Imani
"Slow down."
It's my fault I shouldn't trust him.
"Slow down, Imani."
I should have known he was a spy.
"IMANI BREAKS!"
I snapped out of it and quickly press hard on the breaks before I rear-end the car in front of me.
"Eish!," Dad yelled. My heart is pounding in shock. This is the second time I almost crashed into a car. "Pull over," He said. I slowly pull over the car to the side of the road. Dad started to teach me how to drive. Today is my second lesson and ever since my dream I haven't been able to focus. I keep thinking about what my mother said.
Dad took deep breaths before he turned to speak to me.
"Imani, What is going on?" He asked. "You almost killed us. This isn't a joke. I need you to focus on the directions I give you. I am doing this for you and you haven't listened to anything I said for the past hour." He says. I look down at the string wheel in shame.
"If you are not ready it's okay." He said in a soft tone.
"I'm sorry. I just---"
"What is Imani? You haven't been acting like yourself lately. Are you okay?" He asks full of concern. I don't know if I should tell him about my dreams.
"Dad I--I had a dream a few days ago." I said feeling nervous.
"What kind of dream?" He asks.
"About mom," I said looking up to look at me.
"Your mother?" He said confused. "What happend in this dream?" He said getting more curious.
"Well I was in this open plan and there was a huge tree with many white wolves around it. One of the wolves approached me and turned into mom." Dad's eyes widen in shock.
"She was crying and saying sorry she was and that she wanted me to meet you, but she didn't want to put the pack at risk," I said.
"Is that all?" He asked.
"No, she also said something about a spy--"
"What!" Dad yelled causing me to jump in shock. "Imani please tell me everything you remember in that dream every detail." He said getting closer.
"S--She mention a spy and how she shouldn't have trusted him."
"Who?" He said putting his hands on my shoulder.
"I--I don't know I am confused too. I never had a dream like this before. I am not even sure if that was actually my mother." I said. Dad lets go of me and leans back in his seat.
"Oh, my gosh," He said shaking my head. "I can't believe this."
"What?" I said confused. "Dad, do you know what this dream means?" I asked.
"Sweetie I am going to tell you something and I need you to listen to me very carefully okay." He said and I nod my head understanding.
"I think your memories may have been eased or rewritten." He said.
"Because just like Eric's story your story has a few holes that don't make sense. And I was thinking of getting a witch to tap into your mind so we can visually see your memories and find if there are suppress memories or rewritten memories." He said.
I listen carefully to what he is telling me. I am a little shocked that could be a possibility. I never thought something would be wrong with my memories. But remembering my dream I can see how they could make sense because I didn't understand anything she was saying. I was thinking that maybe it wasn't real because I remember my mother and childhood a little different than the dream I saw.
"What do you think?" Dad asked me.
I took a deep breath before answering. "Honestly I am not sure. I feel a little scared and nervous to think someone could be able to go into my head."
"Well if it helps it would be me. As an alpha, I have the power to do that with the help of a witch." He said.
"Can I have some time to think about this please?" I asked.
"Of course there is no rush." He said.
"Have you done this with Eric?" I asked. At that moment dad's facial expression changed.
"Dad!" I yelled in shock. "When did this happen?" I asked.
"Imani listen---"
"Wait--" I said thinking. "Was this when you took him into custody?" I asked.
"Yes, and I had to Imani. He was a rogue wolf in my territory and he attacked me. I had to make sure he was telling the truth and he wasn't going to be a threat to my pack." He said in a deep tone.
"Now with you, it's different because you are my daughter. I am giving you the choice. You don't have to go through with it if you don't feel comfortable." He said.
The thought that my memories could have been altered scares me. What if everything I know is a lie again? I don't know how many hidden truths I can take.
What if I find something scarier than being a werewolf?
"What did you find in Eric's memory?" I asked. Dad looks away from me faces the road.
"Nothing too out of the ordinary but enough to question him." He says.
"Like what?" I asked confused at his answer.
"Like how your mother would allow a rogue wolf to be in charge of protecting you. I fought your mother would do something like that. And also how he doesn't have any memory of his parents or life before he met you and your mother. I understand his pack was slaughtered, but there has to be something he would have remembered that day since it was a traumatic experience." He said.
"And also how he is able to fight better than all my top tire wolfs for someone who wasn't raised in a pack is also alarming. That's why I also think maybe the memories I saw in his mind may not be real." He said.
I understand what dad is saying but at the same time, I can't help but feel the need to defend Eric. Every time someone questions him and his past I always find the need to be defensive.
"Why would his memories be altered? and who would want that?" I asked. "Like you said he is a rogue wolf of a rare breed. I don't see the reason why someone would want to do that?" I said.
Dad took a deep breath before he spoke "Sweetheart I understand how you feel and trust me I feel the same way. But there are so many things that are not adding up. Why as soon as Eric came to our territory there was been a huge increase in hunter attacks?" He said. I didn't have an answer.
"I am the alpha of this pack. And you are my daughter. It is my job to keep everyone safe. I took an oath and so did you. Eric is an outsider like it or not and I am checking every possibility and if I am wrong I will admit it." He says.
We decided to drop the conversation because it wasn't going to end anywhere. I told him I would think more about having a witch look into my memories. I don't think I'll be ready. Because I was out of it dad decided to drive us back home. Dad went to work while I stayed home.
Going into the kitchen to find something to snack on I found Benjy spilling out his mom's medicine in the kitchen sink. I laughed once I saw him. He jumped at the sound of my laugh.
"Oh man, I thought you were my mom." He said sighing a breath of relief.
"So you decide to stop drinking them?" I asked going to the fridge.
"Yes, I had enough." He said cleaning his cup and the sink.
"But you know what's crazy. Ever since I stop drinking it I felt much stronger." He says.
"Really?" I said confused. I take out the crab salad Neema made last night and a box of crackers. I take a seat on the island table.
"Yeah, even dad said he has noticed a change in me." Benjy says coming over to me to get a cracker. We dip the cracker into the salad and take a bite.
"Um...So good" Benjy said. I nod my head in agreement. Benjy and I have fallen in love with Neema's cooking. She is the best cook I have ever seen.
"Wasn't that medicine supposed to make you healthy and stronger?" I asked.
"Yeah supposedly but that shit hasn't done anything for me for the past 17 years." He said. I took another cracker and dipped it into the salad.
"Wow, so what have you been doing differently since you stopped taking it?" I asked taking another bite.
"Well, I just started eating more protein, working out with the guys, eating Aunite Neema's food that's it." Benjy answered.
"That sounds normal," I said.
"Yeah it is and I felt stronger and healthier than when I took the medicine two weeks ago." He said. "Dad even said if I keep this up I might even be able to shift." He says getting excited.
"You do smell different," I said.
"Yes, my alpha hormones are finally coming in." He said.
"Have you told your mom?" I asked.
"Hell no if she found out she would up my dosage and start to watch me drink it to make sure I took it." Benjy said shaking his head. "Since she's so busy with the ball she hasn't been able to notice thankfully." He said taking another bite.
"Well, I am happy for you. You look happy and healthy and I can't wait to see your wolf." I said smiling at him.
"I can finally be useful to this pack" He whispered to himself.
Benjy and I continue to talk and finish eating the crab salad. After we cleaned up I went upstairs to my room. I changed into tights and an oversize shirt and sat on the floor with my legs crossed. I closed my eyes and took deep breaths.
Star I called my wolf.
Yes, She answered.
Do you think it will be okay to have a witch look into my memories? I asked wanting to know her opinion.
Although I have always been with you I was very weak during the early stages of your life so I wouldn't be able to help in retaining your memories. She said.
But there is something you should understand Imani. Mawu makes no mistakes. I am strong and together we are stronger. You do not have to be afraid when the Goddess is here to protect us. You come from the strongest pack in the world. There is nothing to be afraid of. She said assuring me.
You are right and I understand what you are saying but that the same time I can't help but feel I am about to open a pandora's box that I am not sure I am ready for. I said.
Well, why don't you ask Mawu for help?
I took a deep breath. Although I don't like talking to Mawu as much because she always leaves me asking more questions Star is right.
I spent the day meditating and praying to Mawu that she would give me guidance and strength. A few hours later it was time for dinner. I took a shower before I went downstairs for dinner. Surprisingly today Oliva came home early and was able to cook dinner. It was an awkward dinner because we all got used to Neema's cooking. Oliva made mash potatoes, stakes, and mixed vegetables which weren't too bad. But I do miss eating the Caribbean and Nigerian food.
"How are the preparations for the ball going mom?" Benjy asked starting the conversation.
"Well, sweetie. This year it's going to be huge." She said smiling. "Oh, honey could you up the budget please. We're going to need a lot more staff this year." She said taking a bite for her stake.
"You can hire volunteers from the pack." Dad answered.
"But we need professional if everything is going to go well. I want this ball to be perfect and plus the Alpha King is coming. I can't just hire anyone." Oliva said.
Dad put his folk and life down to look up at Oliva. "You are already over the budge Oliva. And this is a celebration for our pack. I don't want any outsiders. With the increase of hunter attacks, I can't put our pack at risk especially since the Alpha King is coming." He said letting her know that the conversation isn't up for debate. Oliva looks so angry as she stares down dad.
"Ben I can do back---"
"No," He said and continues to eat.
"How was your driving lesson Imani?" Neema asked changing the subject.
"It was okay," I answered not really wanting to talk about it.
"If you need any help you can ask me," Zoe says.
"Oh, that reminds me. I need you guys to start going shopping for the ball." Said, dad.
"Does it have to be traditional clothing?" Zoe asked.
"No, it doesn't have to be." Dad answered.
We continue to dinner with small talk. Oliva doesn't say anything during the whole dinner.
After dinner, I go to Zoe's room to talk to her about what my wolf and dad said. I wanted to get another person's opinion.
"I think you should always listen to your wolf. Your wolf is apart of you and comes from Mawu. So if your wolf is telling you to do it then I think you should do it. What do you have to lose?" She said.
"Yeah, I know," I said with a sigh. I had a feeling Zoe would say this.
"I know it's scary, but your dad will be there so you are not alone. And think about it this way. You find out the truth will not only help protect you but will help us protect you. We are not alone anymore. Remember the oath we took. The pack has our back." She said coming over to give me a hug. I pulled Zoe away and looked at her up and down.
"What?" She said confused.
"Are you okay?" I asked.
"What?" She said.
"Since when were you team Silver Fang?" I asked confused. Zoe is the last person I would guess to support the pack and to trust them.
"Well since I been spending more time with our grandparents and with Zuri I realize not everyone in the pack is bad. I know it's going to take some time for them to accept me so I thought I should start making an effort to help them warm up to me." She said. I smiled at Zoe feeling so proud of her. She is changing so much. I leaned over and gave her a hug. She wrapped her arm around me and hugged me back.
"I'm so proud of you. And your right." I said. Zoe pat my back.
"When have I ever been wrong?" She said laughing. "And from the looks of it. I could be right about Eric too." I pulled away from the hug.
"You had to ruin the moment," I said with a sigh.
"Listen your dad is right. And I think you should keep an open mind so you won't end up being disappointed." Zoe said.
"Okay, enough about Eric. What are your thoughts on Oliva?" I asked.
"Yeah, I notice dinner was awkward too," She said.
"But isn't it always awkward when she is here?" I said laughing. Zoe smiles.
"True. I wonder what made her want to host the packs anniversary?" She asks.
"Right? after all these years. I don't know maybe she trying to prove herself." I said.
"Well, whatever. I am down for free food anytime." Zoe said. "But anyway I don't know about you but I keep getting the feeling she is up to something. Ever since I came to this house she has been keeping her eyes on me. I can tell she waiting for me to fuck up."
"I wouldn't worry about her. She can't do anything to us. She isn't even my father's mate." I said.
"Do you think she would be cheating?" Zoe asked. I thought about it for a moment.
"Well if you asked me that a month ago I would have said no. But now I wouldn't put it past her." I said. "Also you know she's been making these medicine for Benjy since he was a baby that was supposed to help me with his wolf. And Benjy told me he hasn't taken them for the past two weeks and he was felt healthier and stronger than he as ever felt in his life." I said.
"That's wild!" Zoe said in shock.
"Right!" I said. "And now if I remember correctly that medicine is the same medicine my mom used to make for me too when I was younger," I said remembering.
"Wait---Wasn't your mom giving you suppressors of your wolf?" Zoe said in shock.