5.
The weekend passed by quickly and there was still no sign of Duncan. Lillian spent the days crying hysterically. She felt guilty about everything that happened; she had no idea how Duncan felt. She hadn't considered how much the move could've upset him. Conan was her main focus because of how much he was struggling. She felt like the worst mother in the entire world for neglecting him.
When Jon wasn't busy working at his new office job, he was comforting his wife. He was angry at Duncan for blowing up. If he had just been upfront about what he was thinking then things could've gone much smoother.
Conan cried himself to sleep the night of their fight but that was the end of it. He only let himself cry in small amounts because if he let go again, he'd never get back up, so he scrolled through his phone and stalked Owen's Instagram to pass time instead.
But now he was sitting in his economics class, trying not to panic again. It was seventh period and after was tryouts for track. Owen told him he didn't have to worry about his performance since he was the captain and already accepted him onto the list, but that didn't deter the nerves prodding at his skin.
"I want you all to read chapter four tonight and complete the worksheet I'm going to pass around," the teacher said as she walked down the row of desks to hand every student a piece of paper.
Conan's leg bounced up and down anxiously, staring at the clock and trying to remain neutral. It would be so embarrassing to show up looking like a scared little kid. They were just running around. There wasn't much that could go wrong.
He put the paper inside his folder and shoving it into his backpack right as the dismissal bell rang. All the students flooded out of the room at the sound, a few cheering on their way out. Conan was the opposite as he trudged out of the room, messing with the straps of his backpack while he walked toward the gym.
It was a bit of a walk since the school was ginormous so when he got there it was already full of kids. If Owen hadn't already assured him a spot on the team then he would've left already.
The gymnasium was huge and smelled like sweat. The ceiling was so high he had to crane his neck all the way up just to see the top. Lights were shining down brightly and made him wince.
He looked around at everyone stretching while chatting with their friends. Everyone was laughing and looked so confident.
Conan turned to leave but bumped into Owen who had a smile as bright as the lights on his handsome face.
"You made it!" he exclaimed, giving one of those cool bro handshakes to Conan who had no idea what he was doing. "I was worried you wouldn't show."
"I debated it but figured you'd come find me so it was useless," Conan half-joked.
Owen chuckled and slung an arm around the shorter boy's shoulder, leading him. "Smart thinking. Practice starts in a few minutes and I need to change clothes. Did you bring some with you?"
Conan realized Owen was bringing him to the locker room. The boys' locker room. He had never been in one before and the cogs in his brain were turning. The thought of going in made him scared, but he had Owen with him. No one would hurt him if he was there.
There was also the fact that he was an idiot and didn't bring different clothes so he didn't have to worry about changing in front of Owen anyway.
"I was just going to keep this on," he answered meekly and Owen furrowed his brows, inspecting his clothes. He was wearing jeans and a hoodie.
"You can't run in jeans." He laughed and held the locker room door open for him. "I've got some stuff you can change into. Give me a sec."
Conan paddled awkwardly inside and looked around. It smelled equally as gross but wasn't anything special. He stood in the center, swaying back and forth uncomfortably as Owen dug through his locker.
"These will be kinda big on you but there's a string you can tie." He tossed a balled-up pair of shorts to Conan who, thankfully, caught it. "This is big too but it's better than sweating in that hoodie." He flung him a shirt next.
"Thanks," Conan mumbled, heart racing when Owen tore his shirt off.
His back was facing Conan but the muscles in it were still prominent, revealing the expanse of his muscular biceps as well.
He looked like a model Conan would see on magazines and be jealous of. Though he wasn't feeling jealous right then, he felt like he was about to pass out, yet somehow in a good way.
"We're going to start off with some stretching and then a lap around the gym," Owen babbled, pulling his joggers down so that he was left in tight boxers. Conan felt woozy and tore his eyes away with a red face. He was being a total creep.
He wasn't sure what the protocol was for situations like these. He was scared to do something that would weird Owen out. Turning his back, he switched into Owen's shorts.
"Then we'll do a couple races and that's about it. It's pretty easy so you shouldn't worry." He talked mindlessly as Conan's body went haywire.
"Yeah." His voice cracked and he cringed at the sound. He tried to ignore it, tying the string as tight as he could pull it. Owen was right. His clothing was gigantic on him.
Now he was supposed to change into his shirt. He had top surgery so it wasn't awful wearing tighter clothing, he just preferred baggier things that could hide his feminine features like the slight curve of his hips and slim arms. But the scars were still visible and Owen wouldn't think twice about asking him if he had gotten attacked by a shark or something.
He played with the hem of his hoodie as he mentally debated what he should do. Owen was still facing his locker, but what if he turned around?
"I'll see you out there man." He lightly tapped Conan's shoulder as he strode out of the locker room.
"Thank fuck," Conan muttered to himself, quickly changing into the shirt.
He had no idea how he was going to survive every practice like then. He'd just have to change in the private bathroom or wear it under his hoodie before meetings.
He was regretting his decision to join the team. He really didn't want this anymore but Owen looked so happy when he showed up. Owen had a bubbly personality and Conan knew he probably didn't really care, that the boy was just being nice, but a deeper part of him hoped it was something more.
Conan considered himself a straight male because he didn't want to be submissive. He didn't want to be 'the girl' in a relationship. Though when he thought about it with Owen, it didn't bother him as much.
He blushed at the thought. "What the hell am I thinking?" he grumbled to himself, leaving the locker room while shaking his head. He was crazy. Absolutely insane.
Owen was a popular jock. A popular straight jock with a beautiful girlfriend. Even if Conan happened to be interested in another boy it wouldn't matter. He brushed off the thought.
"Line up!" He saw Owen and the coach guiding students in sections as they all stretched so he quickly jogged over, nervously standing beside a girl who was bending over touching her toes.
"Hey," she chirped and Conan glanced at her, surprised she was talking to him.
"Uh, hi." He rubbed his elbow. Why did he have to be so damn awkward?
"I'm Cailey," she introduced. She had her shoulder-length blue hair pulled back into a small bun. The color contrasted with her dark skin and dark brown eyes prettily.
She was really short which immediately made Conan like her. He loved when he was taller than people.
"I'm Conan," he replied and started to do the same stretches as everyone else.
"Are you a freshman?" Cailey asked him as she stood up straight.
"I'm actually a senior." He blushed. He had a baby face because of his soft features and it made him look a lot younger than he really was.
"Oh, my bad." She laughed while tightening her ponytail. "Me too. Are you new to the team then? I've never seen you before."
Conan nodded. "Yeah. It's my first year here."
"Do you like it so far? The girls here are really cute." Cailey gushed, "I guess the guys are too, if you swing that way. None of them are my taste though."
His ears perked up. He had never met anyone else who was LGBT in person before.
"Are you a lesbian?" he asked before realizing it was probably rude. He didn't know the proper protocol for this kind of stuff either. Texas was full of homophobic, racist southerners. This was his first time talking to someone else like him.
"Yeah." She yawned as Conan was baffled at how casual she was about it. "Are you gay?"
"No," he paused, thinking about Owen, "I think I'm, um, bisexual." He said the last word in a whisper, not used to being able to talk about sexuality freely.
"You don't have to whisper. Nobody cares here," she giggled, finding Conan's reaction endearing.
"Oh." He swallowed. He still wasn't comfortable enough to talk about anything like that publicly. Cailey was an exception.
"Alright! Let's run some laps!" the coach yelled.
Owen was the first person to start running as he led the direction of the crowd. His golden hair was pushed away from his forehead as he jogged around the basketball court. He was abnormally fast even just warming up.
"Damn," Cailey whistled, looking at Owen. "That's the one and only boy I would go hetero for."
Conan almost agreed with her but zipped his mouth shut. There was no way he could start crushing on the first person to be nice to him. No way. He wouldn't allow it.
"Don't tell my girlfriend that though," she snickered and jogged after everyone else. Conan followed her.
"You have a girlfriend?" he questioned with wide eyes.
"Yeah, her name's Sophie." Cailey smiled to herself. "I swear I'm going to marry that woman one day."
The happy look on Cailey's face traveled to Conan's. He liked the idea of being able to be with whoever you wanted to be with. His old school was the opposite. If you didn't blend in and follow all of the societal norms then you were an outcast. This place was different.
"You should come to GSA with me." She panted as she started to feel a little out of breath after their third lap.
"GSA? What's that?" Conan was still full of energy even on his fourth.
"It's the Gay-Straight Alliance Club. You can meet other homos there."
"You have a club for that here?" His school in Texas would die before that ever happened there.
"Yup. There's a meeting on Thursday." She wiped the sweat off of her forehead. "Do you want to come with me?"
He pondered her offer. That would go against his number one rule of blending in but someone had just asked to hang out with him. He couldn't remember the last time he was invited somewhere.
"I'll see if I can," he settled for. That way he could pretend to be busy if he decided it was a bad idea.
"Cool."
Everyone ran a final lap before gathering together in the middle. The coach was talking but Conan was focused on Owen and the way he lifted his shirt up to wipe his face, revealing a sliver of his chiseled abs.
Okay, maybe he wasn't so straight after all.