D a w n :
I woke up to the sound of crying.
No, wailing actually. It sounded automated and it would not stop.
I groaned, "Lane?"
"Yeah?" He croaked.
"What the fuck is going on?"
"How can you curse so early in the morning?" He groaned.
"It's really not that hard if you put your mind to it."
I heard him chuckle.
I smiled, but my mind was still jumbled from being awake so early.
"No, but seriously, what's going on?" I asked.
"I...I think it's...the baby?"
Are you fucking kidding me right now?
I heard a whimper escape my throat.
"Are you crying?" He asked.
"I'm so fucking tired." I said, pulling the pillow over my ears, but it didn't help. I could still hear the doll crying.
Being a parent is still hard even when it's not a real baby.
"Ugh!" I threw the pillow on the floor, rolling over to face Lane.
He rolled over from his side too, facing me.
"You look like shit." I mused, a small smile tugging on my lips.
He made a face, fanning the air in front of his nose. "Ew, morning breath." He said.
I held my nose. "You too, ugh." I rolled over, getting out of the bed. "I'm gonna go brush my teeth, it's your turn to handle that baby."
He rolled his eyes, getting out of bed and scratching his belly that was conveniently exposed since he refused to sleep in a shirt.
"You don't even look that tired." He said.
"Yeah, I've done this a lot." I said.
I went into the bathroom, closing the door, which I could still hear that baby through. After about a minute, the crying stopped and I finished getting ready, leaving the bathroom.
Lane was now laying on the bed with the baby next to him. He looked over to me, smiling.
"What?" I asked, now smiling as well.
"The baby was hungry." He said, "Probably still is."
"So?" I asked, picking up a shirt from my dresser.
"Aren't you gonna breastfeed him?" He asked.
I raised an eyebrow at him. "Lane, 'he's' a fucking doll."
Lane's jaw dropped and he grabbed the baby, covering its ears. "Not in front of the baby!" He said.
We stared at each other for a minute, before smiles broke out on both our faces and caused us to both burst out into laughter.
"You're so weird." I said, chuckling.
He winked at me, "Just protecting the baby." He said, getting up to go to the bathroom. "If I don't, next thing you'll be telling him he's adopted."
He entered the bathroom, but didn't close the door and I could see him brushing his teeth in the sink.
"Hey, how did you even get the baby to stop crying anyway?" I asked, putting on a skirt.
"I took out his battery." He said.
My eyes widened. "You what?"
I ran over to the baby, turning him over frantically. I let out a deep breath when I saw the 93 still on the back.
He came out of the bathroom, looking at me amusedly. "Chill, I just reset it and put it back in."
"First of all, my grades are very important, so don't tell me to 'chill'." I said, using air quotes. "And secondly, I didn't even know you could reset it, but if you did, then why don't we have a one hundred?"
He walked over to the closet. "It reset the functions on him, making him not need to be hungry, you can't reset the grade on him though. Trust me, if you could, I'd have done it by now."
I shook my head at him. "Wow, I didn't know you were a cheater."
He shrugged. "As far as I'm concerned, it's not cheating if I were to use my natural skills for a fair advantage. Now are you going to leave or do you want to watch me undress?" He asked, teasingly tugging at his sweatpants.
I sighed, getting up off the bed with the baby. "I'm leaving." I said.
He pouted. "Aw, I was hoping you'd join me."
"We have to be married at least five days for naked stuff, sorry."
He sighed. "I understand."
I laughed, leaving the room. "I'm gonna make breakfast."
He smiled. "You, Dawn Caparelli, are the dream wife."
* - * - *
"Guess who got CEO?" Lane asked, coming out of the bedroom.
"Oh congrats!" I said.
He smiled, "Yeah, they said that I was the most realistic and the most logical thinker or something."
"Oh! That makes sense, they guy who thinks our doll can hear us."
He narrowed his eyes at me. "You're just jealous."
I shrugged. "I am actually, I don't wanna stay at home with that thing every day."
"Wow, you really don't like kids." He said.
I shook my head. "No, that's not it, I jus-I...nevermind."
"No, no, what is it?" He asked.
I looked up at him. "It doesn't matter."
"You can talk to me." He said.
I nodded. "I know...just...it's not that. I really do like babies...I just-If you couldn't tell already, I don't like to get emotionally invested in things."
He gave me a small smile. "Like you said, it's just a doll."
I chuckled. "I guess it is."
"And it's okay, I'll pass a new law making us Co-CEO's." He said, changing the subject.
I rolled my eyes. "You're a CEO Lane, not the freaking president."
He shrugged. "I'm pretty sure I can still do that though."
"What do you want to do today?" I asked.
He shrugged again. "I don't know, do you usually go to church on Sundays?"
I nodded. "Sometimes...usually actually, I haven't been in a few months though."
"Hmm...well do you want to go today? I'll come with you if you want."
I smiled at him. "Yeah, that'd be nice." I said, putting my plates in the sink. "Let me get my stuff."
We cleaned up the dishes and then got ready to leave, which for Lane was grabbing a can of soda from the fridge. By the time we were done it was just about time to make it to a service so we left the apartment, going outside. I was walking in the direction of the bus stop, but Lane stopped me.
"I have my car here." He said.
"What? How did you get it here?" I asked.
"I passed by my house on the way to the interviews." He said, looking proud of himself.
I chuckled, getting into the passenger side of his large black car.
"It's a nice car." I said, putting the baby on my lap.
"Yep." He muttered. "Isn't my dad great?"
I gave him a smile, noticing some tension in the subject. "Hey," I said, putting a hand on his shoulder. "If it makes you feel any better, my dad got me shampoo for my birthday."
He looked over at me and sighed, a smile forming on his face. "That actually helps."
I chuckled. "I thought it would."
I sighed, smiling, because even though my dad only got me shampoo, I love him so much for it. He does what he can and he's the most amazing dad I could ask for. The way Lane talks about his dad doesn't imply the kind of love that I have in my own relationship with my father.
"Which way is your church?" He asked.
"Here." I handed him my phone with the address in the maps so that he could follow it.
He turned on the radio which started blasting some Top 40s music that we both cringed at.
"Ew, I'm changing this." I said, turning the knob until I reached a station that was playing good music.
We ended up jamming to Maroon 5 the entire ride.
Lane had ended up taking some weird sort of back road to the church, but we were almost there when he drove past a building I thought I would never see again.
"Oh my God!" I gasped.
"What? What?" He asked, frantic and trying not to take his eyes off the road.
"That's the roller rink my dad used to take me to when I was younger! Oh my God, can we please go to it?"
"I thought we were going to church?" He asked, confused.
I turned to him, pleading. "Please Lane, I haven't been there in years."
He shrugged. "Sure, but I'm gonna have to break some traffic laws to make a U-turn here."
I looked out the back window to see an empty road.
"Welp, there's nobody watching." I said.
He chuckled, turning the steering wheel sharply and I had to hold the side of the car as he made the U-turn and we made our way to the roller rink.
* - * - *
**play the song on the side now**
"Yes, hi I'd like three tickets." Lane said, "One for me, my wife and our child."
The man behind the desk looked confused and startled by the fake baby.
"Excuse me?" He asked.
"Yes?" Lane asked, "Is there a problem?"
By now I was cracking up behind Lane.
He looked from me to Lane, clearly upset. "You can pay for three skates but you only getting two, and I'll gladly take the tip." He said.
Lane frowned. "Fine, we'll have two, gosh." He muttered.
The man handed us our skates and I gave him a quick apology before leaving to the rink.
"You have no idea how to act in public." I said.
"I think that man's lack of a sense of humor was the problem." He said, sitting down on the bench to put on his skates.
He tossed his can of soda into the trash can next to him without looking.
"Do you really not see the recycling bin right next to it?" I asked.
He smiled at me. "Oops."
I sighed. "It's people like you who don't care about the climate that are ruining the world."
"Hey!" He protested, "I care about the climate, I just wasn't looking, here." He got up and reached into the trashcan, retrieving his can and throwing it into the recycling bin. "Happy?"
I smiled, nodding. "Now just go wash your hands."
He rolled his eyes but left to wash his hands, and when he came back I was finished lacing up my shoes and I picked up the baby, going into the rink.
"Here, I'll hold him." Lane said.
"You sure?" I asked.
He nodded. "It's your first time here in years, enjoy yourself."
I looked up at him and he smiled at me, I smiled back, handing the doll to him before going out onto the floor. They had 80's disco music playing and everybody in the rink was dancing as they skated, you could feel the beat in everybody and there was a certain energy that flowed through the room that I really missed.
I clapped above my head to the music as I skated.
"Whoo!" I yelled, zipping through people.
The music brought me right back to my childhood when my dad and I would come here and I barely knew how to skate. I used to hold his hand as he'd lead me through the crowds.
Now I was basically a pro as I danced through people, skating happily. I felt the air whip at my legs, glad I wore a skirt today.
I had made a few rounds when I saw Lane skating slowly with the baby, looking at me with amusement on his face.
"Freak out!" I sang along with the music.
He laughed, "You look like you're having fun."
"Aren't you?" I asked, "Do you know how to skate?"
He nodded. "Yeah, but I enjoy watching you more."
I rolled my eyes, holding out my hand to him. "Come on."
He smiled, transferring the baby to his other hands and taking mine.
His hand was warm and I liked the way it felt on mine. We started skating faster, and I looked over to see him smiling and picking up speed.
"Yeah!" He yelled, getting into the mood in the rink.
I laughed, dancing as I skated along with him.
"Oh, freak out!" We said together, along with the song, laughing as we sung. At that moment, we blended into the mold of people skating through the rink and we could feel the energy in the room and it was amazing.
I looked down at our intertwined hands and I couldn't get the smile off my face. Watching him skate and move and yell the words to the song was the best thing I could've asked for.
* - * - *
"You know, we should name the baby." He said, laying on the carpet.
We had been home for about an hour and were absolutely exhausted from skating and singing around all afternoon, but it was a great day.
I laid on the couch next to him in front of the open windows so that we could catch the sun before it set.
"Oh, how about Emily!" I suggested.
He sat up now, looking at me. "Wow, I didn't think I'd have to teach you this." He said.
I looked over at him. "What?"
He picked up the baby, taking off its clothes. "Okay, time for Anatomy 101." He said, pointing to the dolls genital area, "This right here, is what we call a penis Dawn, and little plastic penis."
I rolled my eyes. "Yes, I get that, but we can still name him Emily, he's our baby."
"But he'll get teased at school." Lane said.
"Then you can go and intimidate the bullies." I said.
He laid back down, in thought. "Why was Emily the first name that came to your mind though?"
"Me and Daryll were gonna name our baby Emily when we were supposed to be partners." I told him.
He nodded. "Ah...because he's such an integral part of this marriage." He said sarcastically.
I rolled my eyes. "Come on, think about it, how original is our baby boy being named Emily? And Daryll doesn't even get to have one now, so this is the least I could do for him."
"Hmm..." Lane thought about it, "Baby Emily Evans..."
"Hey! Why can't he get my last name?" I asked.
"Because Emily Caparelli sounds like it came out of a Dr. Seuss book." He said.
I laughed at that, lightly tossing a pillow at him. "Shut up."
"Don't worry, our future kids will get your name." He said.
"Future kids?" I asked.
"Yeah," He nodded, "I'll run by the supermarket and get us one next week."
I shook my head, laughing. "You're such a good dad."
The song at the top is Le Freak by Chic