Chapter II
No matter how much I hated it, I ended up coming anyways... this is so unfair...
It was quite a chilly night; you were standing out there and your body was completely vulnerable to the cool breeze that blew against the exposed skin of your arms and shoulders, causing goose pimples to appear. You were standing in front of the "Alfombra Roja" Jazz bar, watching the people - mostly couples - going in and out of the pub, while some were simply walking along the dimly lit street to their different destinations. They all, males and females were dressed in vogue; men were wearing fancy dark suits and excessively polished dress shoes, and along with each one of them was a woman - or two - clinging to his arm, looking ostentatious in every way possible, clothed in chic dress which was immodestly showing some skin, and adorned in all sorts of dazzling jewelry.
You lowered your head and gazed at your own garments, and your eyes sank into a slight feeling of disappointment as they examined the obvious difference between the swanky styles of the mentioned ladies and your modest appearance. You were clad in a simple - yet cute - black Taffeta knee-length Cocktail dress with black flowers attached to the bottom part of the skirt, and your hair was pulled into an elegant braided bun while basic make-up was applied to your face. However, even the smallest and simplest change in your style had a drastic effect on your overall looks. In fact, you didn't even try to prettify yourself or to beat other women in a beauty contest, for you weren't interested in the slightest in the artificial and short-lived glamor that people usually try to dignify. It wasn't wrong, in your opinion, to beautify oneself; however, and despite of sometimes wishing you could be as carefree as those women were, you were satisfied with the way you were. You had one thing which was far greater and more precious than anything else in the world, something more beautiful than beauty itself.
You looked at your right side where stood the tall herculean Angeal, his black hair brushed neatly to the back of his head, wearing his usual serious frown over his face, then you looked to your left to gaze at your other male friend, Genesis, who didn't surpass the first one had it come to height or presence, but he had his own overwhelming charm thanks to his elegant looks and his silky red hair that was flowing harmonically with the soft breeze of that night. You then closed your eyes and allowed a graceful smile to brush your lips. I have a treasure which cannot be replaced. True friends. People who care for me and protect me... I couldn't ask for more. With these two by my side, I've got nothing to fear, nothing to worry about. Zack, as well... he'd do anything in order to make me smile. And... of course... Sephiroth...
Sephiroth...
Your brow furrowed dolefully upon having the said man's face flashing in your mind. The conversation that the two of you had the previous day did not end up well, and both came out unhappy. It wasn't supposed to be that way; how did things turn out so awfully? But again, he was behaving strangely, forcefully, and domineeringly. He believed he could get whatever and whomever he wanted, and he had the power to do so. You didn't like that however: you loved him, really, but you didn't want it to be this way.
Your spirit was weighed with your troubling thoughts, and your body began shivering uncontrollably not only because of the night chill but also of bewilderment added. You hugged yourself with your arms in attempt to keep control of those overwhelming emotions that had driven both your mind and body insane, when you heard Angeal addressing you, asking: "_______... are you cold?"
"Ah, no... I'm fine. Thank you for your concern." You smiled weakly at him.
"I can lend you my suit blazer if you want." He suggested.
"Well, well, mister Hewley!" You whipped your head to the left upon hearing Genesis' interjection: "You're acting all courteous and chivalrous, like a true gentleman... are you, by any chance, trying to hit on her?" Genesis said while arching an eyebrow.
You were actually taken aback by his words at first, but you couldn't help the eased giggle. He was trying - intentionally - to cheer you up. He somehow had noticed your uneasiness, so he threw that little joke that was enough to drive Angeal impatient: "What?! Why would I...?! How...?! How dare you, Genesis! I was simply asking if..."
"Hey, hey... calm down. I was simply joking, okay?" Genesis replied with a relaxed chuckle.
"That wasn't the right time for your silly jokes, Genesis! I'm already pissed off! We've been waiting out here for God knows how long, and Mr. Kitty-eyes and that little Puppy still haven't arrived yet!" Angeal spat out, crossing his muscly arms in front of his chest.
"They'll be here." You uttered calmly.
"I wonder what is taking them so long." Genesis sighed with boredom. "Even women, with all their complicated preparations, could have done it on time... uhh..." he turned his head sideways to look at you. "No offense, though."
"No worries." You answered with a smile.
"I'll show that Puppy a lesson he won't forget... once he gets here." Angeal added angrily.
"I guess you could show him now." Said Genesis, gesturing with his head to the two of you to look somewhere in the background. You turned and found both Sephiroth and Zack heading to your direction. "Hey guys! Sorry, we're late!" shouted Zack, outrunning Sephiroth and hurling toward you.
"You think?!" Angeal yelled at Zack, banging him square on the head.
"Ouch! It wasn't my fault! We ran into traffic, that's all!" The younger guy whinged.
"Well, don't do this again... it's wrong to keep your seniors waiting."
"I'm sorry, okay?! Dude, you're being too-..." Zack suddenly brought his whining to a halt as soon as his eyes met the sight of you. He straightened, gazing studiously with eyes clearly stunned and jaw dropped in surprise. "_______?"
"Good evening." You greeted.
"This is you alright!" He exclaimed. "Oh . My . Gosh! I can't believe it! You look so awesome! Eh... beautiful, I mean!"
"Thank you." You replied appreciatively.
"Evening." Sephiroth mumbled, finally joining the group. He seemed too lazy for his nature that evening, that he could barely raise a greeting. He was looking in the direction of the bar from which lively music was emanating, not making direct eye-contacts with any of you. A sudden rush of emotions sallied forth to your heart and face, increasing the throbbing beats against your chest and igniting the burning heat over your cheeks. The things that his mere presence could do to you were impossible to be put into words. His statuesque form alone was sufficient to cast a spell on you. His silky silver hair was gliding entrancingly with the zephyr, and his beryl-green eyes glowed even in the dim light of the street. He was clad in a black fine suit, which fell into a fair contrast with the light tone of both his ivory skin and argent hair. He had a regal presence - simply put - majestic.
He was tucking one hand in his pocket while standing there silently, still looking in the opposite direction of you, when Angeal drew his attention: "So, Sephiroth... have you received any missions today?" He asked.
Sephiroth then began talking: "Nothing worth mentioning... minor ones only. It was quite disappointing though. Not that I'm looking for troubles or anything, but these stupid missions are not my..." he paused "...thing." He added the last part after his eyes had shifted from Angeal to look at you. They widened slightly as they prolonged their meticulous gaze upon your form. His crystal orbs roamed your resplendent body from toe to top. The combat boots that you'd usually wear were gone, along with the loose cargo pants, the plainly looking shirt and all the other "military" accessories, replaced by a pure delicacy. And your hair which was often, if not always, pulled back into a ponytail was now arranged in a simple yet lovely style. Before you could realize it, his eyes were no longer scanning your length; instead, they were fixed right onto your own, within them reflections of feelings and thoughts that you were unable to read or explain. His look was not impish as it usually would be, nor impassive. It was no doubt one of incredulity, of astonishment. His eyelids did not bat in the least, causing you to drown slowly and deeply into the icy ocean of his eyes. For a moment there, you felt as if everything and everyone else had vanished from existence, leaving you and Sephiroth alone in the midst of the seemingly frozen time.
The air felt tense and unbearably heavy as the two of you exchanged silent gazes, so you took the initiative to wipe the awkwardness away, muttering: "Good evening." You voice seemed to have awakened him from his motionless state, so he blinked his beautiful eyes then immediately looked away from you with what appeared to be a frown on his brow. "Hmph." He turned the other way and began walking toward the bar's entrance. "I'm going inside." He said, tonelessly.
A sudden stab of pain thrust through your chest at receiving his cold reaction, and you were too shocked to follow his receding steps with your eyes, for they kept staring at the spot where he stood a while ago, simply gazing at the empty space as if he was still there. Your throat went dry and your spirit sank in an instant. You felt a crystalline layer coating your orbs, and you felt the immediate urge to unleash your tears, when Zack called you, forcing you to hold back your emotions: "_______... are you coming or what?"
"Yes. Coming." You nodded.
**********
Once inside, the unpleasant smells of cigarettes and alcohol were the first to great your senses. The loud laughter of the scantily clad women and drunken men who had filled the bar was to contribute more to your disgust and vexation. You always hated places like this, and now you were convinced even more: such atmosphere, dimly lit and saturated with suffocating smokes, was not and never will be to your liking.
A hostess led the five of you to the table which Zack had reserved ahead of time, so you followed her to the heart of the bar. As soon as you have arrived to your table and before you have taken your seats, you heard a voice speaking in the background: "What a coincidence! I had never imagined that I'd find you here." You all turned your sights in the direction of the speaking voice and your eyes fell on a tall beautiful woman, and you must say, she was so pretty that she was able to earn long stares from the four men. From looking at her physical appearance alone, you could tell what kind of a woman she was: she looked dangerous. She had long blonde-dyed hair skillfully styled into large curls, seductive green eyes with long dark lashes, red lips with freshly-applied gloss, and a well-smothering foundation and face powder that have caused her visage to look perfectly flawless. She had a tall voluptuous body, dressed in a devilish crimson short dress with a halter strap around her neck and a sinful low V-cut for her chest. She cat-walked closer to the group, moving her hips sultrily while walking masterly on matching high heel pumps. She purred through a beguiling smile: "Nice to see you again... Sephiroth."
All whipped their heads to look at Sephiroth whose smirk has then appeared for the first time that evening: "Nice to see you too, Marika."
"Is this how you greet a lady?" She approached him and with a feline move, she threw her arms around his neck. "You haven't changed. after all."
Sephiroth hung his hands over her hips and smirked even wider: "I can say the same about you."
"Hmm? That's not how you respond. You should say: 'You've gotten even more beautiful, my love.' Something like that."
"Well... I guess that's true as well." He said.
She grabbed the nape of his neck and pulled him toward her, connecting her lips to his.
And... she kissed him.
"Oh my..." Genesis remarked, while Zack cleared his throat with embarrassment and Angeal grunted in disgust. But you... you were thunderstruck. Your whole body went numb and your heart was no longer throbbing with life. It was painful, agonizing to a limitless degree. Your soul was stabbed even more ferociously upon noticing Sephiroth's yielding reaction to Marika's coquetry. He did not resist her. No. He went along with her will. You turned your head to the side, attempting to take the two out of your sight, but the image of them kissing was engraved in your mind, and sorrow was already anchored over your heart. Why? Why is this happening?
"Did you miss me, baby?" She droned, sliding her hands to his chest.
"What are you doing here? You're... 'working', perhaps?" He asked, questionably.
"No... I'm not playing around anymore. I'm a good girl now." She replied, batting her lashes coyly. "You do know that my heart belongs to one man... and one man only."
"Right..."
"What are you doing here?"
"I came with some friends." He answered. She turned her sight to the other three handsome men and she smiled winsomely. "Would you mind introducing me to your hot friends, then?"
"This is the Humorless Poker-faced Angeal..." he said, pointing to each one of the three guys as he stated their names: "Genesis, the Annoying Poet, and Zack, the Puppy."
"Hi there." She uttered in a low alluring tone. She tilted her head to look somewhere behind the three men where you were standing, secluding yourself from sharing in their conversation, and she asked: "And, who's that?" They all turned to you while you looked at her, unable to answer, for you were completely tongue-tied thanks to the flow of very conflicting emotions within you. Sephiroth's smirk disappeared the moment his eyes had settled upon you, but he took the part to make the introductions: "This is _______. She's my..." he halted for a moment, gazing at you with his emerald orbs but then he closed his eyes and resumed: "She's just my apprentice."
Regardless of how desperate your need for crying was at that moment, you managed to keep your look solemn and unfazed. You have trained yourself hard for moments like this, to keep your emotions hidden in the deepest core of your soul, negligent of the ever-remaining scars that they might cause. Yet, for how long would you be still able to restrain your agony? You knew you were going to break, but you prayed it wouldn't be happening soon.
Marika eyed you critically, her aloof eyes scanning your form quite hostilely. She shifted her body even closer to Sephiroth's while her looks have changed drastically into a bewitching smile, saying: "Nice to meet you all. I am Marika..." Her tense eyes were fixed so rigidly onto yours that they could almost pierce your very orbs, as she continued in her provocative singsong tone: "and I am Sephiroth's girlfriend."
"What?!" Zack exclaimed. "Sephiroth! You never told us you had such a... such a fine... girlfriend!"
"Hold on a second." Sephiroth interrupted. "She's not." That alone regained your attention. He explained: "She's, actually... my Ex-girlfriend."
"Sephy!" She started whining. "That wasn't very nice!"
"I'm only stating facts, my dear."
She reached out and placed a kiss on his cheek: "We can always go back to being the lovey-dovey couple. Right?"
He took his eyes off Marika to glance at you, but you avoided the eye-contact. You weren't ready to face the sharp looks of his orbs. You then heard him utter: "We'll see about that."
Sephiroth and Marika were the first to head to the table and they both sat, naturally, next to each other. Zack followed and so did Genesis, but the latter was mumbling something under his breath: 'We didn't invite her to sit among us. Did we now?'
You took a step forward in order to join them but a hand was suddenly but gently placed on your shoulder, causing you to turn around and look at the owner of that hand: "Angeal?"
He, strangely, had a slight worried look on his face: "_______, are you alright? Would you like to go somewhere else?"
"Huh?!" you were absolutely surprised by his words. Did he notice something? Did your perfect façade fail to accomplish its purpose somehow? "I'm... I'm fine." You shook your head and put on a fake smile: "I'm perfectly fine." You placed your hand over his and said softly: "We should join the others... come on."
He sighed with displeasure and walked along with you to the table, taking a seat right beside you. After a short while, a waitress came and took everyone's orders; the group requested different kinds and brands of alcohol, but you chose to go with a glass of cold water. You didn't like to drink, and you were determined not to drink that night.
You sat silently, busying yourself with drinking your fresh beverage (apparently Angeal, Genesis and Zack were doing the same as you), obliged to hear the irritating and annoying chatter of Marika. She was leaning closely onto Sephiroth, holding her Tequila with one hand while playing with the man's black tie with her other. Her amused giggles, although low and well-played, were enough to pierce not only your ears but also your very heart. Sephiroth, however, didn't bother with responding to her actions - both verbal and physical - while he remained silent most of the time, satisfying her vigorous nature with a brief nod or a small hum, only occasionally.
You have intended to avoid looking directly at them, refusing to place yourself into awkward positions, so you managed to keep your eyes occupied by something else. Anything else, but that Marika. However, it wasn't easy to accept the fact that the man you adore was under the filthy spell of that woman, and it tormented you mercilessly. Hence, you weren't able to force their picture together out of your sight, so you had to take a quick glance at them every now and then. But each time you had allowed your eyes to peek at the couple in front of you, they were met by the compelling hue of his orbs staring right at you. Was it a coincidence? So you thought, but it wasn't, for sure. A fluke would happen once, hardly twice. But the same thing occurred each time your eyes stole a glance of him. His own eyes were upon you, and at each time you had looked at each other, a shiver came crawling down your spine, although the period within which the eye-contact had taken place went in a flash, for both of you had to snatch your eyes off of each other the very moment they met.
You didn't know why he was doing so: even as he was paying (or pretending to be paying) attention to the naughty woman beside him, he had his eyes settled on you and they didn't part unless you turned to look in his direction. It wasn't clear whether Marika had acknowledged Sephiroth's cool demeanor or not, but she was far from forgoing her chances of snatching the man's heart away. She snuggled against his chest and cuddled him flirtatiously, displaying a smug smile on her practically perfect visage.
Was she doing that on purpose? No, it can't be so. But why do her eyes sharpen antagonistically each time she glances at me? He'd already given her full permission to openly show her affections for him, why then does she seem to be raising a challenging duel against me? She can have him all to herself... I... I don't even want him... not anymore.
Marika let her fingers slide down Sephiroth's chest, and she unmannerly came even closer to him in attempt to give his lips another kiss. However, Angeal, whose eyebrows where nearly knit together for how serious his frown was, brought his fist up to his mouth and purposely cleared his throat in an obvious way, openly declaring how irritated he was. Sephiroth responded to Angeal's cue and he adjusted his posture, taking Marika's hand off of his chest.
Marika didn't like that, obviously, so she wasn't going to give up that easily: "Oh, I love this song! Come and dance with me, Sephiroth." She coquetted amorously. One old trick she used there!
"I'll finish my drink first." He said.
"Come on, Sephy!" She whined. He placed his glass down on the table, and surprisingly, his eyes were shot in your direction, speaking silent words that were not audible or understandable, but they made you experience all sorts of feelings except for easiness. He shut his eyes and played on a smirk: "I guess I am free to dance with you, Marika." Then he stood up and followed the woman to the dance floor. The group of men who were still sitting at the table followed the couple with their eyes, but you kept your gaze fixed downwards, no longer able to watch the intimate actions of those two. You wagged your fingers uncontrollably against the table's surface, while struggling hard to stay calm and poised despite the fire blazing within you. It's my fault... I've always liked him... I've always wanted him... I've always wished to be his. But why? Why did I fight it, even when my heart was melting into his arms?! Why did I reject him... although my eyes and my ears could see and hear none other than him?! Why did I ignore my feelings, though they were screaming: I love him?!
I... I'm...
...such a fool...
You bit your lower lip with regret, clenching your fists hard and causing your nails to sink into the delicate skin. You heard a heavy sigh coming from Angeal's mouth: "One thing I hate more than that woman." He said, clearly annoyed: "That double-faced Sephiroth." He almost hissed that last part.
"Well, that's him alright." Genesis added, humorously.
"Double-faced?!" Zack seemed to trust Sephiroth too much that he was utterly surprised by the title which Angeal had chosen for that Silver-haired male. "What do you mean?"
You could feel Angeal glancing at you from the corner of his eyes as he went on saying: "I don't understand his actions. Why is he treating that Marika in such a way while he doesn't even like her?"
"He must be up to something, I'm sure." Replied Genesis. "But as to why he's acting so, someone must be already acquainted with the reason." He added, bringing the rim of the alcohol glass to his lips while settling his eyes upon you. You were quick to turn your eyes away from him, breaking the brief eye-contact. You could detect the implication behind his words, so you wondered. Does he know?
You turned your head to look at the people on the dancing floor and watched Sephiroth and Marika dancing harmonically with the live music, his hands resting gently over the exposed flesh of her back, her arms forming a ring around his neck, her curvaceous figure entwined together with his robust body as they moved along with the tuneful song. Your heart sank deeper and deeper with every movement they made, and every smile she gave to him was a dagger rammed into your chest. A gentle hand moving over yours caused you to be startled, so you looked and found Angeal looking back at you after dropping that usual frowning face of his, and he uttered with a soft tone: "We can still go somewhere else, you know."
You just looked down and shook a 'no' with your head. They knew... they were aware of my feelings to him. Was it this obvious?! Was I too weak before them, that they were able to notice? Sephiroth... what have you done to me? Why am I so vulnerable around you?
"Well, if that someone doesn't take a step now and tell him the truth..." Genesis implied, "... it will be calamitously too late." You knew he was denoting you even though he was looking somewhere else in the bar, lazily resting his cheek on his knuckles.
Wordlessly and slowly, you stood up from your seat, gaining the men's attention - and a smirk from Genesis, of course - when Angeal asked you: "Are you going to tell him?"
"Tell who what?" Asked Zack, pretty much confused. Genesis, in turn , turned fully to look at you while foxily raising an eyebrow and keeping his smirk intact. A broken sigh escaped your mouth then you mumbled: "Excuse me... I'm... I'm going to the restroom."
"Seriously?" Genesis exhaled, almost face-palming. Angeal shook his head and followed you with his blue eyes as you walked away from them.
You went into the ladies' restroom, passing some women who were smoking and chatting inside the facility, and you walked into one of the stalls, closing the door behind you. You leaned your back against the door and exhaled heavily. As soon as you had ensured that you were alone, you dropped your façade of nonchalance and your eyes became immediately coated with glitter; with no reluctance, you bent your head downward and you let the tears flow freely down your cheeks and onto the floor. With hushed sobs, you cried. You wept. You whimpered. You slid down against the door's surface and crouched, hugging your knees and hiding your face between your arms. "Sephiroth... I'm sorry... but I..."
... I really love you.
To Be Continued...