This was not fine. This was not fine at all.
My imagination had fallen short. Previously, the roles were reversed. Aiden was the one blushing, and I was the one in the towel. The tables had now been flipped. He was the one in the towel, his skin wet and his hair damp, flowing over his brows despite his efforts to push it back.
He walked around my apartment like it was nothing – like a towel wasn't slipping down his waist the more he moved or that his bronze muscles were on display.
"I don't have spare clothes here," he said once he noticed his clothes still hadn't dried while he was in the shower.
I was dressed in an oversized sweater from my wardrobe and thick black tights. Aiden entered my room while I brushed my hair, repeating his earlier announcement.
"I'm sure Lars has some spare clothes in Myra's room since he's here all the time." I ran my fingers through the untangled locks of hair I finished brushing. Aiden hummed and left for Myra's room, returning shortly with a blue shirt and jeans.
He held up the clothes as if there was something disturbingly wrong with them.
"This is all he has."
"What's wrong with those?"
He arched a brow. "They're blue. I don't wear blue. I hate blue."
"You hate a lot of things. Just wear the shirt, Aiden." I told him. He was picky when it came to clothes, but I needed him to get dressed for my sake.
Aiden scowled, rolled his eyes, and left the room once more.
"I look ridiculous in blue," He yelled from the bathroom. "It's such a... bright colour."
"Get over yourself. It's just a shirt." I shook my head, catching myself smile before he walked into my room. He held his hands out to showcase the clothes.
He was handsome in any colour.
"We are going to the frat house." He announced, stretching out the tight shirt he clearly found uncomfortable. I would have thought Lars and Aiden were about the same size, but either Aiden had been going to the gym recently, or Lars was smaller than Aiden.
I could not picture Aiden in a gym with so many other people, sharing equipment other people had touched or even being around them. Lars was probably smaller than Aiden, I decided.
"You need to stop being so dramatic. You look fine."
He scoffed. "I am not dramatic. These clothes don't fit. I want to wear clothes that fit."
"We are not driving all the way to the frat house so you can get changed."
"It's a five-minute drive, Emma. Ten minutes if there's traffic." He smirked. "Oh, you'd like me to walk around naked in your apartment, is that it?"
My eyes went wide, and I stammered with my words. "You are terrible. You're the one who pulled us into that rain."
His scowl slowly twisted into a smile. "The frat house it is, then." He affirmed.
So we drove to the frat house. We, unsurprisingly, took his car. It warmed up considerably faster than my car. However, the leather seats creaked awkwardly when you moved around or inhaled heavily.
Aiden and I climbed the house's wooden stairs to his room. The curtains were drawn, and there was no light in the room until he turned on a lamp. The place was cleaner than I'd ever seen it before. There was not a single thing that was misplaced or scattered around carelessly.
Aiden pulled some clothes out of his drawer and held them up like they were made from the finest fabrics. Then, he quickly changed into them.
"Much better." He adjusted his pockets and sat down beside me, where I had situated myself on the middle of his bed, looking at the textbooks I had brought with me. If I knew anything about Aiden, it was that he liked things to be in his element. That meant that we would not be returning to my apartment until I needed to go home the trip over. And I needed to study.
"Are you still working on that assignment?" He inquired from my side, peering into the white and blue pages decorated with words in a formal font.
"Yeah, I can't seem to work out what I'm supposed to be doing. I emailed the professor, but he still hasn't gotten back to me...." I twisted my mouth to the side, flicking the page over to find a colourful diagram.
"How about I go grab us some coffee or tea or whatever we have in the kitchen, and we can work on it together?" His eyes looked over mine, something sweet and light floating in them.
"Don't you have your own assignments so complete?"
He shrugged, "I don't mind. I'll gladly help you if you ask."
This was the kind of thing he did for the past weeks. He was sweet and considerate and cared more than he ever needed to. He offered to help when he could, comforted me when he couldn't and made me feel like it was all going to be okay no matter how many late assignments I submitted.
"I'll take anything you can find. Preferably decaf." I smiled and kissed him briefly before he went back downstairs with a smile.
I leaned back on his bed until my back hit the mattress, and my eyes stared up at the roof. I thought about the load of work I still had to complete and the library job I would have to go back to in an hour and a half. It would be a late shift this time, but a long one, nonetheless. It turns out that even though my father was paying for my apartment, and I hadn't needed to find a job, I still liked earning money for myself. I loved the independence and not having to depend on others for my needs.
That's when I knew I'd need something considerably stronger than decaf. I needed something to keep me awake and sustain any remaining energy.
I sat back up and edged off the bed, following the hallway to the stairs on my way to find Aiden.
My phone buzzed just as I was about to open the kitchen door. I was pausing to read Will's message when I heard voices from the other side.
I quickly figured out that it was Lars and Aiden talking. I hadn't the faintest idea what they were conversing about as I replied to Will, but Lars caught my attention the next time he spoke.
"What is up with you recently? First, at Aubrey's dinner, you leave suddenly. Then, you get angry at the mall, and at the Halloween party, you refuse to leave your room. Now, you're making tea. And you never drink tea."
"Last time I checked, I can do whatever I want. So I don't need to explain anything to you."
There was a short pause and then some mumbles I could not decipher.
"So, there is a girl?" Lars' voice lowered.
I stopped typing and listened in through the door.
"Get out of my way."
"What is she like?" He asked, a small amount of amusement in his tone.
Aiden did not answer, or if he did, I was not able to hear it.
"Blue eyes or brown?" Silence. "Blue? Alright, what about hair? Brunette or blonde? Red-haired, maybe?" Another silence, this time longer. "Oh. Shit, man. Is it Aubrey?"
"No. And stop asking me these fucking questions and get out of my way, will you?" Aiden had that angry and irritated tone he usually used with people.
There was a chuckle. "Alright, dude. Calm down. So it's not Aubrey."
There was nothing but silence, and I thought the conversation had been over until Lars spoke again, his voice softer. "You can talk to me, you know."
Aiden scoffed. "About what?"
"Anything. You can talk to me about this girl."
I heard cups and cutlery smacking on countertops for a while.
"Seriously, you can talk to me. What is she like?"
Silence.
"How do you feel about her?" Lars asked.
"If I wanted to talk about my feelings, I would see a therapist. I'm just trying to make tea."
"For her?" Lars mused.
I imagined that right now, Aiden's jaw would be clenched, and he'd glare at Lars for persisting on the subject. Secretly, I hoped he would continue talking to see what he would say. But a part of me knew it was wrong to listen in on this conversation. I wanted to leave. I did. But I didn't end up actually going anywhere.
"What do you want me to say, Lars? That she's beautiful? That she's the only one who's given a shit about me in years? That no matter how many times I've tried to push her away, I hurt myself more than I hurt her?" Aiden huffed loud enough that I could it hear through the door. Every single word wrenched my heart and made it beat faster. "Well, she is beautiful. She makes me laugh. And she does care, probably more than I deserve."
"Aiden. Whoever this girl is... you're right. She does deserve better than you."
My hands clenched at my sides, my chest heaving at Lars for what he had said. This was precisely why he didn't trust talking to anyone; because when he did, they'd tell him he didn't deserve the good things that came to him, that he was not worthy of them. Aiden deserved happiness, but no one could see it. No one even considered that the boy who pushed everyone away and acted out was always the one in pain.
"Break up with her, Aiden. You know you'll hurt her. It's all you ever do with people."
Whatever Aiden said in return, I did not hear it. I was already halfway up the stairs when the kitchen door slammed shut, and heavy boots neared behind me.
"Emma?"
***
Will handed me a cup of coffee as I stared out the window of the coffee shop. I had lost count of how many times I'd watched all kinds of people walk by. Students, elders, children were all living their separate, interconnected, and complicated lives.
Will cleared his throat, "So, I have news. Good news."
"What is it? Did you get a scholarship?" I reached for the cup he brought over and curled my hands around it to absorb its warmth. Will had recently talked about applying for a scholarship to change or apply to a course in culinary arts. He began to hate his law school classes and even the thought of becoming a lawyer. It was understandable since he had said that he did not want to become what his parents wanted for him on more than one occasion.
"No, I still haven't heard back from the places I applied to. But I went to one of those culinary schools to see what the places were like a few weeks ago. You know, a tour of the buildings and what everyone does?" I nodded. "I was trying to find my way to the bathroom when this light-haired girl helped me out. She goes to the school I liked, and we started talking and...." He fidgeted with his cup. "She's, uh... We're dating."
My mouth dropped open. The last I'd heard from Will, which was the first time we had met, he said dating was the last thing on his mind, that he would not attempt to start the process again for a long time. "Will, that's great! What's her name?"
"Her name is Kaylie."
As Will would have done, I drilled him with questions:
how long they'd been dating, why he hadn't said anything earlier and telling him over and over how happy I was for him.
"We've been going out for about three weeks. I didn't say anything because I didn't know if it would last or if I was even ready for it...."
"Clearly, you are." I smiled widely.
"That's why I wanted to talk to you. I told Kaylie about you, and now she wants to meet you."
"Really?" He chuckled at my surprise. "I'd be more than happy to, Will. Of course I'll meet her."
"Great! I was thinking we could go on a double-date sort of thing. It was her idea, not mine. She asked if you were dating someone, and the idea surged from there."
"I don't do double dates," Aiden interjected from a few feet away.
"It isn't my scene either, but Kaylie wants to meet Emma." Will countered, pushing away his coffee.
"There are a thousand other ways to meet someone that doesn't involve a double-date."
"What is so bad about the idea?" I asked them both.
"I prefer to spend my evening with people I actually like. But, unfortunately, that list does not include William."
"That list only contains one name: Emma's." Will clarified.
"I'm perfectly happy with my list the way it is." Aiden scowled at Will. "I already tolerate you enough for the sake of Emma. I won't spend the time I can spend with her, eating with you."
"You would be spending time with me." I smiled. "With us both." I gestured between Will and me.
Aiden grimaced. "Please don't tell me you like the idea,"
"Frankly, I do," I said.
Will gave Aiden a willing smile and leaned back in his chair with his arms crossed.
"When do you want to meet?" I asked Will.
"Kaylie suggested in two nights from now. If you're free. If not-"
"She's not free." Aiden interrupted once more.
"Aiden, we are going on this double-date whether you like it or not," I informed him.
"Well, I am not going." Aiden decided.
"You owe me, Aiden," Will argued. "After what you did with my last girlfriend, I expect you to attend this double-date without a single complaint."
Will had a good point.
"How many times do I have to tell you that I didn't know she was your girlfriend?" Aiden grumbled.
"Go with us to meet with Kaylie, and I'll never bring it up again." Will offered.
Aiden seemed to contemplate the offer for all of two seconds. Then, "I'm not going."