Chapter 1
Fans shouting my name, chanting while I'm singing can give me energy, I'm tired, so tired that a minute now I'll faint but I need to be energetic in front of so many people, in front of my fans because I don't like them being disappointed because I don't have energy while performing my songs.
They paid thousands to watch me perform and I can't afford to watch my fans disappointed reactions.
Even me, I'm so disappointed in myself because I can't perform well.
"Aella! Aella! Aella! Woah!" Listening to their voices can boost my self-confidence.
I smiled while sitting down in front of my black piano. In front of me is a violet sparkling mic and the spotlight is now on me.
I hold the mic. "Hi guys, this is the last song that I will perform for you. This song is called erase you and I want to share this with people that are broken." I suddenly laughed at my statement.
"Woah! My friend is broken, that song was so good."
"It's perfect for your voice, I love that song of yours."
I really can't hear them well because 98% of my fans here in the stadium are shouting.
"Are you broken?"
My fans are shouting no and yes at the same time.
"Let's start. I hope you like this. I also dedicated this song to my heart." I chuckled shyly.
I started playing my piano.
🎤You were laughing when I met you
And you still do
Remember when I was the apple of your eye?
The center of your attention
Is still the best place I've ever been to
But nothing ever stays the same🎤
I open my eyes and scan the blue light crowd. I can't even see people looking at me because I'm blinded by the light in front of me. I only heard voices, singing with me.
🎤Someday I might
Cross the street when we're on the same side
Just to skip the "How are you?" "I'm fine"
But I'll love you all my life
And this heart will not erase you
This heart will not erase you🎤
My fans are very good at this song. I smiled while singing and continued playing my piano.
🎤I know someday you'll buy a little diamond ring
But it won't be for my finger
And I know someday your child will hear you sing
But I won't be there🎤
I really hate the lyrics of this song because it reminds me of 'him'. The fact that I wrote this one because of 'him'. He inspired me to write this one, a beautiful broken song.
🎤Someday I might
Cross the street when we're on the same side
Just to skip the "How are you?" "I'm fine"
But I'll love you all my life
And this heart will not erase you
This heart will not erase you🎤
I stop singing. I focused myself to the loud crowd. My fans are singing it for me and it wonderful they are very sick and it helps me to gain energy.
🎤And I see the life you can't
The life we could have lived
Holding hands in rocking chairs
Old and gray, I'd love you still🎤
Minsan napapaisip ako kung kamusta na siya? Crush—more on mahal ko pa yun, siguro hanggang ngayon. I don't know. I had loved him.
🎤Someday I might
Cross the street when we're on the same side
Just to skip the "How are you?" "I'm fine"
But I'll love you all my life
And this heart will not erase you
This heart will not erase you🎤
I don't have any news about him and it's been five years? I think. I lost count, I'm too busy. I don't have time to count the days, months, and years. Baka lalo ko lang siyang mahalin.
🎤This heart will not erase you
My heart cannot erase you🎤
Tumayo ako sa upuan at nag lakad papunta sa gitna. I clapped my hands and shouted 'Yeah, You all are amazing.' through the mic.
"Ahm."I cleared my throat because it's a little salty."Guys! I think this is goodbye. Thank you so much for being here with me, for singing here with me. I love you all so much. Thank you, I will be back!"I smiled as I waved my hands a hundred times. I'm happy but sad at the same time because I'm done performing but everything has an end game.
You will start with an S and End with an E. It doesn't make sense, right? Like my love for him it doesn't make sense anymore. Anyway, the stage gets lowered and I can't see my fans now.
Inalalayan ako ng isang staff ko papunta sa dress room ko. It's tiring but fun.
"You did great, Aella."My manager greeted me with a big smile, as always. She's like that.
I look at her with tired eyes."My throat is now killing me."I whispered softly. My throat hurts so bad now.
She nodded."Take your med now, drink a lot of water, you have a concert tomorrow in L.A."
Every time I swallowed my saliva my throat will get hurt a lot. I don't know if I can perform tomorrow on well-condition. But for my fans, I will perform, I will perform for them.
My throat will get better tomorrow, I think.
Nandito na ako sa sasakyan ko nasa front seat ang manager ko habang ako ay nandito sa likuran.
I lean at the headboard and started closing my eyes. My clothes are changed now into decent.
Kanina I'm wearing a long ocean blue dress with a thousand small diamonds on it and a long slit. Now, I'm wearing white jeans, and black racer back and an oversized military jacket paired with booths.
"Villa, what's my schedule after tomorrow?"I asked softly while my eyes are still closed.
"After tomorrow...you have a photoshoot with Fabulous at 8:30 in the morning and after that you're free."
Hindi ako sumagot. Huminga ako ng malalim. Fabulous is a famous clothing brand. I really love their clothes it's comfortable and affordable. I remember the lowest price for their clothes was 6 thousand a year ago but now, I don't know.
Hindi rin nag Tagal ay nakararing na kami sa Bahay. Looking at my house, paparazzi are everywhere. Minsan natatakot na ako sa kanila kasi bigla nalang Silang magpapakita.
"Oh no."I heard my manager.
I only rolled my eyes. Immune na immune na ako sa kanila. Wala na ba Talaga akong privacy?
"Get rid of them, now!"I heard my manager talking to someone. It's the security guard.
Bakit ba nakapasok ang mga Yan dito sa Village? Hindi na secured and Village na ito.
A minute later ay may mga bodyguard na pwersahang hinahatak ang ilang mga paparazzi. Ano na naman ang ilalabas nila sa news paper? Articles?
Unbelievable. Spreading false rumors about me was really not a good thing to do.
My place is now peaceful, wala na ang mga paparazzi kaya lumabas ako ng sasakyan at nag punta agad sa bahay ko.
Nakapasok ako matapos kong e slide ang card ko. Iniwan narin ako ng manager ko matapos niya akong kausapin saglit.
It's 12 midnight and I'm so tired as hell. I take my medicine and go to bed.
Hindi ko namalayang nakatulog na pala ako. Maaga akong nagising dahil sa maaga pa ang flight namin papunta sa L.A.
I hate touring.
"Is your voice getting better?"My manager Villa asked and I nodded.
It gets better but not fully better. Mabilis ang byahe mga hapon na kami nakarating sa hotel na tutuluyan at wala ng pahinga-hinga dahil agad kaming nag punta sa stadium para sa rehearsal.
Hindi ko na namalayan ang oras. Natapos ang lahat lahat alas 10 na ng gabi. Kasama ko ang manager ko. Nandito kami sa isang restaurant katabi lang ng hotel ko dahil nagugutom na talaga ako.
Hindi ko alam kong may paparazzi ba dito dahil mukhang wala naman pero may isa akong kanina pa napapansin. Hindi kalayuan ang upuan niya sa amin pero tingin ng tingin siya dito habang tinataas ang camera niya.
His too obvious.
"Next time you need to be careful to your voice."Paalala na naman niya.
"Hmm,"I mumbled while eating my chicken pasta. I'm not a diet person.
"I'm serious, Aella."
"Yeah."I know and I'm tired of that. Paulit-ulit nalang.
Kumain nalang siya. Hindi na ako kinakausap.
May nahagid akong isang lalaking palapit sa upuan namin. Nakayuko siya dahil may tinitignan siya sa phone niya and I'm sure that's him.
It's fucking him. What the actual fuck. He's so handsome as ever.
"Hey, chew that pasta, Aella."
tumingin ako sa manager ko. I smiled at her and raised my brows. She looked at me weird.
I looked at the man who's looking at me now with a proud look. He smirked at me sexily while walking towards me. I feel nervous at the moment.
My heart wants to get out of my body. I hate this, I know I haven't moved on yet, I don't want to erase him but I don't want to be 'marupok' when I'm with him.
I transferred my look to Villa my Manager and I whispered to her furiously.
"It's Keane."
-VioletN.-
Sorry for my grammar. I'm not fluent yah know. Dito na naman tayo mag hahasik ng kabaliwan. Kakatapos ko lang sa Fearless. If you haven't read it yet, okay lang naman. Sisimulan ko na to, Sana suportahan nyu parin ako. Thank you.
Catrien- Erase you