The plan was Zayn and Liam were going to come up for part of the first week, but spend the second week with their families. My mom and Harry's mom were going to spend a few, scattered and sort of randomly chosen, nights at the Air B&B, and my sisters were going to come up the second and third day. Other than that, it was just going to be Harry and I spending a whole 2 weeks doing whatever we wanted whenever we wanted. I was beyond excited.
After we had settled on a plan and called everyone to set it up, I went in my mom's car as Harry went with his mom in their car, and we began our journey up to Carlisle.
- - -
"You like him don't you? Harry."
My bones shivered. That came out of absolutely nowhere.
"What? I mean yeah he's chill. He's fun to be around." I say practically stuttering.
"Boobear, you can't hide things like that from me. No matter how hard you try to cover it up, I'll always be able to read you like a book."
But she was mistaken. I didn't like Harry like that. I'm straight. I like girls. I don't think about Harry like that because I mean to, I just accidentally do sometimes because I have hormones and things like that happen when your a young lad.
"I don't like Harry like that mom, I'm straight." I say confidently.
"Okay. But if things change..."
"Things won't change. What do you even mean?" How could she be assuming things like that about me. She hasn't seen me in months and in the first few minutes of us being alone together, she has the accusation of me being homosexual. That's a big thing to just assume about a person. Life changing.
"I'm just saying what I'm saying because I saw the way you hugged each other. I think your 'non-existent' feelings are mutual." She says looking at me from the corner of her eye while still facing forward. My heart lit up. And just as fast as it lit up, it burned right out. I need to stop. Damn hormones.
- - -
We arrived at the house a few minutes before Harry and his mom had so I had the opportunity to pick which room I wanted to be mine. Since Harry and I were the only ones constantly staying there, we got to pick which two rooms we wanted, while the other two rooms were used as guest rooms for whomever was staying that night. There was also a pullout couch and an air mattress in case we had a few too many people one night. I picked the room immediately to the left as you walk up the stairs. It had blue walls and high ceilings. The house was beautiful. Styled like a cabin, it was mainly brown with wooden planks as decor and wallpaper. It had adorable plastic bears placed randomly around that gave the house a warm feeling to it. The wall that looked out onto the lake was mainly windows so that you could sit on the leather couches and stare out onto the lake and everyone boating around. It gave way to any light wanting to come in so we would rarely have to use the light switches during the day. My room had a queen size mattress with a large wooden head board and foot board. Very masculine. It had a wooden dresser that matched the outline of the bed, and an off white carpet filling the room. There were a few paintings on the walls, one of a waterfall, another of a family of bears, lots of bears in this house I realized.
Once I had picked my room and marked my territory by putting my suitcase on the bed, I ventured out to see the rest of the house. I wandered into the room directly opposite of mine. Pretty much the same layout as mine. Queen size bed, this time with a white head and foot board, same exact dresser, and a few paintings sprawled out on the walls. The view from this room was the lake whereas mine was the woods that surrounded the road leading up to the house. Pretty room. Less masculine.
Then I went into the next room directly adjacent to the one I had just been in. It was a bathroom and had a shower, toilet, sink, and washer/dryer. One of the three bathrooms in the house. The color sequence was grey on white with a hint of blue on the towels and curtains.
There was a sitting area upstairs, but other than the two bedrooms and the bathroom, there was nothing else to look at, so I went downstairs. The room I looked at first was another bedroom. A bunk bed with red sheets was first in view. Then as you walk in you see the two dressers and a vanity in the corner. This room was primarily off-white and red. I was assuming Zayn and Liam would stay here, or my sisters when they came.
After that room was the last bedroom. A blue theme to it again. Blue curtains and a blue carpet. It had a king sized bed, a vanity, and an ottoman at the end of the bed. I was assuming the moms would stay here together. Harry's mom and my mom were extremely close. Practically sisters so sharing a room and a bed wouldn't be a problem for them I could guess.
After I had walked around and looked at the kitchen, dining room, porch, and the other two bathrooms, Harry and his mom arrived. As they wandered in, I explained to my mom and Anne that I could assume they were going to take this room, pointing in the blue themed room, and they looked in and agreed almost instantly. As they were talking about their plans as they unloaded some of their things, I noticed Harry wandering upstairs, probably looking for his room.
He wandered into mine as I followed him up the stairs, turned to me and said "I see you've already picked your room." He grins. I smile.
"Yup, so you've got to pick one."
He wanders out and into the room opposite of mine with the same layout.
"This one's almost identical. I'll take it." He says throwing his suitcase on the wooden bench by the windowsill.
"What do you want to do right now? Your sisters are coming tomorrow and for the rest of the day, we have nothing scheduled." I say.
"Let's go on a walk. Just explore what's around here." He says as he bounces off the bed where he had been sitting.
We run downstairs and yell to our moms that we're heading out. He opens the door for me and as I walk out I jokingly bow to him and say "Thank you sir." He chuckles and follows me out. As we're walking, silence slowly creeps up on us. Harry and I never really have a problem with making conversation, it's always just come easily for us, but tonight's been different. To break the silence I yell, "Race you to the end of the road!" and take off. I hear Harry yell behind me "You could've given me a warning or something!" I ignore him and sprint as fast as I can. I see Harry gaining on me from the corner of my eye, but there's no way he's beating me. I sprint faster and gain more distance between the two of us. About 150 feet left until the road intersects another street and we get to stop our running. I feel my heart race as my adrenaline kicks in. I make it to the end of the street and stop, breathing heavily and panting. Harry was just a few feet behind me so when we stop he almost runs into me. I catch my breath quickly but I notice it's not as easy for Harry to do. He puts his hand to his chest and his other hand on my shoulder to gain balance as he breathes loudly. He pants and gives me a face of pain. Oh god I forgot Harry has bad asthma.
"C'mon Harry, just breath." I say putting my arm on his shoulder. He doesn't have his inhaler so we just have to wait for him to catch his breath.
"I'm sorry I forgot you have asthma."
He gives me a face of pain mixed with "how did you forget". I instantly feel a wave of guilt. God Harry's in so much pain and it's my fault. I put my other hand on Harry's shoulder as he winces with every breath.
"In and out. In and out." I say breathing along with him. "You've got this. Just keep breathing."
He can't even get any words out. This attack is one of the worst ones I've witnessed. And it's my fault.
His eyes start to get watery as he flinches from the pain. Luckily, I can see that he's starting to catch his breath. Each breath is starting to look a little bit easier for him. As he finally is able to breathe with a more usual pattern, he wraps his arms around me and tucks his head into my neck.
"You're mean." He pouts.
I sigh as my worry slips away.
"I'm sorry Harry." I whisper into his ear as I hug him back.
We hug for a good 10 seconds before either of us releases. After that we continue walking, taking a left onto the road we had just ran to.
We're walking pretty close to each other, close enough that every time my arms swings out a little bit, it brushes against Harry's arm, each time giving me a mini heart attack.
We walk for a good 20 minutes. Somewhat in silence but we also talked about a few things, like what we wanted to do while we were up here, how fame has affected us. We reminisced about our X-Factor days just 2 short years ago and how life has changed. We talked about our families and about the boys. Harry and I are always on the same page and it's really refreshing being able to talk to someone who thinks so similarly to yourself. I love talking with Harry.
The sun begins to set around 40 minutes into our walk. We've been walking on the edge of the lake for the past 20 minutes, so we decide to find a bench and sit to watch the sunset and the stars form above us. We sit and just take in the world around us.
"It's so beautiful here." I hear Harry say.
"Yeah it really is."
"It makes you really think about how small we actually are." I turn to look at him as he speaks. "I mean, we're looking at this sunset, but so are probably millions of other people, yet we know none of them." I smile.
"I didn't know you thought about those kinds of things."
"Of course I do, do you not?" He asks, almost offended.
"Obviously I do. But I thought I was the only one, well with the band being so busy we don't get much time to just sit and think."
"Oh, well I think about it all the time. It keeps me up at night sometimes." He laughs.
"I like that you think about that. It's cute." As the words come out of my mouth, I realize how weird they are. He turns and looks at me, but instead of looking creeped out, he grins and looks down at my shoulder. Then he lowers his head and rests it on my shoulder. In response, I lower my head on top of his. Both of us staring out onto the lake that's reflecting the all powerful sunset. I could stay right here forever if I could.
About 15 minutes go by, of us just sitting in silence. But not the awkward kind of silence, the good kind. The mutually shared respect of the place we're both in. We both understand that we are just tiny little things living a short part of this big world, so we feel no need to share any words at the moment. But the sky is getting darker and I know that if we stay out any longer, it will become pitch black, which wouldn't have been a problem if we had brought flashlights, but we hadn't.
I look down at Harry resting on my shoulder and whisper "Harry, we need to head back." No response. "Harry?" Nothing. I listen to his slight sounds of breathing. He's fallen asleep.
My face almost cracks from me smiling so hard. I wish I didn't have to wake him up. I wish he could just stay on my shoulder forever and that we could just spend the night here. Unfortunately, there are too many reasons why we can't do those things.
I put my hand on his shoulder and shake gently for a few seconds. He mumbles, letting me know he's awake, but not happy about it.
"Harry, we need to get back. It's really dark out."
"But I'm comfortable, you're shoulder's comfy, and I don't want to move." He mumbles angrily.
"If it gets any darker, we won't be able to get home, we'll get lost." I say into his ear.
"Well then we get lost, who cares as long as we've got each other, we'll be fine."
My heart races with affection at that moment. It takes all my power to not show my smile.
"If we stay any longer, the bears will eat us."
"Let them eat us, see how I care." He mumbles.
"C'mon Harry..."
"That's not my name." He interrupts.
"What?" I asked confused.
"That's not my name, anymore. Call me Hazza."
The biggest smile erupts onto my face. I feel both of my cheeks lift up beyond the point they have ever been before. My heart races with happiness as I feel a rush go through my bones. He wants me to call him Hazza.
"C'mon...Hazza..."I say, and he smiles, "Let's go." I lift his head off of my shoulder, as upset as it makes me, stand up, and reach my hands out for his to help him up. I lift him onto his feet and wrap his arm around my shoulder and my arm around his waist, like I'm helping a poor lad who's limping. I carry him like that practically all the way home.
Once we got inside, the house was dark. Our moms had already gone to sleep. We walk upstairs, too tired to unpack or get dressed into pajamas or brush our teeth. We just had one thing in mind, to go to sleep. I bring Harry into his room and lower him on his bed. I take off his shoes as he mumbles something inaudible. I tuck him under the covers and as I'm about to leave, he grabs me and hugs me.
"Thanks Lou, I love you."
"I love you too." But this time I meant it more than a brother/best friend love. I don't know how he meant it, but all I know is that maybe my mom was right. I think I love the curly lad.
-----------------------------------
A/N
Are any of you guys seeing Louis or Harry in concert?
I'm seeing both next year and I'm PUMPEDDD