Ben takes in everything that Gunnar has said. This kid is too mature for his age, too smart. Ben makes his way over to the bathrooms and waits for her to come out. He'd wait a lifetime for just one chance with her. As he stands outside he can vaguely hear her talking to herself.
Sadie stands in the bathroom staring at her reflection. Her feelings are in overdrive as she is struggling to find her breath. Thankfully Gunnar was there to help subside some of the feelings, but as she stands in front of the mirror, it is taking all of her to bring her back to normal. As she walked away she looked back and saw Ben's look of concern. No one knew of the panic attacks and they increased after Will died. Summer has always been the barrier for her and more recently Gunnar has become the second person in her life to see this and want to help. This kid carries more on his shoulders than he needs to and that's why Sadie will work thirty jobs to give him anything he asks for. She continues to sit in the bathroom until she catches her breath.
"You are ok, you will be ok, you are better than ok," she says "You've got this Sadie."
She makes her way out of the bathroom and as the door closes behind her, she feels a hand grab her arm and pull her back. When she turns she sees Ben, her heart, her love staring down at her. A look she can't quite pinpoint. Before she can react, he leans in and gives her a kiss. As if all of reality fades away, she reaches up and wraps her arms around his neck. This kiss is more than she could have ever expected. One of his hands makes it way around her face and his attempts to pull her closer to deepen the kiss. This kiss is full of fireworks and heated exchange or pent up emotions. The taste of their lips is like heaven, and her smell of sweet vanilla invades his senses. Just as he steps closer to her reality sinks into Sadie's mind... He is married. He is married to her "friend". She pushes him away and before she can help it, the tears fall from her eyes. Ben tries to move closer to her, confused by her actions and without thinking Sadie's hand makes its way to his face, slapping him hard. As the pain sears through his skin, he realizes his mistake. She thinks he is in a happy marriage to her friend.
"I..I.. Sadie, I.." Ben says.
"No, You asshole!" Sadie screams. How could he do this to her? Was this a joke? That is all she can think of as she walks away from Ben. Ben stands in his tracks stunned at what just happened. Baffled at how a small wonderful moment is turned so horrible, he tries to think of a way to fix this, tell her about Brittany.
When Sadie gets home she immediately changes into her pajamas and climbs into bed. She can't believe what happened. Why did he do that? He is married, he chose Brittany! between the breakdown and Ben, Sadie falls into an exhausted sleep. As the next morning comes, she wakes up to the smell of sausage and buscuits. Gunnar. She makes her way to the kitchen island and takes a seat. Big breakfast for a big day, homecoming dance.
"Hey Momma, big evening huh?" Gunnar says optimistically. Hoping that the anxiety has passed. "It was nice of Ben to include dad."
"Yeah, it was pretty amazing all around," Sadie says while touching her lips. The feeling she had long awaited and in such a beautiful moment was tainted.
"Eat up, we have a lot to do today mom," gunnar says, shocking her out of her thoughts.
"I've set up an appointment at the barber for a haircut and shave of your choice." Sadie says with a smile.
"Really?! You aren't going to do that? Is that why you picked up the extra shift?" Gunnar says excitedly.
"Hush, tonight is a big deal. Don't worry about anything other than having a good time," Sadie says lovingly.
They finish eating breakfast and as Gunnar runs out the door to go to the barber, Sadie spends the day cleaning up and getting ready for tonight. Some friends and their family will come take pictures out by the barn on the farm next to their house. When Gunnar arrives he sits and tells Sadie all that he's done on his checklist to make sure he has everything. Barber, check. Restaurant verified reservations, check. Flowers for Victoria, check. Gunnar takes his time in getting ready wanting to make sure that he looks his best for the girl of his dreams. As he walks out and see's Sadie standing there with tears forming in her eyes, Gunnar can't help but feel proud of his mom.
"Son, you look so handsome," Sadie says.
"Mom, you aren't going to cry are you?" Gunnar says.
"Absolutely, prepare to be embarrassed!" Sadie says "It is part of the right of passage for parents and their kids."
Gunnar's friends start to show up and Gunnar is completely overtaken by Victoria who looks beautiful. Thankfully Summer arrived to help Sadie take pictures and keep her company. Until this moment Sadie had forgotten that she invited Ben and Brittany who were standing off to the side. Brittany is talking the ear off a few parents and Ben is staring Sadie down. Hudson and Everett are hanging out with Victoria and Gunnar having their own conversation going on. Everett is taking pictures and looks very professional as she is looking at different angles.
"Alright everyone outside by the barn to take pictures!" Sadie says guiding everyone out of the house. As everyone filters out of the house, Ben finally has enough courage to approach Sadie.
"Sadie, can we talk? Please!" he begs.
"No." Sadie responds. Afraid of what will happen and not trusting herself in listening.
"Sadie, please let me explain!" He begs again.
"No, I need to talk to Gunnar. Ben stay far away from me!" She says sternly.
Sadie quickly walks away towards the kid that holds the world. She puts a fake smile on her face and approaches the crowd of kids. As Gunnar turns he has the biggest smile on his face.
"Mom, thank you for today!" he says.
"Absolutely! I have a little surprise for you," she says. "I want tonight to be special, so here.."
She holds her hands out to Gunnar who reaches for hers. She drops a pair of keys in his hand.
"Mom, you don't mean. I can take dad's car?" Gunnar sasy shocked.
"I want tonight to be special for you." She says proudly. " You are responsible and mature for your age. Have fun, but not too much fun."
"The mustang, Sadie, you kept it?" Ben says. Sadie jumps at his close proximity to her.
"Of course I kept it, it's Gunnar's now. You know the rules and I expect you to take care of this like dad did." Sadie says sweetly to Gunnar.
The look in his eyes is filled with pride. "Mom, I can't even believe this. I love you so much" Gunnar says.
"I love you too, now go have fun and be safe. Home at 2 am." Sadie says.
"Yes ma'am!" Gunnar responds.
With that they are off for his homecoming dance. As he drives away in his dad's car, Sadie can't help but feel lost. What will happen when he goes to college in a couple years. She won't know what to do with herself.
All of the parents pack up and head out and with the kids gone, Sadie walks back into her house and the lonely feeling pulls at her. Summer left to go on her date with Charlie and although she is happy for her best friend to finally have a good genuine person, she feels so envious of the fact she is free to have that. No chains to hold her back. I put together a sandwich and chips and get ready to settle in for a movie when she hears the doorbell ring. As she opens the door she feels her heart drop. The man who invades her mind and soul stands before her.
"What the hell do you want?" She says trying to cover the pain in her voice.
"I NEED to talk to you about yesterday. Please Sadie," Ben pleads.
As she takes a deep breath she stands to the side and motions him to walk in the door. As he passes she is looking around for a place to run. She thinks of how quickly it would take to get to her closet and hide. "You have 10 minutes Ben." Sadie states sternly. Not trusting herself to be alone with him any longer than she can be.
" Brittany and I are getting a divorce" Ben quickly states. It is the one statement that he had to get out before she shut him down completely.
"BEN STOP! NO!" She yells.
"Just listen, DAMN IT WOMAN!" he yells back.
Taken back with his tone towards her, she closes her mouth to let him talk.
"Sorry for yelling, but truth," Ben says apologetically, "Brittany and I were never happy. It was all a show. She made me believe or convinced me that she could make me love her and I tried, god help me, I tried! I just couldn't make myself love her, when my heart has always belonged somewhere else, with someone else."
Sadie stands back against the counter in the kitchen baffled by this admission. Why would he come here and tell her all this.
"She has been seeing someone else for the past 4 years. Charlie's brother, his name is Justin. Brittany and him have been seeing each other all this time. I moved out of our bedroom and into the guest bedroom for the past 5 years. I just couldn't take being fake and lying about our situation any more. In public was one thing, I couldn't do it any longer at home." Ben continues on "We talked last week and i am moving out. Starting the process of divorce. She is helping me find a new place.
All of this is too much and Sadie closes her eyes trying to find a stable place to let her catch her breath.
"Sadie, I have to tell you. I love you! I've loved you since high school and when you chose Will over me, it broke me, but I couldn't stop loving you!"
What? What did she just hear?
"What? What did you just say?" Sadie says
"I love you, I have always had and always will. No matter what," Ben says
"You have loved me since high school?!" Sadie asks. She was lied to all these years. So many years she never felt good enough for this man who stands in front of her.
"Yes.. and.." Ben says but he is all out of words.
Not knowing how else to say it, he reaches out and grabs her, crashing his lips into hers. This kiss is even better than before, taking the breath from both of their bodies. Ben feels elated that she doesn't pull back or run away. She pulls him closer, taking every ounce of breath from him and he would happily give it. The sharp ringing of her phone pulls them out of their paradise and Sadie quickly takes it seeing her coworkers name appear. Why is Alice calling? Alice is working tonight. When she answers, her heart once again drops. Panic fills her chest and her face goes pale.
"Gunnar was in a car accident, I have to go!" she says with such panic.
"What happened?" Ben says.
"I don't know, I didn't ask. She just said he was in an accident and was being taken to St. Thomas Hospital. Ben is where they take trauma patients." Sadie responds.
"He will be ok, come on i'll drive. I'll make some calls on the way." Ben says reassuringly.
He takes her hand and leads her to his truck where they take off to the hospital. Ben holds Sadie's hand the entire drive and Sadie's mind is only thinking of Gunnar.