You wake up because of your ringing alarm. You are lucky to have set it last night before going into Ushijima's room... Wait— You jump to grab your phone immediately, remembering where you are. You are alone in the big bed, but his scent and presence still linger there, wrapping around you like his arms did last night.
'What was that? And why didn't I push him away?! Oh God, he might think that I was the one that started cuddling with him'. You get up, but before you leave, you look around the room, since you couldn't see anything last night. It's not big, as expected from a college student; besides the bed, Ushijima has a desk, a mini bookshelf and of course, hand weights lying by the door. To be honest, you weren't expecting anything else from the stoic man.
As you step outside, you find Tendou already drinking his coffee while reading some school materials.
"Oh, good morning! I didn't know that we have another early bird in the house. Coffee?" You yawn, stretching your body and shake your head.
"I have to go back to change my clothes and grab my books so..." you take a sit at their table. "Ushijima left for school already?"
"He went out jogging," Tendou takes a sip from his coffee cup.
"And you wake up at the same time with him every day? The sun is barely out!" He puts the cup down and chuckles.
"Oh, no, no, no. I woke up to prepare something for our dear guest to eat, but then I remember that you have a strict diet. I couldn't fall back asleep though so I started to look over my classes," he flashes you a wide grin and you feel the same chills all over your body, like in the same way you did when you met him. "Speaking of our precious guest, when I woke up and didn't find you on the couch, I assumed that you left in the middle of the night. But my, oh my, when Wakatoshi-kun opened the door of his bedroom and I saw you there... Like, I always knew that Wakatoshi-kun is a quiet guy, but to be that quiet when fu—"
"Stop, stop, stop!" You cover his mouth with your hands and then your red face, totally embarrassed about the position you were caught in. "It was cold! And I—uhm"
"I know, (Name)-chan. He told me," Tendou giggles at you. "But it's nice to see Wakatoshi-kun being so close to a person of the opposite gender. He's always so stiff around girls, we assumed that he was gay at first"
"That's kind of rude... So, is this what he can learn from me? How to be in a relationship with someone?"
"To be more open with the others. You might find it hard to believe, but he looks up to you. You're one year older than him, but you're already a star in the volleyball world. And if you return, I'm sure that the national team will recruit you," Tendou pauses and his smile fades away. He's now looking back at his notes and it seems like he's deeply troubled. "As his friend, I would say that he's like that to girls because he has no interest in something else besides volleyball," his voice drops a tone, "but as someone who's going to work with children, I can say that his coldness is due to the divorce of his parents"
Oh... You just stare at him dumbfounded. Is there an actually way to answer to this? He gets up before you have the chance to say anything.
"Wakatoshi-kun will be back soon. You can wait for him and leave together"
"No, it's okay—" The front door opens and a sweaty Ushijima removes his shoes before stepping inside.
"I'll go shower and change. Wait here," you nod and in less than 10 minutes you are out of the door as Tendou waves at you two before he closes and locks their apartment.
"I'm sorry," Ushijima says after a while of you just walking and not talking, "I didn't mean to grab you like that last night," your face is red again.
"N-No, I... I actually enjoyed it. You are a great person to cuddle with," you smile at him, both your hearts skipping a beat.
"Is that so? Thank you." It wasn't necessary a compliment; a big person like Ushijima is basically a giant teddy bear.
When you reach the street of your building, you feel like you're about to throw up, but you swallow it back in. You knock on your door with a shaky hand since you've left your keys behind. Ushijima is right behind you; the silver-haired man opens it. He looks surprised to see you back so soon. But then immediately jumps in your arms, actually, cages you between his big ones.
"We were so worried! Do you know how worried I was? I wanted to go out and look for you, but then—"
"Okay, okay, I get it!" You push him away. "You're going to wake up the whole building, you loud bastard!" You sigh. God, you missed him. As you all get inside and shut the door behind you, another door opens in your apartment and the tall middle blocker is now in front of you. The first thing you notice is the mark of your palm, still there, but barely visible on his cheek. He looks dumbfounded and before you get a chance to say something, he bows almost at 90 degrees.
"I'm sorry for what I did to you last night!" He shouts. "I have no excuse for it a-and if-if you want to move out, that's totally understandable!" He doesn't rise up, waiting for your response. His eyes are looking down and they are red. You walk towards him, grab him by the shoulder and push him up. Your arms wrap themselves around his neck.
"You have been there for me when everyone else abandoned me. If it weren't for you two, I don't know what would have happened to me that day, so I owe you my life. Let's just put this behind us, okay? Forget that it ever happened and get back to our bickering," Kuroo doesn't trust his mouth to speak so he nods, returning the hug. Bokuto joins too as Ushijima stays behind and looks at you with a smile on his face.
After the moment ends, you wipe away the few tears from your eyes and turn to face the olive-haired athlete.
"I hope that the position for the manager of your team is still available," is his turn to be surprised. Your roommates are too. "I will pay with my own money for the rest of the year left and return to my hometown in spring. But before that, I want to do this one more thing"
Even though you're smiling at him, your heart is aching. All of the things you loved in this life ended up hurting you at one point. You know that being the manager, being so much around him, will hurt more when you leave Tokyo in the spring, but you still want to be closer to him, to volleyball. It is a double-edged-sword that's definitely going to scar you for life, especially since Ushijima will never be like your ex-boyfriend. He can truly make you happy.
•••
You still don't understand what made you accept his proposal, maybe it was your worthless pride, maybe it was your barely-alive passion for the sport, but something told you to do it. Your job won't be that hard anyway; you will be helping the players and keeping record of their performances. After all, you had managers both in high-school and college, so you pretty much know what you have to do.
Oikawa was ecstatic when he heard about it, assumed that you would return to the team or had started dating Ushiwaka, but he asked the wing spiker and was given a deep frown and a simple 'no'. So, then he had to ask you about it. You told him everything, this time not only you left out the part about your ex, but also the fact that you and Ushijima slept together.
"Things started piling up and before I knew it, I was about to explode again", you tell him, also mentioning that what Kuroo did was the breaking point. To say that he is surprised is an understatement. He was about to take a bite from his sandwich, but now his mouth hangs open and he blinks a few times, like he's reanalyzing your words.
"Are you sure about this?" The setter asks you.
"Yes. I won't return to playing volleyball anyway and I won't remain in Tokyo. I just need something to keep myself busy with," the innocent and unaffected expression is slowly cracking.
But you chose this. You have to accept the consequences. Every-time you played, even at practice, you ended up hurting yourself. There was always a new bruise on your body. And it was mostly because of your style of bumping into players.
Keishin will be so mad at you; he'll probably stop talking to you for days, but you'll accept it. You'll carry your own cross without looking back.
The day went on so fast. You wanted your last class to go on forever because after it you have to head to the gym to meet your new 'team'. Are you starting to regret it this early? Maybe. You've changed your clothes in the locker room and are now standing in front of the gym door, waiting, but for nothing in particular. You exhale, gather up your courage and step inside.
It feels like you are star-struck as you watch the olive-haired ace jump to hit the ball tossed to him. His mid-air form makes it look like he's floating, giving him an advantage in the battles. The ball hits the ground on the other side with a powerful sound, bouncing off towards the ceiling.
By now, they have acknowledged your presence and have stopped playing. Ushijima turns towards you, face red with sweat dripping from the sides. His breathing is ragged, mouth slightly opened. Your knees almost go weak.
'Oh, I fucked up, big time', you think as your heart is pounding in your chest. This is going to be much harder than you've imagined.
•••••••••••••••
I'm so stupid, I wanna cry. I just managed to fuck up my entire planning for this story. The beginning part with the reader returning home wasn't planned, but I decided to write it anyway and then I made it too big.... But I did write about 40% of what I had to write in this chapter so congrats me. If I keep doing this, I'll reach more than 25 chapters istg.
I said that I wanted to finish L.W. by the end of July, but there are 10 days left and I have what, the other half left to write? I'm never writing something this big, never ever again.