excuse any mistakes..
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Dimoni Mercedes Walker🗽
Harlem, New York.
"Ka-Kari please come get me!" I cried as I tried to keep my eyes open
"what's going on?! where are you." He said
"at the house."
the phone dropped out my hand once my stomach started to hurt worse. he stayed on the phone trying to make sure I was still there. his voice began going in and out with every word
"I'm sorry for everything." my eyes grew heavy once my body felt limp
hearing the front door open widely he ran over to me grabbing my torso
"stay with me Dimoni, shit!"
he took his phone out calling the police, after speaking for a minute he hung up not caring anymore
with that being said he stuck his finger down my throat preparing me to spit up the pills immediately
as I coughed them up I glanced in his eyes for a moment watching him shake his head
I took the water bottle from him rubbing my tears slightly still coughing
"drink it bro." he tilted it up
I drunk the rest spitting out on the floor letting the last pill drop on the wood
he let go of me sitting my body on the side of the bed going through the drawer finding a long white tee
I changed my top wiping my mouth
no matter how many times I thought about taking my life, I just couldn't seem to do it.. this time I was so close
"are you okay?" my aunt came in the room touching my face with her boyfriend behind her
I slapped her hand away, she knew what was going on and didn't even bother to help me
"I want you out this house sharp in the morning! can't take this shit no more." she slammed the door
Kari took my stuff up out the drawers and put everything into my empty bags and some in trash bags
once I got my strength back I slipped my crocs on. I began to wash my face staring at myself in the mirror
why couldn't I be happy...
"you ready?" he asked as I nodded
he held my bags as we left out the house her boyfriend had stopped me
"take this." he handed me a stack of money with a lump in the middle which happened to be a pill
I shook my head holding onto Kari's hand as we left out
Kari hadn't said anything else to me until we got in the car
"how long you been taking them shits?" he asked me sitting back in the driver seat
I didn't respond I just played with the jibbizt on my crocs
"I asked you a question," he said getting mad
"don't remember..." I lied
I knew exactly when I started if I had told him, he'd probably kill both of us in this car
"whatever Mercedes I'm taking you to the crib."
watching the rain hit the window I sighed knowing the ride wasn't gonna be too long
September 4th...
two months later...
"Moni grab those last bags out the closet and hand them to your brother." my pops said to me as we unpacked the groceries
"Okay well I'm about to go out," I told him passing by Bakari, my older brother
He looked me up and down examining my outfit then shaking his head
"Change your shirt." was all he told me before going back in his room
I mumbled myself to the room and found a longer top. My outfit wasn't bad I had jeans and a gray tank top that was cut short that hid under my sweater
This nigga sucks mad dick
I changed quickly than fixed my hair again making sure I was straight
After cleaning my bed up I took the money and wallet sitting on my dresser leaving the crib
"soon as the street lights come on" my pops yelled from the window
"Ight!" I hollered back rolling my eyes
My phone buzzed making me huff and look at it
Kari😒
Be back @8
I left him on reading and walked towards the park seeing a few familiar faces, even though I wasn't going to hang out with anyone I still wanted to be out of the house
Making it to the park I went to the bench I usually sit at and got comfortable opening up my journal. This was my third time switching homes and honestly, I was tired of it
after my grandparents passed away I stayed at my aunt's house, eventually, she kicked me out once her boyfriend moved in. now I was back at my fathers, he and I didn't have a great connection but he was around sometimes
Bakari was his favorite so he stayed with him soon as my mom got a divorce, she moved away later on
I sighed taking my black Paper Mate pen writing as I thought
before I wrote another word two boys ran past me one tripping over my foot
"bro what the fuck!" he looked up from the ground seeing my face
any other person would've said sorry, but I just stared at him as we locked eyes for a couple of seconds
"so you not gonna say sorry?" he asked dusting off his shorts
too damn cold for that
does it look like imma say sorry?
"my bad," I said bluntly closing my journal popping my gum
he looked at me again and got up smacking my pen out my hand, his friend soon came up to us looking at the pen
I rolled my eyes picking it up along with my mini bookbag
"you from around here? I never see you." his friend asked me handing my journal to me
I grabbed it from him slightly shaking my head
"my pops is," I responded speaking up a bit
he nodded taking his hand out for me to shake
"I'm Tylil, and that's Siah rude ass." he chuckled pushing him over
I shrugged
"I guess you want my name now??" I said looking confused
"duh nigga."
where are the parents at my god
"Dimoni."
"cute, why you out here alone Dimoni. shit get's crazy over here," he asked sitting next to me
"ever thought that I didn't ask..." I rolled my eyes in the process of making sure I had everything
"I didn't either."
"go to your home sir."
Tylil smirked at me and looked at the time then
at Siah, which was to be glaring at me
"can I have my face back," I let out standing up
"I like you shawty, remind me of this nigga." he smiled standing up as well
"Okay well, I'ma go about my night now." I walked away only for them to follow me
I walked a bit faster with them right on my ass, crossing the street I went into the store picking some snacks then paying for them
"$5.25," ock said passing me my bag
leaving out the store Tylil stood outside smoking a blunt wrapping an arm around me
"get off me." I rolled my eyes pushing his arm
"c'mon shawty be my friend," he inhaled the smoke looking at me
nothing but trouble
"if I say yes will you leave me the fuck alone," I said looking at Siah
"sure," he grinned once more passing the blunt
the time read 12:34 am
"goodnight." I put my headphones in turning up my music leaving them behind
How I adore our love would be so true
I just wish you knew
I'd be all yours if my mind didn't wander, I've got scars
From a life before you
Please don't think I'm insecure
I just can't trust no one else
Please don't think I'm insecure
I just feel safe by myself
when I got near the building I passed by Bakari's friend knowing that he was around
I pulled my top down a bit and waited for the elevator
"so you live in this building too." I heard somebody laugh making me turn back
does he have a home...
as I ignored him I got on the elevator pressing 13 playing my music again
Tylil pressed 8 standing next to me
"you know we friends now right?" he said seriously taking one of my earbuds out
"whatever."
"hang out with me tomorrow."
I shook my head laughing
"what would I be hanging out with you for.."
"If you don't I'll just knock on your door till you come out." he said getting off the elevator dancing swiftly "see you, tomorrow friend."
niggas are so weird, probably will never see him a day in my life after this
—
"So you didn't think to send me a text or call me saying you we're going to be late. Anything could've happened to you Dimoni, I told you when the streetlights come on to be in this house." my father lectured hitting the table
"okay. I'm here now right, you see me sitting here ion even know why you care." I said softly picking at my food that was now cold
"you talk to me as if I haven't done shit for you."
"when was the last time you did something for ME?! not Bakari, but for me when's the last time you showed up for any type of school events. what about the time I was in the hospital?!"
at this point I wasn't hungry anymore, I just wanted to take a nap and lock myself in the room for the rest of the night
Bakari came out of the bathroom fixing his shirt then going to the table to sit with us. we're the only family that I know who waits for everyone so we could eat
"don't come to me with that shit." he spat staring me down
"whatever."
I removed myself from the table going back to my room slamming the door
"open this door Dimoni," Bakari said shaking the doorknob
bringing the Xanax out my top dresser, I put one in my mouth downing it with my water
I wasn't taking them for fun I took them when I got overwhelmed, my pops tried to send me to the hospital when he first found out but I begged him not to so now I'm here.
a couple of months later, which is now I was doing better than I first left off at
he continued to shake the door then gave up walking away from the door
I laid my head down getting as comfortable as I could falling asleep
"yeah she's starting this shit again," he spoke walking past my door again
Bakari Walker
Harlem, New York.
"aye pops I'll be back in a few," I told him before leaving out
I walked down the staircase making sure nothing touched the walls. 'cause niggas is nasty for real
"wassup, bro," Kenny said dapping me up
"we out?"
with that being said we headed over to the chicken spot, my girl was over there chatting wit' some nigga. I didn't even understand why she was out this late on top of that it's cold outside
"Kamiyah bro I will suffocate you in front of all these people, don't fucking play with me." I sped walk towards her snatching the glasses off her face
"Bakari stop!" she tried snatching them away from me, but I had already stomped on them grabbing her as well
"I'll see ya tomorrow."
I drug her across the street not caring if my grip was tight or not
"I will kill you and tell you're mother I killed you. I'm not any of them lil boys."
"look at me when I'm speaking to you!"
she lifted her face giving eye contact
"aii," she muttered
"speak up." I put my mouth to her ear
"I said aight damn, " she said leaning on the brick wall
"fuck you doing out here this late anyways damn near two in the morning." I jerked her again sending her to the building
"bird ass."
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Excuse any mistakes
40+ votes && comments
this book is going to be a TAD different and I won't hesitate to delete it like everything else.
August 6th