Dear Diary,
Why do sixteen year old boys (namely, my brother) stink so much? I mean, not just that he’s stupid, which he is, but that he actually smells. Really badly. When he comes home from soccer practice, his blue and white uniform has pit stains on it! Hasn’t he ever heard of deodorant??? Well, I’M just glad I don’t have to do the laundry… I’d jump in front of a bus before I touch HIS sweat stains. Just a week or two ago, he shoved his stinky pit in my face while I was sleeping. And he KNOWS how I feel about it. He just uses it against me. When I’m a movie star, I’m gonna pretend I don’t know him… But, until then, I’m gonna need some immediate revenge… Too bad I can’t think of one. I’d ask Rory for help, since she’s the brains of the family, but she thinks Jake and I are being immature. Ironic, since she’s the youngest, isn’t it? She wants to be a stupid surgeon like Dad. She’s such a suck up, I’m surprised she doesn’t want to be a state judge like Mom. Well, actually, Rory’s not bad. She’s pretty cool… For a little sister, anyway. We’re so close in age, though, that she tries to hang around with my friends when they’re over, and that seriously bugs me. Well, bye for now. I gotta go beg Rory for help…