Hermione pushed her empty breakfast plate away from her. The plate scratched on the table in the silence of the hall and Hermione bit her lip as she looked around; there was no one in the hall anymore, not even any of the Professors. She felt so alone once again since it was eleven o’clock and Draco was supposed to meet her at ten. She was sure he wasn’t going to come especially after what happened last night.
Hermione played with her hair as she stared down at her orange juice. Draco didn't care about her and it was time she realised it. He was playing around with her and Hermione was the fool to believe that they actually had something together. Although she could not ignore the feeling in her heart whenever he was around or when he spoke or when he... Hermione groaned slightly in irritation. She had to stop this! Crushing on Draco was just morally wrong for her, besides Hermione and Draco were extremely opposites and they would never work out. Draco was a pure blood and Hermione was muggle born; there was no way they would be accepted in society.
It was like Romeo and Juliet, Hermione thought with a frown on her face and then she felt stupid for even thinking that. She wasn’t in love with Draco, she just felt something when he was around. A voice broke her out of her contemplation.
‘You’re still here? I thought you would have left by now.’
Hermione looked up suddenly, hurting her neck as she did so. Draco sat next to her and yawned, covering his mouth with a pale hand. Hermione noticed that the pink wounds on his hand were fading now. Draco sighed when Hermione didn't answer him. He turned to face her, leaning his elbow on the table and his hand supported the side of his head as his grey eyes travelled over every feature of Hermione’s face while she looked down at her juice again.
‘Angry?’ he asked. There was no answer from Hermione so he continued, ‘I was really tired last night. I didn't mean to sleep in and I had every intention of waking up at ten to meet you here.’
‘Maybe you should go back to sleep,’ Hermione muttered after a small cough to clear her throat. She turned her whole body so that she was facing him and Draco stared at her, a slight smirk appeared on his lips. Hermione noticed the dark shadows that danced under his eyes and his pale skin colour seemed to clash with contrast.
‘I won’t be able to get to sleep again,’ Draco shrugged and grabbed a plate when his stomach growled as though begging for food. Hermione remembered that he didn't have anything to eat yesterday and then she blushed at the memory of them in the kitchens. He smirked as he filled his plate with breakfast foods, ‘just start talking and that’ll definitely lull me to sleep.’
‘You’re so funny,’ Hermione said without a trace of humour in her tone. She rolled her eyes at him and watched as he took a bite out of a pancake. Draco closed his eyes and nearly moaned as he swallowed and Hermione chuckled slightly. His stomach growled loudly again, ‘I think you should just eat and go to bed, Malfoy. You’ll get sick.’
‘If it means that much to you, why don’t you just help me to sleep?’ Draco asked and then winked at her so that Hermione could realise the true and dirty meaning behind his words. She immediately looked away and called him something nasty under her breath as she played with her hair, ‘language, Granger.’
‘I hate you so much,’ Hermione muttered, watching with a disgusting look as Draco took a huge bite out of an apple in front of her after he had finished his pancakes. He turned to her, chewing the apple with his mouth closed, and Hermione sighed, ‘take your time, Malfoy.’
Draco eyed her as he chewed his huge apple thoughtfully. Hermione narrowed her eyes at him and looked at him as though he was weird. When Draco had finished eating one bite of his apple, he took a deep breath and spoke.
‘It didn't seem like you hated me so much yesterday,’ Draco muttered and raised his eyebrows as Hermione looked at him, knowing what he was about to say, ‘you know, Granger, we have two more years of Hogwarts left, if I don’t jump off the Astronomy tower by then. Why don’t we just ignore each other for the next two years and then we’ll never see each other again? Sound good?’
Draco twirled the apple in his hands but didn’t look away from Hermione. Their eyes seemed to be glued to each others and Hermione wished he would stop.... stop looking at her even though she knew it was extremely pathetic and that she had only just developed feelings for Draco. But she didn't want him to leave her. She wanted them to be together with no difficulties even though Hermione was sure Harry and Ron would have something to say about it. And Dumbledore... Hermione nearly moaned out loud as she thought of disappointing Dumbledore. She was supposed to be spying on Draco not end up liking him! Hermione closed her eyes, took a shaky breath, and looked away.
‘Is that what you want?’ asked Hermione, turning her glare onto him, ‘we could just go back to the way it was and forget everything but...’
‘But...?’ asked Draco, leaning forwards, ‘but what? You don’t want to?’
Hermione had enough and she showed it by sighing impatiently.
‘Just forget it!’ Hermione groaned and Draco smirked at her. Hermione realised he didn't actually mean it and he probably wouldn’t just ignore her. She guessed he enjoyed annoying her and Hermione was just too gullible. Draco then sighed and handed her the apple which Hermione took with some confusion. He stood up, ‘going somewhere?’
‘Yeah,’ Draco said and scratched the back of his head, the smirk disappeared off of his face. Hermione didn't know it but Draco had been working furiously in the holidays to fix the vanishing cabinet since he had to get it done soon. He shrugged his shoulders, ‘I have stuff to do.’
‘What sort of stuff?’ Hermione asked curiously as she let the apple fall down to the table. Draco followed the apple as it rolled over and over before falling onto the ground and then he turned his gaze back to Hermione.
‘Stuff that you don’t need to know about,’ Draco winked at her and managed to smirk even though he didn't really feel like it, ‘try not to miss me too much.’
Hermione only rolled her eyes as Draco finished his orange juice and then started to walk away. Hermione watched his back and felt like she had to stop him from leaving or else the feeling of loneliness would engulf her once again. But she didn't stop him... not yet.
---
*Draco’s POV*
Draco held another apple in his hands but it wasn’t for eating. No, he had other plans for this apple. He twirled it around and around in his fingers and seemed to be pleading in a whisper for the apple to stay whole. The vanishing cabinet stood tall in front of him, almost looming over Draco as he took shaky breaths.
Draco was in the room of requirement where he had spent the last half year. He had been cooped up here in this darkened room with many other things but no people. It got quite lonely but he didn't need distractions. He just needed this to work so that he can be free and be able to keep his family away from the wrath of Voldemort.
‘Please work,’ he muttered to no one in particular.
Draco was almost sweating with anticipation and he let his hand go through his hair, no doubt messing it up. He took a shaky breath, feeling his lungs inflate and then deflate. He placed the apple into the cabinet and then closed it, leaning on the handle for a second. Draco was deathly pale now and his hair was sticking up.
‘Harmionia Nectere Passus...’ Draco whispered, lightly touching the cabinet with his wand. He repeated it three times and heard a whoosh before he repeated the spell and another whoosh sounded. He opened the cabinet and was surprised that he was sweating slightly.
The apple seemed to be sitting just how Draco had left it but Draco wasn’t fooled. He had done this too many times to know that he has to check the whole apple before he came to a conclusion. Draco bent and picked up the apple in shaking fingers. He slowly turned it around just to realise that a bite had been taken out of the apple... Draco sighed and leaned on the cabinet. He closed his eyes in annoyance and stayed like that for a second.
Then Draco lost it.
He chucked the apple across the room and it bounced off of another smaller cabinet and rolled over to his feet. Draco grabbed his wand and pointed it at the apple, fire burning in his eyes. The apple caught flames and slowly disintegrated into a mould. Draco fell to his knees and buried his face in his hands. He would never be able to do this! He wanted to scream out loud and break everything in the room.
‘God damn it!’ Draco yelled angrily, his voice was raw with frustration and he got to his feet and started to walk towards the door.
He had to get out of there before he completely lost it. Draco left the room of requirement and dug his hands deep into his pockets. Draco scowled at the ground as he walked. Everything he did turned to ashes and he had to do this! He needed to succeed so that his family could be safe! Draco rubbed his arm where the dark mark was burned into his skin. He wished it would just disappear, he wished he had a different family and then everything would be a lot simpler!
Draco went straight to the library in hopes of finding some sort of book that could help him with the vanishing cabinet. He could not stand another second in that dark and dusty room without breaking a bunch of stuff in there. Draco opened the library door and started to search for a book. He knew exactly where it would be and his feet led him straight there. Draco had a permanent frown plastered onto his face and he waved his wand so that a couple of books soared through into his open hands. He carried them to a table and took a seat, furiously flipping open one of the books. Draco flipped the page, barely reading any of the text since he was too angry at himself.
‘Damn it!’ Draco shouted out and shoved the book with as much force as he could muster. The book skidded along the table and fell splat to the floor. He breathed heavily threw his nose and with a second thought, he shoved all the books away with one arm and they fell to the floor too. Draco buried his face in his hands and a muffled sound came out, ‘damn it...’
‘Malfoy... what are you...’ Hermione trailed off and Draco looked up to see her standing in front of him. She surveyed the books on the floor with shock, ‘what happened?’
‘The books and I got into a fight,’ Draco said sarcastically but anger was evident in his tone.
‘Can’t you be serious at least once?’ Hermione muttered and then walked over the books, stepping gingerly as she did so, and came to stand beside Draco. She sighed and sat down, placing a hand on his arm, ‘what happened?’
Draco turned to look at her and his gaze went slowly down to her hand on his arm. Then he sighed and shook her hand off, saying, ‘I wish I could tell you but... I can’t and you know that perfectly well.’
‘Why can’t you tell me? What is it that you have to hide from everyone? Draco...’ Hermione whispered and boldly set her hand on his cheek, making him look at her, ‘I’m coming to conclusions that I hope aren’t true...’
‘Don’t call me Draco,’ Draco whispered, ‘we’re not friends, Granger, get that straight.’
‘We never were friends. We skipped that phase,’ Hermione said, shrugging, ‘and I wish you could just see that you can trust me. I need you to trust me because if you keep all your problems to yourself, you will go insane with stress.’
‘Why?!’ Draco suddenly stood up, pushing Hermione’s hand away from him. Hermione got to her feet too and crossed her arms over her chest. They faced each other like contestants in a battle, ‘why do you want to know so bad? Did someone put you up to this? Was it Potter? Does he want to know what I’m up to?!’
Hermione had never seen Draco this angry and she wondered if he would take out his wand and hex her right there and then. But he didn't. His questions caught her off guard since they were so close to the truth, expect Harry wasn’t the one telling her to do this, it was Dumbledore. Draco finished talking and there was a silence where he expected her to deny everything but Hermione couldn’t get any words out of her mouth. Her mouth just hung open and Draco stared at her in disbelief.
‘It... it’s true?’ Draco asked in utter incredulity, ‘you’re actually spending time with me to see if I... I was...’
‘No... no. That’s not what...’ Hermione lied, getting herself back together. Draco would be beyond angry if he found out right now and she couldn't let that happen. Hermione readied herself to lie again, ‘I’m not spying on you, Malfoy!’
‘Then why the hell do you want to know about my business, Granger?’ Draco asked in a whisper that scared Hermione lots more than his shouting. He walked forwards until they were close to feel each others body heat, ‘you’re a terrible liar. Tell me the truth right now, Granger... before I lose it.’
‘I am telling you the truth,’ Hermione whispered, ‘I’m not spying on you. I have to tutor you and I... I don’t know how we ended up kissing but I knew I liked you. I...’
‘TELL ME THE TRUTH!’ Draco yelled in her face and Hermione was surprised that her wasn’t blowing backwards from the sheer intensity of his voice.
‘Don’t... just stop,’ Hermione said, real fear was dawning on her face now as Draco’s anger increased. She set her hands on his chest to stop him from moving forwards, towards her, ‘I promise you I am not spying on you!’
‘If I find out that you are... I won’t hesitate in getting my wand out,’ Draco muttered, close to her face and Hermione could smell his breath that spelled of strong spearmint, ‘if you know what’s good for you, you’ll stay away from me.’
Draco left the library after that, stepping on the books that littered the floor. Hermione fell into a nearby chair and felt like her heart would never stop trying to beat its way out of her chest.
---
*Hermione’s POV*
Dear Harry,
I hope you’re enjoying your holidays and thank you for the presents, I loved it!
I don’t know how to say this but please don’t freak out. I stayed at Hogwarts because Malfoy was staying here and I know you are thinking of flying straight here but please don’t! I’m fine! Today I nearly got caught by Malfoy and I think he knows that we are onto him. I... I don’t know where Dumbledore is so I sent you an owl because I don’t know who else to turn to.
I’m going to stay away from him and I can’t tutor him anymore. I feel as though I am letting you down but then I realised that I didn't really get any information out of him. This whole spying is useless. I’m sorry, I can’t keep it up.
I miss you and hope you come back here safely. See you soon.
Love
Hermione
Hermione sent the letter off with one of the school’s owls. She watched it fly off into the darkness and felt as though she might start crying. She didn't want to let Harry and Dumbledore down but she couldn't think of a way to keep it up without Draco catching her. Hermione knew he wasn’t stupid, he would have figured it out eventually.
Leaving the owlery, Hermione started to walk to the Gryffindor common room. T was quite late now and dinner had finished a couple of hours ago but Hermione hadn’t eaten anything. She didn't feel like it and she knew that Draco hadn’t eaten either which made her feel worse. Now she understood by what Dumbledore meant about Draco not being bad but she wished she knew what he was up to...
‘Malfoy?’ Hermione asked in shock when she noticed the handsome blonde leaning against a wall where the Gryffindor common room was.
‘This boy has been nagging me for an hour and a half about whether a... what was it, son?’ the fat lady in the portrait said as Hermione walked up. She turned to Draco and then suddenly remembered, ‘oh yes! If a “frizzy haired brunette” had been through to the common room. I told him no but he thought I was lying.’
Draco rolled his eyes at the portrait and turned to watch Hermione as she walked up to him. She looked at him and they stared at each other for some awkward seconds.
‘I thought you wanted me to stay away from you?’ Hermione asked for the sole purpose of breaking the silence.
‘I did but... I realised that...’ Draco shrugged and trailed off, ‘I don’t know.’
‘You seem confused,’ Hermione said and then rolled her eyes, ‘come and see me when you know what you want to say. I’m tired so I’m going to bed.’ (Draco opened his to say something but Hermione interrupted him) ‘and no, you can’t join me or slither in. I’ve heard that too many times in the last six years, Malfoy. Don’t even try it.’
‘I wasn’t going to say that. I want you to know that... that I... I don’t want to lose you.’ Draco shrugged and then walked closer to her. Hermione raised her eyebrows at him and was about to remind him that he was the one that told her to stay away from him and now he had changed his mind just like that? Draco didn't give her a chance to speak, ‘it’s hard to admit my feelings for you but I have to or else... I’ll be all alone.’
‘Malfoy,’ Hermione said and then shivered when his hand caressed her cheek. She closed her eyes and leaned into his hand, ‘this is so wrong.’
‘It is so wrong but it feels right, doesn’t it?’ asked Draco with a whisper.
‘Mmm hmm,’ Hermione smiled at him as he closed the distance between their lips.
Draco kissed Hermione for a second on her lips and Hermione was somewhat surprised since his kisses usually weren’t like that. They were longer and more passionate but Draco pulled away from her after a quick peck.
‘You should go to bed,’ Draco shrugged, ‘I’ll see you tomorrow.’
‘Wait,’ Hermione said but Draco shook his head and then winced as though he had an headache.
Hermione watched him jog down the stairs and wondered what was wrong. Then she put it down to lack of sleep or lack of food. He would be better by tomorrow, she hoped, and then they could talk as long as they wanted. Hermione ignored the fat lady in the portrait as she eyed her strictly. She said the password and went into the common room, taking off her jumper. So much for staying away from Draco Malfoy. There was something about him that dragged her to Draco and she didn't know what it was. Love didn't cross her mind that night and she slept soundly.
Draco, on the other hand, had entered his own dormitory and had collapsed under the covers of his sheets. He put a cold hand on his warm face and lay there for a second or two. Draco took off his shirt and his jeans and lay in his underwear, feeling the heat of the sheets engulf him. He sighed as though he was in pain and only one thought occurred to him. It made sense. Even though she was probably a spy for Harry, Draco thought, she still managed to make him come and find her. There was only one reason why Draco was drawn towards her. Draco muttered a profanity under his breath and turned in his sheets.
‘I love her,’ Draco said out loud and the lake outside crashed against the rocks to give a soothing sound but Draco was agitated now as the realisation dawned onto him, ‘I... love her! Bloody hell!’