The idea of all four of us going to the airport had been a nice one.
The reality of it was much different.
Mainly because New York taxies were not that big and although Sarah, Lindsee and I were not that big, Mitch was easily six foot and we were all cramped along the one seat.
But it made me smile, I had to admit it was a very us thing.
It also helped the churning in my stomach at the thought of getting on an hour aeroplane in a little over two hours and the fact I had goodbyes coming up that I really didn't like.
It was kind of stupid but Lindsee and I had barely been apart for the past two years.
What was I going to do for the next three weeks?
I also knew my brother and Giovanni were going to be at the airport and I kind of really didn't want to deal with that. I knew Giovanni was coming to London too and I know it was nice of him to do that except I kind of didn't really want him to.
Hence why when'd mentioned that he didn't think he'd be able to get there until a couple of days before my birthday I said that was fine.
I was pretty sure he didn't even have a clue that there was a wedding I was invited to and had a plus one for, but that was fine. I was taking Lindsee anyway. I had asked Eleanor if that was okay and she had agreed wholeheartedly.
The few times they'd interacted over FaceTime they'd talked about their nails so they got on at least which was nice and I was pretty sure Lindsee really wanted to see Niall again and he always asked after her so I was pretty sure I was about to be cupid.
I stayed silent as the car finally got out of the city and approached ever closed to JFK and I tried really hard not to be sad, I mean I was going to be sad no matter what.
New York had turned out to be one of the best experiences of my life.
But there was a difference between being sad about leaving my friends and full-on sobbing at the terminal.
I thanked Mitch quietly as he hauled my cases out of the boot of the car and Lindsee slipped her hand in mine as we walked to the terminal and the minute the doors slid open I spotted Max and Giovanni.
They'd ended up coming together because apparently they'd had business this morning. I had a feeling it had something to do with the Rossi's company expanding to London.
But I didn't really care enough to ask.
"Hi." I smiled at Max as he pulled me into a hug and he rubbed my back before releasing me and I headed towards self-service check-in. I loved these things.
I scanned my passport and weighed all my bags before it printed out tags for them and my friends all took a bag each to strap a tag on and I felt my eyes tear up just as my boarding pass was printed.
With a bit of a struggle considering all four bags were heavy I plopped them on the conveyer belt and watched them disappear, hoping that they'd actually end up getting to London too.
It had never happened to me but I was absolutely paranoid that my bags would end up on the wrong plane and I'd never seen any of my stuff ever again.
The group of us grabbed some food and hung out chatting for a while, I didn't know why Max had bothered to come, yeah it was nice and I loved my brother but he'd barely been off his phone the entire time.
"I think I might have to go." Max finally spoke up and I looked away from the coffee I was nursing. "I have a meeting."
"Alright," I smiled, aware of the way his lip twitched, he was lying. "It's been nice. Come home more yeah?"
"Yeah, I'll try Pops. Have a safe flight, I love you."
I hugged Max tightly as he kissed my head and I squeezed him one last time before he looked at Giovanni pointedly and I almost begged him to take him with him but I kept my mouth shut.
"I'll be there for your birthday, promessa amore." Giovanni said as he lent in for a kiss and I pressed our lips together quickly.
"I'll hold you to it." I joked as I hugged him before he nodded at my friends and I watched the two of them walk away.
"Why's he going to London?" Mitch asked casually and I shrugged.
"Something to do with his company, I don't really know. I didn't ask." I admitted making Mitch snort and I glanced at my phone. "I should probably get going."
It was eleven o'clock and they usually started boarding about forty five minutes before.
"No." Lindsee shook her head and I sighed, swallowing thickly. I knew I was going to cry.
"Stop it." I said firmly as we tided up our plates and glasses before I stood and I rubbed my hands on my leggings.
"Alright well I hate goodbyes so, it's been great and we're gonna miss ya." Mitch said sincerely and I smiled at him as Sarah pulled me in for a hug.
I swallowed as I gave Mitch a tight hug too before the two stepped away from me.
"Don't be a stranger. And come back and visit us sometime!" Sarah smiled at me and I nodded.
"I promise, and you two are always welcome." I said honestly before Sarah kissed my cheek and Mitch gave Lindsee a pointed look.
"Don't cry." I told her seriously as Mitch and Sarah headed over towards some benches to wait for their friend.
"I'm going to miss you!" Lindsee pouted.
"Yeah well I'm going to miss you too but you'll be with me thirteen days! That's not long." I pulled Lindsee into my chest and squeezed tightly.
"That's going to be the longest we've been apart in two years!"
"I know but hey this might be good. What if we weren't having this time apart and realised we kinda hated each other?" I joked.
"I would never."
"Yeah me either." I sighed as I hugged her again, my eyes flicking up to the departures board, I had to go to my gate now. "I have to go Lins."
"I love you." Lindsee muttered as we hugged one last time before I pulled away and smiled, or rather tried to smile at her.
"I love you too." I said honestly, she really was my best friend. I'd never had a friend as good as her. "I'll see you soon."
"For sure." Lindsee nodded with glossy eyes, "Bye."
"Bye." I waved at her as I grabbed my bag and made sure I had everything, heading towards the short security line which was a first.
I refused to look over my shoulder knowing that she probably crying and if I saw her cry then I would cry too and I had spent my entire time in this airport when I moved here crying, I didn't really want to leave crying too.
I plugged my ears once I was through security and settled into a seat at my gate, glancing at my ticket seat 1D.
At least I was going to get priority boarding being in business class.
+
I stretched my legs out as I pulled the blind alongside me up as per the cabin crews instructions, my eyes peering out into the black and I sighed.
I was nearly home.
I swallowed as that thought settled into my brain, I had successfully put it off the majority of the flight. Admittedly I was asleep most of it but the fact they had The Office as well as all the Jurassic Park films on here helped.
I skipped through the tracks on my phone as I sat up properly, aware of the jerking of the plane as it began its descent and I sucked in a deep breath. It was fine, I'd flown so much these past few years I should be a natural.
I gripped the seat as the plane continued its drop down and I tried to focus on the Lana Del Rey song flowing into my ears and I closed my eyes, the heavy landing and subsequent bump came and soon went and then my music was drowned out by the noise of the engine.
I glanced out the window to see all the bright lights of Heathrow Airport and I sighed in relief, I wasn't dead.
And I was home.
I was starting to think I should have taken up Niall's offer of a lift home but it was almost one am and it definitely would be gone one by the time I got home, in fact with how slowly this taxi driver was going it was going to be closer to two.
I also didn't particularly want the first time he saw me in person in however many months to be when I just got off a seven hour flight and smelt kinda like the avocado I had dropped in my lap.
At least the driver wasn't that chatty.
My AirPods had died just as I'd got to the taxi which as annoying as it was, I was glad they'd lasted the entirety of my flight. I lent my head against the window as the scene changed from the industrial area of the airport to the motorway and then to the city.
I sat up properly as Regents Park came into view and soon enough the A5205 turned into the B525 and I knew it was only a matter of minutes until I was properly home.
"Here let me help you love."
I smiled as the driver got out of the car as I headed towards the boot and pulled out two of my cases.
"Thank you." I smiled as he pulled out the other two whilst I jabbed in the gate code, listening for the click before I pushed it open and propped one bag against it so it would stay open. "You can just leave them there."
"Alright if you're sure love. Have a good night." He smiled and I nodded, returning the sentiment quietly.
I turned my eyes to the dark house, I didn't know if it was because I hadn't been home in so long or what but it seemed bigger.
I genuinely hadn't spent more than two days at a time here since I'd moved and now I was going to be living here again.
I shook my head as I took two suitcases up to the porch before going back for the other two, my eyes catching a black car parked on the opposite side of the road and I felt my heart leap into my throat.
I shook my head as I stuck the key into the lock, now really wasn't the time to have a break down over my neighbour's car.
I crinkled my nose as I flicked the light on as I stood in the foyer, the night air creeping in behind me as I left the door open, even from where I was standing I could see there was a layer of dust covering everything.
At least all the sheets would have helped not coat all the furniture. They were just so fucking creepy, they looked like ghosts.
I shut the door behind me once I'd gotten all my bags in and I looked around. Dusting and housework could and would wait until tomorrow.
I was tired and just wanted to sleep in my own bed.
I grabbed the bag containing all my day to day clothes and turned the light off behind me as I climbed the stairs, my eyes glancing at the door opposite mine before I shook my head.
Old habits die hard.
I turned my attention to my own bedroom door, my eyebrows furrowing slightly as I noticed it was slightly ajar.
I always closed it. Just in case my Father ever came home but I was starting to doubt he was ever going to step foot in England again.
Maybe the catch was getting old and I'd have to get a new handle, whatever it could wait.
I shut the door behind me and looked around my room, my eyes darting to the blue box on my vanity before I looked away quickly.
I pulled the white sheet off my bed, sneezing a couple of times as some dust puffed up and I waved my hand through it as I just dumped the sheet on the window seat and pulled my curtains shut.
Usually, during the summer I slept with my curtains open but I didn't want the sun to wake me in the morning.
I rifled through my bag to find another jumper and pair of leggings and my toiletries before I headed into the bathroom and turned the shower on. I frowned as the water took a couple spurts before it came through properly and I sighed as I waited for it to heat up.
I combed my fingers through my damp hair as I absentmindedly looked around my room, the shower had sufficiently warmed my skin and the steam had helped to heat the bathroom which was seeping out into my room.
It wasn't even cold, I just felt cold.
My eyes found the photo frame next to my bed and I let out a shaky sigh as I plugged my phone into charge, I needed to remember to change my SIM card back to my English one tomorrow.
I picked up the frame as I sat on my bed, there was a thick layer of dust over the photo as there was in the majority of the house and I bit my lip as I stared at it, my face wasn't as dusty as Harry's.
I frowned as I lifted it closer to my face and squinted, in fact, there was no dust over my smiling face. I pulled my hand away from one side and looked at my fingers, the tips weren't dusty either.
It was like the dust had been wiped away.
I shook my head as I put the frame back down, I was so tired I was becoming delusional. I rolled my eyes at myself as I snuggled into bed, sleep immediately forcing my eyelids to grow heavy.
I was home, that was all that mattered.