Tears were pouring down his face. The man in front of her was broken, a shell of a human being. His wand was laying carelessly up on the bar.
"Oh, Lily, my Lily, it's all my fault." As soon as he said it, he sobbed even louder. The bar patrons were starting to stare at the two of them now.
She patted him on the shoulder, her eyes moistening. Her heart was breaking for him, a perfect stranger who had knocked her on her butt the moment she came in. Still, she cared that he was obviously distraught.
"Can you tell me your name?" she asked him gently.
He looked up at her and she wiped the tears from his face. He flinched a little at her touch. "Severus Snape."
She smiled at him. "It's going to be okay, Severus. Just tell me why you're so upset. Who's Lily?"
At the mention of her name, more tears came. He buried his face in his hands. She calmed him down the best she could, even wrapping her arms around him and holding him there for several minutes while he sobbed. Suddenly, he pulled back and seemed to gather himself together a little.
"A woman I love...well, loved. The Dark Lord killed her and her husband just a few hours ago."
She gasped in surprise. That was terrible. "I'm sorry. Is there anything I can do?"
"Not really. But thank you anyway."
She pressed her lips together. This guy was completely heartbroken. She frowned as he motioned for the barkeep. The young lady walked over and took an order for another firewhiskey. She brought it over to him a few minutes later. He tried to take a sip, but the glass was moved from his reach.
"I think you've had enough of this," she told him softly.
Severus protested. "How dare you! This only makes my-"
"Seventh one," she finished. "You're already plastered. I don't think you need anymore firewhiskey."
He tried to grab for it, but she purposely let it slip from her hands. He sneered at her.
"You did that on purpose!"
She shrugged her shoulders innocently. "Maybe I did, but it was for your own good."
Severus got up from his seat and staggered closer to her. He tripped and fell forward into her lap, knocking her off of her own stool and onto the floor again, him landing on top of her this time The impact seemed to sober him a little.
"I'm sorry," he muttered. "I'm not usually like this."
"I understand," she said. "I won't hold it against you." She looked into his eyes. She could see the grief inside of them, the pain that he was trying so desperately to drown out. She raised up and kissed him lightly on the cheek.
"What did you do that for?"
"I don't know. You looked like you needed me to."
"You don't want to fall in love with me. Trust me. It'll get you killed. Just look where it got Lily. She wasn't in love with me though, was she?"
She frowned. He wasn't making any sense. He rolled off onto the floor and sat up as he pulled something out of his pocket. He took her hand and placed the small object inside, then closed her hand and held it that way, his onyx eyes burning into her light green ones.
"Keep this. Let it be a reminder that if you ever find someone you love, don't let them go and make sure you tell them how you feel, because you never know what you've got until it's gone."
Severus got up from the bar and staggered out the door. She watched him until he was out of her sight, wondering where he was going and how he was going to get there, or if he would get there. She opened her hand. Lying there in her palm was the most beautiful thing she had ever seen, a sapphire.
Lucy opened her eyes slowly. The morning sun was streaming through her bedroom window, hitting her in the face. She smiled from the memory of the dream. It was getting easier and easier for her to remember because she had experienced the same one for many months now. It was always the the same, but that was because it had actually happened.
Lucy sat up in her bed and threw the covers off, basking in the rays of the warm sun. Severus Snape was on her mind again. She didn't even really know the man, but their encounter had stayed with her for ten years. She would never forget the sadness in his eyes or the pain that had been etched on his face. A part of her wanted to talk to him, to see him again just to see how he was doing now. But that was silly, wasn't it?
She got up and walked across the hall to the next room. Her friend and roommate was already out of bed. She planned on running the plan by her to see what she thought. She closed the door to her friend's room and continued on into the kitchen. Jo was sitting there reading the morning's edition of the Daily Prophet. A big smile ran across her face when Lucy walked into the room.
"Good morning, sunshine," she greeted her.
"Good morning," Lucy said. "Why are you grinning at me like that cheshire cat from Alice in Wonderland?"
The smile on her face never faltered. "Because I'm in a good mood for a change and I'm going on a date with Chad this evening when I get off work."
Her eyes widened. "Really?"
"Really!" Jo squealed. "I'm so nervous."
Lucy sat down in the chair across from her. "Well, you shouldn't be. He's going to love you."
"I'm still nervous. I just met him at that dinner party at the Recreation Center downtown. Him and his boss Adam Winston. You remember, right?"
How could she forget? It was the most boring night in the world. She smiled. "I'll never forget it. Chad with his dirty blonde hair and those penetrating eyes. The two of you are perfect for each other."
"Thanks, Lucy. You know I love you, right?"
"Yes, I know." She giggled. "I'm going to do something spontaneous too, Jo."
Her friend looked at her skeptically. She never did anything without a plan. "And what's that?"
"I am going to write Severus Snape a letter."
"What?" Jo's mouth fell open in shock. "You're joking!"
"No, Jo. I'm serious. I can't get him or that night out of my head. You didn't see how completely broken he was. I have to know how he's doing."
"That is completely insane. It's a guy you met in a bar."
"I can't help it. I have to do something. I dream about that night over and over again. It's going to drive me insane."
Jo shook her head. "He won't write you back. I think it's a bad idea. He's liable to turn you in to the Ministry of Magic or something for stalking."
"I don't care if he doesn't write me back. And the Ministry of Magic? Really? I'm not stalking him."
"You are in your dreams."
Lucy rolled her eyes. "Well, I don't care. At least I'll know I tried. I just wish I knew how to get a hold of him."
She frowned disapprovingly. "You're going to kill me, but he comes in the shop once in a blue moon to get supplies. He teaches potions at Hogwarts."
Lucy's eyes were wild. "All this time you knew this and you didn't tell me?"
"In my defense, you've never mentioned his name before," Jo reasoned. "But I recognize the name now that you said it and I've had a little time to think about it. You've never even told me anything about what happened that night. How was I supposed to know?"
Her features softened. "You weren't. I'm sorry. I just- I'm so-"
"Obsessed?"
"No. Taken would be a better word. I'm just so taken by him and his story. I want to know more about him." Lucy shrugged. "And who knows? Maybe we could become friends."
Jo got up from the table. "He's going to think you're crazy. It's been ten years. A normal person would have forgotten him by now."
"I don't care. I have a photographic memory. No matter how hard I try, I can't forget. You didn't see the shape he was in."
"You will be lucky if he doesn't turn you in for stalking."
She laughed. "Still don't care."
Jo shook her head. "Well, Lucy, I have to get to work. Let me know how that goes for you."
Lucy grinned. "You will be the first to know."
As Jo grabbed her purse and went out the door, Lucy hurried over to the desk in front of the window. She plopped down in her chair and pulled some parchment from one of the drawers. Dipping her quill in the ink, she touched it to the paper and began to write anxiously, thinking carefully about what she wanted to say. She didn't want to scare him away with the first letter and she wanted him desperately to write back. Of course, there were no guarantees.
She just prayed he would write back to her, that it wasn't all for nothing. She needed someone to talk to anyway, someone who didn't know her personally. That way she could tell him what she refused to tell anyone else, a secret she had carried with her for years now; the reason why she was at Madame Rosmerta's pub that night herself. It was the main reason she couldn't get him out of her head. Severus wasn't the only one that had a reason to feel guilty.