Author's note: Just a moment's rush, this is a very un-story-like short story. It's more to show the emotions and thought process behind someone in this kind of position. It's an acquired taste, I'm sure, but I'd still love feedback, both positive and negative!
From the moment he realized he liked her, he had buried it as deep as he could within his heart. There were too many things to consider, too many risks in place, too much to lose if he ever dared take a step forward.
"Ah, it's not that easy, it's too complicated."
"We're just friends, anything else is not meant to happen."
"I like the way things are right now, and I don't want that to change."
"I don't know if they will accept me."
Excuses like that are often laughed it. Many say that they are just excuses for those that don't have the courage to rise up and shape their own path, to face the risks, and to achieve something that can only be done by taking action. But what people never understand is how it feels for the person themselves.
Of course he wanted to go to her and spill his feelings. Of course he wished with all his heart that things can change to something more. Of course he wanted her to know.
After all, who wouldn't?
Like why else would there be those famous stories about people that just are not meant to be together and still try nonetheless, but usually end up worse than the way it was? They are usually dramatic and exaggerated, but he for one didn't think so. It was possibly one of the most precise depictions of how one's heart is tearing apart. It was definitely hinting that trying just makes matters worse. He felt it was the only way for anyone to understand the emotions of those that are facing this kind of situation. If anyone ever tried to explain to another who doesn't empathize, they would probably get laughed at.
The only difference is that those stories' characters had mutual feelings. That both sides wanted to be together, but fate was standing in the way. That their love would last forever, even in death. Take one side's love away, he thought, is perhaps the most tragic and heart crushing story that anyone could write, if they would ever realize that.
It's also something that is hidden from plain sight, slipping around in everyday life.
Which was basically Sebastian's life.