2006
June 23
It's been a week since Travis died and Justice hasn't shedded a tear since that day. she's been so obsessed with the twins and making sure that they're okay, she's been sleeping in our room every night because of her nightmares, and she's been avoiding his mother.
Travis's mother has been over here everyday trying to comfort Justice and talk to her about funeral arrangements but Justice refuses to come down stairs.
"Hi Ms. Taylor, how are you feeling today?" I asked letting her into the house. "I feel as bad as bad can get, but i'll get through."
"What brings you by?"
"Oh i'm not staying long I just came to let you know that the funeral will be next Wednesday, please tell Justice she needs to be there."
"She will be there and if there's anything you need us to do please let me know. Travis was like a son to us especially with everything he's done to help with Kamden and Kori, not only that he's been there for her since the beginning."
"No I just need you guys to make sure she's there please."
"Yeah we'll be there."
"I would like her to try to come to the wake as well but I doubt she'll come i'll get to you with that information and please have her call me I know she's traumatized."
"I'll try thanks for coming past make sure you're taking the time to rest and take care of yourself."
"I will thanks see you next week."
"See you." She walked out of the door and I watched as she pulled off. When I closed the door and turned around Justice was standing behind me.
"What'd she want today?"
"Checking on you like always, you hungry?" I asked walking in the kitchen. "No i'm not hungry surprisingly." She said sitting at the stool.
"When's the last time you ate Jus?"
"I don't know when Joey brought the food that one night."
"Justice that was five days ago what the hell is wrong with you?" I went into the fridge and pulled out lunch meat and mayonnaise. "I haven't been hungry and when I do eat it always comes back up so why force myself?"
"Well you're going to eat this sandwich and when you're done drink some water." I slid the sandwich over to her and Toni walked in.
"Oh your finally eating?" she asked and Justice rolled her eyes and took her plate grabbed her water out of the fridge and went walking upstairs.
"Damn Jan she's still mad."
"Yeah I know, what are you going to do about that?"
"I've apologized a lot of times and I mean a lot, I've given her space, I've given her time, hell she even sleeps with us what more can I do?"
"Tell her the truth maybe and stop trying to tell her what you think she wants to hear."
"Janet she'll hate me forever if she knew." I walked over to her and kissed her forehead. "No she won't especially after what just happened."
"Have you met justice?" she asked frantically. "Toni your the mother she's the child not the other away around you should not be afraid of her, plus she loves you I know it."
"Please save me the trouble of having to hear you lie."
"Toni I just talked to her yesterday and she just wants to know the truth, that doesn't mean your relationship will go back to being the exact same but that does mean you guys will talk more.... then you do now."
"Very funny Jan-" she was cut off by something falling upstairs. We both jumped up and ran as fast as we could to the twins room and they were sleep.
"What the hell was that Jay?" I ran into Justice's room and I could see blood coming from under the bathroom door. "Justice honey." I said knocking, when I opened the door she was passed out on the floor.
"Oh my god! Janet! What happened?!"
"Toni I don't know I was talking to you. Go get the phone and call 911 hurry!" Toni left out of the bathroom and I scanned the room. There were no signs of self harm but there was blood on the counter.
"Hello yes I need an ambulance my daughter is bleeding really bad I guess she passed out and hit her head."
"Ma'am is there anything the paramedics should know about your daughter?"
"She has epilepsy but she hasn't had an episode since she was diagnosed a year ago."
"Okay the ambulance is five minutes out have your door unlocked." Toni hung up and ran downstairs to open the door. "Tone go get the twins ready I don't want them in the hospital."
"Well where are they going to go? Cause I'm not taking them anywhere and neither are you we're all going to the hospital with Justice."
"Fine....fine you stay here and I'll get them dressed you can ride with her in the ambulance." I got up and walked out of the room just when the paramedics came in.
"Up here! Through that door right there, we were downstairs and we heard some drop and she was passed out." I said walking into the twins room. After ten minutes they had her in the ambulance and she was still unconscious.
When I got to the hospital I tried my best to blend in and not draw attention to myself. I had two kids on my hips and my hat on. I walked to the desk and asked for Justice.
"Ma'am nice try but her mother's already here."
"Ma'am nice try but that was my wife-" I stopped talking because I could hear Justice scream. I looked over and Toni walked out of a room and stood against the wall. "Never mind sir."
I walked over more like ran to Toni and I noticed she was crying. "Baby what's wrong what's going on?"
"Uh she wants you and only you, I tried Jan- baby I tried she doesn't want me right now." Kori reached out for Toni and she took her, Kori wiped her face and started giving her a bunch of kisses.
"Aww at least two out of three of your girls love you." She pushes me and started laughing. "It's not funny baby."
"I know I'm sorry now what room is she in?" She pointed to a door and took Kamden. "We'll be in the car."
"Okay." I walked in and she was curled up in a ball. "Justice."
"Yeah." She answered barely above a whisper. "What'd the doctor say?"
"Was a seizure I just hit my head, and they want to keep me here over night to observe me." I sat on the bed and rubbed her leg.
"The last time this happened was when Travis left you for five minutes-"
"This time he left me forever." She said with no emotion. "Baby I know this is hard for you and I am nobody to tell you how you should feel but can you let us be here for you?"
"You're here right now aren't you?" I walked over to the chair that was facing her and sat down. "Not just me, Taylor...Lauren....your mother."
"She is not my mother."
"Yes she is, Toni is the one who wanted a child, she's the one who made sure the donor was the right one, she's the one who went through the morning sickness, aches, pains, and she's the one who carried you. If anyone one of us is your mother it's her. I know she made a lot of mistakes... a lot of them but that's because she's human and if I can forgive her you should too."
"It's not that easy. You didn't go through everything like I did. I had the terrible childhood you had fame and a wife."
"Fame doesn't mean shit to me that's just how I provide for my family, look I understand everything you went through, but you need to forgive that doesn't mean forget though. Just please please let us be here for you and talk to Toni she just wants to love you and your making it harder for her."