The Falcon touches the ground of D'Qar and when Poe and I get out, we are greeted by several Resistance workers who immediately get to work unloading the new supplies. My mother approaches us.
"I assume everything went well?" she asks us, a lingering smile on her lips.
"Yes, general. The supplies are safely in the cargo hold and the locals send us their best," Poe says with a grin, placing his fists on his hips. I stand next to him with folded arms.
Mom looks us over with narrowed eyes. "Are you two okay?" she asks.
"Yeah, why wouldn't we be?" I ask with a nervous chuckle, knowing my mother can see right through me.
"No reason," she answers. "Commander, don't you have some duties to fulfil so I can have a moment alone with my daughter?"
Poe nods. "Yes, absolutely. It was nice talking to you, general. I will see you later," he says, pointing a finger at her before departing. I watch him leave and catch up with some of his pilot friends.
"Are you sure everything's alright with you and Dameron?" Mom asks as we take a walk back to the main base.
"Yes, I'm sure," I say. "I told him about my slip to the Dark Side."
"Really? What did he say?" she asks and I'm happy she let the other subject go.
"He understood. He said he'd drag me back to the Light when I ever even think of turning to the Dark Side again." A soft chuckle passes my lips.
She smiles. "That's good," she says. "It's good to see that you're opening up to people."
I sent her a soft smile as we arrive at the front entrance of the control base. I stop her. "Mom, can I ask you something?"
"Of course, honey."
"Do you ever feel Ben?"
"Through the Force, you mean?"
I nod.
"Yes, more than I'd probably like to." A soft sigh escapes her lips. "I can feel him reach out to me."
"What does he want?" I ask.
She hesitates for a moment before answering my question solemnly, "Nothing."
"Nothing? He doesn't ask anything of you?" I ask sceptically.
She shakes her head softly. "No, I just feel his presence. I always try to talk to him, but he never answers," she says. "Why do you ask?"
"I feel him too," I start, nervously fidgeting with my hands. "But the energy he brings with him always feels hostile. Dangerous. In the beginning, he was trying to find me but now, I think he's trying to turn me to the Dark Side too."
"But that won't happen. Just like Poe told you, he'd bring you right back," she says. "And I think that's something Luke never told you. You need an anchor that'll keep you on the Light Side. Whether that's me, or your dad, or Luke, or even Poe, I need you to find that anchor and hold onto it."
I nod. "I will, and I'm trying to. Somedays, it's just a lot harder than others."
She reaches for my hands, giving them a soft squeeze. "I'm so proud of you, Raven," she says and although I don't know why, tears well up in my eyes. I pull her in a hug.
"Thank you, Mom," I say softly. "I love you."
***
"Raven! Hey, Rave!" Poe jogs up to me and I look up from my book on the traditional Jedi temples. I mark the page and close the book, placing it on my lap. All afternoon, I've been outside, soaking up whatever sunlight I can before we're going on another supply trip tomorrow. This time, we're going to the outer rim to get fuel for the X-Wings.
"Hey," I say with a smile and he sits down in the grass in front of me, excitedly rubbing his hands together. "You okay?"
"Yes, I'm great. I just talked to your mom and she allowed us to stop by Kashyyyk on our way back to see how they're doing over there," he says with an excited grin.
"Poe," I start with a chuckle.
"What? Aren't you excited? It'll just be the two of us for a few days," he says, looking around before taking my hands in his.
I sigh. "I know that, and that sounds amazing, but we can't keep doing this. We're lying to everyone, including my mother, the general of the Resistance," I say, drawing my hands back and sticking them under my arms instead.
"So yesterday you were confessing your undying love for me and now you want nothing to do with me?" he asks, raising a brow.
I stare at him for a second, unsure of how to react. "Okay, first of all, I didn't confess my undying love for you," I say. "Second of all, it's not that I want nothing to do with you. It is forbidden for me to form attachments, let alone be with someone. I'm just saying that if we decide to do this." I motion between him and myself. "We have to really think it through. We'd be living a lie."
He sighs softly, lowering his gaze. "I get it, I do," he says. "But I think we can make this work."
"I don't know, Poe... It wouldn't be a normal relationship."
"That's because we aren't normal people. I'm a Resistance pilot, you're a Jedi Knight. We're not meant to be normal, Rave." He reaches for my hands again and this time, I don't pull back. "We can try this. If it doesn't work, it doesn't work. But we have to try."
My jaw clenches shortly before I look up. "If we try this, we have to do everything we can to keep it to ourselves. No one can know, especially my mom."
"I couldn't agree more," he states. "But that won't be a problem when we get to Kashyyyk."
I giggle softly. "Probably not," I agree. "But still."
"Yeah, no, I know," he says.
"I should get back to my book, I almost finished my chapter on the original Jedi knighting ceremony," I say, patting the cover of my book.
"Yeah, you're right. I should be getting back to work, anyway," he says, softly squeezing my hands before getting up, not forgetting to send me a wink when he walks away.
I dive back into my book and the next hour or so, I'm lost in the words on the page. I soak up as much information I can and even scribble a few notes on the pages. Master Skywalker would reprimand me for writing in old Jedi texts but considering he and I are the last of the Jedi, I think I can get away with it.
Aide, one of the Resistance workers and one of my few friends here in the Resistance, comes up to me. "You and Dameron have gotten close over the past few days," she comments, a thick accent lacing her words. She sits down next to me and plucks at the grass.
"Yeah, well. He's a good friend." I shrug.
"I bet," she says with a chuckle.
"What's that supposed to mean?" I ask amusedly.
"He definitely is a good friend." She sends me a wink. "He was my friend once."
I feel my blood rush to my cheeks and I quickly duck my head. "I don't know what you're talking about it," I mutter.
"It's not important," she says. "Anyway, I heard you were going to Kashyyyk?"
"Yeah, we're gonna check on the situation there. We haven't heard from them in a while," I say.
"Should be fun," she says. "You, Dameron and Chewbacca."
I shoot up. "What?"
"Chewbacca is coming too, didn't you know that? He told me this morning that he's very excited to visit his home planet again," she says. "Surely your mom told you."
I open my mouth only to close it again, thinking carefully of my choice of words. "No, she didn't. She probably forgot to mention it," I mutter, pulling at the sleeves of my robes.
"Well, I'm sure it'll be great. I wish I could come, but the admiral needs me here," she says. "Anyway, have fun. I'll see you when you get back!"
"Yeah, see you!" I say, offering a smile. Once I'm sure she can't see me anymore, I let out a groan. This is gonna be harder than we thought.