"What do you mean?" Ashley inquired, feeling utterly confused.
"Grant left because his family was having financial problems and well, his mother is sick...really sick. Yeah, his dad did in fact take a job out of Valley Glen but those were the other reasons." Grant explained to Ashley, wishing that Grant would have told her instead of himself. He hated having to do this because he knew it would hurt Ashley.
"W-why couldn't he tell me himself?" Ashley stuttered into the phone, more confused and concerned then she has ever been.
Confused because Grant didn't tell her.
Concerned because she wanted to know if Grant was OK, and how his mother was doing.
"He didn't want to tell you because he didn't want you to worry about him. He knew you would always be concerned for him and his family. He didn't want to do that to you."
"Why didn't you tell me seeing how he wouldn't?" Ashley spat.
"It wasn't my place to tell you and I'm sorry. I've just seen how upset you've been lately. I figured you would understand more if you knew why." Griffin spoke soothingly into the phone, trying to not hurt Ashley even more then she already was.
"I need to call him." Ashley blurted out and quickly hung up, leaving Griffin to apologize into the dead phone line.
Ricky and Amy finally back at school:
"John was great when I dropped him off at the nursery today." Amy filled Ricky in on John's drop-off at the nursery and his night. "He totally crashed when we went home though. Oh, and the weirdest thing happened. My parents called to say good-night and check up on us but it didn't seem like they were at Mimzy's."
Ricky smirked and then grabbed Amy's book bag from her arms as she struggled to grab her history books. They walked down the hall and soon they were standing outside of Amy's first class.
"See you at lunch!" Ricky yelled over his shoulder, not evening bothering to ask if she was going because he knew she'd be there.
She always was.
Not just be there for lunch... she was always there for him.
He loved that.
Lunch.
That one time of day most students look forward to.
"Hey." Ricky smiled as he sat down on at the picnic table beside Amy. She smiled in return and stole a peck on the lips.
"Hey to you, too." Amy laughed and continued to flip through the chemistry book in front of her.
"So how was class?" Ricky asked, trying to fill the silence.
Amy rolled her eyes and put away the book, knowing Ricky didn't want to concentrate on school. "Summer's in a few days but I hate cramming for my final exams."
"Thank god for Summer." Ricky sighed.
Ricky used to love school, in fact, it was his favourite thing to do. His favourite place to be. He would be away from his sexually abusive drunk of a father and away from his abused, drug addict of a mother. This place was calm, fun, and you had no reason to be scared. But once Ricky was taken out of his home, and moved onto better things and better places along with amazing people; school wasn't his favourite thing anymore. It wasn't so much of a hideout anymore but a place he was supposed to go. Though he always accepted it.
But now, he knew that when he went home, he had to work and see John and Amy.
So school was a burden.
"I've been waiting for Summer for sooooooooo long." Amy slurred, putting her head on her arms; letting the sun soak into her back.
Ricky felt his phone vibrate in his pocket, then let out a loud tune. He groaned.
"Hello?"
"Ricky?"
"Yeah?" Ricky raised an eyebrow and then looked at the number on his caller I.D. Protected.
"Yes. It's the nursery calling. We tried calling Amy but her phone seems to be off. Well, we are actually closing early today due to a small mix up in shifts. So we're asking for parents or guardians pick up their children at three o'clock today instead of usual pick up time. Is that alright?"
"Yeah sure." Ricky agreed, then realizing he doesn't get off school till three thirty. He could probably just skip.
"Thanks. Have a nice day." Then she hung up.
"Who was that?" Amy voice was muffled, seeing as her head was still in her arms.
"The nursery. They need us to pick John up at three today." Ricky explained, then began rubbing small circles on Amy's back. She let out a soft moan, followed by a shiver then went down her spine.
As they both began to slowly drift off into their own world, Ricky decided we would go and grab something to eat from the cafeteria.
"Be right back." Ricky stood and left Amy sitting alone. She shrugged and closed her eyes.
"Amy?" A familiar, soft, velvet voice asked. She lifted her head and fixed her hair.
"Hey, Ben."
"How have you been?" He awkwardly stood there.
Amy raised an eyebrow, absolutely baffled as to why Ben would decide to come and talk to her seeing as he hasn't for quite some time.
Ben actually decided to come and talk to Amy because he wasn't sure of his feelings for her. So maybe if he could be friends with her or just hang out, he could be more clear and sure about them.
"I've been great actually. Yourself?" Amy answered, feeling a sense of awkwardness.
"Great."
Amy just nodded. "Umm, do you want to sit down?"
"Sure." Ben accepted, sitting down and making himself comfortable.
"So how's John?" Ben inquired while handing Amy half of his sandwich when he noticed her lack of food. Her smiled with absolutely dazzling and Ben's heart raced.
Amy smiled with gratitude and grabbed half the sandwich. "He's good. And thank-you."
Ben flashed his teeth wildly and took a bite. They sat for a few minutes in comfortable silence.
"Listen Amy, I really want us to be friends and I noticed we haven't even though we've already talked about... us... and I think we should be great friends. I still want to see John and yourself and still maintain a friendship with Ricky." Amy looked up at Ben through her lashes. "I just miss you Amy. Oh and of course John, too."
Amy blushed and wasn't sure what she could say. So she said what she was thinking. "I'd like that Ben. And I miss you too."
Suddenly, Ben's eyes went elsewhere then he gathered all of his things and stood. "Well I better go find Grace. Bye!"
Then he ran away.
Fast.
Amy turned around to find Ricky walking towards her at a fast pace, his face had many emotions but mostly he seemed bewildered and angry.
"Why were you flirting with Ben?" Ricky questioned as he set down his tray of processed food.
"I wasn't flirting with him.... I was talking."
"It sure looked like flirting to me."
"It wasn't."
"Fine."
Then they both sat in awkward silence.
As the day progressed, Ricky's attitude changed. He was more annoyed then anything. He tried to calm himself down but seeing Amy blushing and absentmindedly playing with her while talking to Ben, was still stuck in his mind. It's not that he hated Ben because he didn't. He'd classify him as a friend but Ricky always knew there would be feelings between Amy and Ben. It was a given. Ben was there for her in probably one of the hardest things in her life while he wasn't. He tried to be but he felt like it was more or less Ben's place to be comforting her when she was pregnant. It hurt him that he couldn't though.
He always regretted it to this day.
He wished he could have been there for her like he is there for her now. He would give anything. Now he knew he would just try extra hard to make her happy and lo-cherish her.
"Hi." Amy greeted Ricky as he walked towards his car at 3 o'clock.
"Hey." Ricky forced a smile though all he wanted to do was question her feelings for Ben.
Oh god. I'm turning into that jealous boyfriend type. Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck. Ricky thought.
They pulled up into the nursery and went inside, both excited to see John again.
"Hey, baby." Amy cooed while holding John in her arms, giving him a long hug. "I missed you." Amy sighed while kissing the top of his head. "Look, its daddy!" Amy pointed to Ricky.
John smiled and stretched out his arms, wanting his daddy. "Hey John." Ricky smiled and kissed his sons head.
"Thanks for letting us know." Amy thanked as they walked out.
The day care ladies noticed something off today.
Ricky and Amy obviously had something going on between them. They were tense and that tension didn't go unnoticed.
Ricky usually had his arm around Amy's waist and gave her a quick, peck on the lips.
Today was different.
They weren't even holding hands.
Ashley held the device in her hands, letting her finger tips dance over the screen, contemplating to call his cell-phone or not. She had been standing there for awhile and she needed to speak to him.
She's needed to speak with him since he left. But would he answer her calls all of a sudden after they only spoke once since he left?
It was worth a shot.
Ashley dialled the familiar number and put her phone against her ear, letting the rings echo through her ear drum. She waited.
And waited.
And waited.
Seven rings later and two ALMOST hang ups, Grant's voice was on the other line.
"Ash?"
"Hi." Ashley answered.
"I miss you." Grant whispered, his voice dry and raw.
"I've missed you too. Words cannot describe but now isn't the time for this. Why haven't you been calling me or answering my calls. Better yet, why didn't you tell me the real reason why you moved?"
As she awaited his answer, Grant sucked in a deep breath; unsure what to say.
"I'm waiting." Ashley announced, still hurt by his lack of honesty. She began to think he had hung up on her but then she heard him sigh.
"I care way too much about you, Ashley. When my mom became sick-which was actually quite some time ago-I was hurt. I was numb. Nothing. But as I began seeing you, I was better. Then, my mom was told she had over-came her cancer. So I was better and I had no reason to really say anything because, well, I don't really have a reason why I didn't tell you. But then she got sick again. It came back but I did my best to hide it... I really did. I was going to tell you again but then you started talking about taking the next step forward in our relationship and you seemed so happy. I didn't want to ruin that by making you worry about my family all the time. Then, we started having a bit of financial problems but that didn't matter as much as my mom did. So my father got a job near a great hospital that is willing to help my mom. The hospital is great here and it will be great for her. Us. Ashley, please understand how much I love you. With all my heart. I promise I'll come back. I just didn't tell you because I didn't want you to worry about me. I won't be gone long. I really have to go but I love you and I'll call you tomorrow. Bye."
And after all the words were finished flowing out of his mouth, his sat on the bed and cried.
He cried for his mother and her illness.
He cried because he missed Ashley.
He cried because he hurt Ashley by lying to her.
He cried because he hasn't cried in awhile...
After she finished listening to the words flow out of his mouth and she processed them all, she sat on her floor, her back against the bed, and cried.
She cried for Grant's mother.
She cried because she missed Grant.
She cried because he lied to her.
She cried because... she just needed to cry.
She also cried because she never got to say she loves him back.
Ricky and Amy showed up at the school again to grab their homework that was in their lockers and a few forms that the band was given today.
"Do you want me to wait in here with John while you grab it?" Ricky asked as Amy unbuckled her seat-belt.
Amy gazed over at the school and she heard the high pitched ringing of the school bell outside. "Well, we can bring John inside. School's done now. We'll be quick too." Amy suggested.
"Alright." Ricky got out of the car and held John in his arms. This would be the first time they brought John inside the school for everyone to see him.
"Let's go." Amy smiled and reached for Ricky's free hand. He forced a smile back but became distracted when he saw Ben's gaze on the couple and John. He felt a growl in his chest and he put his arm around Amy's waist instead.
Wow. I just went all cave-man on her. Ricky thought as he shot daggers towards Ben but relaxed as Grace came up behind him and he gave her a deep kiss.
They both walked into the school, hearing the whispers and the 'awwwwwws' from people and continued on to their lockers. Everyone was starring but they didn't care.
They were proud of John.
They didn't regret it. He wasn't a mistake. He's their beautiful, wonderful son.
Why not show him off?
Soon enough they were out of the school and walking back towards their car.
"WOW! He's gotten so big now. He's just so adorable." Grace cooed as her and Ben walked in front of Ricky and Amy hand in hand.
"He sure is." Amy smiled as she admired her son. Ricky smiled too but he couldn't help but notice Ben wasn't smiling at John; he was smiling at Amy. Ricky coughed and Ben's eyes automatically went back to Grace. Ricky smirked with satisfaction and then shrugged.
Why am I so jealous? I've never been like this before with a girl. Oh right. That's because Amy's different... real. Ricky thought.
He turned his attention back to Ben and noticed he was starring at Grace with admiration. Was Ben's affection today towards Amy really true or what is just in my head? Was I over-reacting and seeing things that weren't really there? Ricky questioned himself.
"Well, we better get going. Bye Ben. Bye Grace." Amy waved off and pulled Ricky along. Ricky just nodded towards the other couple and continued inside the school.
Soon enough, they were walking out of the school with the forms for band.
"So what do they say?" Ricky inquired. He would look at his own but he was driving.
"For the last day of school, they want the band to put on a small show. Nothing major really." Amy explained.
"I might not get mine signed." Ricky sighed and continued driving.
"Why not?" Amy raised an eyebrow.
"Because exams are killing me. Plus, I've been skipping practice for work lately so yeah."
"Oh."
The rest of the ride home was silent and Amy couldn't help but notice Ricky's attitude change today. "Is there something wrong?" Amy turned to look at Ricky.
"No." Ricky spat.
"Yes there is. You've been acting... stand-offish... since lunch."
Ricky sighed and shook his head. "I just, haven't been feeling well I guess." He lied. He wish he didn't lie to her. He hated doing that. Ricky just felt stupid for feeling so jealous. He had never felt so jealous before.
"Well if you don't feel like coming over it's OK. You can go home and rest or something." Amy suggested, though she was crossing her fingers in hopes of him saying that he would still go over to her house.
"No. I'll come over for awhile. Will your parents will be back tomorrow or the day after that?" Ricky asked as he turned the corner to Amy's street.
"The day after."
"Oh."
"Oh?" Amy raised an eyebrow.
"Just curious."
After feeding John and getting him ready for bed, Ricky sat down beside Amy on the couch. He wrapped his arm around her shoulders and held her close, obviously feeling bad about how he was acting today. Amy felt better because she felt close to him again. But she could tell something was bothering him.
But she wasn't going to ask because she needed him to tell her himself. She didn't want to pry it out of him. As Amy thought about it, Ricky seemed to hold off on the affection lately. Sure he would tell her how much he adores her and appreciates and likes her, but never did he mention the word love. He never really expressed where his emotions and feelings were. Where he thought they should be in their relationship. The suspense was driving Amy crazy. She needed to know if he loved her like she loved him.
She needed to know so maybe a small amount of affection would let her know where they stood.
"Ricky, I'm so glad I have you." Amy whispered against his chest. She kissed his torso, earning a small moan from Ricky.
"Me too."
That was all he said and Amy was hoping for a better answer.
"I couldn't ask for a better father for John." Amy kissed Ricky's jaw, causing Ricky's breathing to hitch.
"John couldn't have a better mother. You're perfect." Ricky gasped when he felt her lips brush against his. Amy smiled against his cheek then lightly kissed it.
"I better get to bed and you better get going." Amy shrugged as she pulled herself up. She still wanted Ricky to tell her what was bothering him.
"Good night, Amy." Ricky whispered as his light caressed her cheek with his finger tips.
"Good night, Ricky." Amy breathed. Ricky grabbed her palm and kissed it lightly. He looked up at her through his lashes and smirked. Amy melted.
With that, he walked out the door.
Amy stood there in the doorway, wishing that she was told how she was loved.
Because she loved him.
She just couldn't say it.
Not yet. Not until she knows he loves her.
She can't be hurt again.
Ben was driving home from Grace's house after supper with her family-which oddly isn't awkward- and a great make-out session with Grace in her room afterwards. He really, really likes Grace. She's amazing and funny. Totally down to earth and generous.
What else could he want?
Oh yeah. That's right. He wants to sort out what he still feels for Amy.
Even though he has said good-bye to her already in the "we're still friends and I'll still love you.. Just not that way" sense, he still couldn't let her go. He still felt strongly about her and he couldn't move forward with Grace and give her everything she deserves until he knows exactly how he feels about Amy.
He needs to know.
When he pulled back into his beautiful home, he stayed in his car. He pulled out his cell-phone and dialled the same number he used to call twenty times a day.
Her number.
After a few rings, he was convinced she went to bed. Before he could hang up, her melodic voice came on.
"Hello?"
"Hi Amy. It's Ben."
"I know it's you Ben. Caller I.D." Amy laughed and Ben couldn't help but join in.
"Well, I was calling to ask if you wanted to go out for coffee with me tomorrow?" Amy's breathing stopped for a second. "Just as friends of course!" Ben added on.
Amy stood in her kitchen in silence and shock. She hadn't hung out or really talked to Ben since their "good-bye" and she wasn't sure it was good. But then again, they were just friends. She loves Ricky.
So no harm in going out with a friend who happens to be the guy you used to love and always will, just not like Ricky.
It couldn't change anything.
It wouldn't make Ricky jealous or upset. Right?