JAE ▪︎ POV
"Oh my god, did you get into a fight, what the hell happened to your hands?!"
Ezra blinked at me from where he finally stood in my door way. His confused, green eyes flickered down at his bruised knuckles and then back up at my face again. "Not a fight. Just a punching bag-"
"And you didn't think to wrap them in ice?" I cut him off with the disgusted look of a mother scolding her child. I gripped his shirt and dragged him across the threshold and into my humble apartment so I could do something about those bruises. Well I didn't literally drag him since he was too big to be dragged. He helpfully walked with me into my entry way.
"I'm fine Jae," Ezra spoke confidently with an amused grin at my embarrassingly caring behaviour towards his injuries. He pushed me back gently with a wink when I bent to untie his shoe laces.
"Fine," I held up my hands, backing away from him in surrender. I was overreacting... a lot, but, that was just who I was... I got got the trait from my mother - sue me.
Since the opportunity presented itself, I took the time to subtly let my eyes scan Ezra up and down as he removed his running shoes.
Damn. His back muscles flexed underneath a tight, grey shirt, his thick legs contained in black sweatpants. This was the first time I'd seen him dressed down and the casual sex appeal made my stomach clench. Ezra's dark brown hair was a loosely curled mess now that it was missing his usual gelled back style. It was cute and I clenched my fists, resisting the urge to reach out and run my fingers through the longer, soft looking strands on the top of his head.
When he finally stood up, I could take in his face. As classically handsome as always, even with the noticeable, dark crescents beneath his gorgeous green eyes. His jaw was slightly furred with stubble and well... it was distracting. How would it feel against my cheek when I kissed him?
"Corn cheese!"
I blurted the words, turning quickly and walking away from him towards the kitchen. Wow. What an idiot Jae, well done. I crossed my eyes in a silent fit of 'what the fuck' all the way into my small, but convenient kitchen where I'd already prepared two bowls of corn cheese - yes, another bowl for me.
I was a big foodie and unapologetically so. You only live once! Eat as much as you can while you're still... breathing!
"Are you okay?" Ezra asked and I felt my spine shiver. Lord, this friendship was going to be painful.
"All good, have a seat," I pointed at a chair, one of two perched in front of a small, round table. Fuck me, it even looked like a date. Unintentionally of course - it was only me here, I didn't need a big table. Yet the set up looked almost staged. I felt my cheeks redden and it didn't help that mister CEO was staring at me with those gorgeous fucking eyes.
Ezra sat and I grabbed ice out of the freezer, quickly wrapping the few cubes in a tea towel before the cold burnt my fingers. I passed it to him without a word and he gave me a grateful smile as he pressed the make-do ice pack against his knuckles.
"I didn't mean to call you so out of the blue. I wasn't interrupting anything?" The man asked and I shook my head, sitting across from him and shoving my chin in my hand as I stared.
"Nope. I had the day off work, you're lucky," I teased and he chuckled.
"Very lucky," he agreed good heartedly, honouring my air of self importance.
I picked up my fork and swirled cheesy corn around my fork. Corn cheese was basically canned corn - drained - mixed with cheese - mozzarella or cheddar - with mayonnaise, melted in the microwave or oven until it was this sticky, yummy bowl of goodness. Totally not healthy but - you only live once.
Right? So let's not get diabetes Jae.
I rolled my eyes at the more sensible voice in the back of my head - the one that berated me about all the bad choices I'd ever made. She was a hoe.
"Jae?"
"Hmm?" My head jerked up.
"The corn cheese is good," Ezra tilted his head, causing a few strands of his curled hair to fall across his forehead. I shifted almost uncomfortably, not expecting to feel pride that my 'cooking' pleased him. It was nothing special, it shouldn't have mattered. I was being delusional.
"Damn right it's good. If you ever loose your company and go broke, at least you have a go-to cheap meal. All thanks to me of course."
He laughed, like a hearty, head thrown back laugh that had all types of butterflies erupting in my stomach. This was so godamn dangerous. I couldn't think.
Ezra finally looked at me, his green eyes twinkling. I amused him. I could tell with the way he couldn't stop smiling and... I was so internally fucking pleased with myself that it was hard to remain neutral with my features.
My friends always laughed at my jokes. I was the unserious, loud mouthed one. Clown was my middle name, yet Ezra laughing at my joking was different to my friends. It felt different.
"I'll remember you, if I go broke. Hopefully not but I guess this meal will make it bearable," he finally spoke, his deeper voice giving me chills.
There was a pause before he suddenly spoke again. "Tell me about yourself."
"I'm twenty-five. I'm a bartender."
He gave me a pointed glare, one eyebrow raised in obvious distaste. Too vague? I was never good at talking about myself. I was happy with my life but I always felt like others were judging me when I told them about myself. Insecure, you could say.
Yet Ezra waited patiently for me to say more, like he was genuinely interested about me. Correction, I wanted him to be genuinely interested.
"I moved to America from Korea when I was five with my parents," I blurted, before I could stop myself. Then I internally cringed. I hated talking about it. It was a sensitive topic and I'd thrown myself right in the deep end.
Ezra seemed surprised. I tried not to get defensive. It wasn't like he asked me to talk about it and besides, he didn't say anything yet either.
"Why America?"
Now it was my turn to act surprised. I'd never been asked that before. Normally the next thing I heard was 'really? You speak english so well!'
"I have no idea," I finally answered him seriously. "I'll ask my parents the next time I see them."
He nodded thoughtfully. "Any siblings?"
"Nope. Only child! I asked for a little brother once, I didn't get one," I pouted.
My mom told me the baby delivery service closed after I turned seven. It turns out we were just poor and she and dad couldn't afford to have another baby - not while trying to get me into good education schemes.
"What do you do when you're not bartending?"
"I'm a stripper."
His eyebrows shot up and I snorted.
"You believed it? Wow... I'm offended..." I teased, before adding "They declined my application. Couldn't handle this booty."
He shook his head at my playing, muttering scoldingly under his breath. Though I could tell he liked it.
"That doesn't make sense," he rasped, his green eyes zooming in on me. "Your booty is gorgeous."
He'd know. He'd been inside it. Twice.
And just like that, the sexual tension between us bloomed, or more like exploded, like a thick cloud of smoke. My face got hot and I squirmed in my seat like a preteen who'd popped his first boner.
Friends. Friends. FRIENDS.
MARRIED!
I got up quickly, breaking the spell and bringing my bowl over to the sink. "You want anything else?" I asked now that I could finally breathe.
There was no answer.
Then I felt it. His big body behind me, pressing me into the counter as he placed his bowl beside my own. His body heat, his scent, everything had me tense - the wrong kind of tense. The aroused kind of tense.
Ezra seemed to be pushing our hypothetical boundaries and I knew he was waiting for a reaction from me. He wanted me to respond and then I knew where this would go.
My heart beat sped up and I swallowed thickly. His hard chest was right against my back, his bruised hands on either side of my body. He pressed his face against my cheek, over my shoulder and I closed my eyes, warring with myself.
"Ezra, I thought.... I thought you were here to talk."
"We were talking. Then you brought up your ass."
"In passing, not so that this - agh fuck."
I cursed at the feel of his obvious erection pressed against the curve of my buttocks. He was doing it on purpose and my need to have insanely erotic sex with this man increased.
"Ezra you're m-"
"Stop. Stop saying it."
I let out a frustrated growl. "We can't just brush it under the carpet! You're asking too much of me! You might not have a functioning guilty conscience, but I do and-"
He spun me around so that we were chest to chest. Then he gripped my face in both of his large hands, holding my jaw tightly. We locked eyes, his intense green ones on my worried brown. I couldn't escape. I felt like I was getting sucked in and the almost pleading look on his face as he muttered his next words made me cave.
"I'm asking you to forget when you're with me because you're my only escape. Please Jae."
My name was a whisper on his lips and I felt goosebumps erupt up my arms. I was his only escape? What did that even mean?! And why was I so happy to hear that I was almost valued by him. I was confused - this was a mess. Yet the vulnerability in the way he delivered those lines made me nod my head.
"Okay," I whispered shakily, wondering what in the hell I was agreeing to and if it was the right choice.
Side bitch. You're agreeing to be his slutty, secret side bitch. Because he's married.
Putting it like that hurt more then I thought it would. I was allowing myself to be used like I wasn't worth anything more. Like I wasnt worth being his husband rather than his affair. Like my parents didn't bring me up to have more respect for myself and others - his wife.
In a way, I knew that a lot of people were going to get hurt by the end of this.
But I didn't stop Ezra from titling my head up and pressing his lips to my own. I didn't stop him from pushing my shorts and underwear down my legs. I didn't stop him from fucking me against my kitchen counter, or again in my bedroom or against the wall in the shower. No, I let him do it.
And I enjoyed it. Because there was just something about Ezra that didn't allow me to say no.
I just prayed that I'd be able to handle it the day karma comes around and bites me in the ass.
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