I feel that my narrative is the following:
I'm a horrible girlfriend who keeps trying to convince his boyfriend to stay, when he's already made a decision...to escape.
It's the second time now. I feel embarrassed for not realizing it sooner. Why did I stop him a second time? Why did he let himself be stopped? He should fly away from me. Far away.
He'll be happier then.
I make him miserable after all.
It's sad, I know I'm a good person. I'm sad the person I love doesn't see that.