love / ləv /
an intense feeling of deep affection.
•••
I smirk. "You can't buy love."
Soo-won stares at me and sighs. "You will become my queen. That's an order."
"I don't take orders from traitors. Now don't you have to be somewhere?"
"I have all the time in the world," Soo-won replies and glares at me. "Himari. If you marry me, I'll take Yona and Hak's name off the Wanted Poster. Don't you want them to travel with no concerns?"
I look down at my feet. He's not wrong, but what am I willing to sacrifice by doing this?
'I think you only have one choice,' the voice whispers in my right ear.
The dragon is right. I only have one choice.
"I'll marry you." I sigh.
King Il. I'm so sorry.
Soo-won smirks. "Great. I'll meet you here tonight."
And the man in the white cloak walks away, satisfied with my answer.
Should I regret this?
I said Soo-won was the traitor, but maybe I'm the traitor now.
My legs begin to shake and I fall onto the brick path.
I could've sworn I felt water slide down my cheeks.
But I won't allow myself to cry.
I won't admit that I cried.
I cover my mouth and stare at the arch
Soo-won walked under. So what's next? I have to become a queen? What will everyone else think?
I hear footsteps coming from behind me, but I ignore them.
"Lady Himari! What's the matter?" Hak asks.
If only I could tell him the truth, but all I say is, "Hak, I'm sorry."
Hak stares at me in confusion. I stand up and slowly walk back to the dock, wiping the tears off my face.
•••
Kija rests his head on the table, slowly drifting off to dreamland.
His cheeks are pink. I'm guessing he didn't handle the alcohol too well, and on top of that, he was awake all last night.
"Wake up, Kija! You can't stay there all day!" Yona yells.
"I'm awake!" Kija stands up and rubs his eyes.
Yona smiles at him and walks over to the ship, tripping on a rock.
"Woah, there!" Hak catches Yona before she hits the floor, like he always does.
"Yoon! What are you cooking?" I ask, staring at the pot. The ingredients in the pot were brought to a boil, and Yoon was stirring the soup.
"Cabaloni Porridge. I figured that the guys need something easy on their stomach." Yoon responds, tasting the porridge. "They've all been drinking too much."
"Can I serve it?" Yona asks. Without even listening for Yoon's answer, she touches the handles and yelps in pain. "Ow!"
"Yona, are you okay?" I ask.
"Yeah... just burnt my hands. Who's hungry?!" She looks over at the pirates and asks. They all cheer in response.
Yoon serves everyone a small bowl of porridge. We all sit in a circle and begin to eat Yoon's food.
"It's so good!" Yona smiles in satisfaction. "You're the best cook in the world, Yoon."
"Yona... your dripping." A pirate says, pointing at the porridge on Yona's dress.
"Here, you can borrow my napkin..." a pirate sweatdrops.
Instead of taking the napkin, Yona begins to take off her dress.
Hak drapes his haori over her shoulders. "Not here. Go change clothes in the captains quarters."
Yona blushes. "Okay..." She picks up her clothes and rushes to Captain Gi-gan.
I sigh and give my empty bowl to Yoon.
"I'm going to go change out of this dress as well," I say and pick up the folded clothes next to my sword.
•••
I sit on the side of the ship in my new clothes. The same old haori, obi, and protective padding.
I pick up my short sword and stare at my reflection.
My hair was still a mess, so I quickly stand up and run to Yoon's bag.
He'd hate it if he caught me looking through his stuff, but I just need one thing.
I pull out a sharp pair of scissors and walk back to my spot on the side of the ship.
Starting with the hair framing my face, I trim my hair, trying to keep it around the same length.
The back was a little bit trickier.
If I ask Yoon for help, he'll find out that I was looking through his bag and will kill me. I look around the ship, searching for an apricot-haired boy.
"Himari. Looking for someone?" Hak asks.
"Yeah, Yoon. Actually, Hak, can you cut hair?" I ask, trying to avoid Yoon.
"How do you think I keep my hair in shape?" He smirks.
"I wasn't asking for a question, I was asking for an answer," I say. "But then again, that's basically an answer. Hak, help me cut my hair."
He sighs and yanks the scissors out of my hands. Then, he begins to cut my hair.
"Don't cut too much off," I whisper.
"Yeah, yeah. I mean, I'll shave your hair off." Hak replies.
I chuckle and stare at the waves.
Night will be here any second now. Or at least, it will seem as if it's here any second now.
•••
I look at my hair in the reflection of my sword. "Hak! You did a great job!" I praise. He sighs and walks away from me, not accepting my compliment.
He cut the hair evenly, although the hair framing my face was a bit shorter than the rest. My bangs were the perfect length, and neat and tidy.
I know who I want my personal hairstylist to be from now on!
•••
I watch the sunset. It was beautiful. I wouldn't be able to see a sun-like this at the palace.
The dragons, Hak, and Yona all laughed together on the ship. I was the only one not there. I was the extra person that should've been there, but not anymore.
I stand up and pick up my short sword. The scene in front of me reflected onto the sword.
Memories of when I bought this sword with Hak flooded my mind.
Those happy memories will soon vanish, and I'll never see them again.
•••
Sorrow.
Regret.
Guilt.
•••
I hear my emotions once again.
I look around. I'm back in this weightless, clear, void.
'What are you going to do?' The Orange Dragon asks. 'Will you finally accept my power and avenge King Il's death?'
I stare at the shiny scales on the dragon. "I said I don't need your power."
'Oh, but I'm sure deep inside you want it.'
"You're wrong. If I kill the man I marry, the entire kingdom will find out, right?"
'If Soo-won didn't get caught, I'm sure you wouldn't either.'
"Soo-won is smart. He makes last-minute plans and they all work out."
'I see.'
"Now, please leave. I'd like to wake up."
And the void disappears as if it never existed.
•••
Night falls upon us quickly, and soon, all that can be seen is the light of the lanterns on the ship and Jae-ha playing a beautiful tune on his erhu.
I grab my sword and take one last look at the ship.
I'm sorry.
And with that, I begin to walk away from the port, and into the town.
•••
No noise. I can barely hear the sound of
Jae-ha's instrument.
My breathing becomes unsteady as I walk under the arch Soo-won walked under.
My legs shake a little when I see the golden-haired man. He smiles at me, and I don't return it.
The man knows what I'm thinking. He knows I regret my choices, and he hugs me. He can't blame me for hating myself.
"Himari, it'll all be alright."
"For you," I reply. "I'm doing this for Hak and Yona, not myself."
I think of Kija, and how angry he'll be the next time we meet.
Then I think of Shin-ah. I'll never see his face and be able to admire his golden eyes again.
Then, Jae-ha. The absence of his catchphrases will leave a hole in my heart. My heart will never secretly flutter like it did when we met.
And finally, I think of Hak and Yona, my best friends. They've always been my side, and never hated me, even when I was gone for five years.
I'll miss them.
Soo-won presses his lips against my left eyelid and smiles at me.
He truly did love me.
I've never felt attracted to a man. But I suppose I'm willing to fall in love with Yona's cousin.
The man she loved.
And the man that murdered her father.
•••
The palace looks the same as before. Beautiful golden accents lie in the same places.
A few tears fall out of my eyes, but Soo-won wipes them away before they can touch my clothes.
I hate this.
I hate him.
Can I really fall in love with the man I yearn to forget?
Some guards gasp when they see me with the king, others stay calm.
Soo-won hops off his horse. I do the same.
He motions for me to follow him, and I obey.
The young man leads me to the room I should've stayed in that night, the room King Il had set up for me. Everything was still perfect.
And I was ruining that perfect setup. But I don't have time to think about these silly things.
Soo-won watches me set my sword down.
"Himari. I'm so sorry... I feel so..."
"No, you don't. You want me to be with you. You set this all up!" I cut Soo-won off. "I swear I said you couldn't buy my love... and right now, you're basically buying a human."
"Are you saying... you don't love me?" Soo-won asks emotionless. Is he stupid?
"Damn right, I don't!" I shoot back. Maybe I was too harsh, but it didn't matter. "You kill the king, try to kill Hak and Yona, and say you want to marry me after I saw everything you did?!"
"It wasn't supposed to happen." He replies.
"Honestly... I don't understand you at all." I shake my head.
And the man chuckles in response. I watch him laugh at my statement.
"Himari, we'll be married a few days after the next Five-General Meeting. That's in approximately five days." Soo-won says.
"Shouldn't you ask my father about marrying me first?"
"Oh... I didn't think about that." Soo-won scratches the back of his head and giggles nervously. "Either way, if I'm correct, the Generals need to approve of our marriage first."
"Yeah..." I mumble, not understanding politics.
Maybe this wasn't a mistake.
Maybe this was right.
Maybe this is fate.
Perhaps this is the path Ik-soo told me to walk on, and soon, I'll see them again.
Then I'll be able to apologize.
•••
Words: 1783
Alright, another chapter. Get ready for another one because I can write a chapter in about a day.
I feel like I'm the beginning of this story I didn't have a lot of dialogue for Himari, but now I do. Maybe it's because she's more of an important character now.
Feel free to vote if you liked this chapter!
Now I'll start working on the next chapter and blowing your phone (or whatever device your using) up with notifications <3