Sakin
From: rsmendrez@gmail.com
Good day.
Please be informed that our class will push through today despite the occurrence of the Intramurals. I know it's just the second day of the big event but we roughly can't afford to miss another schedule. We just have the exact number of meetings that are merely enough to conduct the experiments that must be completed.
See you in the lab. Have a good day.
"Hayop," I heard one of my classmates murmuring.
Umangat doon ang tingin ko at nakitang nakababa rin ang mata niya sa cellphone. Marahil kakabasa lang din ng email mula kay Mr. Mendrez.
Pangalawang araw na ng Intrams ngayon at tulad kahapon ay iilan pa lang kaming nandito sa classroom. Most of our classmates probably plan to just go to school when it's time for the 'highlight' of the day already. And that 'highlight' pertains to none other than the afternoon shows, of course.
Pangatlong subject pa naman namin ang Chemistry kaya't may panahon pang humabol ang iba. At tulad nga ng inaasahan ay unti-unti na rin silang nagsidatingan. Bakas sa kanila ang pagmamadali habang ang iba ay halatang naabala pa ang pagtulog at kakagising lang. Halos magdabog pa yung iba habang napasok sa silid.
"May mga pa-epal talagang teacher minsan," reklamo ng isa.
"Nupa. Panira si Sir," pag sang-ayon pa ng kaibigan niya.
Kahit si Sky na dumiretso sa practice room nila kanina ay bumalik ngayon sa classroom marahil matapos niya ring mabasa ang mensahe ni Sir. Winaksi ko rin naman agad ang tingin sa kanya at iniwas ang mata.
Nang mag-alas diyes ay nagtungo na kaming lahat sa laboratory. Habang papunta roon ay saka lang nag-sink in sakin na magka-partner nga pala kami ni Sky roon. Hindi pa man nagsisimula ay parang gusto ko na agad matapos.
Pinaalala lang ng guro ang mga karaniwang tagubilin bago niya kami hinayaang magsimula. Kusang naging malamig ang pakikitungo ko kay Sky. Hindi ko naman sana intensyong gawin yun pero sadyang ganon na lang ang naging kilos ko.
I can't deny that I was clearly being stubborn and somehow even bitchy towards him while we're accomplishing the exercise. May pagkakataon na maayos siyang nagtatanong tungkol sa ginagawa namin pero hindi ako sumasagot. Kapag may kinukumpuni siya ay hindi na rin ako tumutulong dahil ayokong lumapit sa kanya. A part of me is starting to feel guilty but I hard-headedly chose to dismiss the tiny sense of remorse.
Isang beses ay mukhang may hinahanap siya at saka humarap sa akin.
"Do you know where the pH meter is?" he warily asked.
Hindi ko siya sinagot at bagkus ay humarap ako kay Sir Mendrez na nagmomonitor sa katabing table namin.
"Sir," tawag ko sa atensyon niya. "Where can we get the pH meter po?"
"Part five na kayo?" the teacher asked first.
I wasn't sure so I kept mum but Sky nodded.
"Alright, get it from the supply room. You have to leave them your ID before they lend it to you," Sir Mendrez instructed.
I had no choice but to go with Sky so we could get what we need. Naabutan namin doon ang medyo may katandaan na bantay.
"Excuse me po.." I shyly said in a small voice.
Umangat ang tingin niya at inayos ang salamin.
"H-hihiram lang po sana kami ng pH meter," I softly stated.
Tumango siya at naglahad ng kamay. "IDs,"
Pinasulat niya rin kami sa logbook sa lamesa.
"Pakihintay na lang. Kukunin ko muna," paalam niya bago tumalikod at iniwan kami roon. May pinasukan siyang isa pang silid kung saan sinara niya rin ang pinto.
I was left in that small space with Sky. Uneasily shifting on my feet. Sinandal ko na lang ang katawan sa wooden divider sa likod namin para makalma ang sarili.
"Yara.."
His sudden mention of my name gave me chills. My breathing gradually glicthed. The mellowness of his voice left me still and motionless in my position.
"I'm.. sorry," he might be sounding unsure but the sincerity of his words was clear.
Ang katapatan at sinseridad ng boses niya ay nakakadala ngunit pinilit kong patatagin ang loob. I clenched my fist as I internally roll my eyes.
"Ba't ka nagso-sorry?" I scoffed.
He breathed in heavily. "For whatever I did that make you upset,"
I sarcastically smirked. "Bakit? Ano bang ginawa mo?"
"I.. don't know either," he honestly whispered that almost caused my lips to part. "But it might have been something terrible for you to feel that way." agad na bawi niya.
He looked straight into me. His eyes were shining with anguish and distress. Despite that, he was able to brush those away just so he could warmly gaze at me.
"No matter what it is.. I genuinely apologize, Yara." ang pagod na mga mata niya ay kumurap nang marahan. "It's no one's fault but mine for making you feel like that. Be it unconsciously or not," the sense of sorrow in his delicate voice nearly got me swayed.
He was looking at me with so much intensity. His eyes blinked tenderly.
"I never want you getting hurt, Yara.." bakas ang pagsusumamo sa boses niya. "I'm.. sorry if I didn't even realize that I was already failing miserably in that aspect," mahinang sabi niya kasabay ng pagpungay ng kanyang mga mata.
Unti-unting sumikip ang dibdib ko. Iniwas ko ang tingin habang pinipilit lunukin ang masakit na nakabara sa lalamunan.
"That.. won't change anything, Sky." I said with my shaking voice. "Itatago mo pa rin naman ang tungkol sa atin. You'd still be ashamed of me-"
"What?" he cut me off in puzzlement. His forehead creased in bewilderment. "Yara, I am never ashamed of you. Why would I even be?" he absurdly remarked with firmness.
"Then why, Sky?" I can't help but snap.
He looks taken aback for a while. Lumambot ang mga mata niya.
He sighed. "I told you.. I have my reasons-"
"Reasons," I faintly chuckled without humor. "Like what, Sky? Perhaps you have someone special who should never know that you are already engaged?" I sneered.
"What?" agad na lumukot ang mukha niya. "Where are you getting your ideas, Yara Isabelle?!" he asserted in an appalled tone.
Umiwas ako ng tingin.
"Then what, Sky? Don't tell me your management is forbidding you in getting involve to someone?" I mocked. What is this? Some kind of a cliche teleserye? It doesn't even make sense. They've just been freshly scouted.
I stole a glance at him. Bagsak ang tila hindi makapaniwala at pagod na ekspresyon niya.
"That's how low you think of me?" a little hint of resentment was evident in his voice. "I can easily turn my back on that measly career if that was the case, Yara." he said with conviction.
Bahagyang napaawang ang labi ko. Hindi na napigilang bumaling sa kanya ng nanghihinang ulo ko.
Unti-unti akong napalunok.
"Then.. why, Sky?" dahan-dahang tanong ko.
Matagal siyang tumitig sakin. Ngunit kalauna'y umiwas din ng tingin. Napayuko pa siya na tila nahihirapan. I also saw his adam's apple moving a multiple times.
Umikot ang mga mata ko.
"Kung ayaw mong sabihin, hindi naman kita pinipilit," saad ko nang may bahid ng hinanakit.
Pasimple ko pa ulit siyang sinilip at mas bakas na ang paghihirap sa kanya ngayon.
Ilang saglit pa siyang tila nag-iisip kung sasabihin niya ba sakin o hindi hanggang sa narinig ko ang pagpapakawala niya ng malalim na buntong-hininga.
"Your... Dad asked me to keep it private," mahinang wika niya. He muffled it in such a small voice that it was almost inaudible for me.
Nang maproseso ang sinabi niya ay saka lang ito rumehistro sakin. Unti-unting napaawang ang bibig ko.
His cheeks were slightly flushing with a shade of crimson while I was blinking repeatedly until I recover.
"W-what?" I asked while still baffled. "Pinagbawalan ka ni Daddy na.. ibunyag ang tungkol sa atin?"
His adam's apple edgily moved. Hindi siya makatingin sakin.
"Kung alam mo lang," bulong niya. "Ang dami pa ngang bawal..."
Hindi ko nakuha ang sinabi niya. Tatanungin ko pa lang sana ulit siya tungkol doon ngunit lumabas na ang nag-aassist samin dala ang hinihiram na materyales.
Bumalik kami sa laboratoryo na litong-lito pa rin ako. Habang siya naman ay panay ang iwas ng tingin sakin. Halos wala na akong dulot sa kabuuan ng aktibidad dahil lumulutang ang isipan ko.
Nang magliligpit na ay pinilig ko ang ulo at pinilit na makatulong kahit dito man lang. Patapos na kami nang biglang lumapit si River.
"Isabelle, lunch." he lazily demanded.
"H-huh?" my gaze unconsciously flew to Sky who was serious on what he's doing. "A-ah wait,"
Hindi na kami nilubayan ni River at talagang nag-abang sa pagtatapos ng gawain.
"Tara na, okay na yan." aniya nang makitang naibalik ang huling piraso.
Lumapit ako sa bag at mga gamit ko para ihanda iyon.
"Yara,"
I stiffened when I heard Sky's voice. My gaze turned to his stern expression. Nasa tapat ko na rin siya ngayon. Dalawa na sila ni River na nasa harap ko.
"Kukunin pa natin ang ID natin," propesyonal na wika niya.
Umayos ng tindig si River bago nagsalubong ang kilay kay Sky.
"Wag mo nga siyang manduhan," paasik na sabi niya at halos malaglag ang panga ko. "Who do you think you are to tell her what to do?" hamon pa nito.
Sky sluggishly turned his eyes on him. He gazed at him sharply. I almost stopped breathing when he clenched his jaw.
"I'm her.." nilipat niya ang tingin sa akin.
Bigla akong kinabahan sa kung anong maaari niyang sabihin.
"..partner," he sturdily added while looking deeply into my soul.
River insultingly scoffed.
"Pwede niya namang kunin yun pagkatapos naming kumain." bumaling pa siya sakin. "I'll get it with you, Isabelle."
Lumipat ang tingin ko kay Sky. Nakaabang sa akin ang mga mata niya. His eyes were hopeful. And even earnest.
It's making my knees feel weak. Gusto kong sumama. Gusto kong sumama kay Sky. Pero wala akong kumpiyansa na kaya ko na ulit mapag-isa kasama siya matapos ng mga bago kong nalaman. Tingin ko'y kailangan ko rin munang iproseso ang lahat.
"U-uhm," I cleared my throat. "M-mamaya ko na lang kukunin yung sakin, S-sky."
Tila may gumuhong kung ano sa kanya. I witnessed how sadness and pain slowly crawled into his eyes. It almost made me want to take back what I just said.
"See?" River arrogantly butted in. "Gusto niyang kumain kasama 'ko. Back off, Dude." halos gusto ko na lang takpan ang bibig ni River. I've never been this eager on wanting someone to just shut up.
Nagtagal pa sakin ang malamlam na mga mata ni Sky. Para akong tinutunaw ng mga iyon.
Kalaunan ay bumaling siya sa nakaabang na mukha ni River. His soft eyes turned hard as he faced River's egotistical expression. He subtly gritted his jaw too.
Pasimple niyang pinasadahan nang mayabang na tingin si River mula ulo hanggang paa bago bahagyang kumurba ang labi niya.
Umisang hakbang pa siya palapit dito bago magsalita.
"Ayos lang," I shivered at his voice. "Sakin pa rin naman uuwi 'yan mamaya,"