I smoothed over my outfit and waited for Niall to arrive at my home.
Everything in my life seems so.. weird at the moment... doesn't seem real.
My one night stand ends up working with me... AND I find out he has a fiancée who is actually working with me too.
Then Niall pops back into my life after like 5 years of being without each other.
..it's weird. The whole thing is weird.
And I still can't believe Michael came into my office and had the audacity to plead with me and beg me not to tell his fiancée about his unloyal, cheating ass.
He should be the one fucking telling her, none of this shit is my fault. And that's the fucking truth. He came up to me in the club that night, he wanted to talk to me, he bought me a drink and he asked me to come home with him. He fucked me knowing full well he has a fiancée.
I just can't seem to get him out of my head though, he's so handsome, and he's so good in bed.
But I know it's just lust, he has good dick game and that attracts me to him... as well as his insanely good looks.
When there's a knock at my door I get up and pull the front door open to meet with Niall's face.
"Hey," I smiled at him... he looked me up and down and smirked softly "hey, you ready to go?"
I nodded "I sure am," I grabbed my bag from the bottom of the stairs that already has my phone in, my keys and my purse.
I walked out my door and shut it, I retrieved the keys from my bag and locked my door.
I turned around and my eyes met with Niall's blue ones
"you look insanely beautiful tonight, by the way" he smiled making me blush softly.
His words always had such an impact on me and made me feel some type of way.
He smiled even wider as we made our way to his car "you always look beautiful though, you always have done"
I laughed getting in his car "you're embarrassing me now"
I looked down at my seat as I clipped the belt in, he giggled at me clipping his seat belt in too.
"It's the truth though" he started up his car and smirked at me
I blushed looking at him "thank you!"
When we get to our favourite restraunt we are seated right at the back in a booth where we have a lot more privacy.
I clear my throat.. I need to make this apology good.
"You dyed your hair.. what made you go back brown?? I always loved the blonde" I state softly as I sip on my red wine.
He laughed and intertwined his fingers together as his arms rested on the table "I never wanted my hair to be blonde... I don't get me wrong, I only ever dyed it blonde before I went on the XFactor because— I liked it— but once they put me in the band, I wanted to go back brown, management said I couldn't... they said it created more of a difference between me and the boys. Made me stand out. Made us all look different" he stated and shrugged "I know you've always loved my blonde hair though"
I laughed softly then frowned, "they wouldn't let you choose how you wanted your own hair??"
He shook his head "honestly, I felt like I was being stripped from my own rights as a human half of the time. I worked none stop for 5 years, barely went home and visited my family. And when we did have time off we had to stay in London because we needed to be going to the studio— then again, it was very rare for us to be in the studio. We never had time. Our tour bus was our studio" he laughed softly.
"Simon is a shitty person" I claim and sip on my red wine again. He nodded "he is, but I'm thankful, he helped put me in one of the biggest boybands, I'm thankful, I love my fans, I have wonderful fans who adore me. Just because of him—"
"I wouldn't of met you, either, if it wasn't for him" he smiled at me making me blush. I look down and chuckle "don't be stupid"
"You're an important person in my life.. ever since I met you, you've always been important to me"
"That's sweet" I blushed.
"But— staying on that subject, kind of, I wanted to apologise properly" I sighed defeatedly "like I said in my message last night. I have no valuable reason to explain why I did what I did. I was stupid and immature. I didn't want a relationship, it wasn't you, it was never you, you aren't to blame. It was all me. I didn't want a relationship. I was scared" I looked into his eyes
"Scared of what?" He asked softly searching my eyes for an answer "I was scared of what the public would think of me, your fans, your family"
He shrugged "so that made you want to sleep with my best friends?"
"I didn't sleep with Liam" I frowned.
He raised a brow at me "you know what I mean!" He snapped, then immediately sighed "I'm sorry for snapping, it just still hurts me, a lot..." he complained rubbing his face "I haven't recovered from that day the boys told me that you slept with them too!" He looked into my eyes after rubbing his face intensively, his eyes were red.
"I'm sorry Niall, I wish I would of told you" I frowned "you didn't deserve to find out something like that the way you did... it should of never of happened" I say feeling ashamed.
"Why?" He looked up at me from looking down at the plate "wasn't I good enough for you??" A tear slipped from his right eye.
I frowned at the sight as my heart broke slowly, I've ruined this man.
I shook my head quickly "no, Niall, don't ever say that! You were always good enough, you were a complete angel to me!" I reached for his hand, but he was soon to move that away from me as he leant back in his chair placing his hands on his legs.
"So why did you do me over like that?" He breathed steadily, furrowing his brows at me "I don't know Niall, it's not just me to blame though.. they're to blame too! All three of them! Each and everyone of them would of known how you felt about me.. damn... Harry and Louis probably consoled you once I left you that day" I laughed feeling stressed and shocked.
He looked down and nodded "yeah they did" he looked up at me and frowned "I found out before Zayn left the band.. he told me while me and the boys was arguing with each other. We were arguing about how he treats Perrie" he said, I was listening carefully "we didn't agree with how he spoke to her, and how he went about certain things in their relationship. I mean— we love Perrie.. always have, since 2011 when we met her and the girls. So we didn't want her heart breaking. Zayn took it totally the wrong way and was lashing out at me and the boys.. he went in harder on me... and spilled it to me how you both fucked 'on the regular'" he quoted Zayn, pain was written all over his eyes and face.. and was vocalised in his saddened voice.
I frowned and looked down "what did he actually say to you, if you remember?"
He sighed softly " 'shut up Niall, you know nothing, and you especially don't know how to keep a fucking girl happy.. that's why Chan ran off and left you... and that's why she fucked me all those times' I didn't believe any of it though, at first" he shook his head frowning as a few tears slipped from his ocean like eyes.
"But the next thing he said confined it for me 'why do you think she ran away?? Why do you think she avoided you all those times? We both fucked on the regular Niall, I'm sorry you found out like this but—' and that's all I remember of what he said.. the boys claimed I blacked out after that" he shrugged sighing softly.
"How did you find out about me and erm— me and..." I couldn't get my words out. I felt so bad.
He raised his eyebrows at me "how did I find out about you, Louis and Harry??" He finished my sentence off for me.
I nodded.
He sighed and leant forward... "it was a few weeks before the hiatus... I don't even remember how I found out. We was sat around a fire in the woods having a chat about life.. and about everything that has happen in the last 5 years of us 5 being a band and being friends... Zayn got brought up. And so did you..." he sighed and looked in my eyes "Louis told me first... about you two... then Harry decided to confess"
"I'm so sorry Niall I—"
"And it was then and there I decided I wanted to cut off all contact with the boys.. well not liam. He was still loyal to me, he never did what the other three did. But I had to leave for myself. To give myself peace— Simon wouldn't let me leave the band on my own... he didn't want a three piece band.
So me and the boys eventually sat down together and talked about having this break. We all said it was well needed and we really needed time away from each other... it was clear" Niall ranted and I nodded understandably.
"Do you forgive me??"
He laughed and wiped his face "of course I forgive you, you nutcase.. why wouldn't I??!" He laughed softly, his eyes brightening by the minute. It was such a difference from his dad, dull eyes from five minutes ago.
I laughed with him too. And we managed to enjoy the rest of our night together.
"Why don't you stay at mine? Saves you driving all the way home" I say softly as I'm about to get out of his car as we are now on my drive way at my home:
He looked at his phone, presumably looking at the time, "yeah sure" he nodded.
We walked in and got settled down.. we watched a film in the living room and we decided to part ways and head to bed.
He was in the guest room next to my room.
Before I got some shut eye... my last thoughts were the situation I am stuck in with Michael and his fiancée, Kelly.
Should I tell Niall?? He may be able to help me on what I should do, Niall always has been great with advice!!
Yeah— I sigh wrapping myself with my warm quilts and hugging my pillows and cushions— I'll tell Niall tomorrow about the Michael and Kelly situation.