I couldn't think of anything else but Adam. It was as if though he had taken over everything: my heart, mind, body and soul. It was coming up to a year since me and Adam got together. Since then we met every morning before school, during lunch and after school. I always made the excuse that I had an after school club. On weekends I would tell my parents that I was going to the library to study for my exams and I would meet him. Meeting Adam never got in the way of my studies though, I was a bright girl and gave it my all during class and made sure I didn't let my relationship with Adam affect my work. One thing however had been affected; my relationship with Aruna. It was strange but it seemed as if though she wasn't happy with us being together. At first I tried my best to keep her happy and spend time with her but as time went by our friendship weakened. It was like she wasn't interested anymore. When I see her now we just nod to one another as if though we are acknowledging one another's presence. It upsets me to lose her, we were inseparable after all. I know it's selfish but I had Adam now and to be honest I couldn't imagine a second without him.
It was our first anniversary since we got together. Adam gave me a beautiful pearl necklace with matching earrings. "I love you so much, I just want to spend every second of the day with you" I could sit and stare at him all day. The year had gone by so quickly but it was the most amazing one I had ever experienced. Everything was so special, so magical. During the past year I had learnt one thing and I was more sure about this than I had ever been about anything else; I wanted to spend the rest of my life with him.
"You thought we wouldn't find out?" "How long has this been going on for?" "How could you do this to us". My world came crashing down. Mr Patel shook his head from side to side and walked out of the door. He had seen Adam and I in the park. Mr Patel was a member of the committee at our local temple. Alongside my parents, he too was a devout Hindu and felt it was his duty to tell my parents that I was dating a Muslim boy. My mother sat on the edge of the sofa and my father came towards me like thunder on a dark night. "How long has this been going on I asked? How far have you gone with him" tears ran down my face, I felt ashamed for all the lies I had told them this past year. "I...I..a year, we haven't done anything for you to be embarrassed about" "Embarrassed? embarrassed? I am ashamed of you, how will I ever face anyone again? My daughter with a Muslim boy. Did you not once think of us? All the lies and all the deceit" "It's not like that" I went to mum and held her hand. She avoided my gaze and looked the other way. "Mum..I love him". Mum slapped me across the face. I was distraught, surely they loved me enough to accept my choice? What sin had I committed? "You are NEVER EVER to see him again" my father stormed up the stairs and mum followed him. I weeped, my heart broken. I loved him, I was happy, could they not see that? Why did religion have to come in the way? There is no religion in love, why couldn't they accept that. I was 17, not a child.
There was no way out. It seemed as if though I was in a dark tunnel, all my own and there was no light at the end of it. I couldn't sleep, eat or focus on my studies. My parents had taken away my phone. It had been exactly two weeks since they had found out about Adam. Mum would walk me to school and wait at the gates for me at the end of school. During lunch my father would stand outside the gate and if he couldn't make it my eldest brother Ajit would. My dad hadn't spoken to me since that day. I once tried to leave school during lunch only to see my dad standing there, a stern and frightful look on his face. After school my mum would make me walk the longer route back home so that we would not see Mr Ali's shop.
"Why don't you just walk out and see him?"
"Wow your parents are harsh, Alex is always around at mine, mum and dad have no problem with it". No one in school understood, I had no one to talk to. My white friends were completely oblivious of the connotations of dating outside my religion and that too with a Muslim boy. My father and brother had made it clear that I was never to speak to Adam or to even attempt to see him. My brother threatened to 'break his legs' if he was caught anywhere near me. To some it may seem extreme, but in my culture and in my religion it was as clear as black and white. I had crossed all boundaries and forgiveness would not come easily.
Weeks past and those weeks turned into months. I heard from a friend that Adam was in Pakistan. He had been sent there by his dad after my father visited him to tell him about us and to threaten, that if he wanted the safety of his son it would be advisable for Adam not to be seen around here. His dad had sent him miles away to keep him safe and to keep him away from me. I don't know if Adam put up a fight or even if he attempted to see me. I was cut off from everything, closed from the outside world.
I wrapped the scarf around my neck. Adam had given me this just before my parents found out. It was freezing and Adam wrapped his scarf around me. It smelt of him, it still had his fragrance. I kissed the scarf and tears ran down my cheeks. I was overwrought and wanted to run, I wanted to scream. I was helpless. I stood by the bed feeling diffident and abashed. There really was no way out.
A year passed and it was my 18th birthday. "What would you like for you birthday" my sister asked? "Adam" she sighed and gave me a tight hug. My sister was the only one who had been there for me. She was in India when it all happened and came back a few months later. She had been my rock. My father was still angry with me.
My mother spoke to me and I felt as if though she somewhat felt my pain but was forced not to relay it to me because of dad. "You need to forget him sis, it's been a year. He's probably over you" I refused to believe it, we were strong, unbreakable. Deep down I knew he was suffering like me. I prayed for his safety everyday, I knew what my brother was capable of. I just couldn't get him out of my mind. Adam's thought had taken control of me and I could see nothing but him.