James had been doing a lot of collabs and spending a lot of time with his friends over the week or so that you had been staying with him, and though this meant that you saw them fairly often, you were still very quiet and shy around them. You hadn't quite gotten to the point where you felt comfortable with them. Alex had been showing up unannounced fairly often "just to hang out with James." You assumed that this must just be their dynamic, but you were wrong. Alex had been showing up in hopes that he might see you even if only for a moment. You would hang around while he was over and offer him coffee or tea, occasionally mustering up enough courage to insert yourself into the conversation and try to tell a funny anecdote or make a joke. You always regretted this immediately after speaking, replaying what you had said in your head over and over again and analyzing all the ways it may have seemed weird.
Alex kept suggesting to James that he should get you to join them in an Eboys video, secretly hoping that this might allow him to spend more time with you. He brought it up so often that James was getting annoyed and a little suspicious of why he wanted you in a video so badly. He was used to them jokingly putting his dad in a video or two, but they usually planned that themselves or asked only once or twice before leaving it be. But Alex had been bringing it up pretty much every day since he met you.
"Why do you keep bringing this up? She's not going to want to," James asked Alex. He had shown up unannounced again and was currently looking through James's fridge for a snack he wasn't offered.
"Well, how do you know if you won't ask her?" Alex replied. He could hear that James was getting frustrated with him, and though this was usually where he'd let it go, he had convinced himself that this was his only shot of really getting to know you enough to spend time with you without James.
"Because I've known her for literally my entire life? She's been my best friend since birth, and she has always hated attention." Alex settled on an apple and shut the fridge, turning back to James.
"Just ask her." Alex bit into the apple sending juice running down his hand and then his arm.
"Oh my god, fine. Just stop making a mess of my kitchen. Use a napkin for Christ's sake." Alex smirked, but when James turned around to go talk to you, that smirk turned into a genuine smile.
You woke up to James knocking on your door. You had been trying your hardest to fix your sleep schedule since your new job was starting soon, but no matter how hard you tried, you ended up sleeping til at least 1 pm every day.
"Y/n?" James cracked your door a little and called in. You struggled with the sheets that had tangled around you in your sleep, and you turned towards the door.
"Ya?" you asked, grogginess weakening your voice.
"Sorry to wake you. I just have a question."
"It's all good. What is it?"
"We were wondering, well really Alex was wondering if you wanted to be a part of a video for our Eboys channel." As soon as you heard Alex's name, you felt your heart skip a beat, waking you right up. You barely even thought about what you were being asked, having immediately latched onto the fact that Alex was inviting you to do something. All you could think about was what that could possibly mean. You wanted to think it meant something, but you thought he was probably just being friendly and including you.
"Alex? Alex was wondering? Why?"
"I don't know, but he won't stop bringing it up. I told him you wouldn't want to but-"
"No, no. I want to."
"You want to?"
"Yeah, yeah. I'll do it."
"Ok then," James closes the door and goes back to tell Alex.
You got out of bed and started getting ready for the day, even though it was already mostly over. The whole time, all you thought of was Alex and the fact that he had specifically invited you to do something with the group. However, as you were thinking about him, you started to realize what exactly you had signed up for. You started to get incredibly anxious just thinking about the idea of being in one of their youtube videos. They got so many views and had so many fans, so it's not like it wouldn't really be seen. You considered changing your mind, but you did want to spend time with Alex. You decided that you had to back out. As much as you wanted to spend the time with Alex, the idea of being in the public eye even for a moment terrified you.
You went out into the living area to tell James that you couldn't do the video; however, you didn't realize that Alex was also over. You saw the two of them sitting on the couch playing video games. It looked like FIFA, but you weren't sure. You didn't play a lot of video games. You sat down next to James, hoping that you'd be able to discretely back out of the video before he told anyone you'd said yes, but as soon as you sat down next to James, Alex noticed you.
"Hey, y/n," Alex greeted you, way too cheerfully for the middle of the afternoon. He seemed to be completely full of energy. "I heard that you're going to be a part of an Eboys video. It should be brilliant!"
"Oh, yeah. Brilliant," you said, putting a little too much fake excitement into your voice, making it sound awkward and forced. You wanted to act like nothing was wrong, though you were secretly pissed that he had found out. You wished James could've waited to tell him. Now your only options were to cancel and hurt his feelings or do this video and be put in the public eye. You felt trapped in this decision that you'd only made because of your crush on Alex. You wished you would've stopped to think about what you'd agreed to instead of just being consumed by your feelings for Alex.
"Well, I was gonna go get something to eat if either of you wanna join me," Alex offered, knowing that James had already eaten.
"Sure," you said. You hadn't eaten anything yet and, assuming that your brother would come along as well, you wanted to spend a little bit of time with Alex.
"I've already eaten, but you two have fun," James said. You felt your anxiety spike as this would be the first time that you were with Alex alone.
You and Alex went to a sandwich shop up the road. You sat across from each other at a two-person table, and you stared intently at your menu to avoid staring at him. When you snuck a glance up at him, you found that he was looking right at you. Your eyes locked, and you felt heat rise to your cheeks before you quickly looked back down at your menu.
Alex swore that they had the cheapest sodas and beers in the area, and while you weren't usually one to buy a drink with your meal, you couldn't pass up anything that seemed like it was saving money. Both of you ended up ordering sodas with your sandwiches, and you sipped on them while you waited for your food. Alex started talking and talking and talking to fill the silence. You were so nervous you pretty much only responded with giggles, smiles, and nods. You could see him looking more and more discouraged until your food got there.
As soon as the waiter left, Alex asked you, "What, do you not like me or something?"
"What?" you asked, shocked.
"Well, you just aren't saying anything, and it feels like you kinda just want me to stop talking. Do you like hate me or something?"
"What? No! No. I like you. I like you a lot," you tried to reassure him, but he didn't seem convinced.
"Then why aren't we friends? Like we never hang out just us, and I know almost nothing about you. I don't even have your phone number."
"I dunno. I guess I just didn't think you wanted to be friends with me. Like I'm just your friend's sister that hangs around sometimes. But we can hang out if you want to. I think I'd like that. If you want."
"Yeah, of course, I want to," Alex reached across the table and handed you his phone. "Here. Put your number in, and I can text you when I'm free."
You typed your phone number into the space on the new contact page and handed it back to Alex. He added the contact name, adding descriptors to remember which y/n it was, and saved it in his phone. You felt your phone buzz in your pocket.
"I just texted you, so now you have my number as well," Alex said. You looked at your phone screen to a text that said, It's Alex :)
You smiled. You had been worried that you wouldn't really see Alex once you found a place, but now you felt like you might actually see each other and be friends outside of your relationship with James. Possibly this could be the beginning of something more, something you thought about way more often than you wanted to admit even to yourself. You wanted to keep your feelings more hidden so that there would be less of a chance of embarrassment or rejection, but you couldn't help it. Your mind was constantly filled with thoughts of him, and now you might actually be able to get closer to him. It was very exciting, and you couldn't help but show it.
Alex saw you smile and hoped that it was because of him. He had also been worried that he wouldn't see you anymore after you moved out of James's place. He wouldn't really have a reason to randomly drop in if James wasn't there. He was mentally going through his schedule, trying to find a day to invite you over that wouldn't seem too soon and freak you out but he didn't know if he could wait very long to see you. He hoped that even if you didn't feel the same way as he did, though you did, he would be able to become close to you. Even if you didn't have feelings for you, you'd allow him to get to know you, because even just knowing you seemed like the most amazing gift in the world.
The two of you continued to talk throughout the meal and even stayed a good while after you'd finished eating. You make a conscious effort to speak more, though it wasn't as much of a problem now that you were assured that Alex really did want your company. You told him all about your new job and how excited you were to be able to actually apply what you had been studying for so long and you told him about a few of the apartments you had been looking at. He seemed so interested in everything you had to say; even though, it all seemed fairly boring and ordinary to you. It made you feel more comfortable talking to him and before long you were telling him stories from university and childhood, though you left out any of the more traumatic experiences.
After a while, you'd realized that you'd been telling stories and talking about yourself the majority of the time, something you almost never do but you had felt so comfortable with Alex that you hadn't been monitoring yourself or thinking about how you come across. As soon as you realized this, you stopped talking and apologized. You were absolutely mortified that you had done this and were sure that he thought you were rude and annoying now.
"What are you apologizing for? I loved hearing about you," Alex replied.
"Really? Are you sure? It's totally fine if you thought I was annoying. I would've," you said, looking down sheepishly. You wanted to look at him and see his pretty face, but you felt as though you would die on the spot if he made eye contact with you.
"I'm sure. I don't think you're annoying. I think you're great."
You blushed and looked up at him. He was staring intently at you, and it was safe to say that he'd likely been doing so the whole time. His stare gave you butterflies. Any sort of attention from him filled you with a nervous excitement like you had never felt before. Even though you usually hated any sort of attention, all you wanted was to have Alex's attention all of the time. You wanted to keep hanging out with him, but you realized that it'd already been a few hours. Instead, you would have to wait until the next time the both of you were free. Or, unfortunately, the filming of the Eboys video which you still were supposed to be a part of.
The both of you went back home, saying a slightly awkward goodbye before going their separate ways. Thankfully, James had given you a key to get back in, so you didn't have to call him to let you in again. When you got back to James's apartment, he was sitting on the couch scrolling through his phone.
"Well, you were gone for a while," James greeted you, not looking up from his phone.
"Yeah, we got some sandwiches. It was pretty good," you said. You hoped that James didn't know that you and Alex were becoming friends. Technically there was nothing wrong with it, but it felt like something you needed to hide. You just really didn't want to upset your twin.
James seemed a little suspicious, but he didn't ask any more questions. He could tell you were hiding something from him but wanted to respect your privacy. Instead, he started telling you all about the video he was currently working on. It was some exaggerated beef with a guy named after an avocado. You listened for a while but had very little to add as you didn't entirely understand Youtube, especially from the youtuber's side of things. You talked for a little while before you went back to your room to make sure you had everything ready for your first day of work tomorrow. As you were looking through your things for your day planner, you heard your laptop ping.
It was a notification for a new email. You opened up your email and saw that it was from a website you'd been using to look at apartments and people looking for roommates. There had been a listing for a new roommate that you had responded to from two girls that lived in an apartment only a few blocks away. Everything had seemed pretty nice for the price, and more importantly, you could move in very soon. You were filled with relief. You had been so worried that you wouldn't ever find a place, and now that you'd finally found one, all you had to worry about were the logistics of moving in. You were especially glad that the place was so close by which would hopefully make your move as well as your commute to work fairly easy. You replied immediately and began making plans to move into the empty bedroom.
As soon as you had everything figured out, you ran to tell James the good news. You found him in the kitchen looking through some take out menus for dinner. You almost knocked him right over. "James! James!"
"Jesus, y/n. Be careful," he laughed. "What's going on?"
"I've got plans to move into my new place!"
"Really? That's great!" He smiled, but it didn't reach his eyes. He was a little upset that you weren't going to be living with him anymore; even though, he knew it was only ever supposed to be a temporary living situation. He had gotten so used to you always being around, just like when the two of you were young, that he was really going to miss spending all day together. He didn't want to ruin your excitement, though, so he kept it to himself until you left the room and he texted his friends.
It was a massive paragraph of a text that he sent into his Eboys group chat. He tried not to make a habit of it, but he had to admit that he did send a lot of long vent texts in the group chat. So many that his friends thought nothing of it when they saw the notification on their screens. Alex saw it and immediately wanted to talk to you about it. He was worried that it meant he would see you less. Worried that you might cancel the video because you were too busy and that now he would have no reason to stop by when James wasn't living with you. Immediately, Alex texted you, Heard ur moving
Yeah, Did James tell you that?
He did...u gonna need help moving?
Yeah! That'd be great. Thanks :)
Just lmk when ur moving and I'll come over
You were so glad that he had offered. You probablywould've been fine moving with just James's help, but you always loved anexcuse to see Alex. You were already excited to be getting a place to live, butnow you were extra excited. You went back to getting ready for your first dayof work, feeling like you were ready for anything and feeling hopeful for yourpossible relationship with Alex.