ITS ALIVEEE! Its been how many weeks since I updated? Two? Three? I don't even have to know but anyways I dedicate this chapter to you Dhenling.
*~NF~*
“I still can’t believe you punched that guy on his face,” Jared was still laughing. The memory was still fresh in our minds from our date in the club earlier.
“Its not like I didn’t tell him to back off,” I answered in my defense. “Besides, you saw how he ignored what I said.”
Jared scratches his nape. It seems to be a habit of his when he doesn’t know what to say next. “Yea he didn’t,” his eyes were locked on his shoes on our walk to my building. There was no parking space near my apartment. Instead he parked his car in front of a shop near the building and walks me home.
Jared is walking in a slow pace which confuses me because he has longer legs. I think he wanted to spend time with me longer? I am not sure though. “You should have at least let me handle it,” Jared suggested with a hint of dismay. What is it with men and their egos?
Earlier in the club, I told Jared that I was thirsty so he excused himself to buy me a drink then this sleazy late-twenties guy popped out of nowhere and started grinding behind me. The first thing I did was to tell him that I was with someone but he didn’t listen and continued rubbing himself against me like a horny dog. Jared rushed towards my side and told him to back off.
I can feel the tension starting to build up; Jared was furious at Sleaze (Let’s just call him that) and Sleaze looked like a shot away from being alcohol poisoned. The place was dim and it wasn’t helping either: there were strobes of green lights and multicolored ones blinking and so many noisy people. It was bound to aggravate your inhibitions.
The people surrounding us started to leave a space, encircling around us as if they were expecting a brawl. I punched Sleaze right on his eye to prevent that from happening. My nimble fist started to sting but it was worth it seeing Sleaze have a black eye and a drip of blood from his brow. I hit him real good.
I rolled my eyes, “Oh please. It’s not the first time I punched a guy.”
Jared walked closer, brushing his arm against mine. “Really?” His tone seems to be picking up an interest. “Who was this guy? Your ex.”
I winced in mock disappointment, “Close. He was my friend’s asshole ex.”
“Should I feel threatened?” Jared placed his fist on his lips, suppressing a smile. Jared Hermosa stands at least 6 flat and muscles that are tracing through his grey dress shirt: making him look overqualified as an accountant. Compared to him, I am a kitten.
I took a good look at him. “Nope. Not at all.”
Jared laughs weakly, “Emerald you really are something.”
“That’s what they all say,’ I joked. My eyes were locked on my fingers pulling the loose long sleeves of my cold shoulder dark purple dress to cover my wrists. I noticed that my dress was riding up, making me even more self-conscious and began discreetly pulling the hem down.
“Is this your building?” I swiftly looked at him then at the entrance of my building: you’ll only walk out 5 flights of stairs until you see the glass doors with washed out green frames.
I breathed, “Yes it is. Thank you for tonight.” I gave him a polite smile before I started to walk towards the entrance.
I was stopped to take another step further by his grip on my wrist “Wait.” I looked over my shoulder at him.
I moved away from the entrance, resting my back on the walls of my building, “What is it?”
“This is our 3rd date, right?” Jared asked cautiously.
“No,” I replied.
“What? This is the 3rd time we went out,’ Jared’s expression seems more confused than before.
“Yes it is,” I agreed. “But the 1st and this, is not what I considered as a date.”
“Oh, ok.”
“I’m sorry Jared. The culture here in Philippines is much different from where you grew up,” I intended my words to bite him of his carelessness.
“But you know what?”
“What?”
“I really had fun today. I promise you next time that I will bring you out to your considerable date,” he gazed upon my eyes with a sincere smile. Somehow, I felt bad. Here I am counting any possible faults when he really means no harm.
I mirrored him a smile, “Really?”
“Yea,” Jared held my chin up with his fingers. “I can promise you that.”
Our gazes were locked to each other as he slowly leans closer to me. The moment was great yet I could not help feeling so uncomfortable. This guy may be raised in a different environment but he is understanding, and considerate to my culture. Not to mention that this guy is hot and has a stable job as an accountant. He hasn’t done anything wrong but somehow it does. It’s definitely not him so maybe I’m the problem but how? Why?
He was abruptly interrupted by the sound of my phone receiving a text. Immediately, I moved a few steps away, taking precaution to him trying to kiss me. “I have to go now.”
“What? Right now?” Jared’s brows knit together, puzzled. I shrugged my shoulders, giving him an I-can’t-help-it smile.
“Can I at least have a kiss?’ Jared playfully suggests.
I wrinkled my nose at the nose then gave him a haughty smile, “Now what good would I be if I’m too nice.” I decided to end it there and turned my heels to walk faster away from him.
I entered inside my building with my eyes glued to the screen of my smart phone. My brow rose in suspicion when I heard a voice that oddly says the same thing on the text, "Will you have coffee with me?"
I lifted my head and looked straight ahead to see him leaning on the wall wearing black and orange basketball shorts, a plain white shirt and black running shoes. He stood out against the faded green walls surrounding the elevator. "David. What are you doing here?" My rhetoric statement sounded more like an exclamation rather than a question.
"I am asking you to have coffee with me," he replied lightly. His tone hinted with feign of arrogance on a thin layer of sarcasm.
"But," I looked at my surroundings then at my phone. "Its 1:30."
"Then?" He pushed himself off the wall.
"In the morning!" My voice raised in exasperation.
"And so?" He asked with no signs of care.
"I just had a date with-"
"The tall bald dude," Dave finished my sentence in slight irritation.
"It’s just close shave," I retorted back only to finding myself smiling. "Wait. Were you watching?"
"No," defensively he raised his voice only just a little. It was barely noticeable but I knew David well. His hands are already in his pockets and I know what he will do next. Slowly I walked towards him with my hands on my hips, "You were watching earlier, were you?"
"What are you talking about? I've been here minutes ago," Dave tried to play innocent but the evidence is already showing: His forearms have hardened. He always does that whenever he balls his hands in a fist to allow him to lie better like his tension travelled to his fingers.
I chose to ignore this adorable attempt to hide his jealously, "No wonder you sent that message just before he was going to kiss me."
"That was just a coincidence," he shrugged his shoulders to brush the grin on my face. Instead it just grew wider. "As if!" I spat.
He looked at me straight in the eye then looked down and laughed humorlessly, "You are so full of yourself."
"Then why did you text me?"
"I want to ask you for coffee."
"Really? Of all times?" I tilt my head to the side
"Yea. I want to ask you for coffee," his expression never changed.
I shot a glare at him, "Say ‘I want to ask you for coffee’ one more time. I dare you."
He really laughed this time. It was a genuine laughter that crinkles his eyes and melts my heart, "So are you coming or not?"
"Fine," I gave in. I bent down to reach the heel of my shoe to yank it out of my feet then did the same to the other, "But I am not wearing shoes."
Dave squints his eyes and looks at me like it was the silliest thing to say, "Who says you're gonna need them?" He smiles afterwards implying that be was only teasing me. "Just wait outside the building," he told me before he walked out.
He came back riding on a black motorcycle and stopped outside of my building. "Are you kidding me?" He only replied with a raised brow and a taunting smile.
"I don't my legs can spread that wide," I gave him a sly smile as if to imply something else. What I said is true though. This body hugging dress will either become a blouse or show my underwear around Manila.
He laughs again. Oh how I love his laugh. I remember telling him it’s too audible to be written in a cartoon bubble. "I don't think you need to," His eyes lit up to mine with the remaining glow from his laughter.
I stepped downstairs, feeling the cold rough concrete under my bare feet. "Just drive slow ok?" I warned him and glanced at my fingers gripping on my nude strappy heels
"Of course. I just borrowed this from my friend."
I stopped my steps just behind his motorcycle; I was about to sit on his left side but I was caught off guard. “What happened to your motorcycle?” I curiously asked, walking closer.
He wore the black and grey motorcycle helmet, “I sold it years ago.” He handed me another helmet.
I tucked my hair and slide my head in the helmet. “Why?” I sat on the motorcycle with my legs swept to the side. It was almost like I am riding a horse during a supposed coronation. I snorted myself with that image in disgust.
“I was about to do something huge,” he replied vaguely then he looked at me behind his shoulder. “You ready?”
“Almost,” I wiggled to let myself comfortably on my seat then immediately wrapped my arms around his waist. He stiffened when my skin come contact on his shirt. It just beguiles me on what his reaction was underneath.
*~NF~*
Let me just get this straight. I will never admit this to him out loud ever. There was only a little amount of time for me to savor those 9 minutes of the motorcycle ride with him. I tried to calm myself down and regulate my breathing to reduce any obviously sensations of my heart drumming on his back. This happened many time before, when I was young, stupid and naive. He finds it comforting when I do that at 18 but not this time.
It wasn’t weeks ago when he friend zoned me twice. Twice I tell you. The first was 5 years ago when we were hanging out in my house then spilled that he has a girlfriend. And, don’t even get me started on the second time he did.
I can’t predict what is going on this idiot’s mind: he comforts me after he apologizes, he cooks me breakfast the next morning, and he even hugged me when I slept. Well, the last one I was not sure if it happened. Still, his instability drives me insane. Just when I thought I have figured him out, he comes back to throw cold water on my heart. This is just what I hate about him. He makes me feel like I am playing according to his plan.
David finally slows down until he parks on the parking lot behind the fast food chain. “We’re here,” he announces to me after he removes his helmet.
"Really? You pestered me into having coffee with you in a fast food chain?" I couldn’t help but to hide my frustration while removing this stupid helmet off my head.
"Well we are friends," Dave emphasized the word 'are'. I knew he is mocking me from what I said earlier.
I blew a lock of hair on the side of my face. “Even Lance brings me to decent places,” I mumbled to myself.
“That’s because he likes you,” he nudges me playfully with his elbow.
“So?”
He sensed that I didn’t understand him fully so he added, “I meant more than friends.” I noticed that he enjoys rubbing whatever point he says in.
“That’s impossible,” I scoffed at him
“Emery, I’m older than you by 5 years. I could tell you how it’s obvious he likes you more than you know.”
"But isn't this a bit cliché?" I attempted to change the topic which he just laughed it off but went along with it.
“Cliches are my strong point,” he charmingly replies.
I just rolled my eyes, “Everything is your strong point: Your voice, clichés, goodbyes-“
“Goodbyes were never my strong point. It never has,” his voice cuts me off with a tinge of sadness.
“You owe me a cheeseburger and fries with that coffee,” I gave his shoulder a quick tap on his shoulder before I picked a table outside of the fast-food chain. The view overlooks the lit street with the passing cars unfortunate to travel at this time. I pulled my dress again to guard my legs on the imprint these chairs will give then I rested my elbows on the cold metal surface of the table.
Later he arrived with two large fries, two cups of coffee, a cheeseburger and many packets of sugar, creamer, and ketchup. “Thanks. I am starving,” I peeled the wrapping on the burger and took a bite.
“You didn’t eat on your date?” He opens the lid of his cup of coffee
“I did but you can hardly call it food,” I told him after swallowing.
“What did you order?” He grabbed a packet of sugar.
“A couple blowjobs,” I bluntly replied, earning a sound of a crunchy rip. I shifted my eyes to see the packet ripped right at the middle. His slightly widened eyes made the corners of my mouth curl in an amused smirk. “And calamares,” I added.
That last statement I said left a long awkward silence. The only thing that can be heard would be the mumbling of some hangover group a couple tables before us and a couple cars with sounds oozing out their speakers. I just decide to fill my stomach with food to fill the silence. I seem to be doing this a lot whenever I am around him.
“What do friends talk about?” David uses the stirrer to mix the creamer and sugar he just dumped in his cup.
“Just random things,” I nibbled on my fries.
He pulls the cup to his face and blew on it to cool, "Ok. What are your likes?"
I winced, "You are seriously going to start with that?" He just nodded.
"I enjoy a cup of coffee and watching fireworks," I pushed the packet of ketchups to the right corner of the tray.
“Why do you enjoy watching fireworks?” He places the cup down.
“Its like watching magic in the sky,” I sighed, just imagining those lights in the sky leaves me breathless.
“Dislikes?”
“People watching people sleep,” I stared at him dead in the eye as he suppressed a smile.
"What is it with people watching people sleep? I mean body glitter did that and that shit is creepy." I took the last few bites of my cheeseburger.
Dave looked at the net covering above us that is useless when it rains, “I think it’s because we spent our lives being stressed that when we find just a little bit of peace, we could not help but capture that sight with our own eyes. You know?"
“So how are you?” I tried to change the subject.
“You are seriously going to start with that?” He mimicked me.
I grinned, “Yes.”
“I’m a bit tired,” he gave a satisfied sigh. “I just played basketball with my brothers.”
“Kuya Joe came back from Australia?” I asked before taking a sip of my coffee. David told me all about his siblings years ago and one of them Is Joseph Paul who works in Australia as a Civil Engineer.
He had that reminiscing smile on his face, “He did. That’s why we couldn’t say no when he invited us to play basketball.”
“Well, this is actually a good time to catch up. How’s the family? I haven’t heard from them since…” I paused. I didn’t really want to pry the subject to the past again yet it always goes around.
“5 years ago,” he nodded in acknowledgement. “I know.’
“So?” I was really looking forward into hearing any news about them. Dave used to tell me all about it. He was the youngest of 9 siblings and had two dads.
He took a deep breathe, “Let’s start with the eldest. Ate Vie’s flower shop is going well. They did say it was fate when she met her husband in Baguio and now she has so many supplies of flowers.’ He once told me about her: she is the toughest one of the family. Ate Vivian didn’t go to college and had multiple jobs to help their mother, who became a widow when she was 9.
“Kuya Marcus teaches in a well-known university and you already know about Kuya Joe,” he bits the packet of ketchup open then squeezes it in the small container.
“Of course,” I sipped on my coffee.
“Ate Noelle is still single but very dedicated in her job, Kuya IJ finally got married, Ate Grace also got married when she was in Europe, Kuya Gab is already preparing for his wedding next year, and that leaves with Anthony who is still afraid of commitments.”
“Your mom?”
He dips a fry in ketchup, “She’s enjoying her time with her grand kids.”
I paused, trudging carefully on my next question, “How about your father?”
“We’re good. Thanks to you actually,” he pulls a tissue then wipes the corners of his mouth.
I smiled at the thought. When I met him, he told me how much he hated his father who left them when Dave was only 7. His father just vanished then years later, Dave found out that his father married a rich widow and started a family. I remember persuading him to just talk to his father and tell him how he feels instead of leaving loose ends. I never knew it would work since he stormed out before even hearing his father’s reply.
“I’m glad to know,” I smiled kindly.
“What’s up with your shoes?” He folded his arms on his chest.
I lifted my shoes from the ground for him to see, “You mean these old things?”
Softly he shook his head. “No, I mean the one you bruised my foot with,” he poured his fries on the tray.
I laughed at the memory of his reaction when I stepped on his foot. “My brother gave them to me,” I smiled nostalgically. “I was really doing well at my job in a newspaper company but my parents and my brother grew worried. They noticed that I have become cynic. It might have been because of my line of work but I think it goes way past that. What Kuya Eman did is he gave me a dare, to quit my job and try working in a Bridal magazine. If I did then he’ll give me a surprise after I got accepted.”
“So that’s how it became Emerald Jane de Asis’ iconic blue shoes?” Dave teased me before taking another sip on his coffee.
“I always wanted to buy it and it was so expensive,” I argued in my defense. “When I got it, I was so happy. In order for me to not quit my job so quickly, those shoes give me motivation and also to remind me that I am also the reason why Kuya Eman and his girlfriend had the biggest fight.”
“Why?” Dave was intrigued.
“Ate Cat thought it was for her and when their monthsary rolled, he only gave her a bouquet of roses. She thought he was cheating on her so they had to cool off,” I poured my fries mixing it with his.
“Why didn’t your brother just tell her about it?” he pulled 3 pieces of fries.
“We've grown really close. You can say we’re like sisters but she has a blabbermouth.”
“And?”
“He had to wait for a confirmation from the company that I got the job before he could tell her everything. To spare him from trouble, I called her and told her that Kuya Eman just gave me the blue shoes I always wanted as a present for getting the job,” I tucked a hair behind my ear, exposing my silver earing.
“And they live happily ever after?”
“Hopefully,” I add. I placed the cup on the table then glazed my eyes on him, “Did you know that I almost fought for you?”
“Where did that come from?” His eyes slightly widened.
I shrugged my shoulders, “I don’t know. Just wanted to get it out of my chest because were friends. The least we could do is being honest.”
I rested my head on the palm of my hand, elbows on the table. “Are you ok?” He places his hand on my other hand on the table with my fingers hooked on my cup. I chose to ignore that good surged of shiver down my spine.
“Just tired. You did drag me here at this time,“ I laughed weakly.
My eyes were closed; I heard the sound of his chair moving close to me, the metal legs softly scraping on the concrete until I felt his presence beside me. “Hey,” I opened my eyes.
“Hmm?”
“You can rest your head on my shoulder if you want,” I just stared at him. This guy really just leaves me confuse. I cannot tell if he’s being friendly or finding a way to be intimate. In the end, I chose to ignore the nagging thought at the back of my mind. I am slightly tired and I need this.
I scooted closer and rested my head on his shoulder; it felt uncomfortable at first because the angle of my head on his shoulder is straining my neck. He moved his arm and wrapped it around my shoulder then he sat straighter so my head is now leaning on his chest. Ah! It feels so…
“It feels good, doesn’t it?’ He smugly asks as if there was only one answer I could say. Well then David, I take it back. It doesn’t feel good. It feels like… It feels like… Actually it feels good. Another thing I cannot admit it to him honestly.
His heat his radiating from his body and the muscles on his chest is not too developed so my head doesn’t feel like it’s resting on a punching back. I like him like this: his arms are firm and he has add a little weight since before in his early 20s.
“I’m glad you didn’t fight for me,” he broke the silence. “Even so, why didn’t you?” I can feel his warm breath on my forehead.
I didn’t want to look at him so I just closed my eyes. “I assumed I was just the right mistake. That in your love story I wasn’t the love interest rooted for. Maybe I was just the other girl designed for you and Bianca to grow stronger than before,” I softly confessed.
“I understand how you feel,” my head elevated with the gradual rise and fall of his chest.
“No you don’t,” I coldly replied.
“I do,” he emphasized firmly then sighs. “You don’t know what Bianca did to me?”
Well, isn’t this interesting. “What?” I raised my head to meet his eyes.
“Months after we got engaged,’ I felt my chest constrict. The possibility of him sharing a future with Bianca hurts even by today. “She dumped me.”
“Really?” I laughed bitterly at what he said.
“Yea. She left me for her best friend,” he stroked his thumb under his jaw. “It turns out she was just waiting for him all this time. That got me thinking, ‘Was I just an obstacle for the real thing?’”
“Life’s shitty,” I concluded.
He pondered for a moment then his arm around me grew tight. Unconsciously I avoided his eyes. “It is but you can see that life being shitty is what shapes us and look, “he lifted my chin to stare at my eyes. “We found each other. Two people who share a shitty past facing an unknown future of possibilities.”
“As always, your optimism is irritating as always,” I snuggled into his chest in search for warmth. It’s getting kind of cold.
“Get used to it. I am not the friend that will drag you down, he adds another arm around me, enveloping me in an embrace.”
“You’re annoying,” I smiled at him.
“Then I am just the person you need,” he messes with my hair.
I slapped his hand on my head then stick my tongue out, “In your dreams dipshit.”
“You know I am right,” again with his arrogance.
“I hate you,” I muttered to him.
“And I know you that you don’t mean that.”
I never did David.