Summary: I was tired, 'k?
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"It was revealed during today's press conference that Spider-Man is actually a Spider-Boy! For more news, stay tuned to Insert name here 'cause I'm not creative," the channel's host said with a big smile.
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"Today, in Insert name again, we will be discussing Spider-Man's unexpected personality-"
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The host sipped her coffee. "I'm telling you, Name shouldn't get involved in superhero business."
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"We're back from the commercial break! Specialists today will be analyzing Spider-Man's attitude to determine if what he said about his age was true. Don't miss it, only in You know the drill already!"
("He quoted a vine, he wasn't lying.")
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"I said it before, and I'll say it again, there's no way someone can lift a five story warehouse and them fight in a plane. We shouldn't spread lies in Yadda yadda-"
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"I should be doing hw but whatever will be discussing today Spider-Man's background story-"