I was 14 and he was 13.
That was the first time my heart pounded so hard for a guy.
He was well built, hindi mo siya mapagkakamalan na nasa ganoong edad na siya, compared to other boys at his age he was already standing 5'4. He was lean, a little bit masculine, and most of all he has this pretty deep hollows on his cheeks that girls would probably swoon over every time he flashes a smile.
"Driana, this is your Tita Lorna's son, Erickson Jace. He's going to stay here for a week muna, walang tao sa house nila since your Tita Lorna and Tito Gavin is going out of town for some matter, kaya pinaiwan muna siya satin. By the way, Erickson I want you to meet my daughter Adriana" I saw him smile and greeted me with a hi.
"Okay children, I'm going to leave for work na. Manang?!" Manang Fely immediately responded and went to my mom.
"Manang, please guide Erickson to his room. Pakitulungan din siya sa pag-aayos ng gamit." Napatango naman si Manang Fely.
"Okay. Please behave ha?" Humalik ako sa pisngi ni mommy and then bid her goodbye.
"Tara na" dala ang iba pang mga bag ni Erickson, Manang Fely lead the way. Tahimik lang kaming nakasunod sa likod niya.
"Hi Driana, how old are you?" Nagulat ako nang bigla siyang magsalita. I focused on him and saw him tilting his head waiting for my response. I blushed at his gesture.
"I'm 14" mahina kong sagot.
"Oh so you're a year older than me. Should I address you ate?" My eyes widen at that statement.
"What?! No!" I heard him chuckling, I felt my blood rushing to my face. Was I a little bit exaggerated?
"Okay Driana." I smiled.
We finally reached his temporary room, it was two doors away from mine. Manang Fely immediately unloaded his baggages.
"Let me help you with that manang" he was about to reach for his bags when manang stopped him from doing it.
"Naku, iho ako ng bahala dito, mas mabuti pang mag-ikot ka muna dito sa bahay. Nandiyan naman si Yana para samahan ka" He shifted his gaze on me.
"Yana?" He looked at me with confusion.
"Ahm, that's Manang Fely's nickname for me." His mouth formed an 'O' after hearing my words.
"If your mom calls you Driana and Yana by Manang Fely, I want a different name too, hmmm I'll call you Ria" my face literally heated that time. No one called me Ria in the past, and his the first person to derive that from my name, and it sounds so divine!
"If that's what you want" I said a little bit shy.
We toured around the house after that.
"So where do you study?" I watched him wander his eyes around, and then finally settling it to mine.
"Montessori" my mouth gaped open.
"What campus?"
"Manila"
"Really? I'm in Montessori De Manila as well, but I haven't seen you even once there." He snapped his fingers and lifted his hand to his chin.
"Hmm, that's because I'm busy with my palarong pambansa trainings, and I come to class at exact time, so I really don't have the time to stroll around the campus. It's either I'm at the gymnasium or room" my eyes widen in amusement, but feeling a little regretful for not noticing him around the school, I mean how can I take my eyes off for someone as handsome as him?
"Wow, you're playing for palarong pambansa? What sports are you into?" I asked. I want to have a longer conversation with him, I want to know more about him.
"Volleyball" I was not really into sports, that's why I do not have any idea what standing does every member of the team has.
"Can I watch your trainings when summer starts? I want to know more about volleyball" he happily nodded and my heart just can't take the overwhelming feeling every time I see his face lits up.
WE'VE BEEN TOGETHER FOR A WEEK, and we grew closer as friends. He talked about anything funny or even saddest in the past, and so do I. We played random card board games, video games or physical games at the yard. A week of being together felt knowing each other's existence. We've shared secrets and experiences.
And I thought that was all.
"Hey, Ria." I looked at him and smiled. His back was leaning against the trunk. His reading a manga book which he bought from NBS.
"What is it?" I saw him settled at his seat, and became a little bit uncomfortable and restless afterwards.
"Hey? Why are you suddenly acting like that?" I saw him being hesitant.
"I know this will be the first time that I'm going to disclose a different kind of secret to you." He looked doubtful and embarrassed at the same time.
"You know Beatrice?" My heart started to beat erratically hearing another girl's name from him.
"The famous singer in school. W-what about her?" I was having a hint on what he was about to say, but I was still hoping that it's not.
"Keep this a secret for me okay? I-I think I love her" I felt my heart stopped a beat.
"B-but why her?" I felt the lump in my throat building up.
"Who wouldn't fall for her? She's kind and talented. I've only talked to her once, but she already caught my attention. I've been having this feelings for a very long time" My dreams of having him shattered, he's been long in love on someone else.
"How can you say that you love her?" I just can't accept the idea, I mean why? Why?
"I don't know, but whenever I see her around my heart starts to stir up crazily, you know that feeling? that feeling that your heart wants to explode out of your ribs any second. I also can't get her off of my head to the point that I can even see her with my eyes shut, I can live listening to her voice eternally. I... I just can't contain this overwhelming feeling with just the idea of thinking of her" he said, looking engrossed.
"Isn't that such a big word to describe your feelings? I-I mean, maybe your just confused. Baka you're infatuated lang talaga?" I saw his eyebrows knotted.
"No, I know what my feelings are and this is love. Is it just me or do you really sound so opposed?" I saw him frown more. I composed myself, and gave him an awkward smile.
"N-no, I'm not opposing anything. It's just that, aren't we too young for those stuffs?" I crossed my fingers. He looks dejected and sulky. He brought his eyes back on the book then continued reading.
"I guess there's nothing wrong about that, hindi ko naman sinabing manliligaw ako. That's why when the right time comes, I'm going to pursue her." I was protesting mentally. I felt my heart literally shattered.
How can someone steal my chances of having this guy with me? I know it's mean to think wicked things to somebody, but I can't help it.
I grew feelings of insecurity towards her.
So this is what my bitchy classmates felt for their boyfriends, jealousy.
However, I knew my situation is way different from them. I can't just tell him what I felt for him. We're friends and I can't let this closeness slip against me, I'm afraid that he might choose to stay away from me once he knew.
"I'm keeping this with you since your my best friend okay? Let's be open with each other from now on"
I kept a smile even if it stings. I kept my smile even if I was in the verge of crying.
My first love and my first heartbreak happened in a week. Just like how fast time passes-by between us.
____________
Dear Erick,
The first time I saw your orbs that gleam,
I instantly fell from this love sick rim,
Your eyes are the vast sea that swallows,
And I'm a boat on the waves that follows,
Shallow it might be, but why am I sinking?
Cut me deep with your lips, without you knowing,
You sealed me in this aggressive current,
Then zipped me with this emotional torrent.