(A/N: Hey all, I just wanted to put a big TRIGGER WARNING on this chapter! The character has a mental breakdown, and there are descriptions of violence! It's a depiction of my character's stay at Arkham Asylum and is a delve into mental health, which could be triggering to some people! So I just wanted to put the TRIGGER WARNING on this chapter!)
*Five Years Ago*
After days of tracking the Joker's location, I finally found him! The old Sionis Steel Mill. I should have looked there first. I broke through the window of the office. He wasn't in here. I looked down into the main area. His thugs were there, but not him. I turned and went through the doors, into another area of the building. There he was. I growled. He would PAY for taking Jason away from me!!!! My biological Father turned around, smiling as usual.
"Ace! So nice to see you! I hear you've gone through a lot of trouble to find me! Why the rush, kiddo? It's not like you've got a boyfriend to save anymore!" He said, laughing. That hurt. It hurt me badly. But, I reigned in my temper, temporarily.
"Where is he?" I asked.
"I don't know who you're talking about." He said, laughing again. I was beginning to lose control.
"MY BOYFRIEND!! MY FIANCE!! MY JASON!!!" I screamed. There were tears pouring from my eyes. "I want his body!! I want my boyfriend's body!" I yelled. He began laughing again.
"Oh, sorry kiddo. I've already burned his body, and spread his ashes who knows where!" He began laughing. I saw red.
"No...No!!!!" I screamed, and tackled him, beating the Joker as hard as I could, cursing him, cursing everything. I thought I was actually going to beat him and be able to lock him in Arkham forever. I underestimated him. As I pulled back to punch him again, he used the flower on his lapel, and sprayed my right eye with acid!! I screamed and fell back, holding my eye. He stood, laughing as usual.
"I must say, Ace, you have learned a lot from Bats! But not enough!" He said, and I saw him grab a crowbar! I curled in on myself, as he started beating the crap out of me with it. I had made the same mistake Jason did. I went after the Joker, alone, and then I underestimated him. I tried to fight back, but he had the upper hand.
"My name isn't Ace!!" I growled.
"Oh, but it is! No matter how much you try to deny it, you are mine! You belong to me, you ARE me! At least, you will be!" He laughed. "You should have stayed with me, Ace. If you had, your little birdy would still be here!" He stopped beating me, but I was so weak, I couldn't take the opportunity. "You must feel horrible. Ol' Bats must hate you!" He said. I shook my head.
"No...no, it wasn't my fault!" I cried. He laughed, as he went at me with the crowbar again.
"Oh, but it is! Jason is gone, and it's all your fault!" He kept saying things like that, and it was destroying me! By the time he decided to stop, I was barely holding myself together. "Well, I suppose Bats will be here soon to save you. I'll just leave him a little surprise for when he gets here!" He dropped something on the ground, and walked out of the room. I slowly turned my head. He had left a bomb! It was going to go off in five seconds!! My eyes widened. I quickly grabbed it, and threw it away from me. Unfortunately, I wasn't paying attention to where I threw it, and it exploded on the ceiling. Debris fell on me, including a huge slab of the roof, crushing my right leg. I screamed in pain. I couldn't move. I was left alone with only my thoughts, and they weren't great. I could still hear his laugh in my head! I don't know how long it was, but soon, someone was moving the debris off of me.
"Rowan!" I looked up. Dad and Dick were here! Dad finally moved the debris off of my leg. As soon as it was gone, I curled in on myself. "Rowan, Sis, are you alright?!" Dick asked. I couldn't even register that he was there.
"Joker...Jason...not my fault...it's not my fault...I'm not like you..." I was shaking and sobbing, I wasn't holding myself together at all.
"Bruce, this isn't good. I think she's breaking down." Dick said.
"How bad? Is it something we can help her with?" He asked. Dick lightly touched my shoulder. I screamed and thrashed around. Dick jumped back, then sighed.
"No. I think seeing what happened to Jason and being tortured by Joker is making her break down completely. Bruce...she needs to go to Arkham." He said. Dad's face hardened.
"Absolutely not. I'm not putting her in there." He said, and gently helped me stand. I was limping out, however, I stopped. "Rowan?" He gently asked.
"No...no, leave me alone!! My name isn't Ace, I'm not yours!! STOP LAUGHING!!!" I screamed, holding my head in my hands.
"Bruce he's traumatized her too badly. We can't help her. The doctors at Arkham are the only people who can. There's good people in there that can help her." Dick said. Dad sighed.
"...You're right. I just don't want her to think that I abandoned her there." He said, picking me up. Dick placed a hand on his shoulder.
"She won't. She needs help, Bruce." He said. Dad nodded, and together, they took me to Arkham, after changing my clothes first. Dad told them what happened, and then he and Dick quickly went home so that, when the Arkham staff called him. He and Dick came in as themselves, and watched as I was observed and evaluated. They definitely wanted to keep me. So, Dad and Dick hugged me, signed the papers, and left. I was settled in my room. It wasn't that bad, it was a lot nicer than the ones the super criminals had. There was a bed, nicer than the ones in the high security area, a rug, a wardrobe, a bathroom, and a door that locked from my side, but all the doctors had a key for it. I also had one of the big, bullet proof glass windows that all the cells had. I looked up when the door opened. A woman with dark brown hair in a bun walked in. I looked up at her from my curled up position on my bed.
"Hello Sweetheart. My name is Dr. Penelope Young. You can call me Dr. Penny if you like. Your name is Rowan Annalise Wayne, right?" She asked. I nodded. "So, what happened?" She asked. "Your Father says you were attacked by the Joker. Did you purposely go find him, like he said?" She asked. I nodded again. "Why?"
"...He killed my fiance." I mumbled. "I...I thought I could take him." I whispered. She nodded.
"But you underestimated him?" She asked. I nodded. "Alright. Here, I'm going to give you a physical look over. Is that okay?" She asked. I nodded. She looked me over, finding a ton of cuts and bruises, before finally coming to my right leg. She gasped. "Sweetheart, we need to get you to Medical right away!" She said. I frowned, looking down at my leg, but Dr. Penny stopped me. "No, don't look! We'll get you taken care of, Rowan." She said. She helped me stand on my good leg, ready to get into a wheelchair. Suddenly, I heard the Joker's laugh! I froze. I went completely rigid. I couldn't move. Mentally, I just collapsed in on myself, trying to protect my mind from further mental damage. "Rowan? Rowan, are you okay?" She asked. Then she saw the Joker being pulled past by guards. Thankfully, he didn't notice me, and once I couldn't hear him anymore, I relaxed, and came back to myself. "Rowan, what happened?" She asked, grabbing a clipboard.
"I-I don't know. I just...froze. My mind went blank, and I couldn't breath!" I whispered. She nodded and wrote it down.
"Okay. I'm gonna put in your file that you need to be kept away from the Joker. He acts as a trigger for your mind to freeze. Your mind collapses in on itself and blocks everything else out to protect itself from further damage." She said. I nodded. She helped me sit down in the wheelchair and I was taken down to the Medical building. There, the doctor looked at my leg, determined that it would be paralyzed and useless, so they went ahead and amputated it. After that, Dr. Penny tried to help me, but I was making very slow progress. She had told me though, that that was okay. That I had been horribly traumatized by what the Joker had done to me, and it was just taking my mind a long time to register that it was safe, therefore allowing it to heal. I had been at Arkham for a month, when the guards decided to take me to the Rec Room. They had seen my file, but ignored the part that said to keep me away from the Joker. They walked me down to the Room to socialize. I was wearing the typical Arkham outfit, a beige shirt and pants, and a sock with rubber stoppers on the bottom. Once I got in there, I saw the Riddler and the Penguin playing chess, Two-Face reading a book, and Poison Ivy watching TV. I decided that my safest bet was to go and watch TV with Ivy. So, I slowly made my way over to her, on crutches. I was also wearing a white patch over my eye, held in place by medical tape.
"Uh...is it okay if I watch TV with you?" I asked, quietly. She looked over at me and shrugged.
"Sure." She said. So, I sat beside her. "You're Rowan Wayne, aren't you?" She asked. I nodded. "What are you doing here?" She asked. I rubbed my arm, looking down.
"I-I'd really rather not talk about it..." I mumbled. She shrugged and went back to watching her show. I began watching too. She was watching Planet Earth: Life, and it looked like the episode on Plants. We were silent for a few minutes, before I looked over at her. "I-I like this show...it's really interesting." I said. She smiled a little.
"You like plants?" She asked. I nodded.
"Uh-huh. I have a few in my room back home. My favorite is my blue orchid. I've had it for three years!" I said. I was actually beginning to open up to Poison Ivy of all people. We began talking about different ways to care for different plants and what our favorite flowers were. All of a sudden, I heard the Joker talking. And I froze. My mind collapsed again. Ivy looked at me, curiously.
"Rowan? What's wrong?" She asked. I didn't respond. I was frozen where I was, my mind couldn't function. "Rowan, answer me!" Ivy actually looked worried! She got up to go get one of the guards. However, just as she got up, the Joker was suddenly in my face!
"Hiya, Ace! Fancy seeing you here!" He said. And I started screaming. I started screaming, and flailing my arms around. I was moving around so violently that I flipped the couch backwards! I fell onto the floor, but I was still screaming. I was in such a state that, as I started hyperventilating, I started vomiting too. I was able to stop the vomiting, but the screaming and hyperventilating, I couldn't have stopped even if I wanted to! Suddenly, someone locked me down in a bear hug, stopping my flailing. They turned my face to face them. It was Ivy!
"It's alright Rowan. He won't hurt you. I'll kill him first." She said, glaring at the Joker. His laughter rang in my head, as I finally broke out of my mental shutdown, I began sobbing. Dr. Penny ran in.
"What's happened?!" She asked. She saw me in Ivy's arms, and the Joker laughing at my pain. She glared at the guards. "Did you not see what I wrote in her file?! She is to be kept away from the Joker at all times! Just his voice alone triggers a mental shutdown!" She yelled. The guards looked at each other.
"We're sorry Doc. We...we didn't take that part seriously." One of the guards said. She shook her head.
"Well next time, I hope you do." She said, then walked over to me. "Rowan? Come on Sweetheart, let's get you back to your room." She said. She gently helped me and Ivy stand, but I wouldn't let go of Ivy. "Oh dear. In her mental break, she seems to have attached to you, Pamela, as a way of grounding herself." She said. "Hmm...would you mind if we moved her into your cell with you? You might be able to help her heal." She said. Ivy looked down at me, then back at her.
"No, I don't mind. We get along very well." She said. And with that, I was moved into the high security area with Ivy. Once I settled in, I looked over at her.
"Th-thank you..." I mumbled. She looked over at me.
"Of course, Dear. It's nice not to be alone for once." She said. We were silent again, and I decided to tell her why I was currently residing in Arkham, since she is allowing me to stay in her cell with her.
"...The Joker killed my fiance." I said, quietly. She turned fully towards me.
"What?" She asked. I sighed.
"Biologically, I am the Joker's daughter. He named me Ace. When he first came around in Gotham, I got dragged along. In his first stint in Arkham, I had been surrendered to the state, where Bruce Wayne adopted me, renaming me Rowan Annalise. I was about four years old I think. When I turned eight, Bruce took in Dick Grayson, and when I turned thirteen, he took in Jason Todd. I got close to Jason. We fell in love. We dated from the time I was sixteen till...just seven months ago." I started.
"How old are you now?" She asked.
"Nineteen. He was twenty. He...he worked with Batman." I said. She nodded, allowing me to go on. "He was brash and had a bad temper. He was very angry and frustrated with how Batman handled the Joker. He thought that Batman should kill the Joker." I said.
"If he did, then Joker would win." She said. I nodded.
"Yes, that's how I always saw it. I tried to explain that to him, but he wouldn't listen. He...went after the Joker. Alone. He didn't come back. We scoured all of Gotham trying to find him. I even came into the Asylum trying to find him. I couldn't. It was like he had disappeared without a trace. I was already so distraught. I was barely keeping it together." I said. Ivy frowned.
"Rowan...did you work with Batman as well?" She asked. I froze. I knew that I shouldn't tell her, but...she had been the first person I had been able to fully open up to since Jason had died. I couldn't even tell Dad how I had been feeling! I sighed.
"Yeah...yeah, I did. I do. I'm the Batman's Shadow." I said. She nodded. "Please, Ivy...I'm trusting you with so much about me...please don't tell anyone!" I said. She gently placed a hand on my shoulder.
"I won't, I promise. You can continue your story if you wish." She said. I nodded and took a deep breath.
"Okay. Well, six months after Jason had disappeared, Batman contacted me. He had received a video tape, he didn't know who from. I got to his base, and me, Nightwing, and Batman watched the tape. The first thing we saw was Jason...tied to a chair, beaten, bruised, and...broken. So broken...I'd never seen him like that. And I never want to see him like that again. Joker asked his name, and who he hated. Jason responded Batman. He asked if Jason knew who he was and to tell him who he was. Jason was going to respond. Then...then....Joker shot him! Point blank in the chest!!" I began to sob. "He was lying there, not moving, he was dead!" I cried. Ivy rubbed my back, and when I finally calmed down a little, I sniffed. "That was the first time my mind collapsed in on itself and I froze. I was numb and so...broken myself. Once I got my senses back, I went on a rampage through the criminal underground of Gotham. I went from Penguin, to Two-Face, to the Riddler, beating the crap out of them until they told me what the Joker's last known location was. It was Black Mask that finally told me where he was. Even offered me a hundred grand to get the Joker out of his Steel Mill!" I laughed a little. "Anyway, I found the Joker. I demanded to know where Jason's body was. I wanted to bury him. Joker told me he had burned Jason's body and the ashes were gone, all throughout Gotham somewhere. I thought I could take him. Didn't turn out that way. He kept blaming me, saying it was my fault Jason died, and, when he finally left, and Batman and Nightwing found me, I was mentally broken. I completely collapsed in on myself. And here I am." I said. Ivy was nice enough to give me a hug.
"Oh, Rowan. I am so sorry that you went through all that. Don't worry. While you are here, I will take you under my wing. We'll get you all better and back home in no time." She said. I looked up at her, curiously.
"Ivy, why are you being so nice to me? I thought you hated human beings." I said. She smiled a little.
"I suppose I see a lot of myself in you. Young love that went right for you, but wrong for me. I also don't like the Joker. He already tortures Harley. Seeing him torture his teenage daughter is too much for me." She said. I smiled, and let her hold me.
"Thank you, Ivy."