SPOILERS FOR THE SANDERS SIDES EPISODE 'PUTTING OTHERS FIRST'. GO WATCH THAT VIDEO FIRST IF YOU HAVE NOT YET, AS THIS CONTAINS SPOILERS. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED.
Warnings: Angst, swearing, I suppose Remus (Though he isn't that bad in this-), implied abuse, death mentions, past unsympathetic Patton. Let me know if I've missed anything.
Speaking to one another was not strictly forbidden, however it was frowned upon for angels and demons to talk with each other. That's why most assign one or the other to various schools, and you don't usually go there if you're not of that species. What is difficult, however, is when a new school opens up and the general population of angels and demons haven't labelled it as 'for angels' or 'for demons' yet. It would probably help if human society knew of their existence among them. That was often the perspective of many of the younger winged creatures, who just wanted to live without the weight of their species past mistakes and endeavours.
But, unfortunately they just wouldn't be able to. It's ingrained in your head the moment you start forming an opinion on the matter. You just... Shouldn't talk to someone if they have devil wings, a tail and horns. That's what my parents always told me. My friends, on the other hand, had vastly different opinions. And for good reason.
I was about five minutes from my house, making my way to the university I had been accepted to with my stuff to move into my new dorm, when I hear someone yell out for me. "Virgie~" Remus dragged out my nickname for a solid minute, while I stood staring at him, deadpan. Once he finished, he looked at me with a face telling me he was expecting something in response. And I did. I gave him a slap and an eye roll, continuing to walk after standing waiting for him to catch up. He laughed manically, his tail going to trip me up. I catch sight of it in the corner of my eye, and just about miss it, stumbling forward a bit to regain my balance. After that, I turned to see him cackling, just about rolling on floor in a fit of giggles.
"Remus, what the fuck? I could've dropped my shit. Do you need something?" I ask, quite seriously annoyed at him almost making me cause a scene. "Not to mention how close we are to my parents' house, and you know they don't like you and Jan." I added that last part on in almost a mutter, more to myself then to him.
Unfortunately, Remus seemed to hear this and went from a happy goofy mood to downcast in less than a second. He sighed and stood up, making his way to walk next to me without saying anything. If his sudden change in demeanour wasn't enough to tip you off as to how my statement made him feel, his wings drooped somewhat, the feathers becoming slightly ruffled. I immediately felt bad, but kept the silence between us, as he usually prefers to bring up the matter first rather than someone else mention it. After a minute or two of walking in silence, the sound of my drag along luggage bags being the only sound other than footsteps to fill the air, Remus sighed and began to speak.
"Sorry, Vee. I know how conscious you are of your parents, and that you just want to keep us safe from them and their butt-sticks." I couldn't help but chuckle at that, and he gained a little extra pep in his step after hearing it. He continued, "I just wanted to say hi 'cause you're normally never out walking this early! It's weird, y'know..." He suddenly gasped loudly, and jumped in front of my path, causing me to stop abruptly. "Are you even Virgil?! What if you're just a clone or something sent in place of Virgil! Or worse... You're actually trying to arrive on time to sort out your dorm at school!" A smirk made it's way onto both of our faces as he moved out of my way to allow us to keep moving.
"Ding ding ding, you guessed correctly. I am actually a hype-realistic robot sent in place of your friend. My goal was to infiltrate your friend's life without being detected, but it seems my mission has failed. Congratulations on noticing a very small change in your friend's daily routine. Though, may I suggest that this is simply a side affect of being very anxious about going to a new school as opposed to my master plan of replacing him." The two of us laugh at my response, which hearkened back to some of our previous interactions that were now inside jokes within our trio of outcasts. Once our giggling subsided though, the mention of my anxious thoughts were not forgotten by him, much to my disappointment.
"But seriously Virgie, you got nothing to worry about. This place is basically all but claimed by angels and there are hardly any devils on campus now. Plus, me and Janus are both coming here, and we've all seen that there are dorms with three rooms. Add onto that the fact that we all came from the same school and we've got ourselves a pretty good chance of being together." His words calmed me slightly, but I still had a small bit of concern ingrained in me at the what-ifs.
"I guess you're right Re. I'm just worried about you and Jan now though. From what I've seen, devils seem way more chill about your angel parts than angels are of your devil parts. Are you two sure you're okay coming here for me?" The look in his eyes at that moment told me two things, the first being that he was perfectly sure about coming here and helping to support me. The second thing leads on from that, and reminds me why he has those feathered wings on his back instead of black leathery ones. Though his mischief streak is not lost on me. I am, however, grateful for him turning his old... habits into that of more practical jokes. To summarise, basically, I understand and agree on why he has both his wings and tail. The same logic can be applied to Janus as well. Though he was never quite to the same extreme as Remus, he was up there with how negatively he affected people's lives. It makes sense with... what he did, for him to turn to sarcasm and stuff of that sort. They were never the best, but after we all three met, I can tell how hard they've been trying, and I really do appreciate them.
Now though, they were risking being ridiculed by a fairly large population of this new school, just to stay by my side and help support me. I can't say I'm not thankful, but my concern for them is unwavering. I am, however, cut from my thoughts when we arrive at the entrance to the main campus, where the dorms are located. Me and Remus exchange a glance to each other before we make our way to find Janus by our arranged meeting spot.
By time we got there, Jan was sitting talking to Remus' brother, Roman. Well, in both their previous lives they were brothers, but now Remus was born a hybrid and Roman a complete angel, so they weren't technically deemed brothers anymore. But fuck society, they were the best brothers each other could've ever asked for. Despite their differences and pressures from people all around them, the two resolved and were able to look past their past and dedicated themselves to rebuilding the relationship they had lost while they were completely alive. So it was not strange for us to see Remus sprint towards him and start chatting back and fourth frantically as though at any minute they would be separated. And, given their deaths and life experiences, it was a reasonable fear for them both to obtain. While they caught up each other on the last couple weeks they were apart, me and Jan left to go find out our dorms, seeing as we actually brought luggage unlike Remus and Roman.
The walk was quiet, neither of us feeling the need to speak as were more than happy just being in the other's presence. On the way over, the two of us crossed paths with mostly humans, showing no wings, horns or tails of any kind, but there were many angels who spared us a confused second glance, or tensed as Janus looked at them. Quite a few would look at me as though I was crazy to keep a hybrid in my presence, and as a pair we received more than our fair share of disgusted gazes thrown our way. As we finally made it over to the dorms, I had seen a grand total of three devils outside, though they seemed to be there purely in an attempt to raise a social awareness that we newer generations of angels and devils shouldn't be adhering to the pressures put on us by ancestors. Though, it didn't seem to be going particularly well, and they were now applying the logic of strength in numbers.
Inside the building there was almost nobody around. There were a few humans loitering in various places around the room and, much to our friend group's luck, the receptionist too was human. We walked up to desk and quickly got their attention. "Hiya! How can I help?" On the desk was a neat little plaque with the name 'Mx. Talyn.' I took a mental note of the gender neutral honorific and thought to keep that in mind while talking to this person. Janus seemed to pick up on it too, as he smiled slightly at how much better the world was getting than while he was in the world of the completely alive.
"Hi there. We were hoping to ask about our dorm rooms?" Janus said smoothly, most likely sensing my bit of panic start to build up, to which I have to thank him for later.
"Okay! Can I have your names?" They asked us with a smile. Jan nudged me, urging me to answer with my name first, giving me a small encouraging smile.
"Uh, um... V-Virgil Storm." I stated, cursing myself inwardly for stuttering. Though, the look Jan gave me told me just how proud he was of me.
"Alright sir, your room is 046, on the second floor. You have a two bedroom and are sharing with Patton Hart." The smile this Talyn gave me showed absolutely no malicious intent were meant in their actions, and I knew that this was obviously not their fault, but in that moment my brain went into overdrive and had me thinking they were the cause of my problem. Janus picked up on the name straight away and quickly took my room key from them, gave his name and got his room key before turning to me and showing me to his room. By this point I had zoned out completely, my mind going hazy and barely focusing on one thing at a time. Quick flashes of how I left the world of the living soon began to cloud my vision further, until I was in that moment.
He was there. I had no room to leave. It was my own fault. I shouldn't have made a comment. He was right there. It took a lot to push him over the edge. That's what everyone says. I always manage to do it easily though. It's my fault. I'm just that much of an awful person. His hands are on my throat.
I can't breathe.
I'm dying. I'm dying, I'm dying, I'm dying. Oh god what about everyone else. They'll be so sad that I made him do this. I pushed him too far. I-
"Virgil?" That was his voice. He didn't ever call me that while we were there. That was him right now. In the present. He's here. "Virgil, breathe slowly. In and out in deep breathes. Listen to my breathing and match yours with mine." I nodded and listened to the sound. I didn't want to disappoint him again. It was close but far away. I tried to copy, but failed my first few attempts. I don't know how long it's been, but my breathing was back to normal more or less, and by vision, though blurry, was back and no longer being interrupted by sudden flash backs.
Once it was clear I was back in the present, I heard Jan force a loud cough, and I could feel his glare at Patton increase in intensity. I rubbed my eyes again in an attempt to rid them of the blurriness, and it worked this time. I looked up to see Patton with his head towards the ground, preparing for the assault of words that was sure to come his way. What he didn't expect however, was me going and hugging him softly. His head snapped up at the gentle action, and his tentatively hugged back. "I'm sorry I pushed you too far back then Pat. I know I'm the reason, but I really don't think I could face you when I'm in my right mind. I'm so sorry." Pat choked out a small sob at my words and pulled away so he could look into my eyes.
"Virgil, never say sorry for someone else... hurting you. What happened and what I did has no excuse, and you don't need one to justify not speaking to me. And there's no room to argue that, as I'm sure your friend will agree. You did nothing wrong, no matter what you may think. I'll be in our dorm unpacking, but I'd recommend spending some time with your friends. I'll see you, Virgil." With that, Patton turned and walked out the bathroom, and left just me and Janus standing there. I sighed, knowing deep down that Patton was right. I turned to my yellow-clad friend and offered a half smile. He offered me one in return, and after that we were headed back to his room to unpack his stuff.
I didn't return to the dorm I shared with Patton until way after midnight. He was up, watching cartoons on his laptop. Glancing up, we made eye contact, and both gave a small nod of acknowledgement to the other. Over the course of that year, we found ourselves hardly speaking to each other, but that was for the better. So long as we both acted civil, it was mutually agreed among everyone who knew of our past that this was the best way to deal with the situation. And as much as i'm ashamed to say it, the pressure from the angel community to not interact with demons was probably at play here too. Maybe that's why I decided that, come the end of university, I wanted to try and make a friend of Patton.
But for now, we'll stick to not talking.
Words: 2454
So... I was not expecting to make it so angsty. Apologies for that, I had a plan but just, while I was writing it turned into this... Well uh, this was based on both @sanderssides_prompts and @writingpromptsforsanderssides's "Collabor-may-tion" Day one prompts, as shown below. I also decided torture myself and draw how I imagine Janus and Remus in this AU, so I hope you also enjoy that.
Wings are a pain to draw. Hope you enjoyed this though! Bye all!