The only sound that could be heard was faint sobs from some of the Greene family. Beth broke away from Patricia's arms and climbed over the bodies. She found her mother and started to cry. "Ma..."
Annette's eyes snapped open. She growled and tried to pull Beth down to her face. Beth began to scream. It was a bloodcurdling, frightened screeching laced with grief.
"Come on! Pull her away, pull her away!" T-Dog and Shane separated the girl from the monster. Andrea thought faster yanking a scythe down from the barn wall. Annette snarled one last time, and then she was gored by the scythe. Beth just cried even more after that.
Hershel, aided by Maggie and Patricia, was walking back to the farmhouse. Shane took off after Hershel and shouted, "We've been out- we've been combing these woods looking for those kids and she was in there all along? You knew."
"Leave us alone." Maggie snapped. "We didn't know! Otis was in charge of putting those- things- inside the barn." Shane continued to argue. I didn't care anymore. We'd spent so much time looking for those kids. Even now, we'd only found one.
What would happen now? Hershel wanted us gone, and with Eliza dead, the chances of her younger brother surviving were looking less and less likely. He was out there, alone. We could only guess why they'd separated. All we had as evidence was a doll that belonged to Eliza.
All I could do was hang back, my mind tumbling down a hole as it tried to make sense of what had just happened.
The Morales siblings ran. Glenn had mentioned that one set of prints had been heading the right way, but then turned to follow the other set leading into the woods. Meaning that one of the siblings had tried to run away from the highway for some reason. But what had scared them? We would have seen a walker- unless it hadn't noticed the siblings, and then wandered further up the highway to re-join the herd. The kids wouldn't have risked going to the highway if they thought a walker was still there.
Maggie had said Otis was in charge of putting walkers inside the barn. Meaning that he had to have found Eliza the morning we went searching, just HOURS before Carl was shot. The only explanation then, was that Eliza had been bitten the night before that.
And the doll. Daryl had found it by the creek. That would explain why Otis found Eliza- she was close to the farm when she was bitten. She might have dropped the doll when she got bit. If her brother was with her, he'd have likely run away. That girl had been torn into on her neck and arm; she wouldn't have gotten far before she lost too much blood and died.
Shane approached me as Hershel and his family flocked into the farmhouse. Rick had already began walking to camp. He cast a confused look our way before continuing his journey.
Shane's face was red. He looked at me with rabid eyes. I shuddered under his deranged gaze. Whatever had happened back there was still going on inside his mind.
"This is such bullshit," he ranted. He rubbed the back of his head hard enough to pull skin from bone. "we've been looking for two dead kids for nothin'. These people are crazy, man, they're crazy."
"Maybe," I agreed. "but you made that situation worse."
"Me?" he spat.
I pressed my lips together firmly, but it wasn't enough to hold back the flood. "What you just did was crazy, Shane. I wanted the walkers dead, I did, but I didn't think we'd be killing 'em in front of Hershel and his family!"
"So, what- what? You thought we were gonna nicely ask if we could kill his wife? His son?" Shane stepped closer, much to close for me to feel safe. The hairs on my arms stood up straight. I tensed the muscles in my legs, ready to run if I needed to.
"I thought we'd be handling it as a group-"
"Oh, you're part of this now?" He placed both hands on the back of his head and guffawed. "weren't a few hours ago. Hell, you straight up said you weren't with us back at the highway."
"Don't turn this on me-"
"Why not? Ya'll seem quick to turn everything else on me. You think I wanted this? We could've been safe up at Fort Benning if we'd just done what I said in the first place."
"Fort Benning could be gone," I interjected. "and maybe we would have been able to get a lead on where Louis could have been, if you hadn't killed it."
It was the wrong thing to say. He knew who I meant. At the mention of Otis' death, Shane's eyes lit up like a match. He grabbed my wrist, pulling me closer. I struggled to break free from his bear-like grasp. My heart was going wild, beating so fast I was sure it was going to come flying from my throat.
"Now you listen damn hard," Shane breathed, tightening his grip. It felt like the bones in my wrist were going to shatter. "I was under the impression you understood me here. I trusted you with that, and man, I would just hate to have to-"
"The hells goin' on here?" A familiar, gruff voice demanded behind me. Shane dropped my wrist like I had burned him, stepped two paces back. He glared at Daryl as the man approached us. I felt like a baby deer, stuck between the stag and the wolf.
"Just a minor disagreement, Daryl, you carry on with your business." Shane's answered coldly. His glanced between me and Daryl, as if wondering if he could take us both on.
"Don't look like it," Daryl snapped, advancing. He stepped in front of me, placing his body between Shane and I. "why don't you back off?"
Shane rubbed the back of his head furiously but did as Daryl asked. With one last murderous glance my way, he stalked back to camp, slamming the door of Dale's R.V. shut behind him.
Daryl turned to me, lightly placing my wrist into his large palms. He turned my arm over, examining the slightly bruising left by Shane's powerful grip.
"He hurt you?" Daryl asked. His other hand gripped his crossbow tightly.
"A bit," I admitted, "ow!"
"Sorry," he was speaking softly, as if talking to a child. "what the hell did he want?"
"He... I don't even know, he went off about the barn and looking for the kids, all I did was tell him it wasn't the right way to do it."
Daryl dropped my wrist carefully. "He's paranoid."
"He's crazy, Daryl," I corrected him. "ever since we got here, he's been getting worse. I think what happened with Otis has screwed with his head."
"What, 'cause he killed him?" Daryl replied. My eyebrows shot up. Since when had Daryl known?
"How did you..."
"Thought I was obvious. Shane said Otis gave his life and held off the walkers, but he came back with Otis' gun." Dear God, how had I missed that?
"He thinks it's just me. That I'm the only one who knows." I realised. Shane had threatened to kill me. Or at least, he had been trying to, before Daryl saved me. I'd told Shane on the highway that I planned on leaving. How was I so stupid? I'd played right into his hands, and now I had put myself in danger. Most importantly though, had I put Josie in danger?
Daryl's reaction was worse. He placed his hand on my shoulder, looking into my eyes. "What did he say?" he asked concernedly.
I swallowed, trying to process the fear that filled me. It had chilled my bones, paralysing me. Quietly, I whispered, "I think he threatened to kill me."
Daryl's eyes widened. He stepped back, pacing back and forward. I could see the colour washing from his neck, travelling deep beneath his shirt.
"The hell with this!" he snarled. Suddenly, he began to barrel down to camp. I rushed to stop him, placing my hand on his chest and pushing him back.
"No- Daryl, NO!" He looked at me, confused, and perhaps even a little hurt. I removed my hand from his chest and explained myself. "if you go down there and confront him, he'll lie. Rick doesn't listen to a word anyone says about Shane, he's too loyal. Don't put yourself in danger for me. Please."
"He shouldn't have put his hands on you!" Daryl snapped. His face was painted in red again. "it ain't right."
There was a steely edge to his voice. It cut deep, a jagged maw filled with unfiltered rage and a much more personal connection than he was letting on. Suddenly, I wasn't so sure this was about me.
"It ain't," I agreed. "but you can't win this fight, not right now."
Slowly, Daryl's heavy breathing stopped. He looked at me, a flicker of understanding shadowed his face. Wordlessly, he walked past me, past camp. It was then I noticed his tent had been moved. It was now set up on a small hill, a stone throw away from camp. My heart sank. I knew he had been optimistic about finding Louis and Eliza. Now that one of them had found dead, Daryl had done what he did best. Bury it, and retreat into himself. I knew the feeling all too well. It was a shell I had yet to really emerge from. The outside world was too cruel, too hopeless. Better to not hope at all.
I found myself back at the barn, observing as the others carried bodies to a truck. All except Hershel's family and Eliza. They had been laid out, covered in bedsheets.
Andrea threw another corpse into the truck bed and walked over to join me, rubbing grime from her hands. "You doin' okay?"
"Of course," I replied. I tensed when I spotted Shane behind the wheel of the truck. He glanced at me but turned away as quickly as he had stared. "you agree with all this?"
"This?" she repeated. I gestured to the barn, and the bodies crumpled in front of it. She paused, breathing in the real question I had meant. "I think it needed to be done."
"Like this?"
"Maybe not exactly the way it went, but Shane got it done, I didn't see Rick helping."
"Rick never got the chance," I argued. "I agreed with Shane about killing the walkers, but it wasn't right. Not in front of Hershel's family, and certainly not in front of the kids."
Andrea motioned for us to help pick up more bodies. I followed, grabbing the legs of a woman as Andrea held the arms. She spoke as we carried it along to the truck. "Shane's doing what's best for us."
"Shane's doing what's best for Lori and Carl." I countered pointedly. Andrea bit her lip, glancing at Shane.
"You knew?" She whispered.
I chuckled. It seemed Lori and Shane's secret hadn't been so secret after all. "Put it together, I wasn't completely convinced I was right until I confronted Lori about it. You?"
"Amy. She saw them heading into the forest, one after another. They thought they were being smart about it." As she mentioned her sister's name, I watched as her face slipped. Andrea was good at playing the tough girl, but Amy's death still haunted her. Occasionally, the mask fell, and I got a glimpse of the hurting woman beneath it.
"Well, I stand by what I said," I added. We dropped the body into the truck bed. I wiped my hands on my jeans and grimaced. "he's not the same guy I met back when I first arrived."
"Things change," Andrea replied. "I'm not sure why he's being like this, but I have to believe it's for the group."
"You can't go around givin' everyone a second chance, Andrea." I warned her. She trusted Shane far too much. I didn't know why, but I knew he would throw her to the spooks at the first sign he was in danger.
I left them to their work and followed the trodden path in the field back to the campsite. Stopping to check on Josie, and I continued up and up, climbing the incline that led to Daryl's new camp.
There were squirrel skins handing from a line up by the hill. Daryl had built up a fire and made quite a nice little survival camp for himself. The man himself, however, was nowhere to be seen. Because of my past experience with Dale and Glenn being sneaky bastards, I kept my guard up.
Daryl had some sort of bark wrapped in filter paper; it was boiling inside a pan of water over the fire. I didn't question why; it wasn't at the top of my list of questions right now. I was hoping to talk to Daryl, and maybe figure out something. Without it being awkward, if possible.
The tent rustled, and the hunter himself glowered at me. He turned his back on me and started fussing with the animals hanging from the lines. So he was avoiding me now. Then again, he seemed to be avoiding everyone. "You wanna tell me why you moved up here?"
"No." He snapped. I bit my lip to stop myself from tearing into him.
"Listen, Daryl, I'm a little concerned here."
"Why? I ain't doin' nothing."
"Is this about Eliza, because-"
"Screw you. This is about this damn group. It's broken. Shane's went bat shit and Rick ain't got the damn balls to say anything!"
"Oh, so the solution is to hide up here? We've still got to find Louis."
"That kid is DEAD!" He roared. "You're as stupid as them to believe you got a chance at finding him."
"I KNOW he's dead!" I spat, finally losing it. Daryl flinched against the wave of rage I finally let loose. "but I gotta try! Damn it, I got a sister down there who thinks I'm a piece of shit, and I have NO idea what I'm meant to do." I took a deep breath and tried to force my emotions back into place. I could feel the tears rising. "I know I should leave, but I feel like I want to stay. I got a brother out there somewhere who I'll NEVER see again, and I've tried- I've tried so HARD to pretend I've gotten used to the way shit is and I can't anymore," I'd put him into a very horrible position. Daryl seemed lost, he rocked back and forth on his heels, glowering at me. I took a deep breath, counting to ten in my head. "so, you can sit up here and mope around and act like a whiny bitch, or you can grow the hell up and talk to me. All ya'll act like you got it real bad, but you were all cosy in the quarry for two whole months. I was on the road; I saw walkers kill people; people turn into walkers- people killing people. I see them- Rick, Dale, T-Dog, they look at me and they remember the man I killed in Atlanta, what happened to Morales, to Merle." I collapsed onto the ground. Surprisingly, Daryl lowered himself into the grass and sat with me. "I'm not a bad person. I'm not. I do what I had to in order to survive."
"I know." He said finally. His face was stony and impenetrable. If he was hurt by the mention of Merle, he had hidden it well.
We sat there in silence for a while. And I felt better for it. Just two people, with a shared grief, trying to make it work in a world that had chewed them up and spat them back out.
And below us, a fire fed by corpses burned secrets beyond the barn.
Apparently, we'd missed half the drama down in camp whilst we had been sat on the hill
Apparently, we'd missed half the drama down in camp whilst we had been sat on the hill. Beth had collapsed. "Shock." Patricia later told me. "That poor girl just watched her family get slaughtered."
Hershel was missing. We'd just missed Rick and Glenn, who had taken a car and went after him. Maggie and Lori were both huddled together on the porch, waiting for them to come back. That meant Shane was in charge, and I wasn't sure how I felt about that. Did I trust him to make the decisions that needed to be made? Yes. Did I trust him to put everyone's needs in his mind when making those decisions? Well, today had been an excellent example of how he failed that.
"When's the funeral?"
"We were going to wait until Rick and Glenn got my dad, but it's been an hour now." Maggie was worried. "My dad's been drinking again. I've got enough to worry about with Beth, and now this..."
"He'll be okay, Maggie. Glenn won't leave him there; he cares for you too much." Maggie beamed and gave me a brief hug. It felt nice to be hugged. I was glad that I could call Maggie a friend too. If we had met before the infection, I imagined that we would have gotten along even then.
I walked beside Daryl when the group went to the funeral of the people we had lost. They were buried next to Otis. I stood back and watched as Carol volunteered to bury Eliza. Sophia ran forward just as the first pile of dirt was shovelled up. "Wait!" She presented Eliza's doll to Carol. "she should have this." The doll joined Eliza when she was buried. It was only a shame that we didn't have Hershel to say a prayer over them. I wasn't a believer, but sometimes it helped ease the pain of others.
I felt nothing throughout the entire service. No remorse, no guilt, no sadness. I'd poured out all my feelings and my anger to Daryl on that hill. It had been a very cathartic experience. One I had needed for quite some time.
Daryl stopped me as I was leaving. He stood silent, waiting for everyone to pass us by. As the last person left the makeshift graveyard, he spoke. "I don't think its safe for you to be stayin' in camp."
"Just figured that out?" I asked. I'd had the same thought myself. If Shane was serious, then I had reason to be cautious. He had left Otis to die, all it took was one chance, and I couldn't be sure Shane wouldn't risk it. He had too much at stake.
"I was thinkin' you move your tent up the hill." Daryl said. He sounded unsure, as if questioning his own words.
"Excuse me?"
"Just an idea," He quipped. Oh, he thought I was offended. Quite the opposite really. I wanted to say yes, and to move my tent up to the hill. But Josie wouldn't be very pleased with that; unlike me and Daryl, Josie loved being a part of a big group, a family. She felt no desire to hide away from people and spend time alone some days. "wasn't saying you had to."
"No- I agree with you, but I got a sister who likes being down here." He nodded in understanding and slouched off to his new camp. I'd forgotten that being alone wasn't the same as being lonely. "Daryl- wait!" He turned around to stare at me with that constant glare on his face. "I can see if Josie will stay in the R.V with Carol." I didn't mention that the extra bed set up inside had been for Louis and Eliza. It was still too real for either of us to process so quickly.
"It don't matter, really. I ain't needing you up there or anything." He backtracked.
"I know."
"Don't split you and the kid up just 'cause I asked or anything, really-"
"Daryl." I interrupted him. "I know." He stalked off towards the hill. I couldn't quite say he'd asked because he enjoyed my company, but at least I knew he didn't want me to die.
I looked around camp for Josie, and finally found her in the R.V. with Dale, Carl and Sophia. Dale looked at me with that friendly, if slightly judgy, stare of his. I ignored him. He got up, busying himself with cleaning the bedroom in the back.
"Hey kids, could I talk to Josie for a moment."
"Sure." Sophia replied. "Jo, we'll be with Carl's mom." I laughed as they both walked away.
"Jo, huh? That's new."
"I kinda like it." She answered, smiling.
I sat down next to her and she cuddled into my side. "Carl heard you talking to Daryl."
"Oh. Did he tell you..."
"Yeah." She squeezed my waist. "I can stay with Sophia and Carol. They already said yes." It faintly hurt to hear that she wasn't upset that I was leaving her down here. "is it because Daryl's your boyfriend?"
"What- no! It ain't anything like that." There weren't even romantic feelings involved here. Lust and loneliness tended to appear at the worst moments, that's all.
"Okay then," She didn't sound very convinced. "can I go play with Carl and Sophia now?"
"Of course, kiddo." I smiled at her. She got up, and I noticed her hair had being pulled into an elaborate braid. I imagined Lori or Carol had done it for her.
Dale's head peered around the wall as the door shut. "Children, huh? Always in a rush to be somewhere, so long as its somewhere exciting, of course." He returned to his seat with a glass of water, across from me.
"What do you want?" I asked. Dale rarely made light conversation.
"I wanted to know if you were alright." He became serious all of a sudden. The humorous twinkle in his eye was gone. "I know, back at the CDC, you promised Miranda that you would look after her children. I'm worried that this is affecting you a lot more than you seem to let on." He was a psychic, I swore it. The man seemed to know everything about everyone.
"I couldn't kill it." I admitted.
"What?"
"I couldn't kill Eliza. When she came outta that barn, I froze. I told Miranda that I'd take care of her children- I failed." I felt a laugh escape my throat. It burned. "I even felt angry because Shane couldn't finish what he started. I've killed the living but couldn't kill a little girl long dead." I looked at Dale pleadingly. I needed some sort of reassurance, some comfort. "does that make me a hypocrite? Or a coward?"
"It makes you human." He answered. "we forget that even at our lowest, there is always something deep within ourselves that could pull us back at the drop of hat." He had taken off his own hat to prove this point. "although some people seem to do that backwards. They pretend to be good men, when they're really monsters inside."
"Talkin' about Shane?"
"Shane seems to believe he- and only him- knows what's best for this group." He glanced outside the window warily. "Back at the quarry, Shane had his gun locked on Rick. He could've killed him right then and there."
"And you didn't tell anyone about this?"
"And have what happen? He's threatened me more than once, and I fully believe he's capable of killing me- or anyone who happens to cross him." He examined my face, those wise old eyes squinted. There were crow's feet in the corners. "But I think you already knew that."
"Shane... is difficult to place. He isn't just doing things for the sake of it. He's obsessed with survival. And I think he's jealous of Rick."
"Of course he is. He's already upset over Lori, and with Rick coming back and taking control it's just getting worse and worse."
"Does everyone know about Shane and Lori?" I asked, resisting the urge to laugh.
"Anyone who was paying attention. Me, Amy, possibly Andrea. I'm almost certain Daryl knows," He crossed his arms, leaning back in his seat. ""Amy noticed first, she always saw them sneaking off together. She was a smart girl."
"He threatened to kill me too," I confessed. Dale's eyebrows disappeared under his hat. "because of what I knew, about Otis."
"He's become very dangerous," Dale exclaimed, throwing his arms into the air. "if we continue to let him make decisions, I'm worried he'll end up getting us all killed."
Carol burst into through the R.V. door.
"Have either of you seen Lori?"
"No, why?"
"She's missing. I think she went after Rick."