Chapter One Hundred And Twenty: Seeing Him Again
"Do you think she's alright?"
"I don't know, she's barely come out of her room since she came home."
"Do you think she's awake?"
"I can't hear anything, I might go check on-"
The bedroom door to Lina's door flung open. Lina was standing in her doorway, her hair a mess, her pyjamas crinkled and a scowl upon her face. "You two really need to learn how to whisper," she said to Remus and Sirius.
"You weren't asleep were you?" Sirius asked hoping he hadn't just woken his daughter up from much-needed sleep.
"No," Lina said, she gently pushed passed her two father figures and headed into the kitchen, she sat down at the table and was softly joined by the adults.
"How are you feeling today?" Remus asked.
Lina suppressed a groan, the two men had asked her that question more times a day than she could count but Lina always answered the same. "I'm fine" Remus placed a mug of hot chocolate in front of Lina "Dumbledore coming around today?"
"Not today," Sirius said.
"Are you going to visit Cedric today?" Remus asked.
Lina froze, every day since school ended a week and a half ago Lina had told herself she would go and visit him but then she'd never would. Danny and Lucy had agreed to go yesterday, they had invited Lina who had said yes figuring it would be easier to go with her friends than alone. As morning came and Lina got ready she found she couldn't and had a panic attack. "No, but Danny and Lucy said they might come over, tell me how Cedric is. Is that alright-" she flickered her eyes between Sirius and Remus, Lima was still getting used to having her dad around full time "I don't know which one to ask, sorry."
"Both" they answered.
Lina placed her head in her hands "it's like having two dads."
Remus and Sirius chuckled "and to answer your questions, yes they can come over" Remus answered.
"Do they know the truth?" Sirius asked.
"Yeah," Lina said. She got up from the kitchen and placed her half-drunk mug of hot chocolate in the sink, she then left for her room.
***
Lina was left alone for several hours, which she was grateful for. The silence in her room was neither comforting nor suffocating, Lina fond it harder to be around people, to listen to them talk like everything was normal. Nothing was normal.
Lina was curled up in her bed when a soft knock sounded on her door "come in" Lina said and pushed herself up on the bed.
It was Lucy and Danny. Lucy came and sat next to Lina on the bed and Danny sat at Lina's desk. "So we met your dad," Danny said.
"That was fucking terrifying," Lucy said.
"He's really a big softy," Lina said. There was an awkward silence, there was an elephant in the room. "How is he?"
"There's been no change," Lucy said carefully choosing her words, she didn't want to upset Lina more than already was "but that's better than him getting worse.."
"You need to go and see him, Lina," Danny said firmly. Lucy sent him a look but Danny ignored it, Lina needed tough love "his condition isn't changing, how long do you think he can hold on for. You need to go and see him before he died and you regret it for the rest of your life."
***
Lina pondered on Danny's words all night, she didn't sleep and by the time the sun was starting to peek through Lina was dressed and ready to leave the cottage.
It was honestly a spur of the moment decision to go see Cedric. At around four in the morning, she rolled over in her bed unable to sleep and saw Egg sound asleep she wasn't sure what it was about seeing Egg asleep but whatever it was Lina immediately jumped up from her bed and got dressed. She wrote a note to Remus and Sirius and waited for the sun to rise. Once it had she threw Floo Powder into the fireplace and watched the flames grow emerald green.
"You can do this" Lina said to herself.
Lina stepped into the fireplace and with one more deep breathe she was ready. "St Mungo's" with that she was gone.
St Mungo's hospital was quiet in the early morning. Lina approached the front desk and hoped she didn't look out of place. She had made sure her eyes were tear-stained free and that her hair was brushed.
"How can I help you, dear?" The witch at the front desk asked Lina. The witch was older, she looked tired. Lina wondered how long she had been working for, but still, she smiled kindly at Lina.
"I'm here to visit a patient," Lina said "Cedric Diggory."
"I'm sorry dear but visiting hours don't start for another couple of hours. You'll have to come back."
No there was no way she could do that if Lina left she was scared she wouldn't have the courage to come back. "Please" she begged "I really need to see him. Please."
"I'm sorry, there's nothing I can do," she said, the smiled had dropped from her face.
"I-"
"It's alright," another voice said, Lina looked away from the desk. Walking over was another witch, dressed in a healers uniform. She was blonde and looked only to be in her twenties and by the way she walked over to Lina and the way she held herself showed she held authority. "It's alright Maggie," she said to Maggie "we can break the rules once in a while" she placed a hand on Lina's arms and led her away from the reception area and to the staircase.
"Thank you," Lina said.
"It's alright, Maggie is such a stick for rules, and like I said sometimes you have to break them especially if it's as harmless as visiting someone a couple of hours before you're allowed," the witch Lina hadn't gotten the name of said and her and Lina began the walk up the stairs "I'm Sam by the way."
"Lina. Er, Sam won't you get in trouble for this? I don't want you to, it's not-"
"I'm in charge of looking after Mr Cedric Diggory" she informed Lina, Lina nodded "you'll be alone in there too, I made his parents go home. Of course, I understand why they don't want to leave their son, but I'm a healer my duty is to make sure people are alright and they weren't alright watching him all day with nothing changing. They'll be back later today though I'm sure."
"So there really has been no change?" Lina asked a small part of her was hoping Lucy and Danny were lying just to make Lina go and see him.
"I'm sorry but no" Sam said. They had now left the staircase and were walking down a corridor, they were closer to Cedric. "You never said what relation you have to Mr Diggory, are you one his friends?"
"Best friends" Lina immediately said, actually were they best friends anymore, in a sense, yes but they were something much more than that or at least leading that way.
"He meant a lot to you" Sam guessed.
Lina nodded, in her head, she corrected Sam's use of past tense.
"Well then I gotta warm you, it might be a lot seeing him like this" they stopped outside a closed door with a window towards the top. "I'll stay out here in case you want to talk after."
"Thanks."
"Oh and Lina, talk to him he might be able to hear you."
Lina nodded and went into the room. The room was completely quiet, Cedric was lying on his bed. The bed was in the middle of the room, there was a vase of flowers on the bedside table next to him and two chairs were beside the bed.
Lina took the seat closet to Cedric's face. Cedric looked asleep which put Lina at ease slightly.
"Hey, Ced," Lina said, "I'm sorry I haven't come sooner, I've been too scared to see you like this but now that I have it isn't as bad as I thought it would be, you look like you're sleeping and I can handle that."
Something caught Lina's eye in the sunlight. Lina moved Cedric's shirt to the side with delicate hands and saw Lina's necklace resting on Cedric's chest.
"You're still wearing it," she said, she leaned over and picked up the necklace but it was cracked, Lina frowned and turned the necklace over. The crack went right down the middle of the necklace, through the inscription on the back. Lina was sure with one good snap it would fully break. "What happened there?" She asked herself, she wasn't mad about her broken necklace more curious.
Lina dropped the necklace and settled back into her seat. "My dads living us now," she said "I still haven't really talked to him about how I'm feeling there's been joe time, even now when he's living with me I haven't spoken to him. I'm scared what he'll say, how he'll take it but Merlin it's strange living with him, between him and Remus it's like having two dads. What else? Oh! People came around nearly every day, on business. I won't say too much while you're asleep it's something you need to hear when you wake up which you will Cedric I know you will. Dumbledore been's round, Snape too which we all look forward to" she said sarcastically "Dora, been's around a lot both in business and because she's worried about me but I'm fine, be better if you were awake but...Dora's also been spending a lot of time with uncle Remus. I'm glad their friends."
Lina wasn't sure what else to say to Cedric, in the last week she hadn't done anything important. She had been stuck in a state of grief.
"I really need you to wake up Ced," Lina said "sooner rather than later, it's hard without you. I heard this phrase, you don't release what you have until it's gone but you can't go, not yet, not until we're old with grey hair, married with kids and grandkids then we go together. So wake up so that can happen, please" Lina stood up, her emotions were starting to overwhelm her. She was ready to leave but first, she placed a loving kiss to Cedric's forehead "come back to me, I love you" she whispered and left the hospital room completely unaware that Cedric's heartbeat was frowning increasingly stronger.
Sam was waiting for Lina like she said she would, she straightened up when she saw Lina and the door clicked shut behind her. "Are you alright?" Sam asked.
"I don't know," Lina said.
"Come on, let's talk about this over a cup of tea," same said. Sam took Lina back up the stairs and into the cafe on the top floor.
The cafe was mostly empty except for a couple of exhausted healers. Lina took a seat and waited until Sam came back with two cups of tea. They drank in silence and when Lina's cup was halfway drunk Sam spoke.
"It can be hard seeing someone you love look so lifeless for the first time," Sam said, "I've seen people in worse shape than Mr Diggory and make it through."
"He looked like he was sleeping, he looked peaceful. I didn't mind seeing him like that" Lina said, "am I awful for saying that?"
"No. I understand what you mean, it better seeing him looking like he's sleeping rather than bloody and bruised, his body bent in ways it shouldn't. At least with the way he's looking he still looks like him."
"Exactly. He had my necklace on, I gave it to him before the third task so he had me with him, I'm still with him now" Lina said looking at her teacup.
"You really love him don't you?" Sam asked.
Lina looked up from her cup "I know I'm only seventeen but I know he's the only one I want, he's my soulmate" Lina shrugged. It was the first time Lina had said how she thought about Cedric out loud, it made her feel warm inside and also sick at the same time.
"You're lucky," Sam said "I'm twenty-nine and still haven't found the one. Then again I'm always so bust at work I never have time to date."
"How long have you worked here?" Lina asked she didn't mind the conversation taking a turn.
"Nine years," she said and picked at her nails "after I left school I travelled with my Muggle cousin, I wanted to have a Muggle experience before starting work."
"What house were you in at school?"
"Ravenclaw, you?"
"Hufflepuff."
Sam smiled fondly and nodded her head "I once dated a girl from Hufflepuff. I really, really liked her."
"Why'd you break up then?" Lina curiously asked hoping Sam wouldn't mind "sorry, I shouldn't have asked, it's none of my business-"
"It's alright Lina and honestly I don't know, we dated for two years and then when we left school we drifted. Maybe not being around her every day was too much."
"Right person wrong time?" Lina guessed.
"Yeah."
"As I said I know I'm only seventeen and your twenty-nine but can I give you some advice?" Lina asked.
"Sure," Sam said waving her hand and ran a hand through her short blonde hair.
"Find her," Lina said "I waited far too long to tell Cedric how I felt and he might die and I only got to tell him I loved him twice. Life is way too short and unpredictable to hold feelings back. I took a risk telling Cedric how I felt knowing he might not feel the same way. Find your girl and tell her, she might even be wanting to find you but is too scared."
Sam was left speechless, she drank her tea and processed Lina's words. She drank her tea again "Are you sure your seventeen?"
"My friends say I give good advice," Lina said shyly.
"You do" Sam confirmed, "what's about you?"
"What about me?" Lina asked confused.
"Well, apart from Me Diggory what are your plans for after school?"
Lina looked around the hospital cafe, the healers looked exhausted and tired but rewarded too. Lina knew she wanted this, she wanted to help people "I want to be a healer, to help people. At school, I help Madame Pomfrey in the hospital wing already but the worse we typically get are broken noses from fights."
Sam pulled out her wand and waved it, a piece of paper appeared in between them, she slid it over to Lina "an application form, I'd like having you work here, so fill it out, get a reference from Madam Pomfrey, Professor Sprout and if you can Professor McGonagall. I'll vouch for you too and bring it back."
Lina was lost for words, she had only met Sam an hour ago and she was doing this for Lina. "Thank you, Sam."
Sam checked the small lock attached to her uniform "I have to get back to work, are you going to be alright?"
Lina looked up from reading the application form "I'll be fine" this time she was starting to believe herself.
***
Lina took the fireplace back to the cottage, it was strangely quiet as she stepped out brushing some cool marks off her jacket.
"Hello" Lina called out "anyone here?" She asked.
Sirius came into the kitchen, he crossed his arms "she's not dead Moony" Sirius said.
Lina rolled her eyes "I left a note."
"Oh yes, and what did it say again?" Sirius asked rhetorically "don't worry, I'm fine, I have to do something, will be back later. Don't see why we would worry with that detailed note you left."
"I was in a rush," Lina said, she sat down at the kitchen table and Remus soon joined the father and daughter in the kitchen.
"Lina you can't just run off without telling us where you're going," Remus said.
"I know, I'm sorry."
"So where did you go?" Sirius asked.
"I went to see Cedric."
Silence. Remus looked at Sirius, and they both sat down opposite Lina. "Oh."
"Yeah," Lima said "he's still not awake, so there's not much to say" Lina didn't want to talk either. She got up from the table "I'll be in my room if you need me."
"Lina" Remus said he reached out and grabbed her arm gently "please stop running from us, we're here if you want to talk, we'll listen."
"I know," Lina said and left going to hide away in her room.