He called about a week later. It was Julie who answered the phone, which was laying on Dana's desk while she had stepped out of the room for a minute.
"Hello. Is Dana at home?"
"Depends on who is asking." Julie replied eloquently.
"This is John speaking."
"Ah. Wait a minute. She is just coming through the door." She put her hand over the receiver. "Dana?", she said. "There is a guy on the phone, who has a real sexy voice, and whose name is John."
Dana almost got a heart attack. She had been wondering whether he would be calling at all. Or when. Now that he did, it was a shock.
"Sure!" She swallowed hard, walked over to the phone, and took it. "Hello?!"
"Hello, Dana!" he said. "How are you?"
"Fine."
"I was wondering, what you are doing right now?"
"Homework", she replied.
"I am done for today. Would you like to go for a cup of coffee or something?"
"Yeah, sure. Sounds good."
"Or are you too busy with your homework? I was just wondering, you know."
"No it's okay"
"How long does it take you to get ready?"
"Fife minutes?"
"Oh!" Pause. "How about, I pick you up in thirty in front of your dorm?"
"Do you know where it is?"
"Of course! I did my homework." He was laughing softly.
"Okay", said Dana. "In thirty then."
"Mhhm!" He hung up, so did she. Julie was eyeing her curiously.
"What kind of conversation was that? Did you swallow your tongue or something?"
"No! I just didn't expect him to call."
"Who was he anyway?" Julie started to walk to her closet to get her shoes. She was meeting her study-group at the library.
"This guy I met at Daisy Dukes' the other day..."
"Ahhhh." Julie looked at Dana in curiosity. When her friend did not elaborate on the topic any further, Julie said Goodbye and headed out the door.
Dana got ready herself and left to meet Jonathan. She wondered if he might be afraid of being discovered. But then, the series did not pick up too many viewers, yet.
He was sitting in a dark-blue BMW, the window rolled down. He got out of the car when he saw her coming down the path and waved at her. Boy, Dana thought, he looked really cute!
"Hi!" she said.
"Hi yourself" he said. His eyes were meeting hers and he smiled. He opened the door for her, so she could climb in. "What would you like to do?" he asked when he sat down in the driver's seat and buckled up. She hadn't thought about it up to now, had been way too confused about that he had actually called.
"Do you know McCormick's?" she asked.
"No", was his answer.
"We could have a cup of coffee and go for a walk afterwards!"
"Sounds good to me." He started the car. "You lead the way."
Half an hour later they sat in the café, in front of them two cups of coffee and two slices of pecan-pie. John looked at Dana and smiled, as she stabbed her fork into the deliciously looking cake.
"What are you smiling about?" she inquired.
"You know, Claudia never eats any cake. She didn't even eat a slice of our wedding cake."
Dana stopped chewing. "You're kidding!"
John shook his head in earnest, and began digging in to his cake.
"Remember, when you told me to say Hello to Claudia for you?" He was starring at his cake. Dana swallowed.
"Mhm!" she said. What next?
"I didn't mention that I met you."
"Why not?"
"We have some problems at the moment". He was fiddling with his fork. "With me being here, and her being there... We both love our jobs. And we both want to do be good at what we do. And then there are the kids... She is quite sensitive right now." He finally looked at her.
"You have kids?" For some reason Dana was shocked. Her picture of Claudia and John did not contain children, for some reason.
"Yes. They are four months now. They weren't planned, you know." He grew silent for a second, then resumed: "We thought that it would give our marriage what it lacked."
"What it lacked...?" Dana was confused. In California they had seemed to be the happiest couple she ever met. Had it all been an act?
"Yeah. It started after our holidays. I had the feeling, something was missing in our relationship. Claudia started working harder than before on her career. She wanted to become an associate. When she told me that she was pregnant I thought 'Well, we didn't plan it, but maybe it is ought to be that way.' I thought that things would turn out to be better once the kids where there. But they didn't."
He glanced out the window. Dana didn't dare to interrupt. "Frank got me this rehearsal in Attempts to Tame the West", John continued. "They offered me the part of Garrett, and I wanted the job. So I signed the contract. Claudia was three months pregnant, so it was to late f - to, well - do anything about it." He actually looked troubled and has turned a slight shade of pink. He looked up. His smile did not reflect in his eyes. "So I went to Montana, she worked her way towards the top of the firm. The babies came. Twins. We got a Nanny. That's it."
Dana was silent for a while. Than she said: "I am sorry. I didn't know."
Jonathan nodded, finished his pecan-pie, then sighed "I am ready for this walk now."
Dana finished her cake and coffee, he paid the bill, and they took off to Pioneer Park, which was just around the corner. It was grown with scrubs and trees, and a paved pedestrian road invited sporty people to enjoy the man-shaped nature reserve at a slow pace. As they walked along the path, he talked about his work, she told him about her classes and about her plans. They talked about surfing, and how much they both missed it, about horse breeding and the weather; Claudia was not mentioned once. All in all, it was a very nice afternoon.
******
They started to see each other whenever John had time off. They went for lunch or dinner. Sometimes they went for a walk. They became regulars in McCormick's Cafe. Sometimes they would even go to the movies. Dana really enjoyed being with John. She felt like they had known each other for years. She could be as childish as she wanted. He never frowned about her behavior, laughed with and not about her, and never said things like "Child, why don't you let your hair grow long!" or "Dana, watch your figure!". That's what her mother told her all the time. When she was with her, she felt like she had to excuse herself for being the way she was. She remembered that she had felt that way with Claudia as well, even though she had adored her, and liked her a lot. But she didn't want to venture into this direction of thinking any further, because then she began wondering why John had kissed her back than. That was a path she did not allow her thoughts to follow. She didn't want to spoil the friendship they had established, she told herself. Buried deep inside her head she knew that she didn't want to talk about it, because she was afraid of his answer.
******
One evening, he called to cancel the date they had the next afternoon.
"Claudia and the kids are coming down." That was all he said. "I call you next week. Okay?"
"Sure", Dana answered, unable to say something else. "Enjoy. Nevertheless."
"Thanks. Bye."
"Bye."
Dana stood, holding the cell phone, looking at the black screen. All the sudden, she felt lonely. Very small, and very young.
"Are you all right?" Julie, who was sitting at her desk, doing some kind of statistics assignment, asked.
Dana nodded. No, nothing was okay.
"Do you want to join me for Attempts to Tame the West? It starts in fife minutes? We haven't been spending time for quite a bit."
"Sure. Turn on the TV. I think I have to tell you something." Dana felt the urge to finally tell Julie all about Jonathan/Garrett.
"You want to tell me something, and want me to turn on the TV?" Julie was confused. Dana nodded her head in agreement.
They sat on her bed. Julie waited. The trailer appeared. Jonathan Lewis as Garrett Fox.
"Remember when I was in California with my parents?" Julie bobbed her head. But it only was a rhetorical question. "I met this beautiful woman. Her name was Claudia. I don't know – we kind of liked each other. Well, I liked her anyway. But I think she liked me, too... Don't know why, she was a beauty, older, too.... Anyway. We met for drinks at the hotel, and there was her husband. He was a surfer as well, so we would sometimes meet at the beach. We – all three of us – had real great talks about anything and nothing. We spend quite some time together. When I was not with my parents, I was with them. She was so very nice, Claudia was. And so good-looking. And I liked John, too. He was great to talk to." The show was forgotten. Julie watched her friend expectantly. "Well, I don't know how. But one day we went for a walk. John and I went ahead and ended up kissing." Julie's jaw dropped. She drew in her breath. "I left two days later. We never talked about it. I don't know why it happened. He is 13 years my senior. He has this beautiful wife. I got the feeling that he loved her! So..." Dana shrugged and fell silent.
"How did it feel?" Julie asked, smirking.
"What do you mean?"
"The kiss. How did it feel?"
Dana smiled. "Great. Real good. If Claudia hadn't appeared, I don't know what might have happened." It was true. She had not dated much. I High School she had only been out with two guys, one of them had finally made the race and had become her steady boyfriend. Jake had been a nice guy. Sweet, bright and funny. A much better kisser than Ray – which had been one of the reasons she had picked Jake over Ray. If he was a better lover, she could not say. Their first time had been a quick affair of kissing and groping. It was over without her climaxing. Jake had made up of it later – and more than once. But it had not lasted. They had split up when he left for Miami, Florida, where he was excepted to study engineering. Since than, Dana had had a few dates with fellow students here at Billings University but nothing that had rocked her boat. When John had kissed her, it had been the first time since Jake that she had felt that wonderful warm flutter in her stomach. He had smelt of sun and salt; his tongue had touched hers and after a split-second of pure shock she had given in to him.
"His wife appeared?" Julie asked astonished and interrupted her thoughts.
"Yes, but she hadn't see us. I don't know if she knows. I think, that women feel when something is wrong with their partner."
"Mhm. I think so, too."
"But she never gave me the feeling that she knew." Pause. "I didn't think about any of it until about four weeks ago. Remember the guy I met at Daisy Duke's?"
Julie nodded.
"That was him. I almost got a heart attack when I saw him!" Dana had to laugh when she remembered how she had tried to hide in the crowd.
"What was he doing here?" Julie wanted to know.
"He is working. Actually, I saw him about an hour before we left."
Julie frowned in confusion. "Really? Where?"
"On TV."
"On TV?" Julie looked at here blankly.
"Yes," Dana nodded towards the TV. Attempts to Tame the Westwas on. Julie looked at Dana in amazement.
"He is in the show??" She almost screamed.
"Yes! I didn't know that he was an actor. Well. I knew he was playing some parts in some theaters. But I had no idea that he was a TV star. And then I saw him there." She pointed at the screen.
"Who is he?"
"Can you guess?" Dana asked. Garrett was her favorite character.
"No!" Julie looked like she didn't believe a thing Dana was telling her.
"John." Dana said. "Jonathan Lewis." She was looking at the TV. Garrett Fox was showing Ms. Wild how to ride a horse properly. Julie glanced from Dana to the TV and back. Then she said." Just a minute! Is this the John who called a few weeks ago when I answered your phone?"
"Yes." Dana was smiling at Julie. "That's him."
"Gosh!" was all Julie was able to say. After a while: "And what happened just now? A few minutes ago? On the phone?"
"We have had a date for tomorrow. But Claudia and the kids are coming. So he had to cancel it."
"The kids?"
"The kids. Twins."
"And what is your problem now?" Julie wanted to know.
Dana though about it. It was a good question. Was she disappointed that he had called it a rain check? And if so, why?
"To be honest, I don't know. What if I meet them downtown? I like Claudia. And we weren't actually doing anything – you know – forbidden. Only, I feel really bad about what happened in California."
"Do you love him?" was Julie's simple question.
"NO!" The answer came out far too quick and definite for Julie's taste. But she didn't say anything, just shrugged her shoulders.
"Okay! Then there is no reason why you shouldn't go downtown in the next few days."
"Very funny! You're not very helpful, Julie!" She got up from the bed.
Of course she couldn't fall asleep that night. She wrecked her brain, but it did her no good: Naturally, she liked John a lot. But she still didn't know how to take California or the friendship they had now. He was thirteen years her senior! He would soon be a famous actor, would meet hundreds of beautiful women, had one of those at home (even though it didn't go too well with the relationship right now). Why should he commit himself to her? Anyway, there had not been any attempt from his side to get closer to her.
After some tossing and turning she told herself: Stop fussing! You have nothing to hide! You and him - that's friendship and that's all. I will not stay in the dorm for a week! That's ridiculous! And finally, Dana drifted off to sleep.
******
The next morning in class – The Law of Public Communication – she couldn't keep up her concentration. Still her eyes on Mr. Smith, the professor, she thought about Jonathan and Claudia: Did they still have sex? They had two kids. But did he still sleep with her, even though they had these problems? Was he true to his wife? Or did he cheat on her? Maybe with some of those actresses on set? There were plenty of those good-looking women in his crew. After all, he was good-looking, charming, and sweet... How many women did he have since they had started meeting?
"Ms. Hendrikson?" Dana startled. "Did my words reach your ear, Ms. Henrikson?"
"Sorry, I had my thoughts someplace else." Dana blushed and tried to pay attention for the remainder of the class.
******
True to her word, Dana didn't stay at home all week long. When she went downtown she hoped that she would not run into Claudia, John and the kids. All the same, she kept looking, and silently hoping that she would. But she never did. It was a relief, because she wouldn't have known what to say - especially if John would have been with them. Would she casually say "See you later!" or ask if he had been to the restaurants with his family they frequented?
******
John called two weeks later. Still, when Dana saw the dialer ID, she froze. Reality had hit too close to home for her to face John. To her, it felt like a betrayal, like she was a cheap cheat. She was sure that John had not mentioned their friendship - or whatever it was - to his wife. All the sudden, the entire situation did not sit right with her.
Julie rolled her eyes and picked up the phone.
"Hello?"
"Hello. This is John. Is Dana not around?"
"Oh! Hi, John!" Julie said looking at Dana. The later was shaking her head furiously. "I am sorry; she is not here. For some reason, she forgot her phone back here..."
"Oh! Well, do you know when she will be back?"
"No, I don't. Do you want to leave a message?" Dana was eyeing Julie nervously.
"Actually I wanted to take her out to dinner or something. But if she is not home..."
"Well, I could come along", Julie suggested.
John laughed: "Yeah, right. Please tell her I called. And maybe she could call me back."
"Sure!"
"Bye then."
"Bye, John!" Julie hung up. "What was that all about!" She demanded to know from her friend.
"I can't talk to him. I simply can't! Even to think about it makes me stomach ache." She did not know why that feeling had befallen her so quickly. Her heart was thumping in her throat. You are being silly, she told herself. It's just coffee and a walk – just like before.
"He told me to tell you to call him."
"Thanks!" Dana said, but never did.
******
He called again three days later. But Dana kept declined his call. When she told her room-mate, Julie grew angry: "One day you will need to talk to him, Dana!"
"But not now." Dana simply answered.
When John called for the third time, Dana and Julie were having coffee and a chat at their favorite coffee shop on campus. Julie grabbed the phone and answering it before Dana could. This time she said: "Oh. Hello John. Just a sec. I give you to Dana", and handed the phone to her friend, who was swearing under her breath.
"Hi."
"Hello. Are you all right? Why didn't you call me back?", he asked, sounding both concerned and annoyed.
Dana sighted and took heart: "John, we need to talk!"
He sighted as well. "Dana. I have so many things to think about right now. Please, don't do this to me."
"We either talk or this is the last time you heard my voice."
"Dana...." Pause. "Okay. When? Tonight?"
"No. How about tomorrow, around 8 p.m. You can pick me up as usually."
"I'll be there", said John.
"Good." Dana hung up the phone. Her heart was racing. She felt like she would faint any second. Through a misty cloud she heard Julie saying: "Finally!"
******
When she left the dorm 5 to 8 the next evening, it was freezing cold. John was already waiting. She climbed into the car: "Hello." He looked tiered; somehow she felt sorry for him.
"Hi. Do you want to talk right here or go someplace?" He wanted to get it over with, that was obvious.
"How about McCormick's?" Dana suggested.
He started the car, and 15 minutes later they reached their favorite coffee bar. They ordered coffee - black and Pumpkin Spice Latte -, John got an additional salad. They found a table and settled down. Dana looked out of the windows and watched people walking by in fur coats with their shoulders drawn up against the cold. John was pouring milk into the black liquid. He had not said a thing after they had left campus, except when he had placed his order with the waitress. She looked him in the face and asked bluntly: "Did you tell Claudia, we are seeing each other?"
John sighted and looked at her in earnest: "No."
Dana looked down at her hands and the table. She had to do his now! She took heart: "Why did you kiss me in California?" In case he was surprised, he didn't show.
"Why...?"
"Yes. Why did you kiss me?" A faint smiled appeared on his face. He locked eyes with her. "Because... Because you were so much ... alive. You didn't mind wet hair, or wearing no makeup." He snorted. "When Claudia was on the board, the only thing she cared about was that her hair would get wet, that is would get a sunburn, that her makeup might become smeared – even though it was waterproof. She was afraid she would ruin her nails." She shook his head in disagreement. "You didn't mind sunburn. You don't need to wear perfectly fitting clothes, or spend hours putting on makeup. You don't count your calories every day. You don't need to analyze every single sentence one says. You laugh out loud. You walked around the beach wearing no shoes, and didn't mind, that your toes were not polished. You are so ... beautiful, sweet, alive..." His voice trailed off. Looked into his cup. Looked up. Looked at her. Dana didn't know what to say. She was overwhelmed, shocked, astonished, flattered. All at the same time.
"Oh", was all she could say.
They finished their coffee in silence. After John had paid the bill, they went to Pioneer Park for some walking. It was almost dark.
"I'm glad we finally talked about it", John said as they walked towards at the playground. "Or is there more?" He stopped. Dana stopped as well. "No. I don't think so. I... just did not expect this. I don't know what to say."
"Dana, the last weeks were the most horrible weeks I've ever had in my life. First Claudia came over. I mean, I know that we should be working on our marriage and that I should have liked that she is making an attempt by coming over. But it was hell." John hunched his shoulders. If against the cold or because of the thought of Claudia's visit, Dana could not say. His glance was fixed on a branch that was laying on the lawn. He continued: "Then you didn't want to talk to me... That was hell as well. At least I know what's going on with Claudia and me. I know how to assess that situation. But I didn't know why you didn't want to talk to me anymore." John turned to face her and took her chin in his hand. It was warm against her cold skin. "Please, never do his again. I can't bear this right now."
She knew what would happen, and she wanted it. She came to meet him, and under the old oak tree they kissed. In the very back of Dana's mind a little voice was chuckling: See, I knew all along that you love him.