"So one of us has to take a bunch of pictures of the other depicting a specific emotion. And then next Friday the rest of the class has to guess what it is," Ashton said, fiddling with his Canon camera. It was a point-and-shoot he had gotten for Christmas a few years back. "I'd like to take the photos." Then he hastily added, "If you don't mind!"
Calum was sitting in Ashton's office chair, amusing himself by spinning around and around until everything was a blur of color. He grabbed the desk to stop himself and blinked repeatedly as the room swayed. Ashton fought the urge to roll his eyes.
"Sure," Calum said, trying to focus his eyes on the other boy. "You should take the pictures. I only take photography because I needed an extra class for this year. You actually have talent."
Ashton grinned. He loved when people complimented his art. Ashton had been taking pictures since he was six years old when he held a real camera for the first time.
Little Ash had taken an immediate interest when he saw his uncle using one at cousin's seventh birthday party. His uncle let him play with it, helping him with the buttons and how to work the zoom, partly to be nice and partly to make sure he didn't break it. Ashton instantly loved the clicking noise it made and how the pretty pictures popped up on the screen. It was obvious how much fun the child was having as he dashed around the room yelling "Smile!" and taking awful pictures of unsuspecting party guests. Ever since then Ashton wanted to be a photographer.
"Okay," he said, "so what emotion should we do?"
"Happiness?" Calum shugged. "I don't know."
Ashton pursed his lips and ahook his head. "Let's go a little deeper than that," he said. "Happiness is so straightforward. Maybe we can do something relating to it though."
Calum dropped his head back. "Crap I'm bad at this. Food? Food is happiness."
Ashton giggled, "I agree food is happiness but it's not an emotion."
"Damn. I love food."
They stayed silent for another few minutes, Calum occasionally clucking his tongue. And then it hit Ashton. The thought was like getting slapped with a brick.
"That's it," he shouted, jumping up. "Brilliant idea, Calum!"
"What's it? What did I do?"
"Love's it!"
"Love?" Calum said, looking more confused and skeptical by the second.
"Yeah! For our emotion!" Ashton enthused. Calum had a look of utmost discomfort on his face. Ashton noticed and began begging, "Please, Calum? I doubt anyone else is going to do it. Mrs. Mayvel will love it! Pleeeeeaaaaaasssee? We'll get a good grade, I promise! Please please please-"
"Alright alright!" Calum interrupted. "We can do it."
"Yes!" Ashton cheered and engulfed the boy in a hug.
Ashton knew that he and Calum weren't really friends. They both had their own cliques at school. Calum was a jock, being captain of the soccer team, while Ashton was considered an art geek, being an active member of Palette Club. He knew it was a big step to ask Calum to model the emotion love for him. But Ashton knew what he wanted to do as he set up the flash on his camera and changed the lens.
"We'll do it right here because what better place to let go of your feelings than in your bedroom?"
"We're in your bedroom," Calum pointed out.
"A bedroom, then," Ashton said, setting up his tripod. "Sit please."
Ashton brightened the rooms lighting and turned around to see Calum already shifting his weight on the bed. He wasn't one for sitting still and Ashton knew that was going to cause some trouble. He disregarded it for the moment and began taking test shots. The dark haired boy needed to be adjusted every few minutes and no matter how irritating it was, Ashton managed to keep his patience-- and sanity-- in check.
"Okay," he finally said.
Calum's eyes lit up. "We're done?"
His excitment at the thought of being able to leave made Ashton's smile waver but he covered it up quickly. Why would he want to spend time with a nerd like him anyways?
"Done? We haven't even started," Ashton chuckled.
"What? But you've been taking all those pictures!"
"Those were just test shots," he explained. "A practice run. You know, to get a feel for angles and lighting and such."
Calum groaned, "I've been sitting here for a billion years!"
"It hasn't even been ten minutes."
"Do we have to do this today?"
"Yes, Calum, I already set up all the equipment and I'll need the rest of the week for retouching."
"But this is boring," he complained.
"Suck it up."
He pouted and Ashton refocused the camera. "Okay," he said. "Now you need to actually model. Give me your best love expression."
Calum visibly swallowed. Then he attempted what Ashton thought was supposed to be a dreamy expression but in reality looked more like he had stubbed his toe and was trying to conceal the blinding agony. Ashton sighed.
"Um... Calum? Not to be rude or anything, but you don't look in love," Ashton bit his lip. "Like, at all."
Calum dropped the face and said, "Well what does being in love look like to you?"
"I don't know," he shrugged. "Less painful?"
Calum shook his head, "I disagree." Ashton raised an eyebrow and Calum continued, "I think pain is a huge part of love. There's the sadness of hiding your crush. And you're slowly dying inside when you see them with someone else. Angry that they won't look at you that way. And of course, the worst pain of all: heartbreak. The blistering pain that causes you to cry and eat ice cream and wear pajamas and watch terrible movies and just hurt.
"There's a lot of emotions in love when you think about it. There's all the pain and sadness. But there's also happiness." Ashton placed his chin in his hands, listening as Calum stared into space, describing love in a way he had never imagined. "When you finally get together, there's this swell of joy, a bubble of happy that makes your heart increase three times the size and makes you want to smile and never stop. Love isn't one emotion. It's a thousand emotions all bundled up with a new label slapped on."
When Calum finished his tirade, they sat in silence mulling over his words. They had been strangely wise and insightful. A thought occurred to Ashton.
"Calum, have you... have you ever been in love before?" he asked.
He didn't respond, his cheeks turning bright red. He nodded keeping his gaze on the wall behind the curly haired boy. He looked anywhere but Ashton's eyes.
"Really?" Ashton asked.
Calum nodded and bit his lip before saying, "I still am."
Ashton smiled and hesitated before saying, "Do you mind if ask who?"
That was all it took. Calum's eyes hardened, his guard flung up like a solid wall of concrete. It was clear that the answer to that question was yes, yes he did mind.
"Nevermind," Ashton quickly said. "You have a point about love being more than one thing. Love is a jumble and that's what we need to do for our project. You said you're in love so show me. Show me all the emotions you feel when you think of her."
So the next hour filled with Calum modeling expressions of great despair and bittersweetness and extreme joy and frustration and simple happiness laced with raw sad. It was when a tear rolled down his cheek that Ashton froze.
"Goddamn it, Ashton," Calum whispered, wiping his eyes.
"I-I'm sorry," he said. He took his hands off the camera. "I didn't realize that thinking about her would be this hard."
Ashton looked at him with saddened eyes. He hadn't meant to upset Calum. If he knew that doing love would cause this kind of emotional strain, he would have chosen something entirely different.
"Him."
Ashton's eyebrows raised. "I'm sorry?"
Calum laughed at his shock. "Yeah, I like guys," he said.
"Am I- have you told anyone else?" Ashton asked.
He shook his head slowly. "No. It's only you."
"Wow," Ashton was completely surprised. He wasn't even friends with Calum yet he was the first one he told about his sexuality. "I'm really touched that you trust me enough to tell me this, Calum, but why me?"
Calum chuckled and shook his head again. His eyes, red from crying, met Ashton's. "You don't see it."
"I don't?"
"No. You don't see that it's only you," Calum said and wiped his eyes again as more tears fell.
Ashton sat quietly for a moment pondering this. "Do you mean...you like me?"
"No, Ashton," Calum said. "I love you."
Ashton was dumbfounded. Calum loved him. Calum who was cool and popular and good-looking loved Ashton who was... not.
"I love you, Ashton," Calum spoke, his voice clear and strong, "because your smile is brighter than your blinding camera flashes. I love you because you're so nice to people even when they don't deserve it. I love you because you're beautiful and kind and smart and amazing and wonderful and I just love you."
Almost in a daze Ashton stood up, walked over to the bed where Calum sat, and crashed their lips together. Calum encircled his waist and pulled Ashton onto his lap. The kiss was heated and passionate and full of love. The good qualities of love. The ones that should shine bright through the sadness and frustration and anxiety.
They broke apart and leaned their foreheads together.
"Nobody's ever said anything like that to me before," Ashton smiled.
"I think it's something you should hear more often. Every day, even," Calum said, "Because you deserve that."
Ashton blushed and pressed another kiss to his lips.
"Does this mean you love me too?" Calum asked looking worried.
"Yeah, I definitely love you too," Ashton grinned. "Otherwise I wouldn't have kissed you, right?"
Calum shrugged sheepishly. Ashton hopped off of Calum's lap and adjusted his glasses.
"Let's take one more picture, yeah?"
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
Next Monday at fourth period, the two boys stood side by side as their classmates attempted to guess what emotion their collage depicted. So far, no one had guessed correctly. Every time someone got it wrong, Ashton and Calum would share a smile and say "Nope" and the entire class would let out a collective groan.
"Happiness?" one girl, Dana, asked.
"No, it couldn't be," a boy named Roger shook his head. "He's too angry in the top left picture."
Ashton was slightly concerned that they wouldn't get the A. The whole class was at a loss, even Mrs. Mayvel who joined in as the class started arguing. He knew that they would understand once they explained it.
"I don't know," Dana groaned. "A girl on her period? It would make sense with the mood-swinginess of it."
"Nope," Calum and Ashton chorused. The class groaned. They began shouting out more emotions, now randomly guessing, not even based on the picture.
Ashton glanced back at the collage. Nine pictures, in each Calum wore a different expression. Ashton's favorite was the one right in the center, the one he had taken directly after their kiss. In the picture, Calum stared directly into the lens with the biggest smile he had ever seen.
And he realized then that he didn't care what he got on this project. The only thing that mattered was what he got out of it.
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
Thanks for reading! Let me know what you thought of it. I enjoyed writing this one, especially with Dana at the end :) Comment, vote, do whatever your heart desires! Also tell me what ship you want to see next and if you have a specific prompt. I have a bunch more in the process but I'll put them all aside if you request one!