Jeongguk Discrimination Squad
Sep. 30
12:09 P.M.
Jiminie; okay i think i got this one in the bag
Jiminie; i have the upper hand now
Jiminie; i got it h a n d l e d
Seokjinnie; he pulled you into his lap and let you cuddle into him
Seokjinnie; then left pissed off
TaeTae; he is a demon brother of gukkie, who once made you pee your pants he was so mean to you
TaeTae; GUKKIE
TaeTae; not his scary older son of satan half brother who horns are twice the size of guks
Jiminie; i understand that but now i have the upper hand
gukkie; which is?
Jiminie; his little tail he has
Jiminie; it won't leave me alone
Jiminie; his little weakness is me!
Jiminie; but only for one appendage of his body, but whatever
Jiminie; we have progress!
gukkie; uh i don't think thats how that works
Jiminie; sure it is! Your mom told me all about it
gukkie; ah, right
gukkie; she doesn't know what she's talking about, he knows full well what he is doing
Seokjinnie; not to be the smartest one here or anything, but he also thinks you're human not an angel, and you KNOW he's a demon, so you can take precautions around him and he thinks he can relax around you
TaeTae; okay but jimin isn't dumb he knows that
TaeTae; he only said the tail thing cause he thinks it's cute and wants us to know he's Yoongi's favorite
Jiminie; he said it's not a me thing, he said it just does its own thing
gukkie; hA what a lame ass excuse
gukkie; he likes you, no doubt
Seokjinnie; everyone likes chim no one is shocked
TaeTae; even meanies like satan jr.
Jiminie; no he's not, he hates me
Seokjinnie; he is a demon, they hate everyone
TaeTae; maybe he hates u a little less
Jiminie; he hates me most lol
Seokjinnie; i think he hates me the most
Seokjinnie; i just wanted to see his tail
gukkie; jimin just wants to see his dick
Jiminie; no no stop
TaeTae; well if his horns are twice the size of guks 👀👀
gukkie; mean
Jiminie; stop please
Seokjinnie; chimmy you cant really believe he doesn't like you, he wont even let me or tae touch him and he let you sit in his lap
TaeTae; tbf i exposed his ass so
Jiminie; it's only because we're roommates and i'm not playing fair, i'm kinda making him like me
Jiminie; kinda??
Jiminie; im just making him act on his nicer impulses, and they happen to be directed at me
Jiminie; he doesn't know you guys so it makes sense
Jiminie; im sure he doesn't like me, but i don't need him to
Jiminie; i just hope he can use me to learn he can be a better person
Seokjinnie; you already started using magic ?
TaeTae; it didn't seem like he was acting on nicer impulses, because then he wouldn't have been so bi-polar
Jiminie; i wasn't while you guys were over, no
Jiminie; just a little around his mom
Jiminie; wait
gukkie; and he has realized it
Jiminie; i didn't while you guys were over
Jiminie; gUYS HE'S WARMING UP IM SO HAPPY
Seokjinnie; yea so why aren't we talking about when u broke the mug and he got up and pulled you away from the glass and totally shielded ur feet from the ceramic cause i saw the way they'd move before you stepped on them and then basically held ur hand before fixing ur mug.
TaeTae; because it was so sweet i will CRY
Jiminie; he wouldn't let me hold onto his arm tho, i think he would have done that for any of you
Jiminie; you guys are reading to far into it! He's just getting better!
Seokjinnie; he let ur hand stay for a solid five minutes no bull
TaeTae;^^^^
Seokjinnie; he would not have helped us wym that bish would have laughed, even Gukk hates him
TaeTae; yea but the way he is protective of Guk 🥺 my heart uwU
gukkie; that isn't because i hate him, it's because i love you
Jiminie; awww, how sweet
gukkie; fuck off
Jiminie; okay, i got to go anyways, i have to heat up Yoongi some lunch
Jiminie; talk to you guys later!
TaeTae; bye chim
Seokjinnie; later babes
******
NO PORN
Sep. 30
12:45 P.M.
Yoongi; fuck me, really
Tiddies; i have, ur tight, solid fuck tho
Yoongi; i made u do that cause u pissed me off u weren't supposed to like it
Tiddies; and yet
Hoesuck; yOU dON'T hAvE a SeX tOrtUrE pErMit YoU cAn'T dO tHAt
Hoesuck; leave me and my boy alone, asswipe😤😤
Hoesuck; you think your dick is a blessing, i swear its not
Hoesuck; but whats up
Yoongi; yes i do fuck face, some of us have all of our torture badges
Yoongi; i made u suck me off before, everyone is equal
Tiddies; i can vibe with that logic
Yoongi; anyways, my tail is
Yoongi; addicted to jimin
Hoesuck; lmao that means you are too lol
Tiddies; ???? human
Yoongi; its like a boner but longer and can do whatever it wants
Tiddies; so jimins hot?
Yoongi; i meant *heart boner
Tiddies; well shit
Hoesuck; yeah i was about to ask how that cute little shit could be hot
Hoesuck; he is strictly cute
Hoesuck; but yeah i think you are whipped for him
Yoongi; he still pisses me off and i still want to make him a worse person
Yoongi; but now it's because he needs to stand up for himself, not cause he's my subject
Yoongi; fuck
Hoesuck; see, we do all have a heart, yoongi
Hoesuck; you just needed to find the right person
Hoesuck; and it sounds like you did uwu
Yoongi; well the problem here is that I can't date a human and I definitely can't date someone as nice as him because it my dad finds out i am fucking screwed, I have too much work and school and I haven even checked in on you and gukk, u two are dating humans and fairies and I am screwed
Yoongi; i cant like him, it goes on my record, it'll piss demons off that someone with a record is in charge, and being a manager that breaks conduct could lose me my wings and that is NOT good, because i have to use them for satan-duties for teleportation and i fucking cant if i don't have them
Tiddies; wait ur mean because you'll lose everything you've worked for if ur not
Yoongi; NO SHIT NAMJOON
Hoesuck; fuck whatever other demons think, yoongi! Your dad is a douche anyways and has to step down soon too, besides, our motto is "if it is 1 or 100 sins you're still getting sent to hell. So why not go for 1,000,000 sins and come down here a legend." so commit every good thing in the book, because whats a bigger fuck you than doing something even LITERAL SATAN said not to do? That's a double kill if i've ever seen one
Yoongi; it doesn't work like that
Yoongi; I have to care because i'm already half human, at this rate it'll be near impossible to have my subordinates respect
Tiddies; but like wouldn't it be a power move to seduce the nicest human ever, cute little innocent Jimin, and make him the persephone to ur hades
Tiddies; like you don't have to do every nice thing, just one really freaking hot "idgaf" thing
Yoongi; maybe. But being nice is hard for me
Yoongi; it's hard for all of us
Hoesuck; just get jimin to fall for you
Hoesuck; forget the whole subject thing, just make him fall for you
Hoesuck; shouldn't be too hard
Hoesuck; make him a little persephone pleaseeeeee you two would be my otp after me and joon
Yoongi; sorry I meant it's hard for everyone of us, save for my dumbass friend here
Tiddies; just do it m8, who will fire u? U?
Yoongi; me.
Tiddies; but he's worth it ?
Yoongi; we'll see, i gtg to a class now ttyl
Hoesuck; you two better only have one bed next time i visit
*****
Demon Daddy's
Sep. 30
2:08 P.M.
Yoongi; check in time, subject updates, seok then guk
Hoesuck; i got one, he cried because his dog died
bby demon; why tf do you even ask me
Yoongi; because you're supposed to find a new subject, you know it isn't an option. If anyone finds out they will take you off field work ffs
Yoongi; okay, thank you hobi
Hoesuck; get rekt gukk
bby demon; yoongi, i don't think i'm cut out for this, really
Yoongi; if you don't do it, they take you off of field work
Yoongi; if they take you off field work you don't get to come on surface unless it's for the halloween conference and that means you can't see Taehyung
Yoongi; i'm not trying to be mean, Jeongguk, i know you've been mad at me, but I'm trying to help us all. I'll lose my job and you'll lose yours
Yoongi; and if seok gets a new boss they'll find out he is dating joon and then he'll lose his too
Yoongi; just find someone guk
bby demon; what if i just quit entirely?
bby demon; what if i just gave up this whole demon thing?
bby demon; i want to have a normal relationship with tae without all this demon bullshit
bby demon; i want him to be happy, but i want to be happy too
Hoesuck; yoongi he wants to be with his boyfriend im crying they really do grow up fast don't they
Yoongi; if you quit, i lose my job as a manager and get moved back to my internship and seok gets a new boss
Yoongi; i know you dont want to be here, sometimes i wish i wasn't either
Yoongi; being stripped of Demon hood hurts, you'll be hurting yourself and seok
Yoongi; just
Yoongi; let me get to my dads position okay guk? And i wont make anyone live like this if they dont want to
Yoongi; being mean just isn't worth it anymore
bby demon; i don't know how much longer i can make it doing this anymore, yoongi
bby demon; promise me you'll get me out when you get up there?
Yoongi; real brother or not, you mean more to me than anyone else, sorry Hoseok
Yoongi; I promise, as soon as I can I will
Yoongi; but i can't yet, so until then please just do your work, or i might never get the opportunity
Hoesuck; owww that hurted
bby demon; i trust you, hyung
bby demon; and please
BBy demon; have one solid mood with jimin, he thinks you still hate him and we can all see you don't
Yoongi; stay out of that
Yoongi; i have a class now
Yoongi; bye
Hoesuck; lmao yeah he has a crush on jimin
bby demon; yeah i know, i like to think of them kinda as hades and persephone??
Hoesuck; oH MY GOD SAMMEEE
bby demon; never do that again
Hoesuck; fair.
Jimin💛
Oct. 1
2:27 P.M.
Jimin💛; Hey! I know you're in class, but i needed to formally invite you to attend my 20th birthday celebration on the roof of our building this weekend at promptly 9:30 and lasting until everyone goes home. I know my birthday isn't for another two weeks, but I like to celebrate a little early so i'm not stressed out on my actual birthday (and also because then everyone is obsessed about halloween and i don't want everyone to think it's a costume party, i learned that last year) and it would mean a lot if you would attend!
Yoongi; ugh
Yoongi; okay
Jimin💛; wait, really?
Yoongi; can i help decorate
Jimin💛; i can do it myself unless you really want to help
Jimin💛; it's not your party, i don't want you to feel burdened by it
Jimin💛; but you'll really come?
Yoongi; i asked if i could not if i have to
Yoongi; i'm going for a new mexico road trip with polaroids and a fort in the back of a truck vibe
Yoongi; i said okay
Jimin💛; i guess you can help if you want
Jimin💛; i was just going to do it myself, but i guess it's more fun if i have someone with me
Jimin💛; i just can't believe you want to come, let alone help
Yoongi; well if i'm going might as well be comfortable
Yoongi; i'll already have to either wear a hat or not show my horns and tail
Yoongi; what do u want
Jimin💛; am i bothering you? That was a very sudden change in mood
Yoongi; i meant as a gift
Jimin💛; oh
Jimin💛; i don't want anything, your presence is a gift😚
Yoongi; ew
Yoongi; u r so nice ur the bane of my existence and yet no one ever says thank u or gives u stuff
Yoongi; so i'll figure a gift out
Jimin💛; if you get me something i'll get you something extra don't test me
Yoongi; i'll just burn it???
Jimin💛; nO
Jimin💛; if you get me something i'll burn it😤😤
Jimin💛; and then still give you a gift for thinking about me
Yoongi; no u wouldn't
Yoongi; u don't have it in you, and it would make me sad
Jimin💛; then i will never use it and leave it under my bed and get you two gifts because you are sad
Yoongi; u will use it and show it off like a trophy, and i'll burn both of them
Yoongi; deal?
Jimin💛; no
Jimin💛; you told me to be more confident and stand up for myself, and this is me standing up for myself
Jimin💛; i am telling you, if you get me something, i will be getting you something, so just don't get me anything
Yoongi; what if i really want to give you something because the idea of seeing you with something i gave you makes my heart happy
Jimin💛; then you get something too
Jimin💛; deal?
Yoongi; is this as close as i'll get?
Jimin💛; yes😤😤
Yoongi; fine, angel
Yoongi; r u going out with tae or gukkie or the tall one tonight?
Jimin💛; no, i'm staying in tonight
Jimin💛; why?
Yoongi; wanted to cook but not if only i was gonna eat it
Jimin💛; do you need any help? I can make you dinner so you can relax after classes
Yoongi; u have dance till 7, yes i pay attention, and this is my last class today. I'll cook, just eat it
Jimin💛; oh, okay
Jimin💛; see you at seven, then
Yoongi; bye
******
Gukkie
Sep. 30
2:56 P.M.
Jiminie; hey is he always like this... bipolar??? He's suddenly being really nice???
*Images Attached*
Gukkie; I'm sorry
Gukkie; do you think;
Gukkie; "what if i really want to give you something because the idea of seeing you with something i gave you makes my heart happy"
Gukkie; is something you think he says to someone he hates
Gukkie; cause then we needa have a talk
Jiminie; it's just because i'm his roommate, but you're his brother, so is he ever like this with you?
Gukkie; I'm going to be honest with you Jimin, he isn't my brother, we're just childhood friends
Gukkie; his dumbass said that to try and hide the fact he's my boss, and ur his subject
Gukkie; but now ur not his subject, and i suck at my job so have the truth
Gukkie; he said the first nice thing to me yesterday, 18 years after he met me
Jiminie; excuse me what
Jiminie; you mean to tell me BOTH of you have been lying to me? You mean to tell me he's been trying to make my life miserable?? You didn't even bother to TELL me???
Jiminie; i let him move into my home, gukk!
Gukkie; i said it was bad
Gukkie; also yea, i'm a demon too
Gukkie; but u were too hard, he likes u too much and he basically thinks the relationship is no longer professional from his side so he gave up
Gukkie; i think he's still lying as to not make u mad at me but he'd never say it
Jiminie; i am fUMING right now
Jiminie; but it's okay i totally understand how you would feel that way everything is fine
Gukkie; would u rather i have of not told you
Gukkie; yoongi is an asshole, i have no way of knowing if he would have
Gukkie; he also said that to cover my ass because he didn't know if y'all knew what i was, and didn't want y'all asking about 'work'
Jiminie; i guess it's okay, i can't stay mad about this, you two were just trying to cover each other
Jiminie; but i will be discussing the whole 'subject' thing over dinner tonight
Jiminie; thanks for at least telling me
Gukkie; oh my gl with that
Gukkie; ten bucks you'll bring it up, he'll say tuff and move on
Jiminie; i'm not making any bets with you
Jiminie; talk to you later
Gukkie; never make deals with demons 😩
~
my mouth is numb af - Zepp {051220}
yes i def remember something about blue apron salmon in this fic - tae {011821}